Dear Dublin Bay Socks.
I am very sorry for what happened last night. I never meant for you to find out this way. I thought that if I took you to The Dream in The Park,
we could have a beautiful evening together, and forget that we haven’t had much time for each other. I realized when I saw your low key colours and unassuming lace pattern that I still love you. You are so good to me and the children love you so,
and I don’t think that we would have had such a good time without you there. When I saw you under the stars in High Park, with the trees swaying above us and the stage lights glittering off of your needles, I remembered all the things that I love about you. I know you suspected all along that there was someone else, and I shouldn’t have pretended that there wasn’t a problem.
I beg your forgiveness then, for accidentally jamming you into the same pocket as Lauries roving socks, I know it was a horrible way for you to have to learn about my vicious deception. I swear that I didn’t know they were coming, I wouldn’t have shoved them in your face like that, I didn’t ever imagine that they would be in the front pocket of my backpack… I’ll talk with them. I’ll tell them to please stop following me around, It’s just a fling, the flashy colours, I swear it. Please….after all we’ve done together, The water park? The movies? Riverdale Farm? Was all that nothing to you?
It’s not you, it’s me.
Yarn Harlot
Hee. At least you have the decency to _try_ to keep your WIPs from knowing about each other. Currently I have at least six, flung about with abandon (well, not quite, but definitely lying about in plain sight) in the same room. It’s like a knitting harem in there!
Dear Dublin Bay Socks,
Do not believe the Harlot. She smiles sweetly and whispers sweet nothings to you. But for her, the thrill of new romance will never lose its sway. Today the flashy socks, tomorrow someone new.
She is, after all, not called the Harlot for nothing.
Run now, before your sockly-self-esteem is further decimated. Run far and fast…perhaps to America?
You poor besotted socks,
She’s “Yarn Harlot,” shouldn’t that have been your first clue?
But before you throw yourself into the winds of FATE (and possibly emigrate to the States for my true lovin’), please know that many of us are guilty of such multi-project affections.
All I’m saying is don’t throw it away with the Harlot after all you’ve been through… It could be worse. Much worse… didn’t you smell smoke at one point this week?
You poor, poor socks, did you at least have a good time at the show? Just remember when things get low that you are, after all, the *Dublin Bay Socks* 🙂
You know how there are some girls who just can’t help but be attracted to boys they *know* are ultimately going to break their hearts?
Maybe there are socks like that, too.
As the mother of and, by necessity, the voice of the Dublin Bay socks, let me lay your fears to rest. I brought the socks up to believe in themselves, to have confidence in themselves, to know that they are special even if they aren’t as beautiful or as smart as the next pair, and to know that they have something to contribute to the world, in however small a way. Just know that when you’re tired of the high life, tired of all the bright lights, the tawdry relationships, the cheesy glitter, the cheap thrill of the quick fixes and the easy money, the Dublin Bay Socks will always be there waiting for you, glass of milk in one hand, plate of chocolate chip cookies in the other, ready to give you a soft and comforting place to land. (But…um…you might want to start keeping a nightlight on at night when you go to bed, just in case.)
I love your blog. I was just thinking/posting on my blog about why I start so many projects without finishing some first. I realized that it’s the excitement of a new “relationship”. I guess I don’t really sneak around on my WIP’s though. I end up throwing a couple of them in my bag together at any given time. Is that cruel?? hehe
Yeah, Luanne’s feeling a bit jealous with Kate and Kersti’s Rainbow taking up room in my knitting bag. Can I help it that she’s kinda skinny and well, she’s needy. Those eyelets. Counting. How can that compare to the sweet, easy-going nature of those other girls with their 2×2 rib. Poor Luanne.
Gotta say some of us are somewhat, erm, disturbed by the fad for referring to projects as “she” and “her”.
This is knitting wool made into garments, yeah?
Kinda gives us the eehees.
A menage a trois? In public *and* in front of the children?
Trollop!
Hi there!
Just wanted to say that I enjoy reading your blog! I’m “delurking” to let you know that I just recently shared your experience on the Mango tank! (mine is the “teal” tank) I had about 5 inches knitted up when I realized that I misread the instructions!
Rip……Rip……..Rip……! I think I’ll wait a day or two before I attempt it again! You’re right, the lacey section takes forever!
Cheers!
Tanja
Kathy M — yes. (No offense, Nathania, I hope!)
The names I sometimes give my projects are more along the lines of “that damn sock” and “the tedious sweater.”
(And can I say that I love the phrase “gives us the eehees”?)
Oh, no! This could become a serious situation! Hide all of your angora yarn. Quickly! We all know what happened to bunnies in Fatal Attraction!
Great post. Too funny!
Steph, this is the best laugh-out-loud blog entry I’ve read in the last few days. Don’t worry, in the end, the socks will forgive you and let you back into their good graces. They always have before, haven’t they?
Truth had to come out sooner or later. You couldn’t carry the deception on indefinitely…
It happens to all of us!! Honest. Two-timing, or three or even four! But maybe it makes them try harder to make a bigger impression… At least that’s how I justify my indiscretions. 🙂
And if we don’t make socks to walk all over them, well then….
LOL, Barbara, “makes them try harder”… I just have visions of waking up to frogged projects after they’ve confronted one another after I’ve gone to bed… LOL
Oh, wow, you totally had me giggling! As a real life polyamorist, though, I have to say: you can all work this out. Just be very honest with everyone, and don’t sneak behind anyone’s back (or feet), and it will all be fine! (^_^)