Absolutely never “ts”

I believe that “thump” was the noise my body made when I arrived home late Saturday night/Early Sunday morning. (I say it was late Saturday night. It can’t be morning if I didn’t sleep.) The last 48 hours of the tour were so intense that I recall very little with any real clarity. There’s a lot of yarn and chocolate in my suitcase, a collection of interesting pictures on my camera and a cryptic note to myself in my notebook that reads

“grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. “

I have no idea what this means. (Probably that I was delirious at some many points in the State of Massachusetts.) Check? Does that mean I did it and don’t need to worry or that it’s important that I check on L.mre? I’ve made myself nuts trying to figure it out, being particularly interested in “don’t ts” since it seems to be a warning of some kind. Is it a promise I made? Did I come home and “ts” when I shouldn’t have? Plus? Plus what? If I’ve already ts’ed what will happen if I don’t recall that L.mre? Striping?

I would be interested in receiving a comment today from any one who:

A) was present when I wrote that down and has any idea what I meant.

B) Had a conversation with me about this note that I do not recall due to exhaustion, glee or wool fumes.

C) feels that they may have insight into my mind and would like to guess.

A ball of sock yarn goes to the best answer. (Note that I said the “best” answer, not the most accurate.) Knit event reporting will continue tomorrow when I can sit upright. I shall endeavor not to ts by avoiding modernist poetry until then.

212 thoughts on “Absolutely never “ts”

  1. I think you were obviously inquiring about striping sock yarn and did not want to alert your travelling sock of your harlotty interest in the yarn. So the note was written in code and ts is “tell sock” as in don’t tell the sock. L.mre must be the person who will answer your question on the sock yarn. 🙂

  2. If you don’t remember it’s not important and anyway you were fantastic at WEBS on Sat. Cardiac cath or not I would not have missed you for anything. Thanks again.

  3. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Somewhere in your stash you have a green sock yarn that may even be striping (a plus!), you’ve reminded yourself to not toss (ts) it and to have Le Mere (?, you’re mom? grandma? not sure here) check. Sadly, you’ve forgotten who you are checking on this yarn for.
    That said it was fun meeting you, I hope the Canyon Cafe fed you well and glad you arrived home safely.

  4. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    I think you encountered some sort of yarn company which you abbreviated “Grenyrn” and you thought it would be a PLUS if they had any self-STRIPING variety left…but they don’t THINK SO…but they might have a LITTLE MORE, so they will have to CHECK.

  5. “Figure out how s/he made that fancy striping thing with the green yarn. Don’t tell self. Let me recheck.” Or, paraphrased: “Wow, that patterned knitted piece made from green yarn is really cool. Yet I don’t want to understand it right now–too complicated for me at the moment. I’ll check in on myself later and see how I’m doing. Then maybe I’ll be ready for those stripes plus, at which point I’ll tell self.”

  6. Perhaps it was a note joted down while you were at Webs and delusional from the lack of COFFEE (Steph, if I had known the area better and had known where to find you a lovely steaming cup of Dunkin’ Donuts, you better believe I would’ve sent Matt out to get it – esp after he admitted not stepping up to help with the mic issues because he was afraid you’d pick on him… YOU, pick on a musician / electrical engineer? HA! lol). Let’s see… perhaps it was a note to self about rechecking the green self striping sock yarn in the Webs warehouse (OMG – the size of that place… CANDY STORE!)… and don’t “toss” (i.e. get SO excited you’d throw up!) when you go back in to “recheck” for the 3rd time… 🙂

  7. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Skipping over the obvious allusion to the marvelous green-yarn striped socks of the previous post (we avert our eyes from whatever “plus” your covetous nature was asking to be added to such perfection)
    and assuming that the final phrase was in the nature of “Laurie” (yes, That Laurie) “must remember to check” how to effect whatever it was you wanted “plus,” (obviously you were deep into planning some project for her to custom dye)
    we come to the hidden, black heart of the message, the mysterious “don’t ts.” It is with an aching heart and a lifted brow that I am forced to let you know that I’m onto you. Obviously it stands for…
    Don’t Tuesday spin.

  8. I am also trying hand spinning – but I got a tip which might help you eliminate the stripes you were getting in the shawl you were making – Adrian from Hello Yarn suggests that you predraft the fiber and split it up and roll it into balls and put it into a bowl and mix it up a little and then you can have the colors blending together, rather than the way that they were dyed.

  9. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    “Green Yarn and socks knitted, striping a plus- Don’t tease. Leave more checks.”
    Sounds like a rockin good time in Beantown!! *winks*

  10. Feh. There. Tyoed the url in correctly this time. I still want to know who Le Mere is….or maybe you were drinking Grenier while knitting with the striping sock yarn and almost got sick? Nah.

  11. I agree with Carron on the “Don’t think so” part. My guess is that “Grenyrn ask striping plus” means asking about green striping yarn. “L.mre check” can be “L.M. re-check” which could be someone’s initials who will check the yarn out.
    Btw, I did talk about your visit to Cambridge on my blog. Hope you like the entry I wrote!

  12. by any chance was there a bottle of wine involved? if so, drink until you remember… but if you can’t feel your lips, and you still don’t know, scratch that theory…
    “Green yarn, ask striping plus- don’t test tensile strength(The resistance of a material to a force tending to tear it apart, measured as the maximum tension the material can withstand without tearing.) let Mr. E check.”

  13. Sounds like a “Waiting for Godot” line to me. Perhaps the wool fumes/chocolate high made you channel the character of Lucky and blurt out the secret of life in a wooly knitting pattern-esque speech.
    It’s essentially the answer to string theory (oh God, a pun!), an e=mc2 moment captured in the first line, and the abbreviated warning “Don’t TELL a SOUL!” following the dash.

  14. I have no idea, but you can bet I’ll sit straight up in bed at 3am tomorrow with an answer. SIGH.
    I liked Rams’ answer best so far. Don’t Tuesday Spin. Heh.

  15. I think that the “grenyrn” and “striping” refers to the green Regia Strato that everyone was grabbing at Web’s on Saturday – $6 per ball…I walked out of there with one in nearly every color.
    “don’t ts” to me would mean “don’t take sh#t” for buying even more sock yarn for the stash.
    Great time on Saturday! Thanks for coming to Western Mass.!

  16. Amazing experience Friday night – all those knitters. I felt instantly comfortable, which is unusual in crowds.
    As for the cryptic note, nothing useful nor funny comes to mind. I would look at your check book to see if you bought anything.

  17. By the way, if you were so out-of-it, are you sure that’s what you wrote? Could those letters be something else? Know a doctor who might translate the chicken scratching?

  18. It was notes about the last yarn shop you visited:
    Found solid green yarn, but then
    asked for and got self-striping yarn instead.
    Plus, the clerks there don’t tease Yarn Harlots who are really short on sleep and forget their credit cards.
    Luckily, Mr. Edwards takes international checks.

  19. I’m guessing its “dont Take Sh!t” – either from your yarn-pushing Bostonian knitting family, or perhaps you’ve been perusing too many sale bins and ended up with some less than desireable stash enhancement?

  20. This is my deciphering…..
    A lady wants to make her friend green striped socks for her birthday, but wants to know how many balls of yarn she needs for plus size socks, don’t Tell Sandra, its a secret, Lisa Emre to check it out and get back to me.
    Huh? Huh? Whadda ya’ think?

  21. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    Ask if green yarn comes in striping pattern. Don’t talk slowly (that way you can go to dinner sooner). Consult the llama about the check.
    Colorless green ideas sleep furiously.

  22. Yarn, chocolate, mysterious and indecipherable notes to self: sounds like a marvelous trip. Enjoy your time at home! So, ummmm, when are you coming to NY? Sorry to be a nag, but we’re going through a little withdrawl, ESPECIALLY since you were here to do promo but none (well, very few) of us got to see you.

  23. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    “grenyrn ask striping plus”
    You are reminding yourself to ask your green yarn to stripe particulary nicely in your next pair of socks
    “don’t ts”
    Don’t take shit. If your green yarn mouths back to you about wanting to do any of that “pooling” or “flashing” garbage, let ’em have it. You do not take shit from your sock yarn, and will be pleased with nothing less than striping!
    “L.mre check”
    Obviously means “Let Starmore check.” That period should have been a *, obviously. As Ms. Starmore is such a genius when it comes to all things knitting, she is the final say in the sufficiency of the striping in your green sock yarn. You will have striping green sock yarn. You will take no shit from the yarn, no matter how much it wants to complain. And Alice Starmore will be the final judge in whether the yarn complied to your needs and wishes.
    Well, that was obvious. Got any others? 😉

  24. Dunkin Donuts is JUST down the street. You should’a shouted at someone, because one of us would have cheerfully run to the DnD for a cup of joe for you. Heck, we’ve even got a coffee maker in the store, with coffee right beside it!
    I’m not even going to guess at the note.

  25. ok, let’s break this down:
    1) grenyrn – at first I would tend toward this meaning Green Yarn, but it could mean Grey Knee Ran, which is clearly what happens when you get a run in grey knee socks….
    2) ask striping – ok, clearly, you meant Ask Stripping, as in the scanitly clad hunk up on stage.
    3) plus – don’t ts. – this obviously means that you were reminding yourself not to Tip your Server.
    4) L.mre – mre –> Mr. E –> Mystery. L.mre check – you’re reminding yourself to check out the lime mystery. Apparently they had no limes for the Coronas.

  26. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    You are wanting to hoard all this green yarn you found. You asked about the striping pattern, and found it adds a major plus to any project worked with it. So you tell yourself, don’t tell the story of where you found it. And then you tell yourself to lose the memory so you won’t end up telling everyone. And check, now it’s lost. Along with the yarn you tried to hide for yourself.

  27. I’m most intrigued by the “plus”. While waiting in line, I saw the people from the publishing company with big baskets of yarn at WEBS. Was it for you or them? And was there any “striping plus” green yarn? Or “striping plus -don’t ts” green yarn?

  28. grenym ask striping plus. -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    Graeme to ask about the extra striping wool. Don’t take some. The mysterious L. will check for more.
    (Okay, I like “don’t tell sock” better. But I want that sock yarn too!) Stephanie, I know Pitman shorthand at 150 words per minute. It may come in handy for you too!!

  29. Since I can rarely read my notes because of my handwriting, I have taken to calling myself and leaving voice mail. Something to think about.
    Here are my suggestions – good luck.
    grenyrn = green yarn
    ask = look up the information
    striping = bad dye lot, any way to fix?
    plus – = plus or minus color
    don’t ts = do not tear or staple
    L. = (someone’s name?)
    mre = (where L. lives)
    check = check ok

  30. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    hmmm….well if you’re anything like me…it has absolutely nothing to do with what you’d expect. i’d say… you need to check on the striping pattern on green yarn, but don’t tell your love or mother who paid the check.
    maybe it just means pta meeting on friday

  31. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.”
    You said BEST…not correct right? It looks to me like
    Gwendlyn asked about stripping. Plus ($$) Don’t tease though….let me check into it!
    HA! You never know WHAT you were thinking being so tired (wink wink)

  32. Stephanie— This is all Finnish !!! You’ve been knitting from Finnish patterns so feverishly that now the language has taken over your mind when you write notes to yourself.Just grab all the Finnish to English translations you have stshed away ( some place ) and ” Voila” you have it made !!!
    This post is a HOOT good Luck

  33. Insight into the minds of others comes much more easily after a few drinks. I’ll have to get back to you.

  34. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Well this is obviously a poorly written note by your alter ego the Yarn Harlot who wants to ask about getting green yarn for stripping plus DON’T TELL Stephanie! Loads more ($$$ in the payment) check.
    Ok – that was bad, but I too am suffering from lack of sleep. My only excuse. Hope you remember because now you have thousands of us wanting to know. 🙂

  35. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Does WEBS have Green Mountain Spinnery sock yarn? If it’s self striping, cool. Don’t think so? Let me check?
    in ANY case, just be happy you didn’t get a tattoo of green self-striping socks anywhere on your person, given the trip high. 😉
    Glad to see you at WEBS! Too bad that girl kicked the mike box and scared you silly. 🙂 It was great to hear you in person. 🙂

  36. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Like every photography student, I know that there are gremlins in the darkroom. Apparently, there are also gremlins in your stash, and they are asking about how to make stripes. (They’ve clearly learned to knit by now. Are you missing any knitting books?) “-don’t ts” is reminding you not to throw sock yarn at them, as they will just keep it. And “L.mre check” means that you’re going to let someone else (who you abbreviate as “mre”, Mr.E?) check up on them, as the gremlins will just bug you more if you give in to their questioning.
    Really, Stephanie, I would have thought that the note was perfectly clear as it was.

  37. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    You have a horrible green self stripping yarn somewhere deep in your stash that someone asked about. Seeing as how you care deeply about how said person feels, but they have horrible taste in colors so reminded yourself not to tease them, and told them you would check in your stash and try to find it to send it to them?

  38. green yarn accents stripping pole–don’t strip tease in lemon check
    Sounds like a fun trip! Wish I lived in Boston.

  39. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check
    grenyrn — green yarn
    ask — if they have any
    striping — the solution if they do NOT have any more of the particular green yarn
    plus — okay, if there are stripes, you will need MORE yarn to make sure that the stripes work out
    -don’t ts — don’t three-stripe — murkiness in code at this point in the message but all the rest of the message points to two stripes
    L.mre — L. is obviously Lupine, an alternate color, and mre is more. You know, for the other stripes.
    check — check the stash
    I think that you did need coffee, or at least a larger piece of paper.

  40. green yarn accents stripping pole–don’t strip tease in lemon check
    Sounds like a fun trip! Wish I lived in Boston.

  41. don’t ts = don’t TINK SOCK, obviously, in spite of needing to ask about green stripes for it. Also, did you happen to write a check for any yarn purchases? Because I happen to think that mre = Must Remember to Enter check. As to that L, well, if one is delirious, one can make random marks that do look like letters. Perhaps it’s a feeble attempt at a star or asterisk to draw your attention to your reminder.

  42. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    my translation:
    “Grenyrn (the friendly invisible yarn gnome on my shoulder) asked me if sock striping makes his legs look plus sized. Don’t talk shit, I said, Let Mr. Etherknitter check”
    Mr Etherknitter should be medicated enough (due to leg injury) to see Grenyrn as well, which is why he could check.
    Glad you had fun – I understand you met some cyber-friends of mine – lucky you!

  43. Ask if the green yarn is striping. Don’t think so. Last MRE is done. (MRE=”meal ready to eat” in the U.S. armed forces).
    And if the last MRE is done, it must have been time to head home!

  44. Don’t know what you wrote means except that “check” will mean to “check up on or verify”. Since you are Canadian, if you meant payment of some sort you would have written “cheque”.

  45. The green yarn is asking to be striped in a “plus size” fashion, not in a “skinny girl with no hips way”….if this isn’t possible, please don’t say “tough shit” out loud because your mother is checking your blog.

  46. grenyrn = you YeaRN for a GREeNer lawn
    ask = you have a question as to why
    striping = the grass is an uneven color
    plus – = how much fertilizer should you use?
    don’t ts = DON’T Tell the Secret!
    L. = you’ve confided in Laurie
    mre = need to buy MoRE grass seed
    check = CHECK the color of the yard to make sure it’s suitable for the miniature sheep you purchased while on your book tour
    (But that’s just a guess.)

  47. The green yarn asked for more striping in its project– don’t taste the Stoli’s (cause if you have yarn talking to you, clearly you got into the Stoli or something similar and sometimes it doesn’t taste good). Left message re: Check (perhaps you forgot to pay the bar tab? Or the green yarn is going to pay you for more striping?)

  48. The monster Grenyrn, kin of Grendel (of Beowulf fame), threatens your sock yarn. The only way to avoid certain stash annihilation is to avoid ts eliot (and all modern literature, to be safe) and devote yourself to the study of Old English literature. Beware! The mysterious L. Mre will be checking in on you! Bonus points if you write your next book in Old English.

  49. I’m not even going to try! I thought I had it figured, but every time I reread it gets more obscure…except that “L.mre check” won’t do anything but “let me recheck” in my brain. Whatever. So nice to make it to one of your booktour stops. I want the Depends concession on the next one.

  50. You did not write this note. It is also very well written considering the fact that it was written by a ball of yarn. The yarn was trying to say �Your green yarn is asking for more stripes.� This was probably a French yarn and was not using the English word �plus� but the French word �plus.�
    The yarn continues with �Don�t leave me on the top shelf.� It must have been in a great hurry to get the note to you so it began to use abbreviations.
    It ends with �Listen to me, write a check.� You can just hear the desperation in its fibers!
    This is some amazing yarn. You must hurry back and buy it immediately.
    Laura in Grafton, MA.

  51. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    GREater New York RegioN asks if striping is a plus – don’t they see. Although why you would want to know if they love Mr. Ed is beyond me. Or is it a question of Livermore Labs testing to see if they can end the scourge of pooling yarns?

  52. Stephanie – did you make that note to yourself when you were touring the warehouse with Steve as a reminder about the 127 Print in Green that you wanted? A bag did go home with you.
    Sorry about the coffee delay – what was in the pot was sludge from earlier in the day. The coffee shop was mobbed with all of the non-knitters not in line waiting to meet you! Thanks for an awesome day!

  53. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    “green yarn” (some specific green yarn you were thinking of at the time)
    “ask striping plus”=ask about striping plus: patterning, pooling ??
    don’t ts=don’t tease
    l.mre=”let mare check” (do you know someone named “mare”?? and who would name their kid mare??)
    let mre=let me re-check.
    you were wearing a green poncho in some of the pictures, maybe someone asked you about that green yarn and about using striping yarn and you were going to re-check something.

  54. clearly, you wanted green yarn. self striping would be a plus. DO NOT TELL SPOUSE. (you didn’t tell him, did you?) let mr. e write the check, that way joe can’t prove a thing.

  55. Do you doodle when you are on the tele? That’s what this looks like to me. Perhaps you already had this conversation, asked what you needed to ask and discovered what you needed to discover. See, you crossed something off of your to-do list without doing anything!

  56. Ok, I’ve got it.
    “grenyrn ask striping plus”
    You need to ask for/about self striping green yarn, but not a small skein. A plus sized one because this is a major project.
    -don’t ts
    Don’t get “Top Soil Yarn.” We all know in a bin full of yarn, you gotta dig down to the bottom for the good stuff. Therefore, you need “Bottom Soil Yarn.”
    L.mre check
    It’s only a “little mere” amount of money. However, this is a purchase to remember. You must “write a check” and log it in your check book. You’ll always have the memory on paper.
    OR �L.mre check� Buying Bottom Soil yarn sometimes is a big decision and not one to take so lightly. You need to think about it but need to check if a “lot more� is available.
    Love your blog and your stories. Can�t wait until you come to Tallahassee!

  57. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.”
    “Need more chocolate”
    (Can’t see what was so difficult about it myself…)

  58. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    someone with the name/nickname/blog name GreenYarn asked then striping yarn was a good thing but not to tell because it was a secret. lots more to check.
    and i would like to thank you for being you and i just have to ask. what subliminal control do you have in this site and your books?!? i have this urge to knit socks! i HATE wearing socks, i hate my feet covered period. plus i live in Florida! but now i have a voice in my head saying “maybe you just never had the right socks” but thank you for making me laugh and letting me know maybe my stash isnt as out of control as i thought.

  59. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    I’m all with the others for the first bit being ‘Ask about the green yarn. Striping is a plus!’
    But don’t TS?
    I think that, in your travels you found yourself some MUSHers (Online Roleplayers). You got your character all set up, and they helpfully explained the terms and things you can do, and you carefully made the note that you should not have TinySex, or roleplayed online sex.
    Because…really. That would cut into knitting time. You even noted down some sort of ‘check’ roll of the virtual dice you could do should someone ask.
    No TS for you!

  60. Oh, I get it! Grenyrn really means “Granny, RN”. Clearly, your grandmother (who is a nurse) asked about getting a job in a striptease joint for plus-sized performers. Her employers told her that if she did not tease the clients, they would leave more money in her paycheck. (Isn’t this right? I thought about trying to come up with something funny, but when I realized what it really meant, I felt I should let you know.)

  61. Sounds to me like you are going to make green socks for someone with fat ankles and you want to know if the striping pattern will still work. And you are going to check with some French Canadian named L’mere to check.

  62. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check
    This is definitely a plea from green yarn in your stash. Striping is actually a typo, as this yarn yearns to do some stripping, it’s so desperate to be used. This is a large skein, begging for a project and your attention….and you answer, “don’t think so” with an evil cackle. Without this new project you can indeed Leave More Checks at future yarn stores without pinching the budget too badly.

  63. Striping might refer to a self-striping yarn.
    Striping Plus is a Texas based company that handles parking lot striping and painting. That’s not likely it.
    grenyrn is obviously the person who asked the question.
    L.mre check = Let me recheck?
    Alternatively this is a coded message the Spectrans have tricked you into smuggling across the border. Green-garbed fighters who can’t hit the broad side of a guy wearing a bright white cape will attempt to sneak into your house and reclaim it. Don’t worry. They’re inept. They won’t find the right house, but instead stumble into a herd of sheep, see all the wool and figure that must be the place. Rather than find the message that says to steal all the world’s refined sugar, thus causing wide-spead panic and riots, they’ll swipe someone’s recipe for fruit cake, and in so doing, make the world a safer place. Or at least a bit safer from fruit cake, which we all know is a weapon being unleashed upon the earth by evil extra-terrestrials.

  64. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    You’re looking for green sock yarn – green self-striping yarn would be a plus… don’t tell Samantha? Or Sue, Or Sandy, Or Sherry… or anyone else you might be knitting for whose names starts with an S (let’s hope they don’t read blog comments, lol).
    Lots more places to check?
    Good luck decoding, and sleep well! =)

  65. “Grenyrn” must have been Welsh. Do you remember any knitters who mentioned a special affection for St. David or Dylan Thomas?

  66. Come now, Stephanie. It’s all very clear:
    “The green yarn asks for more striping and to be worn with snappy slip-ons [don’t tie shoes]. Left foot, more than the right, would also consider a check or houndstooth pattern in place of the striping.”

  67. This obviously meant that you were tired and board. It probably meant that you had to stay awake in some cab somewhere and had a pencil in your hand. So, because you were knitting off a chart and it was too dark to see in the cab, you could not knit. You decided to see what words you could form with your pencil in your mouth. you actually meant to write about how much you enjoyed Boston.
    Clearly, your writing skills with your mouth need a bit of improvement.

  68. are you sure it doesn’t have something to do with the da vinci code? I mean, you could be on some quest for the holy grail of yarn and not even know it.

  69. Translation – –
    Do I have anymore of the green striping yarn? Will check stash – but I don’t think so (meaning – don’t have any more of that particular yarn).
    Stephanie – did you make any green striped sox lately?? If so – what yarn did you use? Could it have been the green striped yarn from Julia – Vesper sock yarn – in Pitts. Pa?

  70. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check
    Often I write illegible notes to myself. I’m guessing that you’re actually misreading the last few “letters” but here’s my guess:
    Definitely talking about Green Yarn, asking about the striping effects, but here the “don’t ts” is just your scrambled brain clearly talking about DONUTS — probably the Dunkin’ Donuts. L.mre check probably doesn’t really say that.
    so it is a “to do” list:- ask about the striping effects of that green yarn, (get) DONUTS, and they’ll check for Lime Green yarn.
    Hope you can figure it out – or that it wasn’t important!

  71. While giving one of your talks some one asked a question and, knowing your own tiredness, you jotted down the question so that you made sure you didn’t just ramble on in front of the crowd without answering the question at all.
    In your shorthand (made more difficult as you tried to hold the sock in your other hand) you scribbled: “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Basically, a woman with Green Yarn asked about either problems with striping yarns or about stripping down to your undies in hotels, PLUS asked how you still manage to not TAKE theses things SERIOUSLY.
    You then wrote breifly what you thought would be a good response–> LAUGHT and know MORE is surely to come.
    After giving the answer and having the desired response you wrote “CHECK” to show the task had been completed.
    So basically:
    “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.” =
    Green Yarn asks about Stripping plus how you don’t take serious. Laugh. More to come…Check

  72. I also find myself exhausted today, which puts me in just the right mental state to decode this for you.
    grenyrn ask striping plus
    You saw a green yarn that you know also comes with a rare, coveted striping plus feature. You would like to ask the salespeople if they carry the version with this feature.
    -don’t ts.
    When asking the salespeople about it, don’t take shit – make sure they give you the striping plus yarn, goshdarnit!
    L.mre check.
    L stands for left and mre is really Mr. E, MYSTERY. The striping plus yarn produces a left-leaning check pattern when you knit it up, but it is a MYSTERY to you how they make do that.
    Yup, that’s totally what it means.

  73. The green yarn was asking you about striping. It wants to be self striping. The plus, well, of course it wants to be a thicker stripe than the other colors in the yarn. Don’t ts means don’t top sock- maybe the yarn is shy? It doesn’t want to be the top color on the cuff. L.mre check is a ‘typo’ that means let me check. You wrote that to remind yourself to do the maths to see how long the stripes needed to be, etc. for the yarn to be self-striping.
    Check out my new blog! http://knitpurlfrog.blogspot.com/

  74. Grens is a region in the district of Nylon in the canton of Vaud, Switzerland. Your quick and nimble mind was obviously pondering the workings of a sock yarn, and you thought, “Nylo…Grens!” (Sometimes the mind flows freer when on a lack of sleep and too much yarn stimulation.) You were pondering why nylon is usually 25% in sock yarn and wanted to ask someone about it, someone like the queen of socks, Nancy Bush. While you were talking to her, you also wanted to make sure you asked her whether she likes solid or striped socks best. After all, she’s Nancy Bush. You made a note to yourself to not “ts”, or tourette’s syndrome in the middle of a talk and scare all the nice knitters around you. “L” is the roman numeral standing for 50, relating to 50 hours of sleep you wanted to have, straight, when you arrived home. Finally, you were pretty sick of working and were exhausted from the entire tour, and made a note to look into getting MRE, or Meals, Ready-to-Eat for your family for the next few days so you didn’t have to cook.

  75. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Okay, see, you were /really/ tired when you wrote this, and so made a few spelling errors along the way….
    “grenyrn” = “green yarn” (I don’t know which green yarn, but I bet it’s pretty. And, based on the next bit, I bet it’s variegated, too.)
    “ask striping plus” = “ask about striping, pools” (You want to know if it stripes or pools, but really misspelled “pools” as “plus”.)
    “-don’t ts.” = “Don’t stress about it.” (Okay, you were really really tired and completely bollocksed up “stress”, but it’s an easy mistake to make, really. And you were taking the “don’t stress” advice to heart and not stressing about spelling at this point in time either.)
    “L.mer check” = “Let Mer check” (Whoever Mer is, they’ve got experience with this yarn and are going to check it out and contact you with the info.)
    There you go. Hope you get lots of rest today, enjoy some of that chocolate, and can tell us more about all your adventures tomorrow!

  76. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    Okay. This, honestly, is in Yarnian. It’s close linguistically to Knitterese, with a few more grammar rules and an occasional accent or tilde.
    It basically translates to “enough of the east coast and all its greenery. It’s time to hit the road to the desert southwest (where one can find cars and trucks with “desert pinstriping”). There I can check on the truly nutty people who choose to knit with wool in an area that rarely sees temperatures below 40F. I must check on flights – and bring the children – it’s not everyday one can see a scorpion and a javelina in a suburban housing development. Never mind the coyotes.”
    You’ll note that Yarnian seems similar to stenographer type in it’s effeciency when compared to English.
    ~amey (KS) – clearly deranged from baking cheesecake when it’s over 80F outside

  77. for me “ts” always means “transsexual”. eh. yeah. if it’s the green yarn that is not trans or if it’s some secret person in massachusetts called l.mre who isn’t – who knows?
    i’m clearly not witty enough to play this game.
    “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”

  78. Obviously, this note got stuck to the bottom of your shoe and not finding a trash receptacle you jammed it in your pocket for later disposal.

  79. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Green Yarn, if available in self striping, it would be a plus. Don’t tell the stash (it might be jealous). Or, maybe don’t tell Sam (a present?) Have Lisa Marie check (as in to see if it’s available in the back, maybe you wanted to blog about her if she found it?)

  80. I wonder if in my library frame of mind I accidently found your note out. I’m a bit giddy with excitement, so here goes:
    Did you know that there’s this business–in Boston!–called Greenyarn? (http://www.greenyarn.com/) Guess what they do? They. Knit. Socks. Out of eco-friendly materials, no less, like bamboo. You want some of these, don’t you? In plus sizes But only as it makes it easier to figure out their construction (of course!), and until you do (they don’t come in strips or stripes, btw), you don’t want to Tell the Stash–no unloved stash in your house! Really, you’ll need Loads MoRE checks to afford them, though, and that was your reality check.
    It could happen…

  81. Sounded like Greek to me, so I went to Babelfish, typed in:
    grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    And selected Greek to English. It gave me back:
    grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    Well, pfffththththttthhhh. Apparently the Greeks didn’t knit.

  82. OMG, I just saw that they have a sock called “short plus.” And they’re striped. Or striped. Or something.

  83. I think it means not to use temperature-sensitive yarn for the stripes. They might change color to an unfortunate pair/set, or stop working as yarn if you get them to the wrong temperature.

  84. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    You wrote in cryptic French! (Happens to me when I’m too tired to sleep): You asked a NY nurse how to handle the side effects of traveling while tired – you warned yourself not to translate this, lest others become aware that you’re going to have a check-up when you FINALLY get to Larramie, Wyoming on a book tour!
    * Gre – meaning “would you have the kindness”
    as in: Avoir du gre
    * Ny – New York, of course (you forgot you were in Boston!)
    * rn – Nurse
    Ask striping – should have moved the spacing over one: asks triping – You wanted to ask her about the long-term effects of traveling when tired.
    don’t ts. Don’t translate this
    L.mre check – You need a check-up when you get to Larramie Wyoming!

  85. If using the traditional code-breaking tools, this note reads, “Where the heck’s my coffee?!?”

  86. Maybe the last part could read “L.M. re: check”? You need to ask someone whose intials are LM about a check?
    Or something.

  87. “.kcehc erm.L .st t�nod- sulp gnipirts ksa nrynerg”
    hmm… written backwards, perhaps you were so tired you began channelling Finnish knitting notation?

  88. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.”
    ok…if I haven’t lost my job because of laughing hysterically at all the comments, I’ll add mine.
    I agree with the green yarn with possible striping ..plus, don’t tease. The mother will check (and she’s French cause somehow I think L’mere is the mother in French) Don’t tease her mother and she’ll find out about the yarn. Now all you have to do is figure out whose mother it is

  89. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.”
    Hmmm. My guess is you were slurring even in your brain:
    Gwendolyn asked you about striping and didn’t want you to…. erhm, ‘talk-sh*t’. So you wrote ‘Let me check’. After all, the R key and E key are next to eachother on the keyboard – perhaps your brain combined them too?
    just a thought.

  90. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    You don’t remember what it means because you didn’t write it. You were obviously taken over temporarily (?) by a space alien who wanted to send a message to Grenyrn, knowing that you would post this odd phrase on your blog (which is read throughout the galaxy).

  91. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    I think it is clear: a burlesque performer (the note should have read stripping, not striping, but, alas, that’s the downfall of shorthand) asked you to recommend some green yarn out of which to construct a costume for the Dance of the Unravelling Sweater. Plus, (no teasing, now, this is a serious request) when you find said yarn, leave a message re: a check, and payment will promptly be sent. (The problem here is that there is no phone number to leave a message nor an address to send the yarn, so maybe that’s not it…)

  92. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    I think “grenyrn” is a blogger’s nickname…maybe someone (this mysterious blogger named grenyrn) asked you about how to go about making self-striping yarn stripe appropriately for plus-sized feet. “-don’t ts.” is interesting…it’s got to be a warning to yourself, not a reminder you’re meant to pass on to another knitter. Maybe it’s “don’t turn sideways?”
    “L.more check” is easy–you must have confused your “L” with the number 1, and you were reminding yourself that you’d written yet “one more check” to pay for your latest yarn purchases.
    This post made me laugh because I once fell asleep (well, okay, more than once) in my Business Statistics class in undergrad, and on one occasion woke up to find I had “taken notes” on what happened in the dream I’d had! It was something to do with children playing on a playground…not quite what the prof discussed!

  93. No clue but had a fabulous time at the Clarion /WEBS. Thanks for brightening the Massachusetts sky on Saturday. We won’t mention the Red Sox / Blue Jay square off!

  94. I thought I was being so clever coming up with this one but others have obviously been very analytical and creative! Despite my spontanious simplicity, here goes!
    ……Gremlin yarn asks for you to do striping plus.Just don’t tease the lemur about his checks…..
    Tell that wonder publicist to set some Canadian dates and quick!

  95. I have no idea, but “Grenyrn” sounds like something I’d name my children. I might even have another child if I could name it something that was the Welsh equivalent of sock wool…

  96. “Green yarn ask for striping, plus don’t take any s***. L(someone named L), check for more.
    That was fun! You should have incoherent thoughts more often! Just kidding! Glad your travels were safe.

  97. You must’ve forgotten that you met a leprechaun named Grenyrn who charmed you with tales of mystical sock yarn — the colors never pool in funny ways around the heels. So you wanted to ask Grenyrn about where to get this magical striping yarn. (grenyrn ask striping plus)
    Of course, you figured you shouldn’t get on his bad side and tease Grenyrn for being of “faerie folk” and made a note to yourself: “don’t ts.”
    Alas, by then, Grenyrn had disappear’d and you wanted to make sure you could find more leprechauns. (L.mre) And you’d google it later. (check.)
    It’s a good thing you managed to write down what you did, because clearly once Grenyrn’s magical presence wore off with his disappearance, the memory of the encounter dissipated as if it were but a dream.

  98. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    I think it was short hand for a conversation you were having with some sock yarn that thought it was too boring without stripes.
    “the green yarn asked if it could have some stripes, don’t talk silly. Leave Mr. e a check for the green yarn that wants stripes.”

  99. My suggestion would be that you were looking for
    “green yarn, ask for striping plus , don’t test, let Mary check . The words between the <>s are the words you left out of your abbreviated shorthand. Actually this looks a lot like the kind of business notes I used to take in conferences. Totally coded for others, but perfect sense for me (usually). Hope this helps.

  100. So. I had my drink. I sat down, slowed my breathing and brought myself to a meditative state wherein I could gain insight into the workings of your mind and help you solve this problem.
    I succeeded in gaining access. But before I could get to the root of the message, random thoughts about licking yaks and veterinary college dental experiments and other things involving fun fur that are too frightening to discuss in public were hurling themselves at me. The horror. THE HORROR…
    I’m still trembling. Let us never speak of this again.

  101. Oh good grief! When I posted my previous message, it left out my parenthesis marks that I used. Just ignore the second sentence of my message, okay?

  102. I must admit that I’m clueless about your cryptic message, although you could be looking at a new career in your country’s Secret Service. I’m just charmed by how casually you threw in the reference to T.S. Eliot. This blog is delicious all by itself, but the little extras you gift us with are truly the icing on the cake. I may want to be you when I grow up.

  103. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Don’t talk smack about the non-striping green yarn? And let Marie (poor Marie…though if she’s poor she probably won’t) pick up the check? Either that or you’re coming up with your own code and launching a knitting-oriented personals site. “grenyrn seeking complimentary heel/toe colors. Striping plus, but lack thereof won’t terminate potential sexy good sock fetish times. Let’s find l’amour over the check!” Or some such thing.
    Some days, there is not enough coffee in the world to make me make sense outside my own head.

  104. Ok, green yarn, we got that. Ask if it is striping, plus – the plus part was the exhaustion rambling, just ignore that. Don’t think so. The last part, though is obvious – Laurie (or Lene) has suggested MREs – you know, meals-ready-to-eat, the army food, that self-heats. For the long air trips and so you don’t have to leave your hotel room. Check on that. Will they let you take it in your carry-on, etc. Duh.

  105. This is such a Seinfeld episode! Did you see it? Jerry writes a joke in the middle of the night and can’t read his handwriting… thus the plot unfolds. When at the end it is deciphered, the joke is not even funny. A show about nothing. I loved it.
    As for your mystery, I say add it to the top of a pile of stuff (patterns, or bills t/b paid, or children’s schoolwork). If by the time you find it again it is unresolved, it is unimportant and throw it out… at least this is how I deal with the lot of the ts in my life.

  106. It’s obviously a note to yourself to check on the green striping yarn that you don’t want to toss out! Makes total sense…or at least it does to me…I think maybe it’s time I knit something other than socks for awhile.

  107. grnyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check
    My incredible psychic powers tell me that “grnyrn” is the email name for a nurse (RN) from Greenwich Village (GR) in New York City (NY). Or, she could be a grandma (GR) who is a nurse anywhere in New York state.
    If your handwriting is as bad as mine, the “ask” after “grnyrn” might actually be “aol.”
    Maybe it is grnyrn@aol.
    Seems that she wanted to know if striping was a good idea for plus sizes and you don’t think so. Or, maybe you wanted to remind yourself to ask HER something about striping — maybe a variegated yarn striping where is was not supposed to.
    L.mre check either may mean to check on a dye Lot bearing the abbreviation “mre.”
    But it could also mean, “Luigi made ravioli early,” “lost my rent check,” or “Louisiana MRE check” — but please don’t write a check to donate any more MRE’s, we have had quite enough, thank you very much.

  108. I can’t honestly address most of this cryptic reminder, only the ‘plus – don’t ts’ part, as I’m currently working on a sock that has a point where it would seem natural to Turn the Sock, but you don’t….you just keep knitting around…
    Now, quit thinking about it. Either it’ll come to you, or it won’t matter, or something horrific will happen as a consequence of inaction on your part due to your inability to figure out what you meant and THEN you’ll understand it.
    It’s just a matter of time.

  109. Gwyndolyn asked you about stripped sock you did Also you don’t need to check on “it” because L.M. is going to do that for you.
    By the way I bought your book “At Knit’s End” last night. you are so cool. My lovely children swear that I am that lady in line in front of you at the bank, the one with the eye twitch.

  110. Grenyrn is obviously a name from harry Potter. Perhaps a House Elf. You were leaving yourself a note to ask your House Elf Grenyrn to procure green yarn (self-striping would be a plus) (note: I recommend Fortissima Colori 3001 – see picture here: http://knitterlythings.com/blog/?p=31 ). Then a note not to tease your House Elf. And finally, Grenyrn should check on the possibility of la amore (presumably with Joe, but the note is brief) when you returned home.

  111. Well, if your husband is anything like mine, you were devising a plan to cover your extravagent stash enhancement binge. It is clearly a ransom note to your husband to prove that the stores held you hostage until you bought several hanks of green striping yarn (and you weren’t supposed to ask why it was striping, and then told you not to tell steve, who was the yarn shop security person. So you left ‘Mr. E.’ a large check in exchange for your life.
    Your secret is safe with me.

  112. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    Green yarn, a slip knot, striping; plus – don’t tickle Sneetches, (they) laugh at more checks.
    I have no clue…I am obviously NO help in this situation!! Heehee.

  113. I’m so envious. Waking up with no memory of what you were doing, but a lot of extra chocolate and yarn in your suitcase? I should have such problems.
    “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Regarding the green yarn – is it supposed to make that stripey pattern? – I didn’t test it – I should check whether or not I have Lots More.

  114. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check
    If I wrote L.mre check, it would mean to me either “leave message re: check,” or “left message re: check.” Does someone owe you money, or do you owe someone money?
    Could “grenyrn” stand for “Grafton Yarn,” since that’s on your tour?
    Don’t ts…all I can come up with is, “Don’t talk shop.” Hardly seems likely, however.

  115. I’m guessing Rams wins, but here’s something she missed. “L.mre” is shorthand for Elmore, the man with whom you play long-distance chess, and you are reminding yourself of your next move – check! (Let’s see you wriggle out of that one, Elmore!)

  116. I think it means when you were delirious some green yarn asked you about stripping (you just spelled it wrong)and you said don’t tease, let me recheck

  117. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    “green yarn, ask about striping plus – dont’ twist stitches. Let Marie check.”
    send along the green,i love green, sock yarn and i’ll check to see if it stripes and i won’t twist any stitches.
    now i’m going back to read the responses

  118. It is a little known fact that grenyrns are a type of yarn gremlin that populate the Boston area (I think they like the chowder). They try to catch knitters unaware and wheedle their yarn away from them by whining like a pack of 13 yr old girls. In your case it obviously tried to take advantage of your delirious condition and even asked for some self-striping yarn plus whatever else you were carrying. You can just shoo a grenyrn away as long as you don’t touch its skin (TS). Apparently you are also reminding yourself to check that you did not give in to the grenyrns whining (l.mre check = let me check).
    I hope you are not missing any yarn!

  119. I say that it means she wanted to ask about the Striping plus greenyarn, she is very excited about this yarn and doesn’t want the yarn store personnel to tease her about it. Lemore is going to check on this for her.

  120. Grenyrn, a distant relative of Grendel, was considering whether striping would make her look larger. Your thought, you don’t think so. Then you remembered the check you received from l’amour, your secret lover, and noted that down so that you’d remember to deposit it in the morning.

  121. You made yourself A note not to forget your Green Striping yarn, Plus you dont … somthing with a Twist stitches, since the pattern changed. And you only have one( 1, it COULD look like an L) more check to do around the room to look for your green yarn.
    Someone you met on your Tour, named Grenyrn or somthing of the sort, asked you about self striping yarn and how it looks when you do this or that. You told her(him) not to twist stitches And you went to check up on it, so (s)he gave you her blog to contact her. and her blog starts with an L, and its at .mre
    This accutally happens to me all the time, as my handwriting is so horrible, and I dont finish my thoughts.

  122. I really don’t know about those “canadian” words and stuff, but clearly it means “Spend more time with Sandy next time in Massachusetts”.
    nod and xo

  123. I’m with Michelle. I think it all boils down to that PTA meeting you have on Friday.

  124. I suggest drinking copious amounts of Tim Horton’s coffee which is of course, far superior to Dunkin Donut’s coffee. Once said delicacy has been ingested, I’m sure all manner of cryptic notes will be decipherable. Since I (sadly) have not been party to any of your shopping..er book tours, I can’t provide any further help.

  125. Another boring hotel room snuck the note in retribution for the “You so totally stink” noise you made when entering it; you learned the eloquent sound from a teenager in your household. Had you rolled your eyes, it would have popped all the caps on your toiletries and left them to bleed their sudsy guts all over the insides of your suitcase.
    That’s one bitter hotel room.

  126. HMMM…
    “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    “Stripping with green yarn, don’t tell Sam. Loud Mr E. gave check”

  127. Green y[oung] r[ich] [N]eptunians stripping. Plus, fun to watch! don’t t[ry] s[ex] though, L[ast] m[ating] r[itual] e[nded] badly. Check for alien babies later.

  128. Let us knit then, you and I,
    When the yarn is spread out against the sky
    Like an afghan on an old couch.
    Let us go, through loops of string
    No more abandoned to the stash.
    grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. *
    *Addled Canadian: “Ask L.mre, a yarn store, about green striping plus yarn that I should not tear or staple.”
    * * * *
    Greetings from a new reader and relatively new knitter! Saw your book in Barnes and Noble the other day and got very excited. (When are you coming to Texas? I kid, I kid.)

  129. I have no idea what your note means, but Susan’s comment made me bust out laughing (and then I had to try to explain why to my non-knitting husband, who asked me if it was “one of those knitting things.” Still, he did laugh when he finally understood it.) Lara’s answer also made me giggle.
    And I’m so glad Brianna Flynn beat me to explaining what I’m thinking when I see “don’t TS.” Too much time spent online, obviously. 😉

  130. “Grnyrn” must be the name of a woman out of King Arthur or something. Like Guinevere or Gwyneth or
    … Grnyrn. So just retrace your steps and ask the lovely and mysterious Lady Grnyrn to decipher the rest.

  131. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check
    I think you were drinking with other knitters when you wrote this, but were trying not to offend someone if they saw your “note to self”. The “don’t” refers to seeing some other knitter’s ugly green yarn with stripes and the “ts” stands for
    “that sucks”. About the rest – I think you owe someone some money for all the booze you drank OR maybe they owe you, not sure. Cheers!

  132. It just means that Grenyrn asked about how to used stripes to her advantage on garments and asked you not to Tell a Soul. So you said you’d personally (and discreetly) check and get back to her ’cause you’re brain is not functioning at the moment.
    Unfortunately, not remembering what your hastily scribbled note means come morning, you posted it on your blog, revealing to the whole world what Grenyrn asked, and even asking for help deciphering it.
    Now, within 48hrs, thousands know about it. I hope Grenyrn is a very forgiving person.

  133. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Maybe you inverted some letters (I know my handwrting and spelling worsen on lack of sleep)? “don’t ts” = “doesn’t stripe”? “L.mre check” = “lemme check”?
    Dunno. Maybe next time you should have someone else write your note for you 😉

  134. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Maybe you inverted some letters (I know my handwrting and spelling worsen on lack of sleep)? “don’t ts” = “doesn’t stripe”? “L.mre check” = “lemme check”?
    Dunno. Maybe next time you should have someone else write your note for you 😉

  135. Steph – clearly this means (G)ive (Re)gina (N)ew (Y)a(rn)…(a) (sk)ein of (striping)sock yarn (plus) my generic pattern..but don’t worry. I have it in your new book.
    Don’t ts clearly means Don’t tell Samantha – she probably wants the yarn and the pattern. L.mre-check obviously means Let me recheck her address so I can send her the yarn. Silly girl. How could you not remember writing that down?

  136. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    I think this was you recording your tiredness/deliriousness. Some green yarn was talking to you, asking how to add striping to a sweater without using the letter t. The second part is you asking yourself to check your sanity.
    Best I could do… that’s some crazy note.

  137. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Obviously written under duress, the literal translation is:
    Grenyrn = Greasy nymphs run
    Ask = to question me about
    Striping= striping
    Plus= positives
    – = and
    don�t = negatives
    ts = while making toe socks
    l= large enough
    mre =for mutant reindeer
    check = from Czechoslovakia
    Which means that small, scantily clad women are frantically trying to come up with a slimming sock pattern. You see, for Christmas of 2006 Santa�s regular reindeer will be on holiday so their cousins from Czechoslovakia will be filling in. The said cousins are unusually large and have requested special footwear to help them appear as dainty as their northern cousins. The nymphs tasked with creating these socks have been working frantically without sleep for months and they are greasy from the lanolin in the wool. At some point on the tour they asked for pattern suggestions, perhaps using stripes for the desired effect.

  138. You could think about the note right before going to sleep and let your subconcious work on it. (I know, what sleep?) I’ve written stuff like this before during periods of heavy work. It is a bit alarming, like you may have turned into someone else and not noticed. Kinda looks like you’re overextended. Listen, we beg and whine for you to come to our town but really, you’ve got to look out for Number One. We can wait.

  139. green yarn, ask about striping minus the toe shaping?? last (need) more checks?????
    Now I think your readers are becoming as funny as you! (we are all working hard for you!)

  140. hmmm… maybe you meant to find a particular shade of green, striping would be a plus, don’t tease llamas…. because we all know that would be bad

  141. hmmm… maybe you meant to find a particular shade of green, striping would be a plus, don’t tease llamas…. because we all know that would be bad

  142. sorry… my cat walked on the keyboard right as I was trying to post… I guess he thought he was just trying to help me type…

  143. OK. I think it’s green yarn, striping is a plus. I’m not sure about the don’t ts. Maybe don’t toss And I use LM for “left message” or “leave message” at work. So Leave message re: check. Maybe someone asked you to look for striping green yarn and asked you to leave them a message on a bill/cost to send it to them.

  144. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    “grenyrn ask striping plus” obviously means that you and the green yarn have come to a watershed, a turning point in your relationship. No longer is the striping sufficient for the green yarn. It wants more, hence the “plus”.
    “Don’t ts” is either Don’t tell Sock or, more likely, Don’t Tell Shrink. I agree with this part of the sentence. Either would be disastrous.
    “L.mre check.” is more difficult, but it would seem to me that it would stand for Left Mammary Check. Look in your bra. Left-hand side. That’s where you stuffed the ball of green yarn.
    You’re welcome.

  145. I have a guess on the ACTUAL meaning (no where near as funny as the message-writing cat). I just read a blog, http://medstudentwhoknits.blogspot.com/2006/04/while-mice-are-away-cat-will-play.html#comments
    from a woman whom you met? might have met? last Friday. She talks about her cat winding green yarn about her house. The picture looks like the cat MIGHT have been setting it up for self-striping. I’m thinking you might not have wanted to tell the story until she’d had a chance to blog it.
    So–green yarn, could be self-striping, don’t tell story–let me re-check?

  146. Toooo intriguing!! You will tell us the answer when (if) you work it out won’t you!

  147. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Your computer hard disk was overloaded so you needed to solve it before you were able to post blog entries properly. Then in one book store during your tour you saw a book written by Walter Greiner (you misspelled it gerenyrn) which is called �Structure and dynamics of elementary matter� and you thought you should ask him more (plus) information about striping (In computers that use multiple hard disk systems, disk striping is the process of dividing a body of data into blocks and spreading the data blocks across) but not (don�t) consult the Technology source archives (ts) or check what the l�Mre (il Movimento dei Repubblicani Europei) know about it.

  148. Haha, no idea, but thanks for fixing the myblog-problem. Don’t even appologize that it took “so long”. I read your blog, I know how busy you are.

  149. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    TS is obviously tequila shooters. MRE stands for Meals-Ready-To-Eat in military-speak. L. is an initial, and probably the person has the same first and last name so you only used the one letter – so let’s assume Lyle Lovett or Lucy Lawless.
    I’m going to guess you were in the middle of writing a note about green striped sock yarn when you ran into Lyle Lovett or Lucy Lawless, did some tequila shooters, and then you decided to join the military. In all good campaigns, preparedness is important, so you started a supplies checklist. MRE? – Check!

  150. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.”
    This is your subconcious speaking to you; do not attempt to change the channel.
    All those past episodes of Star Trek (any version) are surfacing unbeknownst to you; they’re wooing you and telling you that ..it’s GREat that EnsYns RuN from ASsymilating Knitters; they do, however, like the STRIPING in the uniforms in PLUS sizes – the crotch binding isn’t very fun…but DON’T Tell Spock; his logic wouldn’t allow him to comprehend. Finally, the Last frontier warrants one MoRE CHECK before retiring, again, into the archives…
    Didn’t know you had it in ya, didja? Tease the trekkies, eh? hurmph.
    Have a lovely day, m’dear. The cinnamon soap lady from Loop … Ann

  151. I think you are chanelling TS Elliot…it sounds exactly like one of his poems.(And I personally LIKE TS Elliot) You may be on to something…a new career in modernist poetry. The first posthumous book of TS Elliot poetry as interpreted by a Canadian Knitter. It may be a whole new genre in books!

  152. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    Cloying green yarn,
    silently asking to be knit
    the striping effect
    an effervescent mental plus
    Do not be afraid
    tease the yarn into
    glorious sock o rific
    Languishing over my
    rescent project,
    I check the time
    and begin another
    . . . Yup, that’s definitely it!
    PS: I am loving the new book! It’s a gem!

  153. Hi Steph. Great to see you last weekend. Just following up on that question I asked you re that green striping sock yarn. Also please don�t tell my son about this as I�m making the socks as a surprise for him. Thanks for leaving me the message that you would check on it.

  154. CRAP……DON’T WHAT???? This must be a Harlot subliminal message for Me!!!
    I sign everything “ts”. (My initials)
    Harlot.. is this a coded message to me? Are there “Knitting Rules” Soimperative that you must communicate them to me in code?
    Or.. maybe you just can’t read your handwriting????
    (ummm I know this is possible by experience– NO ONE can read mine!)
    hoping you’ll update us-

  155. How about: “I was asked why the green in the yarn produces striping plus pooling in the major portion of the sock but doesn’t do so in the toe of the toe of sock. Told them to let me recheck.”
    Now the harder question: assuming that’s right, and assuming you figure it out, who were you going to tell when you had the answer?

  156. Give yourself a reasonable amount of time and if you can’t figure out what it’s about or it doesn’t come back to you, then forget about it. If you forgot something that involved somebody else, they’ll remind you when they figure out that you forgot.
    Meanwhile, you’re wasting precious knitting brain cells on this. Realign your priorities, friend!

  157. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check
    this OBVIOUSLY means;
    Don’t tell sister mary Laurent that you are asking grenyrn about zara plus self striping yarn!
    do you have a knitting nun friend? A JEALOUS knitting nun friend?

  158. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    There are *obviously* three thoughts here: Ask about the unusual green yarn since it is striping plus apparently enjoying the photoshoot of sock on foot (previous post). Don’t talk to Stewart (as in Martha.) And… lie more about the check (as in at the restaurant and expenses… need I say more?)

  159. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    I’m thinking that you noticed some green yarn (grenyrn) and you were going to ask if they had it in a striping colourway as well(ask striping plus). If they did have the aforementioned colourway don’t ts was your reminder not to get tossed from the shop as you bowled everyone over in order to get at said yarn. L.mre check = Lemme check (composure here, “lemme check if I can handle the answer…breathe…”).

  160. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check.
    You were interested in researching the striping pattern of the grunion (it’s a fish – but you were in a hurry, hence the spelling error), however you figured the pattern would be more pronounced on the plus-sized fish, and were prepared to get a closer look. Don’t Try Swimming after them, as they are fast little suckers, and we wouldn’t want you to get hurt in the process. Let Monsieur Re check on them, and he will get the data to you.
    Hmmm. Do tell what project you were researching this for…it sounds fascinating!

  161. You tryed french, rather poorly:
    Grenier sacs tr�s plein plus -don’t translate Laine m�re cache.
    In better french:
    Au grenier, des sacs tr�s plein (et plus -don’t translate) J’y ai cach� la laine de maman.
    Do you need the translation? Go check your grenier, you may find some nice old treasures.

  162. OK, I don’t know why you had it so muddled (who knows WHAT you could have been thinking at that point!), butwhat you were trying to tell yourself was: “Buy yarn at the green fields of Maryland Sheep & Wool. Plus, don’t tell sock.” Don’t know how you wrote “L.mre check” when you meant “sock will get too excited if it knows we’re going to MD”.

  163. You hide some rare vintage yarn treasure in the attic of your house, but as an attempt to hide the sad truth from your english-spoken readers, you tryed french, rather poorly:
    Grenier sacs tr�s plein plus -don’t translate Laine m�re cache.
    In better french:
    Au grenier, des sacs tr�s plein (et plus -don’t translate) J’y ai cach� la laine de maman.
    And now everybody is going to visit you, trying to figure out how to have a look at your attic without being noticed by anyone of your family. Go check your “grenier”, you may find some nice old treasures.

  164. While there are some amazingly artful and creative guesses above, it’s obvious to me that this was a note written to remind you to come to Kingston on your book tour.
    BTW – thanks for the bit in your book about how sock yarn doesn’t really count as stash or expenditure. I feel EXACTLY that way! I never (manage to) leave a yarn store without one. (it’s either an add-on, or payment for the touch therapy)

  165. I can never read anything I have handwritten, so I don’t know why I am even trying to guess what you may have noted, except that it’s fun. Here’s my best guess. You wrote yourself a note to check on some especially beautifulgreen yarn with striping and you want lots more or it (whether for yourself or for someone else…Who knows? Not I.)
    My weak, but still there, motherly instincts are pushing me to tell you to take better care of yourself! Get some rest! We’ll understand if you can’t blog for a few days.

  166. grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L. mre check.
    This is a hard one. Especially for a naturally sluggish mind, but, here goes…
    My new friend GRENYRN (blog name) ASKed at my favourite yarn store about using self STRIPING yarns for plus sizes, but, DON’T want to do a Toe-up Sock so Laurie/Lana/Lynn… will do a quick MemoiRE CHECK to see if I already blogged about it.
    Saw some fabulous GREen YaRN and it’s self-STRIPING what a PLUS!! -DON’T Try Spinning my own. It would be Loony to try, Mother E. tried, CHECK out her results!

  167. “Don’t Tourette’s Syndrome” in Switzerland gets my vote for sock yarn! It might have been a tie with the mutant reindeers in Czechoslovakia – but clearly the Czechoslovakia part makes the whole answer unbelievable.
    Don’t Tuesday Spin from Rams, of course, a beauty – and “don’t twist stitches” from Marie in Floria sounds like it could be right!
    And those who wrote poetry? Fantastic. I love these comments!

  168. Are you sure you weren’t in Las Vegas. What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. You Go Girl!!

  169. One more try: “Would it be a plus if the green yarn were self-striping? Don’t think so. Check to see if there’s more left.” It does appear that your overall mood at the moment you wrote this can be summed up as “dwn wth vwls!”
    But I must admit that I laughed out loud at the “It’s Finnish for ‘buy more yarn.'”

  170. I have no idea. But I do have this. It is titled “Man taking a message.” “Someone from the Gyna Colleges called. They said the Pabst Beer is fine. I thought you didn’t like beer?”

  171. Google has failed miserably in helping me decipher your note. I entered “Grenym” by mistake and was shocked to see Google’s response “suck on this spam-bots”. Perhaps you’re getting a lot of spam these days? As for my typing skills, I was nearly blind from reading over 190 comments about green yarn, transexuals and assorted poets.

  172. You can relax now. The message means absolutely nothing. I had a good friend plant it on you while you were in Boston. I have read enough of your work to know how your mind works and I knew you would have all of us help you try to decipher. I knew you would reward someone for it and was just hoping with all my heart that the reward you would choose would be sock yarn. You see, I just finished your latest book and I am dying to try socks. My creative idea truly should be awarded with the yarn. I am sorry if it caused you undue distress.

  173. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    You’re considering grenading any NY renter who makes the mistake of asking you about self-striping yarn. In addition, you aren’t going to tolerate them shouting at you. And finally, since you’ve abviously spent a lot of time at the military surplus store arming yourself in grenades, you’ve lost your check to pay for the MRE’s (Meals Ready to Eat) you intended to bring home to provide sustenance for the girls during your next book journey – which means you must really have been tired since I’m pretty sure you NOTBers (north of the borderers) specll “check” as “cheque”

  174. The sad truth is… you do not own a notebook of “notes to self.” Although the suitcase you brought home is clearly yours, the notebook belongs to someone else. The simple solution: Look inside the front cover to see WHO owns the mysterious notebook in question and return it as soon as possible…. certainly before there is any accidental ts-ing. (You would NOT want to be held responsible.)
    Now you can R-E-L-A-X….
    (and tell us how much money that Knitters without Borders has made during the tour so far!)

  175. All of my creative answers were already duplicated above–what wonderful fans you have!–so I will only offer this:
    Perhaps “ts” means “twist stitches.”

  176. How am i supposed to concentrate on studying physiology and pharmacologly and other ph-ing things when you’re book is so darn funny!!! On the bright side, if I don’t study, I’ll have much more knitting time… no- bad idea.

  177. “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check”
    Obviously – a GR (Gorgeous (or giant) Redhead) that you met en (in) NY – north part) was asking for willing supjects for washable striping tatoos of socks (PLUS- they are beautiful but not warm!). You got the tatoos and you must remember not to Take a Shower, or they will wash off …. and L(ast) but not least – remember to check to see if you can get them in a Lace design.

  178. I have found similar scribblings. Here goes:
    grenyrn: green yarn (obviously)
    ask striping plus: ask if comes in self-striping, would be a plus
    dont’ ts: don’t touch stash (now, why would anyone do that?!?)
    lmre check: one more check
    So, if we put that all together, we get:
    One more check for green yarn, ask if self-striping, such a bonus. Don’t touch stash!!

  179. I am about half way through the new Knitting Rules book — it’s funny, informative, and full of encouragement and great ideas. Unfortunately, it’s also rife with typos. Have all the world’s (professional) proofreaders died and gone to Heaven? Isn’t this what editors are paid to do? Sorry, but it’s pretty distracting to a careful reader to run across things like “This rule doesn’t not work for children…” (p. 118), and I like to see both t’s in “stitch”. Hope your publishers will give you better service on the next edition. Betsy from Orange, VA.

  180. I posted this, but I’m not sure you’ll read it attached to the May posting.
    “grenyrn ask striping plus -don’t ts. L.mre check. ”
    Here’s a theory, but it hinges on accuracy, and probably isn’t the “best.”
    It was April, shortly after earth day and being environmentally minded, you are interested in buying grenyrn (eco-friendly yarn). Self-striping would be a plus (bonus). You remind yourself not to ts (talk shop) and that you should l.mre (listen more). Maybe you wanted to check on the yarns.
    The bad news is that I don’t think any of the organic yarn manufacturers out there have dyed their yarns into self-striping yarns.
    Now here’s the good part:
    Multi-colored yarns that may or may not self-stripe:
    Sari Silk is 100% recycled, but I doubt it self-stripes.
    Organic yarns you could dye into self-striping yarn using natural dyes:
    Oasis makes a yarn out of soy.
    Blue-Sky Alpacas (possibly thick for socks) – this is the only one I’ve actually used.
    Bluefaced Leicester
    Pakucho Organic Peruvian Cotton
    Eco Wool
    Marr Haven
    Green Mountain Green (Green Mountain Spinnery)
    Posted by: Stephania Fregosi at May 10, 2006 10:31 PM

  181. Just sort of got redirected here by some other friends of mine, I’m helping out the guy who owns Greenyarn, the eco-fabric company out in Boston which was mentioned in the comments above.
    I bet they would be keen to drop you a sock sample. However from what I know their socks are machine made from some fanciful machine etc

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