Taxi blogging.

Taxibloging

Yeah. I’m writing this in a taxi. There’s no wireless in the cab, so I’ll post it when I can. (note: I didn’t find wireless until I got to the hotel tonight, so this post, though written in a taxi, was posted in the bathroom of the hotel, the only part of the room I can get signal in.)

Rushing again. I feel like I was only home long enough to take in a ball game (Jays 10, Yankees 5. The sock was thrilled. Me? I don’t play favourites.)

Takesockbg

Visit with Joe, arrange my life, do a little laundry and get back on a plane. Today I’m off to Boston, beginning the leg of the tour that will take me to The Boston Knitting guild, Porter Square books, Classic yarns of Grafton and WEBS. (The WEBS event is giving me the willies. I heard a rumour that they’ve moved it to a nearby hotel, so if you’re coming, check in to make sure you go to the right place. I think it’s talk at the hotel, then back to WEBS to buy yarn sign books.)

The last week or so has been so surreal that blogging from the back of a taxi seems normal. Even rational. Things started to get strange when I got a call from the people who run my life Storey Publishing telling me that when I got through with the event in Philadelphia, that I should make my way to NYC for a quick radio spot. Okey dokey I think. No problem. (Well, I mean, going on the radio is always a problem, it’s a terrifying chance to say foul things live to many people if you muck it up, but at least it doesn’t matter if your fly is down or your hair is bad.) The surreal part started when they told me that it was Martha Stewart Sirius Radio.

Martha? That Martha? Handmade gingerbread houses with delicate hand fashioned sugar windows Martha? Martha, the woman sent to this earth to remind me that I don’t iron enough? Martha? No thank you. I cannot speak to Martha Stewart. I am not worthy. I don’t own any matching towels and I burn cookies. I don’t accessorize myself, never mind my bedroom. I am not the sort of person to be anywhere near her. She wouldn’t like me.

I am reassured when they say that It’s Martha’s show, but Martha doesn’t host it. It’s a call-in show hosted by some very nice ladies who aren’t as scary as Martha. I decided to turn up.

Wheremris

That’s Martha radio. (Not the whole thing. Just part. The sock was still a little intimidated.) I made my way there at 7am (after arriving in NYC at 2am) without coffee, (I can’t stress enough the significance that this all happened before coffee…) convinced security that there was no practical difference between my name, Stephanie Pearl-McPhee and the name they had on the list “Stephanie Pearl-MacPhee” (Get out of my way. Martha’s people are waiting for me.) and straggled upstairs where they slapped a headset on me and told me not to be nervous.

First caller. A very nice lady who wasn’t scary at all. I start to relax. All I have to do is talk to knitters. I like knitters. I talk to knitters all the time. This is going to be ok. It’s going to be fine.

Next caller….MARTHA FREAKING STEWART.

I’ll give you a minute to cope. Goodness knows I needed one.

I said, and these three words are the last words that I remember before my brain disconnected itself from my mouth…

“Good morning Martha”

Just like that. Just like I wasn’t breaking blood vessels in my brain and hyperventilating. Just like a normal person would. Just like everything was ok. Then Martha was talking and my world was going black. She wanted to know about needles. I suddenly knew nothing. I answered anyway (probably a tactical error.) She wanted to know about wool. I babbled incoherently. She told me that you can’t knit in prison. You have to crochet because prison doesn’t allow knitting needles. I said something like “Sure, yeah. You could give someone a nasty poke with a knitting needle.” then I think I laughed. Probably like a hyena on speed. Martha laughed melodically. I though about strangling myself with the headset cord or stuffing my mouth with yarn. “A nasty poke?” Who says that? Who tells Martha that? Someone stop me.

The next thing I know Martha says I’ve inspired her to knit (She lies beautifully.) the producers are thanking me and saying they will have me back…(lies, lies, more lies) and I’m back on the Avenue of The Americas trying to put it all back together. and wondering in a dazed sort of way if I was ok, or at the very least stupid enough to be entertaining. I’m really smarter than that. Poke. Good grief.

It was a relief to get to School products and sit quietly with the yarn, move onto the next event. (PS. Despite what this knitter says, I did not bully her into buying yarn in the store. It is not my fault if she has no fibre resistance.)

Rutherford,

Ruthlib1

Ruthlib2

This is Stacey. See that yarn in front of her? She spun that with her own two hands. See that spindle with the maple leaf on the front? She gave me both of them. The yarn and the spindle. I am a very lucky knitter. I test drove the spindle that very night. It’s beautiful.

Queenofspin

This is Jana, Tracy, Erin and Chris. Not necessarily in that order. these ladies know how to co-ordinate a yarnesque road trip. (Chris is a crocheter. I leant her a sock for the picture so she wouldn’t feel left out.)

Whackknruth

Jersey knitter (who did a fabulous game of link-o-rama, as well as some slick reciprocal blogging) with Peony knits.

Rblogruth

Charming Trek was in attendance as was the engaging Mary Beth, I got to see Annie Modesitt. , after missing her while she was in Toronto for a trip, the knitters were everywhere at this event and I’ve got to tell you. The Rutherford Library runs a heck of a knitting party. There was Elizabeth, a very young knitter (I haven’t forgotten to send you that pattern) , there were the nice people who run Yarnart (They make some cool stuff. Meg is currently enamoured of the one with sequins in it.) and a good time was had by all. (Well, likely all. Definitely me.) I returned to NJ in a fine mood, crashed at Juno’s for our last night together and wondered what I ever did to deserve such a great evening. Then I remembered.

Martha.

181 thoughts on “Taxi blogging.

  1. Yes, well. Martha. I guess she preemptively brought up the whole prison thing so you didn’t beat her to it. Hee. I never used to like her much, but I started liking her when she was in prison. She took it with good grace; gotta give her that.

  2. Holy-freakin’-cow!! Martha Stewart? You’re a stronger woman than I. And I think that’s what anyone would’ve said, or at least thought, when told they don’t let you have knitting needles in prison.

  3. You’re right up there with Martha as far as I’m concerned. Mark Burnett’s next big show: The Yarn Harlot’s Apprentice. Sign me up!!

  4. And now I confess: I learned to knit from the Martha Stewart website. I didn’t know any knitters, and it’s the only place I found directions that made sense to me, a rehabilitated crocheter.

  5. of course you were fabuous with martha! and i like her and all – and subscribe to the magazine – but you’re funny! that beats a serious martha any day!

  6. Wow, Martha huh? I missed it if you told us in Rutherford about Martha…
    It was great meeting you! Thanks for coming to the Garden State!

  7. Martha Stewart? I got light-headed just from that third-hand contact. I applaud your ability to form words in that situation. Really.

  8. Wow! Martha Stewart?! If it’s any consolation, I think I prefer you enormously as a person – not to bash Martha or anything.
    Also, very excited about your coming to Cambridge tomorrow! Porter Square Books also had to move the event, because you’re just too popular, Stephanie…(as an aside, why do all these book stores keep saying things like “Oh, it will just be a few knitters”?)

  9. Nasty poke? I love that comment. Shows a very dry, understated sense of humor. I think it was perfect. Now – will we be learning to make our own knitting needles out of twigs in the backyard, in upcoming episodes of Martha?

  10. MARTHA FREAKING STEWART!!!! Holy Cow! I am sure that you were brilliant! I think I would have passed out… way to stay coherent. I would rather see you than her though anyday…. in fact, please come back to Micihgan or a surrounding state!=) You rock!

  11. Wonderful blogging — loved the sense of excitement and the exhilaration that pervades your book tour messages. There is very much a “defining moment” feeling about this stage of your life– and the energy transmits itself to your audiences, creating a dynamic reciprocity.
    When you’re talented and on the road to fame as you are, then you meet other talented and famous people. Martha’s a wealth of ideas and creativity but so are you!! She’s lucky that you’re on her show!! Great job, Stephanie!! — from Daryl Lynn

  12. DUDE… so if I’ve spoken to someone (you) who has spoken to Martha Stewart, and if Martha says YOU’VE inspired her to knit, and if Martha was the reason I starting knitting 5 years ago, does that mean my brain will explode right this very instant?
    I think yes. Exploding brain. Definitely.

  13. Martha’s got nothing on you. She isn’t NEARLY as funny. And I bet her house isn’t so beautifully insulated. ^_^

  14. I used to hate Martha. Now I like her. It was the prison thing — it made her seem real. It is useful to know, actually, that knitting isn’t allowed in prison. I was considering trying to teach a class, with those short kids plastic needles or something. Well, I probably wouldn’t have gotten around to it for a long time, anyway. But women in prison, at least regular Janes, are really grateful for things like that and they listen closely and try hard. I guess they’re bored — I would be.
    OMG, that got a little preachy. Soooo anyway. Talking to Martha scary. Stephanie handle it very goooood. Stephanie get rewarded by fun night with knitters. Also, taxi blogging good. Adorable cabbie.

  15. Yikes! I’ve ACTUALLY met someone who’s talked to Martha Stuart! I don’t know if I’m impressed or frightened. Woot!

  16. OMG OMG OMG you were IN MY OFFICE BUILDING!!!! Sirius shares the same building as my firm Allen & Overy (we’re on 20/21). OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG πŸ˜€

  17. Hey!next thing you know, we’ll be seeing you on the the Martha Stewart show! I’ll definatly watch that. πŸ˜‰

  18. I would be afraid she would know my linen closet contains a bunch of king size sheets randomly rolled up in a bunch instead of neatly on display just talking to me! No knitting in prison?! Well, if that isn’t incentive to keep us all on the straight and narrow I don’t know what is!

  19. Sweet Jesus on a swaybacked mule!
    No wonder you freaked out. Don’t worry, I like you WAAAAAY better than Martha. When I visit my parents, my mother is sometimes watching her *upstairs* and my dad can hear Martha *downstairs*. He’ll bellow to “turn that sh*t off!!!” and trust me, he’s normally a very charming man. LOL

  20. My mother used to work for Martha, at the magazine. She dealt with her on a number of occasions and while she CAN be terrifying, we have a lot of respect for her in my family πŸ™‚ It sounds like you held up quite well, even if you have no recollection of it! I may be at your Porter Sq. event today, I’m excited!

  21. No knitting in prison? Crap. I gotta start shredding some papers…
    It was great meeting you in Joisey last week! Hope you visit again!

  22. Martha is just a person. And she advocates a lifestyle you don’t apreciate.
    Actually, while I admire Martha, I’d like to give her a good poke with a needle. Because while I think what she does is beautiful (and I do love beauty) she’s caused a lot of women angst over relatively trivial stuff. To quote a famous knitter “It’s only knitting.” or sheets, or ironing. Whatever.

  23. I wish I’d heard you on Martha, I’ll bet you were witty and fabulous. I also wish my library was in a metropolitan area so I could have you visit and give a talk.

  24. Arggh! I spent much of yesterday resisting the siren call of School Products … I should have given in. Hello and Farewell from NYC!

  25. I wish at times that I had the tiniest shred of whatever it is that keeps her chicken house so clean (oh – I remember – A STAFF AND A LOT OF MONEY!). I wish my garden were labeled and weed free. As for the towels, I will stick with my $2.99 Martha Stewart K-Mart clearance mismatched mess.
    WEBS – getting a little scary, huh? I rescheduled a class so my students can attend, and my kid has permission to punch out and come along and listen. You’ll love the place. Where else can you find Regia closeouts for SIX BUCKS A BALL??

  26. Looking forward to meeting you at WEBS. I am still laughing over the Martha Stewart thing. I have attempted a few times to watch her show (before she went to prison) and just couldn’t tolerate the way she talked. Coordinate anything? not happening in my house.
    I keep making the mistake of reading knitting funny things to my husband. He’s sweet, chuckles a little and goes back to what he was doing. I really miss not having more knitters really close to me so that I can share with them. I keep saying “You have to buy the book, it is so funny and real helpful”. I just wish it was on tape so that I can knit and “read” at the same time. Think about that.
    See you Saturday!
    cj

  27. You managed not to pass out while speaking to Martha Stewart. THAT is a “good thing”. And I’ll bet you were witty and clever and intelligent. It would be hard for you not to be.
    Just imagine how scary it would have been to meet her in person!
    All these fun photos of your tour are reminding jealous me to again plead: cometoKingstoncometoKingstoncometoKingston!!!

  28. The Martha Radio Show, how cool! I’m sure you said absolutely wonderful things about knitting. It was a smart cookie that opted to get you on the show, if there’s one thing Martha knows, it’s smart cookies. She certainly has good business sense if nothing else.
    I’m looking forward to hearing you talk about knitting Friday- Have a good trip and be careful with those pokey needles! πŸ™‚

  29. I’m so happy for you – you were on NATIONAL radio, and you got to talk to Martha Freakin’ Stewart!!!!! How exciting! Does anyone have a recording of the show?? I’d love to hear it. πŸ™‚

  30. WOW! Sounds like a real whirlwind of a trip. What is funny (at least to me) is a while ago — a long, long while ago — Martha Stewart living had an article on knitting, and showed some scarves in big, fluffy, chunky yarn that I’d never heard of…but I tore those patterns out and put them away, figuring I’d start to knit again sometime…and I did, about a year and a half later. And I still haven’t figured out where the heck I put the friggin’ patterns. (sigh)

  31. I’m sad to hear that we’re (Webs) freakin’ you out! It’s definitely going to be at a hotel now, but I promise you’ll like the people who are going to take you to and fro. And the hotel is literally a stones throw away, any people who show up at Webs will be listening to you within minutes.
    We’re so happy about your appearance, you have no idea =)

  32. can’t wait to see you at webs saturday!
    martha stewart would make me nervous too. i mean, she could manage a corporation, a prison term, a radio show, perfectly folded linens, spring planting and still bake some delightful cookies i’m sure.
    if i so much as knit an entire sweater, you can be certain that the rest of my life has completely fallen apart.

  33. Martha has OCD and is not allowed in my house, not even in the form of table linens, not that I would ever actually get around to buying table linens.
    Cambridge, here I come! Ruth and Kathleen can’t make it. I may have an awful lot of books for you to sign. I hope you don’t mind. Actually, YOU probably don’t: I hope the knitters behind me in line don’t mind.

  34. What I’m dying to know is whether you’ll be getting Juno a chocolate fountain as a hostess gift. πŸ˜‰

  35. I would say that Martha qualifies as royalty in the “intimidating people you didn’t think you’d ever have to talk to on radio” department. Sounds like you did just fine. I have a feeling that in your shoes, I would have said something much worse than “poke”. Let’s just not go there. I’m quite sure you rocked the house.

  36. Steph, you are so much cooler than Martha.
    Thanks for linking me.
    (I link you all the time – sheepish grin)

  37. I’m sure you did just fine talking with Martha. After all, does she have fans who will drive hours just to hear her talk? I don’t think so.

  38. Remember, Martha called in as the humble visitor coming to worship at YOUR feet – not vice versa. Perhaps your position as goddess of the yarn people has rocked her empire just a little!

  39. Holy Crap in a Can! Martha!
    wow…that is quite an event!! I love that you were just the lovely you…nasty poke…heehee
    although all that perfection rolled up into one person is a bit creepy…
    I still like her though…especially her magazine.
    oh, and how did the sock like Martha?

  40. Someone just mentioned on Knitter’s Review that they went to ta taping of Martha’s show and security made them check their knitting.

  41. Martha Stewart before coffee? After being up all night? Good lord, I would have said much worse things than “a good poke.”
    And hey–didn’t they used to call jail “going in the pokey?” So maybe you were just being clever!

  42. Oh, so there was more to that story. We got distracted by The Pond I think. In fact, there were so many stories with more to them, but that’s the sign of a good bonfire, babe. Relax, smile and nod. You’re doing great!

  43. I just had to email my friends to warn them to put their coffee down before reading your post this morning. Sounds like you had a wonderful day and I’m sure MarthaMarthaMartha was in awe of YOU!

  44. WEB’s will take care of you–no worries. I was there last Saturday and they said there were over 100 signed up to see you, it’s a large place (wait ’til you get to roam around in the back room-I find it more fascinating than the showroom, kinda dark and mysterious!)but a crowd like that would be beyond *cozy*.

  45. Martha Shmartha – it’s you that rocks Steph. Now, about coming to california. i’ve emailed my LYS and she’s gonna reach out and touch your publisher shortly. muahahahhahah!!

  46. Well No wonder your brain disconnected .Arriving at 2am and on the radio talking to Martha at 7am and NO coffee!!! If we were supposed to be up that early we should have all been born in toasters or bird nests. Cannot even imagine it!! Thank God it wasnt me in that situation. My brain doesn’t even know it’s there till 11am and at 1pm its time for a nap.Martha must be an OK person really. She loves dogs and NOW she is taking up knitting . i do hope we get an update on how she is doing with it. You are an inspiration to us all Stephanie EVEN Martha

  47. In the knitting world, Martha has nothing on you! As Ruth mentioned, Martha called in to talk to you! πŸ™‚
    I hope you were able to rest sometime! That’s one crazy schedule.

  48. Hooray, I have just discovered that you will be in Brentwood, TN.. a mere two hours from here.. on my only day off next week. And so I, too, shall be in Brentwood, TN.. a mere two.. bleh, you get the point.
    Hooray!

  49. You’re way cooler than Martha is anyway. I wonder if she was nervous talking to you. I know I would be. You’re too amazing. πŸ™‚

  50. Somebody with a huge staff and loads of money does not make them automatickely interresting or great…
    A yarnharlot that writes her blog in a taxi while knitting socks, makes us laugh, creates knitting olympics and supports charities while raising a family because she is human is a somebody.

  51. Hey Stephanie, just saw that you’ll be in Boston soon. I know your tour looks pretty full, but if you ever get a chance to come up to Maine (about 2 hours north of Boston). We at Halcyon Yarn (located in Bath) would love to see/meet you. Hope you have a great tour!

  52. Martha. Martha Stewart. THE Martha Stewart. Called in to her own radio show SPECIFICALLY to talk to you. Martha Stewart knows who you are. I’ve sat next to and knit and consumed alcoholic beverages with someone Martha Stewart Knows.
    This either makes me famous by proxy, or no longer worthy of being near you. I’m still on my first cup of coffee, so I’m not sure which.
    Will someone be available at WEBS to (report on) help should (when) a nasty credit card accident happen(s)? Cate maybe?

  53. Wow! Martha! I would be intimidated too :o} Glad you like the yarn and spindle! Good luck on the rest of your tour…hope you don’t have to do all your blogging from the bathroom.

  54. Damn! How did I miss that you were coming to School Products!? Are you coming back to NYC sometime soon?
    Is the interview somewhere on the web for download? Is that a terrifying thought for you?

  55. Well I for one am proud of you for saying “poke” to Martha. It’s the truth! Besides, it’s good to know if I get arrested for poking someone out there I can fall back on my years of crochet.
    I’m sure you were great. I wonder how many people you’ve inspired to knit?

  56. Hilda Bernstein, founding member of the Federation of South African Women (the first non-racial womenοΏ½s organisation in South Africa) and of the South Africa Peace Council, was detained under State of Emergency without charge following the Sharpeville shootings of 1960. While she was in prison she and her fellow detainees spent many of their afternoons sitting under a tree and knitting. She wrote a poem about this which is read in the film by her daughter, Toni Strasburg, ‘In Search of My Family’.

  57. Oh boy.. I know how you feel.. I met Soledad O’Brien last night.. and had to summon up the courage to speak to her!! But ya know.. on the flipside.. people feel like that about you! I mean.. I know I did.. But hey.. going and seeing you was good practice for meetting Soledad. I think I did better this time!! And so will you!! After Martha Stewart.. hey.. you can do anything!!

  58. You were IN MY FREAKING BUILDING!!!!!!!!?!?!?!??! And I couldn’t even run into you in the lobby and accost you like a freaking stalker?!?!?!?! I don’t have sirius radio, but they are right. up. stairs. one floor. drat.

  59. At least you didn’t say “arse” to Martha (did you?), so it wasn’t a total failure. In fact, I doubt it was a failure at all. And for the record, the only reason I’d ever tune in to Martha would be to listen to you!

  60. Ditto Ivy…you are WAY cooler than Martha. I am looking forward to meeting you in Lexington and bowing at your (hand-knit-sock-covered) feet. Hubby thinks we’re taking the kids to the Lexington Horse Park, but it’s really all about seeing YOU. I have my priorities, after all. Hang in there, you’ll survive all the running around and come home with some fine additions for your stash.

  61. Aw, Martha’s not so bad. While her persona is certainly larger-than-life, she comes from a solidly blue-collar background, so she’s not that different from any of us. OK, so she’s worth a gazillion dollars, but other than that, she’s not that different from any of us. OK, so maybe she is. Hmmmm. I’m not helping myself here. In any event, I’m sure you dazzled everyone who tuned in. I wish I had heard it. But more than that, i wish you would come back to nyc. Come back, won’t you?

  62. Hardly a surprise, is it, that you’d inspire someone to knit – Martha or anyone else (but if you get invited to the White House, hold out until they commit to peace, wouldja?)
    I’m lovin’ the roadtrip tales.

  63. No knitting in prison? Another good reason for me to avoid that place.
    I think that you did great. Poke is not so bad-it could have been a lot worse, considering your penchant for blurting out “arse” at inappropiate times. πŸ˜‰
    Well done Steph-you should be proud!

  64. You -do- realize that for some people, meeting a certain harlot o’ the yarn would be -just- as exciting (if not more) than talking with auntie Martha, right?
    You may not be in omnimedia, but in your circles, you’re in (at least) the RIGHT one, and there, you’re just as famous.
    Just sayin’.

  65. Steph, you are famous. Maybe not more famous than Martha-but she is infamous as well. The Porter Square event today? Has been moved to a larger venue. I was planning on driving to Grafton tomorrow, but will be there today instead (much quicker to get there than Grafton).
    Oh and I found a canadian penny this morning, a sign I think.
    Enjoy Webs on Saturday, I’ve been there, I know πŸ™‚

  66. In the deep recesses of your over-taxed and obviously deviously tricked self, your audience is fanning you ever so slightly so as not to rumple your fab 7am hairdo but enough to relieve the hot flash of treacherous anxiety and pouring sweat of total self hatred from your brow. you are awesome. I love Martha. I revere her. But you, my queen, have a yarn boy.

  67. I know she’s famous, but I used to work for a company where Martha was a client. Trust me, she’s not a pleasant person in real life. You are a far, far superior woman. And funnier and more charming. And your new room on the back of the house is lovely!

  68. While I’ve always had a certain respect for Martha, especially since the prison episode, she has impossible standards for what passes for “appropriate” homekeeping (I do like her mac & cheese recipe, tho’).
    YOU on the other hand, are such a delightful mix of knitting goddess and down-to-earth wonderful human being that I place you head and shoulders above her. (Someday, you could have a gazillion dollars and I bet you wouldn’t let it go to your head, and you’d still treat everyone with the respect they deserve!)
    Steph, you’re a breath of fresh air. Don’t ever be intimidated by anyone!
    ((((hugs))))

  69. Maaaarrrrrrrrthhhhhhhhhhaaaaa??????????
    Oh my god, I would have died.
    Martha + Yarn Harlot. What a beautiful combination!

  70. So, 7am, no coffee and Martha Freakin’ Stewart?? Now you know how I felt when you got in my car – I’m sitting there, making small talk with you, all the while thinking “The Yarn Harlot is in my car!! Don’t crash! Knitters will be PISSED at you! OMG, STEPHANIE is having dinner with me! She’s very nice, and I’m acting like a dork, I’m sure!” Yeah, that’s how I felt. I hope I hid it well.

  71. I can’t even believe it! Martha! I love it…she knows nothing about knitting…come on. Seriously, you have got her beat. I bet you taught her a thing or too with your “babbling”! I love it…yet, I am jealous.

  72. WOW…WOW…wish i was going to be home in Massachusetts to hear you speak again…the new book will be my travel companion to Arkansas and back….plus my version of sock….not as worthy as yours but its coming along.
    Sharon

  73. You know, Martha was probably intimidated by speaking to you!!! Just keep telling yourself, you knit way better than Martha ever will! And, you probably won’t go to jail doing it!
    The least the radio people could have done was to get you an early morning latte. Or, tell you that Martha herself would be calling. Oh well, you were at the mercy of non-knitters who don’t believe in preparing people for the next complicated stitch.

  74. Any time the name Martha Stewart is even MENTIONED near me I’m afraid my home is going to burst into flames. Or at least my mismatched clothing.
    You are far braver than I. After the knitting in prison comment I would have said “well no shit” on live radio and then would have gotten to find out for myself ’cause I think they lock you up for that, no?
    Gah.

  75. I’m sure that your conversation with martha was fabulous. Even if it wasn’t, just remember, at least you’ve never crocheted a poncho. (I know that you’ve knit several, but come on, she crocheted one.)

  76. Aw shucks. You were in NYC when I wasn’t! Not fair. And apparently there’s no hand-painted laceweight silk left at School Products either. Totally not fair. πŸ˜‰

  77. I can’t believe that Martha’s radio station is so slack that they didn’t give you a huge mug of coffee as soon as you walked in. It would be nothing more than a common courtesy! Geesh! Anyway, I would much rather meet you than Martha. I don’t imagine you will ever make it down to Florida????

  78. Maybe Martha was nervous too? afterall she was talking to the YARLOT. well, maybe not. I second Inky (above) Come to California, we’ll treat you well!!

  79. Hmmmm. I’m impressed that you actually talked to Martha and still had the fortitude to go shopping. Good stamina. Although I suppose Schoolhouse Press will cure just about any ailment.

  80. No knitting in prison? Hmmmm….but I thought Martha got that fab get-out-of-prison poncho from a fellow inmate. Didn’t one of her fellow inmates knit that poncho?
    On a separate note, Steph – that cab driver was enviously eyeing The Sock. Can’t say I blame him:)

  81. Holy crap. I don’t doubt for a minute that you inspired her to knit. But holy crap. I hope they gave you coffee. Though I can sort of imagine that it would have been important not to exceed any caffeine limits at that juncture. If it were me I can totally see fortifying myself with some espresso-based product and then talking really fast and sort of spitting at the microphone. I’m glad you’re more poised (even if you don’t believe it yourself) than that.
    I know you won’t fess up to the existence of a recording of such an appearance, but I’m sure I’m not the only one who would want to hear it.
    Oh, and nobody believes Cassie that it was your fault. Please.

  82. You are hysterical! Martha Stewart may coordinate things, but you are so much more fun than her! πŸ™‚ No knitting in prison? Damn, there goes that plan.

  83. GAH!! I was SO looking forward to seeing you on Saturday at WEBS – I’d talked a non-blogging (but YES-Knitting) friend into going with me, and she was gonna drive AND buy me lunch…and I was gonna get to HEAR YOU TALK!!!
    See, when I checked the WEBS website when you first announced this, I didn’t see ANYTHING that said I needed to register. I went there now to check into this hotel development, and I see “YARN HARLOT SOLD OUT!!” I had to register, and I didn’t.
    I won’t get to see you, and I only live 45 minutes away!!! I wish you could get to a yarn shop in CT, but I don’t see THAT happening in your extremely busy life….
    Sigh.
    I’m glad you have had a great tour, and I know you’ll have a good time at WEBS…I would’ve loved to have met you!!

  84. Now, I must relay my experience of reading your blog today…hold on to your hat…
    I’m in my classroom, my students settled in to a quiet assignment. I innocently open your blog and beging reading. I get excited as I realize you are going to the Martha Stewart show. My breath catches as you realize it’s MARTHA FREAKING STEWART. Then the one time that my 7th grades students are quiet…I SNORT at “She told me that you can’t knit in prison. You have to crochet because prison doesn’t allow knitting needles. I said something like “Sure, yeah. You could give someone a nasty poke with a knitting needle.” then I think I laughed.” SNORT, yes, SNORT…
    My students look up, they have that “what ARE you doing?” look on their faces. I try to explain, as I’m giggling. I read the post aloud. FINALLY, one of them says “oh…Martha was IN prison wasn’t she?” She’s the only one that gets it. I’m still giggling.
    My students now thing I’m completely crazy. I have confirmed thier suspicions. Reading your blog has put me over the edge.
    sigh…it was worth every penny!

  85. 2 points:
    1) Some prisons have knitting programs, at least according to an article I read several years ago. Of course, the needles weren’t allowed to leave the room where the knitting was being done, but it was knitting. In addition, a friend of mine who crochets, worked on Riker’s Island (prison in NYC) for a time and was allowed to take her craftwork (with plastic hook) with her to work.
    2) Spinning’s not that hard, and Stacey does make pretty yarn.

  86. So make sure you have coffee on hand when Martha Stewart tries to track you down for knitting lessons.. lol… And I think I may actually get to see you in St. Louis… planning a knitters night out with my best friend.. its gonna be awesome

  87. Stephanie,
    You won’t have to worry about any Martha Stewart’s when to come to this shop Fri night. We are all so excited, I even had a dream that we had “a sleep over” and jumped in piles of soft yarn…
    See ya at the Friday night party-6:00pm,
    “Martha Stewart doesn’t live here”.

  88. Regarding your book tour. Don’t forget the US has a west coast too. I did get to see you at Stash Yarns in Berkeley. It was a tour for your first book.

  89. Yep, I want to hear that radio exchange, too! And I’m sure you didn’t sound as “babbly” as you think you did.
    Darn, it looks like everyone had such a good time in Rutherford . . . sorry I missed that one!

  90. Meh. I’m not that impressed with Martha. Now you, on the other hand….
    I talked about you at my knitting guild meeting a few meetings ago, and you should’ve seen the faces on some of the *ahem* “older” members. Well, okay, in retrospect maybe I should’ve called you Stehpanie instead of The Yarn Harlot. They were looking at me like I had just cursed, and I was looking at them like they were insane to not know who you were.
    In any case, if I ever meet you, and I start babbling incoherently, please remember it is because I think Martha has nothing on you.

  91. hehehe. You said “nasty poke” to Martha. (snicker).
    And I thought my home decorating class teacher last night talking about “well hung art” was funny.
    (yeah, yeah … I know. Apparently I have the sense of humor on par with that of a 12 year old boy …but whatchagonnado?! ;))

  92. I’m looking to see if any of my business travel intersects with your tour schedule. I wouldn’t do that to see Martha, although I do go downtown to buy her magazine sometimes.
    You were on sattelite radio — you were in outer space!!

  93. re: Martha
    well, if its a choice between stenciling my roast
    beef or knitting another pair of socks,Duh….

  94. I’m impressed you could speak at all! I would have babbled uncontrolled, making lame jokes, probably having a choaking fit then say something like….Good luck with that or Cool or No way or….just shoot me!

  95. YAAAY – I think I’ll get to see you at Classic Yarns on Friday instead!!!
    Psst…I don’t have $$ for your new book, I’m sorry…would it be bad form to bring one of your other books to be signed instead?

  96. I’m so excited about the WEBS event! I missed you when you were in VT last time around so a friend and I are driving down to MASS this Saturday (we’re only 3 hours away). The event has been moved to the Clarion and last I heard there were more than 200 people signed up.

  97. In the pokey, a nasty poke. Sounds like halfa haiku.
    I used to teach in a women’s prison–they banned dental floss, raisins and French fries. Dental floss for obvious reasons (which I guess would rule out circular needles of any size …), raisins because someone once made hooch, fries because, a couple miles away in the men’s facility, cold fries led to a riot.
    I kind of expected you to commiserate with MS about being forced to crochet. Poor thing!
    Have a great time!

  98. hmmm… brain disconnecting with mouth… that’s sort of what happens with me whenever I post on the Yarn Harlot’s blog…(except it’s brain disconnecting with fingers…) Martha? One of us would dissolve like a salt on a slug if we ever occupied anything near the same space–I’m like the anti-Martha (and I don’t say that with any pride whatsoever…) But the Yarn Harlot? There lies true greatness…

  99. Yeah, Martha’s OK, I guess…. But I didn’t notice *her* organizing >4000 people on SIX continents for any type of Olympics! YOU are the Goddess!

  100. Stephanie, one of the reasons we love you is your humility! Try Googling “Yarn Harlot” and “Martha Stewart” and check out how many times your names come up together …
    Before we know it, there will be a Knitter’s Apprentice on TV … or a “Yarn Harlot Living” magazine — filled with ways we can live with yarn, decorate with yarn, hide yarn, buy yarn, dream yarn …
    You’re really much bigger than you realize. And we all love you for it!

  101. I noticed that you might be in Portland, Oregon this summer. Since you will be all the way across the continent anyway, you should consider popping down to the lovely San Francisco Bay Area and visiting us here. There are tons of knitters (as witnessed by me on the ferry every morning) so I am sure you would pack anyplace you went to speak.
    Just a thought.

  102. Well, hell’s bells, now we need to know WHEN you and Martha will be broadcast!! I can sweet-talk a colleague into taping it for me (no, I won’t, that would be an infringement of copyright, so scratch that, I’ll just invite myself into his office or home. Whenever.)
    Can you post a time? Martha’s Sirius webpage does not list actual interview guests (or any other truly useful detail).

  103. Delurking for a minute to say that your description of how nervous you were talking to Martha sounds an awful lot like how I feel about heading to Porter Square in 2 hours to see a certain knitter-writer-extraordinaire… but people are just people, right? That’s what I keep telling myself anyway! πŸ˜‰

  104. We met at Fiona’s book launch and I liked you then with your famous great-great-grandfather story, right off the cuff. But I was howling today with the Martha thing. Kudos (whatever that means) Stephanie! I think you handled yourself wonderfully!

  105. Me like you blog. You talk Martha. Me not read more blog after “Martha”. No can am do. Read not worky. Me like you blog.
    (Translated: “Squuuueeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!”)

  106. Needle pokes! I think Weenie On a Plane got to you somehow.
    I admit now I feel a little better about the suggestion that you should smack your kids with your RSI arm of steel. What was I thinking? Oh wait, my brain ran off and had a bit of a sit down. *sigh*

  107. Needle pokes! I think Weenie On A Plane got to you somehow.
    I admit now I feel a little better about my ‘suggestion’ that you should smack your kids with your RSI arm of steel. What was I thinking? Oh wait, my brain ran off and had a bit of a sit down. *sigh*

  108. What a funny story! I’m sure that Martha was not put out by the jab about poking somebody in prison. That is really cool that you were on her radio show. Happy knitting!

  109. TAHT IS SO COOL!!!! πŸ˜€ I’m sure you were great on Martha’s radio show.
    Now they need to get you on the TV show. THAT WOULD ROCK SO HARD!!! πŸ˜€
    Sounds like you are just all over the place. I hope you’re getting some rest in between all your events.
    You coming West? I guess should go check the events list. *L*

  110. Oh my gosh. I wish you were coming to NC. “nasty poke”. I inhaled water and nearly had to be transported to the ER. I’m very much enjoying your travelogue!

  111. You were on Martha?! BEFORE COFFEE!? Are you a masochist? But really, I’m sure you did fine – and hey, any excuse to go and console oneself by buying yarn, right? But as your fame grows dear, you simply have to remember that you’re entitled to a few perks. Demand that coffee be waiting for you!
    I love that you got the cabbie on the blog! Did you tell him where to go to see his picture? Oh, and are you by any small chance coming to Maryland? Having missed you in Doylestown, I might be able to catch you there!

  112. I would never listen to Martha on the radio, after all I got my satellite radio to listen to Howard Stern, but I will try to listen when I get a copy of the show you were on. You did great in Philadelphia by the way, if you did half as well on the radio it must have been a good show.
    P.S. I say you still owe me some money for all the alcohol I had to get during the knitting Olympics, even if my wife’s project turned out beautiful!

  113. You inspired Martha Stewart to knit. I mean, of course you inspire all us regular people to knit. But to inspire someone like Martha.
    I knew you had powers, but never imagined they were this big!
    πŸ™‚

  114. You are important and wonderful. Martha is a wannabe. No contest there. They didn’t give you coffee? Losers.
    Make sure WEBS gives you time to explore the warehouse. It’s the experience of a lifetime.

  115. Martha is an incredibly shrewd businesswoman (perhaps a little too shrewd for her own good) and far too AR about her sheet corners for my tastes, but she’s just a person. Just like everyone else; just like the president or Queen Elizabeth or anyone else … and rest assured that no matter how mortified you might have been about the poking thing (I think it’s hysterical myself), there is at least one thing in this world that you do much better than she does — you create beauty with yarn. You have, in fact, inspired me via bookbookbook to try creating my very own lace shawl pattern to remind myself of my recent Paris trip. The most that Martha ever inspired me to do was hide under my hardly-ever-made beds because of the state of my linen drawers.
    Actually, that makes two things you do better than she does! πŸ˜‰

  116. Trumped by the Other Martha again!! I’d like to give her a nasty poke with a (metal sock) needle – she is so condescending. My mom likes her but I never took to her. You have a much nicer voice and are a real person – even though you left me and Kathe and our socks off the blog. I’m crushed, and ready to abandon my second sock. (I’m so unphotogenenic that I’m sure you did me a great service by not printing the picture.) BTW, my real name is – you guessed it. However, should you ever schedule an appearance on the MS show I will watch it, that one time only. Wouldn’t miss it for anything.

  117. Please! Reach down RIGHT NOW and pinch yourself! Hard! HARD ENOUGH TO LEAVE A MARK!
    Are you dreaming?
    πŸ™‚
    Friday night.
    xo

  118. Wow. I probably would have thrown up, then studdered a rambling apology for all that was wrong in my house at the moment after hearing Martha’s voice. Good job! I’m sure you were deemed a “good thing” while on the air πŸ™‚ Wish I had sirius radio, I would have tuned in!

  119. I just got your book yesterday. Very funny. McNally and Robinson is where you can pick it up in the Calgary, Alberta area. They have an awe inspiring collection of knitting books.
    Martha, very cool. I’m not sure that I like her as a person, but I admire her business sense (insider trading notwithstanding) and her abilities to run a huge business.

  120. Is it sad that I went sorta grey in the brain when I read that you spoke with Martha Stewart? Cuz I did, on your behalf. And yes, the very fact that you formed words was outstanding! Of course, I suck at meeting people. If I ever get the chance to finally meet one of my stalkees in real life, I will most likely wet myself, drool a bit then mutter something brilliant like “Disney fish I like Pie!”
    You, my dear Harlot, were cool as a cucumber, I’m sure.

  121. Hi there! Thanks for coming out to Rutherford. I understand now the look of dread in your eyes. It was from coming off of a radio show with someone who everyone has an opinion about. I will keep my opinions about the Martha to myself. You realize that by speaking with Martha, you are a couple tenths of a way from Howard Stern, eh? (I think they’re on the same satellite) Now if that reprobate was willing to talk about knitting, don’t bother going.

  122. Holy Home Making, Batman! I would’ve just fallen over and died. You, apparently, have much more mental fortitude than I do.
    I’m sure you did a great job with Martha. Congrats… You’re moving up in the world!

  123. Holy freakn cow…. and everything everyone else said too πŸ™‚
    plus : Are you EVER coming to Victoria BC?
    I promise its beautiful

  124. Now you know how my sock feels about meeting your sock.
    Shall we let Oprah know what she’s missing?

  125. Wow- doing anything on less than 5 hours of sleep and without coffee already makes you a stronger woman than I could claim to be—but talking to her martha-ness?! I think my head would have exploded or something. I’m with Martha-er, Mardi-not a fan, though I know many who woulda plotzed, as we say here in NYC, where you’re going to come next time so we don’t have to drive out to Jersey(tired of hearing that yet?I never said I wasn’t a broken record…just remember the chocolate) You survived the Garden State, too! It was a kick to meet you. Continued safe(and fun and blogworthy) travels!

  126. I wanted to thank you for stopping by New Jersey. While we’re not far from NYC and Philly, it’s nice to have something right by home. Umm, I scrolled over the pictures, and I noticed that the tag over my group came up whackknruth. I understand the Rutherford part, but are you trying to tell us something? πŸ˜€

  127. Wow, the harlot and Martha together. Too cool. I like Martha, and your blog always makes me smile. I’m sure you weren’t nearly as babbly as you think you were. I wish I had sirius radio and could have heard the interview! Now, please come to Virginia Beach on the tour. πŸ™‚

  128. Martha Stewart???
    Were your pants zipped up?
    Were you using needles you had whittled yourself from your own stand of bamboo fetchingly planted in the shape of a giant ball of yarn?
    And dang, you really like the nosebleed seats at a ball game, don’tcha?
    Two other things: glad you mentioned Joe, hadn’t seen his name in a long time; and where’s rams???

  129. Thanks for the reading in Cambridge tonight. You’re hilarious! Hope the MIT crowd didn’t scare you too much. And I must redeem myself — we aren’t 100% staff. There’s a Media Lab grad student and an MIT alum in the group, so we do have some wicked smart people.

  130. OK, love the tour, you’re cooler that Martha (really) and those of us in the NY area are feeling a little…..missed! PHilly, Boston, freaking Sk***tles but no NYC area event! Westchester *cough* is full of knitters…maybe an idea for the next round!

  131. Martha?? (snarl) SHE is not worthy of you. Although I did get a heck of a fine rhubarb shortbread recipe from her website. But her cakes are way too fussy!! Make a cake, toss some icing on it. There! It’s decorated.
    But if Mark Burnett wants to make a “Yarn Harlot’s Apprentice” I am totally there!! Maybe I could learn how to spin out of it!
    I am so hoping you come to Seattle! You have been having way too much fun on tour. Come spread the fun over here!! But if you have your reading at Elliott Bay Books, Please ask them to add more lights to the reading room. It is not so good for knitting in there!

  132. Nooooooo! I didn’t know you were coming to Boston, and now it’s too late! And I would have brought the sock I just made (my first!) from the sock recipe in your book. And instead I just sat in a library and cast on the second one. Damn.

  133. I started reading your blog just this month and now wish I could handle half the things you do in real life! I hope you’ll find more places with connection or that your bathroom is a really nice cosy place.

  134. I can barely talk to my family at 7am, let alone Martha Stewart and a radio audience.
    I just finished reading Knitting Rules, which was excellent!

  135. Loved your ‘Martha moment’! The best comment I ever heard about her, was from a friend of my SIL, “anybody could do what she does if THEY had hot and cold running butlers.” I have shared that with lots of friends. I wonder if hot and cold running yarn boys would do?
    My DH reads every posting and comment, and actually laughs out loud.

  136. Ok, if you are going to become a regular on radio, (in NYC) you have to learn something.
    even though all the signs say ‘avenue of the Americas’, only out of towners call it that.
    IT’s was and still is, 6th Avenue.. (and the el, torn down in the 1930’s was sold to japan for scrap metal, (and its said, help to build the bombs that sunk the US fleet at pearl harbor) that last bit is a NYC true borns bit of lore.. (which we all swear is true!)
    so remember, 6th Avenue.. (the building was it 1212 6th? looked like it.. (but it could have been a few blocks uptown, (time/life building?) unfortunately, many of the building on 6th avenue are copy cats, with no clear style. –you tell them apart by their fountains (or lack of fountains.)
    keep on coming to NY–maybe one day we’ll get you to a guild meeting (the BAKG.org has over 350 members!) and soon you’ll be taking the subway, not taxi’s (the e or f train is the fastest route to LaG airport.. under 20 minutes in rush hour!) or you can stop by and meet the informal group of knitter that meet every wednesday at the citicorp center (53rd and lexington ave, in the food court/atrium) from 6 to 9PM.

  137. I don’t know how the #@! you ever read all these comments, but I already KNOW that you do.. so this is just another rah rah, you go GIRL from yet another knitting-nutty fan.. I finished your book, I’m in withdrawals.. write more.. I’ve nothing to read in my knitting breaks..
    and BTW, whoever was it that thought that the life of a “writer-on-the-road” was cool.. you sound exhausted.. happy, but tired.. many viritual hugs go out to you, from someone who used to run a bookstore, and host authors. You’re working Waaaaaayyy harder than anyone knows..
    hope you get to sleep in your own bed one of these days. T

  138. I’m super impressed Martha called you. I think its a kind of endorsement for knitting in general and you in particular. Traveling can result in some under-caffineated moments. My heart goes out to you. Possible back-up plans; make it part of your contract someone must supply you, or carry coffee candies.

  139. I hate the idea of being intimidated by another human being, but I don’t know whether I’d have the fortitude to treat Martha Stewart blandly.
    By the way, I got my copy of Knitting Rules, and I’m so happy. It’s big enough that I don’t have to limit myself to a page a day to make it last. I’m really very happy, and congratulations on its publication. I wish you great success.

  140. Dear Stephanie,
    Martha ain’t got nothin’ on you! You have educated, inspired and entertained thousands of us daily. You have brought together women (and men) with a love of knitting/yarn/wool and made us a family (of sorts). You have also totally inspired me! Because of you…. I have knit my first (of many) pair of socks. ANd am totally hooked. I’ve inspired my friend (who doesn’t even know what a blog is… as well) Stephanie… you’re da bomb! Love ya

  141. Stephanie,
    I’ll be one of your “handlers” tomorrow at Webs, and we’re all so excited to see you! Please don’t be freaked about the numbers, know that we in Western Mass are the friendliest and craftiest people in the world and will be welcoming you not only with open arms but (speaking for the Webs staff) with our considerable expertise in the non-knitterly art of public speaking, crowd control, and knowledge of good coffee and it’s environs. Can’t wait to see you.

  142. The difference between you and Martha is that you are accessible by the people . . . me . . . and Martha makes me feel inadequate. I don’t have time to make my own personalised napkins for dinner parties, I am too busy knitting! Well done, keep up the good work. I love your blog and wish I lived on the other side of the world so I could come and see you – or perhaps you coudl visit DOWN UNDER???

  143. Yikes. Martha. That IS a little terrifying. But then, she’s not washing/carding/spinning gansey yarn with plans to knit it into a stunning masterpiece for her dearest love. So there!

  144. I am lookig forward to seeing you on Sat at WEBS. I DO NOT NEED ANY YARN!!! That will be my mantra for the next 30 hours. Maybe then I won’t buy any. Right! See you soon.
    Judy of Ma

  145. O yes! Stephanie definitely needs to come DOWN UNDER!!! Then she could sign my books ;o)
    Congrats on talking to Martha. I’m sure you were just fine and made sense. It might have felt like you were babbling, but I’m sure nobody else thought so.

  146. Instead of “Good Morning, Martha,” I would have started with “Habluhh, [pause], habluhhuh.” You done good. See you tonight! I’ll be doing my best not to start with “Habluhh…”

  147. Martha Stewart…hmmm…but was it a good thing (I couldn’t resist, sorry)? If I were addicted to alcohol instead of fiber for knitting, and you were the alcohol enabler, I would by now have drunk…drank(?) my way into cirrhosis (sp?). Of course I clicked the link to Yarnart and now just gotta have me some YarnArt Crazy Color. Have you seen that scrumptious sweater on their website? Not ususally a big fan of red and pink but the vision of that sweater makes me want to gobble it up. BTW, I foresee a TV show in your future. For the sake of those knitters like me (there must be 1 or 2 others) who don’t have cable TV, would you please insist that your show be on one of the Big 3 networks here in the U.S.? Please?

  148. You have made one grieveous error, beloved Steph. No, nothing to do with buying yarn, or stammering at Martha (yeah, sure, she’s going to do her own knitting, you bet.) But you are constitutionally required to root for the Jays. You simply must. Heck, I root for the Jays, and I’m an American. Did you knit at the game? It ain’t easy, I’ll tell ya.

  149. Hey Steph, When are you coming to the Baltimore/DC area? You can see the Blue Jays play the Orioles while you’re here!
    Oh, and who’s this Martha woman everyone’s talking about? Surely she can’t compare to our beloved Yarn Harlot! πŸ™‚

  150. Hi Steph,
    wow you got a shot of me in the back of that last shot.. in the white shirt.. i was just so blown away that you remembered me.. got back yesterday morning at 4am from south carolina.. it was great.. and i wish i could go back sooner rather than later.. have been reading the knit lit books and your newest one.. too.. love it! πŸ™‚ was supposed to have that foot surgery today.. they messed up so i’m going into the hospital ugh next thursday … ugh.. a little frightened but i hope to use my knitting to calm me tonite.. have finished my sockapaloooza sock and will be sending that off tomorrow.. so at least that has been done.. lots of hugs from nyc.. and ugh you poor thing you had to talk to ms… you are way cooler than her in my book!! hugs karola

  151. Love your blog! Just have to tell you that Paula, the lady with the sock thingy happens to be my mother! You thought she was a woman with conviction — try being her daugher!! (That conviction, I am so proud to note, has been passed on to me.)

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