Seriously

Last night I became patient zero for a virus so nighmarish that I am thinking about calling it Wes. I am so sick that My Hair Hurts. I spent the entire night on the chesterfield, lamenting the empty box of cold/flu medicine, wondering which spawn of darkness I live with finished it up, and considering combining other medications in an attempt to cause unconsciousness. I drank 90 glasses of water, wiped my nose raw, made the tea that Norma sent me last year (I even drank it.) my eyes ran, I coughed, I contemplated how loose your teeth can feel if your sinuses have big enough trouble and generally wished for relief or death. There is no longer any difference between them.

This morning I have to take Meg to an oral surgeon to have an extra tooth removed (Yes. Meg has an extra tooth. Just like a shark. This should surprise no-one who has met my middle child.) so I staggered upstairs about 7:30 to put on clothes, opened my bedroom door and snagged jeans, realized I had to blow my nose or take my life, staggered out and then came back for my tee shirt.

As I re-entered, Joe rolled over and asked if I could please keep the door to the bedroom closed so he wasn’t disturbed. (This would be the door that I was entering though to get my clothes so that I might serve my family and go into the world clad today)

Can I ask? What is wrong with men? (That might properly be “spouses” but I’ve never been jerked around by a same sex partner in the dead of night so I don’t know if the same rules of stupidity apply.) What are they thinking? Are they thinking? What sort of person doesn’t consider that if you have had NO sleep, and they have had LOTS of sleep, that asking for MORE sleep is a serious misstep. What gene is missing in their code that they do not think that saying what they are thinking right then is a mistake?

When you have been up all night with an illness/crying baby/puking toddler, why does some self preservation instinct that would keep an otherwise intelligent, thoughtful, kind man from saying that they would like for you not to disturb their full eight hours of comfortable sleep not kick in? Where is the inner voice that says “Shut up stupid. She hasn’t slept. Look at her. She’s only glued together with willpower and tea. Look at her eyes. Look at her hair. Look at the tissue paper stuck to her cheek and Shut. Up.”

It is only because I lacked the strength to smack him that he lives yet.

288 thoughts on “Seriously

  1. I’ve got one of “those” at my house too. And 3 sons (just miniature men really).

  2. That’s why we all need a butler, as in those English tv shows, to clean up after us and then smile and bow politely as they remove the tea things. Hope you feel better soon. I can’t imagine how you got sick–you never come in contact with any people….

  3. Oh, Step. I’m sorry you’re sick. Wish I were closer. I’d take Jaws in for the tooth extraction for you. And Joe, well, I’d’ve probably whacked him. Drink lots of fluids. Wash you hands often. Try to rest. Get better. You deserve it.

  4. Oh, I’ve got one of those too. My favorite was when he got up at 8:30 one morning (after I had been up with the kids since 6:00) to tell me that he can’t cope with being woken up by the sound of the baby crying every morning. Ha!
    Hope you feel better soon, and I hope Meg’s tooth removal goes well.

  5. Poor Stephanie!! I’ll be thinking about you today – positive thoughts to make you feel better; negative thoughts to make Joe sick (unless he’s one of the ‘needy men’ when he gets sick – then I’ll think of something else, like growing an extra tooth….). Feel better!

  6. AWwwwwwwwww I’m so sorry you have that cold ,(flu) that is going around right now. Someone told me that they took “ColdFX and whammo gone!! I don’t know if the cold went whammo or if THEY did as i haven’t heard from them since.As for men –awwwww “They are such weak creatures . How can we not love them ” they give you all they ‘ve got. don’t expect more ,they just don’t know better. Anothony Quinn said this about women in his movie of Zorba ( altho he was referring to women at the time ) the staement is much better applied to the male species. i think so anyway . Go on strike for at least a day Stephanie and let your body fight this war of the virus its in .

  7. Get well, Lovey.
    Can’t speak for your Joe, but my hub is an only child who denies vehemently that he’s the centre of the universe. And STILL thinks I should respect his need for a decent night’s sleep when I obviously haven’t had one. You may be right. Maybe it IS that Y chromosome.
    Like I said, get well
    Hugs

  8. Oh, poor thing.
    Reading this makes my mystery allergy/headcold seem less … dramatic. Although, since I live alone, I was not annoyed by a man, but by the street cleaners this morning who apparenly wanted me up at 6 AM.
    Wouldn’t pouring cold tea that you couldn’t drink because you don’t have the strength get the point across, too? 🙂

  9. Dang, this virus can’t come thru the computer can it, cuz I’m starting to feel icky just reading this thing……………eeeeewwwwwwww

  10. Poor baby!! Never fear, his bad karma will come around and bite him in the butt. (You might consider “accidentally” using his toohbrush while you’re still extra-germy – never hurts to give karma a little assistance.)

  11. But not too sick to blog… what does that say?
    Feel better…
    Mary

  12. It must be on that pesky little y chromosome. Sorry to hear your under the weather. Nate is notorious for that level of stupidity when sleep is concerned.

  13. Oh my – I well remember dear husband complaining of being “so tired” when he got up and handled ONE of the 6 nightwakings a night during a week-long toddler sleep regression. Its amazing he’s still alive.
    Hope you are feeling well soon.

  14. I am so sorry you are sick! I have to say that I am not surprised in the least, what with all of the airline travel lately. Those things are just breeding grounds for virus-du-jour. Take care of yourself!
    If you don’t already do this, start taking vitamin C every day of your life. While a lot of people only take it when they get sick, I can say from experience that 2000mg everyday will prevent you from getting sick.
    *once, when I was terribly sick and on the edge of nausea for hours, my ex came to my sickbed and asked if I wanted some fried chicken for lunch…

  15. Just to add to whatever the stupid gene is that some guys have- I was 4 months pregnant, sick as a dog, spent the whole night on the cold floor of the bathroom, wondering if this would bring on early labour-when my husband says,at around 4:30 a.m.,”Are you ok?” (Ah- I thought- he cares! he really really cares!) I said-“No- I am so sick- I have never been this sick.” He counters with…”Well, could you keep it down? I need my sleep.” In the morning, he even had the nerve to askwhere his coffee was (which, of course, I wasn’t drinking at the time. The man has had to sleep with one eye open ever since!

  16. Oh, gracious! Don’t kill the husband. They won’t let you knit in jail – especially when your weapon of choice is a set of size 9 straights. Of course, you could always use circulars as a garotte.
    No! Bad Jess! Do not encourage homicide by knitting needle!
    Chant with me: You’re a better mommy/knitter out of jail than in jail.

  17. I’m so sorry you’re sick but you have been pushing yourself. Get well soon. As for men, have you not been informed that men are born with the jerk gene? Yep, they all have it.

  18. I feel your pain – I’m also sick. And I have to get up to tell my DH how to dress our 2 year old daughter – if I don’t, DSS will call and acuse me of neglect!
    My DH is also incredibly hard to wake up. What is that? If a baby is crying, I’m up like a shot (unless I’m sick), but he’ll pretend to sleep right though it!
    Have some blueberry brandy and you’ll feel better!

  19. You’ve hit it Steph – it’s a genetic thing. Maybe it’s an extra gene on the Y chromosome. If it’s possible to rest and get that missing medicine today, do it.

  20. My (male) doctor told me once, “If men had to have the babies, the species would have died out a long time ago. Women are much tougher – although men are good for grunting and lifting heavy things.” Needless to say, I love this doctor! Get lots of rest, drink tea until you feel like a water balloon, and seed Joe’s bed with a bunch of size 1 dpns. It’ll help, really.

  21. After you get all the things “done” that mothers need to do whether you are sick or not. Find a quiet jazz radio station or cd; fix yourself a cup of tea and then fill up the bathtub and soak some of those aches and pains away. Then when finished you could push your husband in the cold tub. FEEL BETTER/ cecilia

  22. Dear Joe.
    Don’t. Be. A. Jerk.
    That is all.
    Oh… and get thee to the store to pick up a new box of cold and flu for your lovely wife, who I might remind you that you have been missing desperately during her tireless business travel over the last several weeks.
    Dear Steph.
    Feel better soon, sweets. In my experience, a day of couch, knits, and bad tv are the ticket.

  23. Oh and G*d forbid if *they* get sick! It’s like the end of the world.
    Hope you’re feeling better soon, but I can see that with all that travel you are probably overtired and exposed to lots of germies (from the people on the planes, not the knitters. Never the knitters.)

  24. Oh, damnit, Stephanie. I’m so sorry you’re feeling colossally crappy. I personally have been wondering if I’m a walking time bomb myself. I have been curiously too well this winter. It’s not right. (shit, I know: be careful what you ruminate upon….)
    Have you tried this stuff called “Airborne”? I have become a huge believer in it this year. The best part is it’s available everywhere — even the mainstream drugstores and supermarkets down here, and it’s inexpensive. (since you’re seeing so many airports lately, it’s definitely available in ALL the airports. And my guess is you caught this bastard flu on a plane.)

  25. It’s the same gene (or lack thereof) that makes them snap awake when you turn off the TV (in the bedroom, which woke you up) at 3:00am on a work night, and indignantly proclaim “Hey!! I was watching that!!” Sheesh. It’s a program about sharks for crips sake and you don’t even like animals!! Gimme a break!!
    Good thing he has fine taste in jewelry……

  26. Well, here’s the thing… there’s no point in having *two* grumpy people from a lack of sleep, is there?
    Yeah… I can see I’m not going to get a lot of sympathy on that poitn of view… 😉

  27. Try airbourne!!!!!!!!! It is a fizzy thing you put in water, I have been taking it with everyone around me dropping in sickness and I have been spared.
    or smack Joe which ever works for you.

  28. Ugh, condolences. Hope you get to feeling better soon. If I were in that situation, I’d probably go out of my way to cough in his general direction and all over his things…see how he likes it!

  29. oh Stepahine,
    If your brain wasn’t so filled with sinus fluids you would know that you are tired beyond belief from traipsing around the US at a pace no one should ever be made to do. Plus you were required to be nice and give witty talks. Sheesh! I am amazed at your fortitude and congratulate you on a job more than well done! Now your body is saying it needs REST b i g t i m e.
    As for your DH, the problem is genetic. They are born without something and we, as women, are forever trying to understand why they do not have those few items that seem so simple and basic. This is not by way of excuse but really, he should be saying, ” Let me get up and take our middle child to the dentist. You need rest so I will bring you tea and scones later.” Of course, men only say this in romance novels but we can dream. I am very proud of you for not slugging him. I hope you left the door open and got to nap in the waiting room. Forget making dinner. You have been working umpteen hours a day for how many days…. and deserve a good rest. I send you love and hugs.

  30. Sending good thoughts your way, and my pet gremlin to torment Joe for his loutish ways.
    Forget about blogging, just rest and get better.

  31. Obviously, his “mental editor” was out to lunch. If I were you, I think I’d go on strike.

  32. Get well soon!
    In the meantime, petroleum jelly works wonders for a raw nose (something with which I unfortunately have a lifetime of experience).

  33. It’s spooky how you know what goes on in my house! I can’t begin to tell you all of the times when I was sleepless due to pregnancy/illness/sick kid that I didn’t envision myself with sudden super human strength that would allow me to lift up the mattress and dump the clod onto the floor. I even thought about dumping a bucket of cold water on the clod, but common sense got the better of me, because we all know who would be stuck mopping up. Hope Wes leaves soon.

  34. I laughed my arse off this morning, not because you’re sick, but, because I think every woman has been through some form of this shall we say “lack of empathy” (annoying selfishness) men seem to be born with.
    Go to bed, stay there. Let the world fall down around your ears and I agree about seeding the bed with tiny little sharp pointy things. By the way, did you know that those round pointy toothpicks are the same diameter as 2mm DPN’s? Just a thought. Don’t want to risk losing a real DPN to a P.O.’d hubby. 😉

  35. Definately get some “Airborne” – take it.. lots of it.. makes this crud run away fast. Yuckers.. I think you showed great restraint with Joe.. I probably would have located a glass full of ice water over his head.
    Dear Joe – there are several thousand of us out here who carry pointy sticks and like Steph one heck of alot.. be afraid, be very afraid..

  36. Our husbands must share DNA… I’ve told mine that he’s darn lucky our daughter started sleeping through the night when she was six weeks old, or else we’d either be divorced or he’d be a splatter on the wall.
    I hope you start feeling better soon! *hugs*

  37. I was 8 weeks pregnant my ex washed all my clothes and threw them in the dryer. My wardrobe at the time was all cotton. Not even the pre-shrunk kind. Next morning I couldn’t fit into ANYTHING. He oh so casually says “Well honey you already are chunking up a little,” … I was so enraged I called his mother and had her yell at him for me. Sidebar was for the rest of the time we were together he got to say nothing about me buying clothes, ever.
    Stuffy sinuses, take Jack and Jill Expectorant. It’s made by Buckley’s so you know it works but doesn’t taste so horrible that you want to throw yourself in front of a pavement roller. Take with your prefered cold medicine and sinuses should drain. Well it’s worked for me anyways.
    Feel Better!

  38. Sorry you’re sick, Stephanie. There must be something going around, my family has been ill all week. Men lack some kind of gene, that is true. *lol*

  39. Hm. Similar to my husband. I’m the shower first night after returning home from c-section with baby #5 – baby begins to cry – I begin to cry and wail in shower (who knew I had a terrible infection I would be re-hospitalized for?) – he’s in bed with pillow over his head so the cries won’t keep him awake. Uh huh. And this is the one I call “Mr. Perfect.”
    Feel better soon so you can catch up on your responsibilities! God knows a sleep-deprived man can’t tackle Mr. Washie. 🙂

  40. Geez! I thought I was the only one. Four kids under 10 ( one 18mos and one 7 mos) and a Hub that insist’s it’s his right to sleep 10 hours a day….nuf said. He wouldn’t dream of getting up in the middle of the night. I’m sick too.Think it might be allergies though. Feel better soon. Go sit in the sun in a lawn chair for a bit with your knitting. Works for me.

  41. Actually, the science librarian here told me that there are only two genes connected to the Y chromosome, so they are missing quite a lot…
    I hope you feel better quickly!

  42. Usually when I’m sick and have to get out of bed, for work or things I like to call ‘responsibilities’ I get through it with the NyQuil/DayQuil back to back route…. If either box/bottle (I’m not picky)was empty though, I’d be looking for something blunt and heavy to do 1 of 2 things: Try and self-inflict unconciousness (the pain couldn’t be any worse right?)or find the cuplrit and use said blunt object to intimidate them into going to the store.
    This morning I had a similar experience (minus the germs) As I was peeling myself out of bed for work (at 4:05 a.m.), my boyfriend (on disability for the past year)with his usual ‘don’t bother me, I’m sleeping’ snapped at me about the quality of his cell phone, and if I could turn the light off while I took the dogs out to pee (it’s on a dimmer already!!).. ‘of course honey – sleep well, I’ll be at work’ was all he received…. I wonder if he was concious enough to hear the sarcasm. Hope you feel better soon!!

  43. Hey Steph! Adding to the list of home remedies, I recommend putting a lamp ring with a couple (but only one or two) drops of eucalyptus oil (maybe also a drop of lavender) next to you on the couch, and using a Neti pot.
    So sorry you’re sick…hope you feel better soon…

  44. You need a jar of marbles. Place said jar in freezer. When spouse is a lout, retrieve the jar and pour the marbles into the bed.
    This is much better than pointy things: 1)causes two kinds of discomfort at once, 2)reusable, 3) won’t cause those hard-to-remove bloodstains on the sheets.

  45. If you ever figure out why men do stupid stuff like that (or even better, how to STOP it) please do let us all know. I feel your pain.
    Get well soon!

  46. *I’ve never been jerked around by a same sex partner in the dead of night so I don’t know if the same rules of stupidity apply.*
    They do.
    Men, I swear.
    I hope you get, I dunno, four of five minutes of peace to recover at some point today.

  47. AMEN!!!!!!! Ditto!!!!! Preach it Sista!!!
    YES!! What is up with that??
    And Seriously.. we need to stop having similar things happening!!!! I didn’t see your blog before I wrote mine.. My husband killed my coffee maker.. and left me with ONE cup of coffee.. OI!!I was up with toddlers, and daughters and hamsters last night!

  48. Oh, I hope you feel better soon. And only let Joe live if he brings you cold medicine and takes a timeout with Mr Washie.

  49. That cold marble idea is great!
    My husband loved to get up in the morning–after a night when I was up with a baby about seventy zillion times and he got eight hours of sleep–and then complain that he was tired.
    He’s lucky he survived to tell about it.
    Hang in there, Steph!

  50. When you’re feeling a bit better (soon, I hope!), jump all over and tickle mercilessly the next time he’s sleeping comfortably.
    When my cats were younger and a little more playful, I used to pop them on the bed and make them chase feathers or the laser pointer dot all over Matt’s sleeping body. He was helpless – couldn’t smack ’em or shove them off the bed.

  51. Yes, the same rules of stupidity apply to same sex partners. I’ve been an insensitive ass in the middle of the night [she says while dodging the totally justified bitchy emails about to arrive in her inbox]. And Wifey … she’s an insensitive ass too. There’s equal opportunity stupidity in our house.
    Hang in there. Drink tea and avoid sharp objects. 🙂

  52. I was about to feel comforted by your story, which illustrates this genetic defect so well–Yay! I’m not alone!–except…
    Yay. I’m not alone. It’s genetic. Shit, that means he can’t fix it.
    I hope you feel better soon, lovey.

  53. Sorry about your being sick! I myself have to 1) turn on a fan on high to block the noise; 2) shut the bedroom door as soon as it has been opened by the cat (like twelve thousand times, from either side); and 3) make sure no children run past said door while the P******* and the P** is sleeping…till whenever. I’m up at 6:30, having trained my circadian to wake up with the human alarm clock (DS).
    Last week I very gently said, “If you know I’m having a day like I’m having today and you’re going to take a nap, PLEASE DON’T MENTION IT TO ME. I know you’re going to sleep. I don’t want to hear about it.” He really is a smart guy. But I shouldn’t have had to tell him that one.
    Sympathies going your way!

  54. ..and yet, when they get the sniffles they take to bed for 4 days and expect to be waited on and pampered “just like Mom used to do!”…at least in my house!

  55. Yup – the exact same thing happens to me in the morning when I get up at 4:30 to let the puppy outside! I get my butt out of bed and let him out and try not to wake up sleeping husband and also not stub my toe in the darkness all while he snores away. The rare occasions when he does get woken up – I hear about it. “Close the door, stop making so much noise!”
    Yeah – yeah – shut up and get your butt out of bed! I feel like yelling!
    Men – who needs kids when you’ve got one of those!

  56. I think that men count on our weaken states to say those types of things. Think about it, if we were 100% healthy and they were that insensitive, self-absorbed, whatever, we’d smack them back to kingdom come. (or put their butts out on the cold couch). However, when we’ve been up all night ill or dealing with ill — and a little green around the edges — they think, “oh, I don’t have to censor myself, she can’t hurt me — I can take her.”
    Feel better, get some good drugs, and put your cold feet on Joe’s back to get him back.

  57. Betsy mentioned the Airbourne stuff. I highly recommend it. I swear every time I travel I come home with some funky bug that makes me long for the sweet relief of death.
    I hope you are feeling better and get a chance to sleep. Men (spouses, the other person) get annoyed when we are sick. I think it’s because they realize we are so low that it’s the perfect opportunity to kick us when we’re down. Or they are secretly pouty that we can’t take care of them when we are sick or dealing with others who are sick so they get selfish with sleep, ect as a way to punish us.
    Gotta love them, but that doesn’t mean you can’t smack them around a little. 😉
    *OtterHuggles*

  58. Oh man.
    In my house, I’m the one most likely to be that kind of a jerk (not that it happens a lot, but I did get in trouble this morning for falling back asleep on the couch After Official Wakeup Time–though I did let her have at least another half-hour by allowing a short person to climb on me for much of that time–LOVE being woken up by warm preschooler pee on your pjs). ANYWAY, that sucks. I’m sorry. I hope the clue-mobile comes by your house today and there’s a foot massage waiting for you tonight.

  59. I hope you feel better soon. To your other question, are they thinking? Sadly some times the answer is “no”.

  60. I would knit you tissues if I could but all I have in the stash is Lopi wool and regardless of weight the tissues would be scratchy and rub your nose raw probaby worse than it is now and that would be no good, no good at all. Mind you! Your nose would be warm and who doesn’t like a warm nose?
    Get well soon and don’t tell anyone. This will garner some undisturbed knitting time as you sit on said sick couch wrapped in newly knitted Kansas shawl feeling fresh as a peach. Perfect.

  61. And the worst part is when they get sick. Then the world stops revolving and we are forced to listen to the endless moaning, complaining, and other foolishness. All the men I know, bless their hearts, think they are pretty tough but can be reduced to jelly by the slightest sniffle. I think that we are programed on an atomic level to love men regardless of their complete lack of logic in order to procreate the human race. What else could it be?
    I sure hope your cold goes away. I always get a doosy when it really starts to thaw around here. Usually only a really spicy soup broth helps but that’s just me.

  62. Take a stand. He should have been taking Meg to the dentist and he should have been out driving around looking for a 24-hour pharmacy to get you drugs. And he won’t know any of this unless you take a stand.
    Tell him to get moving or you will pack your knitting and move yourself into a hotel and where the nice bellman will bring you orange juice and Sudafed and tea.
    Drastic times and all….

  63. So is there anything around the house with a little lanolin in it that you could apply to that raw nose? Say, Joe’s gansey . . .

  64. Sending good vibes in hopes that you will feel better soon… and thinking you should give him a swift kick in the arse!

  65. I’ve got one of those too, and three kids too.By the way, I have a sick kid now. I know … Get well soon!

  66. Get better soon. You want that I come smack him for you? Men are idiots – all of them at some time or another. I’m sorry yours chose this morning.

  67. Oh honey, I’m so sorry you feel like s***. I agree with who ever said that Joe should have taken Meg to her appt (but Meg probably wanted Mom, huh?). Although my hubby is now well trained enough to not do something so insensitive, I know a lot of men who would think nothing of behaving so poorly, and ask you to bring back coffee and croisants, since, after all, you are going out.

  68. oh my goodness…yes, what is with men? I was going to mention how they act when they are sick, but i’ve been beaten to the punch!
    I think (not positive) this is the first time I’ve commented here. see, I just missed you being @ Threaded Bliss in Brentwood, TN last week. just missed it. because of an illness that at the very least equals yours, although of course one always thinks theirs was the worst! I missed Ann & Kay the Friday before because of said illness. I also missed that Thursday and Friday of work. Thus, when it came time for the Yarn Harlot @ my lys…I was a-working. bah. lol. anyway, I wrote all of this to simply say..
    I hope you feel better soon!! and kudos to you for actually being able to muster up the strength to take your daughter! next time your husband asks such things of you, leave the door open wide and make sure to slam some things around. I mean, really.
    .♥.

  69. I’m so sorry that you’re sick. It sounds nasty. Be well soon, sweetie.
    As for Joe. Harumph. I agree that it’s OK to give him a whack or two. His stupid gene was working overtime this morning. I love the comment about the clue-mobile; Joe really needs to get one!
    As to men in general, with extremely few exceptions, I refer to all of them as “Y-impaired”. Yes, it’s genetic, but that *doesn’t* mean that they can’t be trained. It’s harder that training kids. It’s harder than training cats (which, btw, can be done). But it IS do-able.
    Love and hugs.
    dee

  70. I am sending you a virtual care package herewith. It contains:
    – virus-whuppin immune-system mojo
    – several gallons of sympathy to go with your tea
    – a swift smack in the husbandly chops
    Hope you feel better soon.

  71. I’m sorry you’re feeling so bad. It must be all the travel and meeting so many people. Take care of yourself (as well as any wife and mother is allowed to take care of herself) and hopefully you’ll be better soon.
    Try to be patient with your husband. The poor dumb creatures can’t help it. It’s a combination of that d****d Y chromosone and the fact that they keep their brains in their pants where there’s not enough oxygen. Once, when I was sick, I had to stop and puke 3 times while dragging myself around to feed the horses and sheep. Then I had to lie down on the staircase coming back into the house because I got so faint. My husband came home from work and found me out there, made all sorts of concerned noises, told me that I should take better care of myself, and immediately asked what was I making for dinner. Had I not been so weak, I would now be informing you that I became a widow. Luckily for him I could only plan his demise, I didn’t have the strength to carry it out.

  72. So your husband and my husband are brothers, right??
    My dh snapped at me for not getting up *again* to give the baby his pacifier after he got a good 10 hours while I was up 5 times in my 6 hour attempt at what some call sleep.
    Yeah, it went over as poorly as you think.
    Feel better soon.

  73. I have found (having a husband, 3 sons, and mostly male friends and co-workers) that men have a ‘Y’ chromosome just to make the women in their life say, “WHY?????”. Take care of yourself Steph.

  74. Juice of 1/2 a lemon, 1tsp honey and a cup of hot water taken with 1 extra strength tylenol 3 times a day, as soon as you start to feel off. I haven’t had a cold in 2 years!
    My husband refuses to try this remedy he doesn’t believe it could possibly work. I guess he just likes getting sick!

  75. lol, I was just wondering this before I read your post!! I got up with the baby, brest fed her, gave her breakfast, and then woke up hubby so I could take a shower to go to work. He acted like it was an insult!

  76. Wow. That sucks. I hope you feel better soon. Would you like me to come over and smack him for you? Also, maybe you could swipe some pain pills from Meg after the tooth extraction. No? Well then, I recommend Nyquil. Lots of it. And blissful sleep.

  77. It is a SERIOUS MALE GENETIC DEFECT! The fact that any men still exist on this planet, due to this defect is nothing short of a mircale – in my humble opinion! I do sincerely hope you feel better soon!

  78. Hope you’re feeling better by the time you read this, Stephanie. Sounds like you have had a pretty miserable time of it.
    As for Joe, my guess is that he had no idea you were operating on no sleep and were feeling miserable. He sounds like a pretty nice guy, but even a pretty nice guy can miss some obvious clues when half asleep (in fact, even I have been known to miss some obvious clues when half asleep – and I definitely have two X chromosomes). I’m glad you didn’t smack him. 😉

  79. i went through a similar experience this morning with kevin. how i wished llewellyn(the squirming toddler that slept on my head, and kept me up half the night!)’s diaper had a big stinker in it to leave on sleeping beauty’s pillow and hope for a full facial roll over. splat! opps, maybe should take it out on my own blog….

  80. Steph – You ought to take Airborne every time you fly, not just when you’re sick. I have been doing that for over a year and have not been sick once (and I fly pretty often). I usually take it a few times the day of travel. It boosts your immune system with a flush of vitamins. I hope you feel better soon!

  81. Oh, take care of yourself, Steph. Go veg out somewhere. I haven’t checked the schedules — I hope that you have adequate time to recover and have a life before taking off again. 🙁

  82. Hi Stephanie,
    Sounds like you NEED Mucinex! Over the counter in the USA. In my book, it is a miracle drug. Take two in the am and two in the pm. I am an RN and I work in an allergy office. Sounds like you might have a few allergies! It is a very bad season. The only way to get through it feeling well is to take allergy meds and ,of course, Mucinex!! Hope you feel better! Sharon

  83. Poke him with a sharp size 9 straight and may he remember to never utter that again 🙂
    Get well soon!

  84. DUDE! Seriously. I *so* know what your going through with the man and the sleeping. Oh, and just a side note – laughing at your post with my boob in a baby’s mouth feels really weird.

  85. unfortunately i must report that i *have* been jerked around by a member of the same sex. my GF has been spoiled rotten by her parents and seems to expect the same of me, no matter my own health and/or state of mind. it happens no matter what type of relationship. sorry you feel so crappy!!

  86. Aaaarrg! Honest, Stephanie, you’ve done too well. Should have collapsed on the bed and sobbed your heart out. And left the shark there with all of her additional teeth in the mouth – she’ll have good use of them in the future to bite her own genetically-impaired specimen.
    Take good care!

  87. yes, yes yes..i have one at my house too.
    the baby just got over 2 weeks of having the stomach virus, didn’t sleep, nasty diapers, up all night and up for the day at 5am. i got the virus too and dh actually was mad at me for not “helping” to put the kids to bed one night, despite the fact that i had 12 hours of sleep total in 3 days and was sick myself…
    you can’t help but love them, or poke them with a knitting needle….

  88. I’m so sorry about the illness. Something similar has attacked my house, I’ve missed over a week of school and my mother seemed to have gotten it as well. Drink lots of tea and tell your daughters to go smack him for you! (you can never be to tired to delegate)

  89. Oh Steph, I’m so sorry you feel so badly! A friend of mine told me a story about how his grandmother handled the genetic tendency towards jerkhood in her husband. She waited until he was fast asleep, then sewed him into bed – just sewed the sheets around him to the mattress. Then she took a broomstick and made her feelings known.
    Of course, he was a pretty big jerk, so you might not want to go quite that far. I hope you feel better soon.

  90. Tea with orange brandy before bed, largish shot of orange brandy, works like a charm. Of course you sleep like the dead so someone else, i.e. Joe, will have to be responsible for you and the girls if the house goes up in flames or anything, but I think maybe he’s due for a night of being the one to stay semi-alert, don’t you? Feel better, Steph, and yes, all husbands are like that, unfortunately!

  91. I hope you feel better soon, and send a good thoughts to you from Japan. My recette for remedy is juice of 1/2 lemon, one peeled apple mashed, very bit of fresh ginger mashed, 1-2 table spoons of honey, and some water, all mixed and warmed in a pan. but you don’t have much strength to make it for now, I guess. Take care!!

  92. A dear friend gave me this piece of advice when I was complaining about the same thing 🙂
    “Remember, they are only men.”
    (In other words : they don’t get it, unless you act like/do what they do when they are sick.)

  93. There is no cure for anyone with so little sense of self-preservation. I hope you showed him how efficiently and LOUDLY the door could close!

  94. 1) Hot lemonade with honey. And a goodly proportion of something highly alcoholic. Nuke it till it glows, and keep drinking it as long as conscious. You’ll either start to feel better or rapidly become *un*conscious, which means at least you’ll get some sleep. Repeat whenever awake.
    2) And if feeling really evil, maybe some pepper on Joe’s pillow. At least he’ll be sneezing! Nahh, you wouldn’t do that to Joe, but it’s a cheery thought, innit?

  95. So sorry Steph! I hope that you get to feeling better, and the only thing you can wish for is that he becomes sick as well. Men! I know how you feel.

  96. *hugs*
    I was about to say you should make sure to share your germs with your loving hubby but then I remembered how men can be sick so I can only think of accidentally setting the alarm clock to the wrong time to be mean. However, I doubt you would be mean so I’ll just think healthy thoughts out your way in hopes of it working. Good Health, Good Health, Good Health…..

  97. Take Airborne and then make yourself a hot toddy and leave Joe with the house for a bit. Strong tea, lots of lemon and honey, and a healthy shot of Jameson’s Irish Whiskey does the trick for me.

  98. Neo-Citran with a shot of Screech mixed in.
    Then go to bed; go directly to bed, do not pass stash, do not collect knitting.
    Smacking Joe is acceptable if it will help you sleep.

  99. Mine blames it on his alter ego: Morning Scott (Precafeinated Scott).
    I still say its bullsh*t. Hit Joe when he least expects it.

  100. Okay, so my DH wrecked my car two weeks ago. He was as humble as I have ever seen him & declared I would not have to do a thing to get it fixed. Next thing I knew, he was calling me from work, telling me to drop off the car at the repair shop & the rental company would pick me up. After waiting 45 mins for a car rental company 2 miles away, I called him again. After another 15 mins the guy showed up. THEN, the CRC (car rental company) put the charges on MY CC (we have separate cards) and DH was upset that they gave me a luxury SUV(I didn’t want it anyway, my car is a hybrid for a reason!) but it was all they had. THEN, the car he brought back after exchanging the SUV for a P.O.C.(piece of crap)junker, the brakes started squealing & clacking (both, mind you, not just sqealing or clacking). Of course, why this didn’t occur to DH at the time he drove it home, I’ll never know. BUT, He tells ME to arrange to take it back & exchange it for, YET, ANOTHER RENTAL CAR from said CRC. So much for “I’ll take care of everything, you won’t have to do a thing or spend any of your money.” Hmmm, do they have job openings in your area for a transplanted, single, middle-aged, knitter that can take care of things on her own & never expect a miracle (like a DH who will follow through on a promise)??

  101. I’m divorcing one of those. After three years of getting up early every weekend morning with kids because my ex would be downright mean if his precious night’s sleep was in any way cut short. And I would look at him sleeping away and I could feel in my arms how satisfying it would be to choke the living daylights out of him.
    Somehow, the Y chromosome is under the impression that, due to its diminished stature, it needs more sleep than those of us blessed with extra “bits” (Grade 13 biology seems so very long ago).

  102. It is a “man” thing. When I call my girlfriends and am sick with ailments like yours, before I can even finish the first sentence, the phone is hung up, they have baked a ham, bought some comfy slippers, more meds, and ringing my doorbell to take my child to the dentist, scrub my toilets and hold my head while I am throwing up. My husband on the other hand who is amazing in his own way, keeps asking me he should be doing. Mostly I tell him “get out of the way”.

  103. I live with my husband, three teenaged sons and male dog. Definitely genetic. How to get even: BUY MORE YARN.

  104. I had an extra tooth too and my one of my other sisters has two. I hope you feel better *hugs*

  105. Yet another story to add to my long list of reasons why no male should be able to receive a driver’s license anywhere in the world until they have mastered and understand a course entitled “What The Word Considerate Means And How To Apply It – 101.” My brothers are considerate so I know it can be taught.
    I hope you feel much better soon.

  106. Joe, Joe, Joe. You are making it tough on the rest of us. Now I will probably get whacked because my wife can’t reach Joe to whack him. Sigh.

  107. I marvel at your ability to post a witty (and highly relatable) blog entry when you’re so miserable. Feel better soon!

  108. Hi Stephanie. You have my sympathies. If you have what I have then kiss the next couple of weeks good bye. I have been battling with this monster of a cold … that my husband decided he just had to share with me. He is now better and I am still sick. It has now been two weeks and a half. And I haven’t been able to do a thing … not even knit. Although I must be getting better though. Yesterday I actually knit 5 and a half stitches! At this rate I might be among those doing their Christmas knitting on the eve of the great event.(Remember me … I generally have my Christmas knitting finished by late summer!!!!)
    Hope you get well soon. There is hope … I think … that I will soon be on the mend as well.

  109. Men are chromosomally disadvantaged. It’s the “Y” chromosome that does it. All we double X’s spend our lives compensating for their disability. Let’s stop and see what happens!

  110. Feel better soon Steph! I’ve been sick lately too and it sucks. I recommend tea and toast and lots of knitting – and making Joe run all the errands for a few days.

  111. So sorry to hear you are sick. I will admit that I am very lucky when it comes to illness-my husband treats my like his little patient. Of course when he is sick he expects the same, and I don’t really think he understands it when I am more compassionate to the ill children then to an ill husband. I try my damndest, but since I never ask for much when I am ill-except tissues, fluids, cold meds and the big one, to be left alone-I get a little aggravated at his Oscar worthy “sicker than any human has ever been” performance. But I’ll stop griping now, while I’m ahead.
    And Meg? I had extra teeth too. 2 more were discovered when my wisdom teeth were extracted, on top of the 2 that were already removed before that. Don’t listen to mum, extra teeth are a sign of great intelligence more than great white sharkness. At least that is what I say. 😉

  112. Erm. I’m a woman and I am horrible at mornings, simply horrible. Also tend to talk in my sleep. So far the worst I’ve done is look up bleary eyed at my husband who was already up for hours when we both had a cold, and had just come in to check on me, and bleat “Lozenges!” imperiously at him. I’m still not allowed to live it down. No-one around her gets to give orders… except apparently I think I can when I’m sick.
    Hope you feel better soon. Sorry from the completely insensitive sleepers of the world!

  113. GRRRRRRROOOOOOWWWWWLLLLLLL…. BARK bark bark! try that in his ear and see what happens hehehehe
    revenge

  114. Big bummer! Prop yourself up in the corner of the sofa (oops, chesterfield) and take your choice of previously offered advice. When someone (and someone will) asks what’s for dinner, just give them “the look”. They all sound reasonably bright and should respond correctly!

  115. Thanks for the laugh, Stephanie-though I’m sorry it came at such a price…I am fortunate to live with a man who can sleep through anything. The downside is that getting him out of bed when he has to go to work or something can be a real project!
    Tell Meg she’s in excellent company-extra teeth run in my family. I myself had 6-count’em- wisdom teeth! I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how I spun that one(painful surgery notwithstanding).
    Feel better soon. I’ll send you some good mojo…..Kathe

  116. If you have a cough, take the Buckleys. Say it with me now, “EWWWWWWW that stuff is AWFUL”
    Keep repeating to yourself “I love the father of my children, I love….”
    Yeah, I didn’t think it would work either.
    Feel better.

  117. What’s even “better” is when you’re other half (fiance, in my case) is sick. The world has to stop and cater to them because they’re not feeling well. He’ll get his, I hope. Just wait until he gets sick >:)

  118. Boys are stupid.
    I think I’ve met your virus. It knocked me out for the first week of April. I hope you’re feeling better soon. I survived by taking decongestant and ibuprofen by the handful. And lying around moaning.

  119. Stephanie — I hope you get better soon. The comments are a revelation: men truly ARE pathetic. I thought it was just a series of poor choices on my part. As my mother used to say when aggravated by my father “I should have been an old maid and raised all my daughters to be the same!”

  120. I’m really sorry, but that just made me laugh hysterically. It all started with “spawn of darkness”.
    Hope you feel better soon!

  121. This morning I pulled my self out of bed after being up half the night with a crying 12-year-old who was having an odd pain that only I could repair. Hubby asked if I could be quieter as he did not have to get up as early since the younger was staying home and the older had no first ans second period. I just shut the door…a bit louder then usual.

  122. Recently my 4 year old stood by MY SIDE of the bed at 1am and announced that she didn’t feel good. She then took a step back (bless her) and threw up all over the floor of our bedroom. As I rushed her to the bathroom she threw up again. I cleaned her up, put her in our bed (where my husband slept soundly), and proceeded to clean up the carpet as best I could given that it is carpet and it was now 2am. In the end I just covered the spots with paper towels. I also fetched a bowl and some towels which were useful because she threw up 5 more times between 2am and 7am – when the sun came up and my husband awoke. He looked at us lying in the bed, got up and walked around the bed, looked at the floor, and said “did she throw up?” He’s still alive too.

  123. He didn’t need the self-preservation to kick in because he knew that you hadn’t slept and were barely conscious, and therefore didn’t have the strength to hurt him too badly.
    Hope you feel better soon.

  124. With a fever and the right jury, you would get off. Just sayin’…
    I hope you feel better soon and are able to get some rest.

  125. Poor Steph! I have been battling my monthly migraine this week, without even my sometimes missing a smart gene, too) hubby around. He’s on a business trip. It’s been real. It’s been fun, but it hasn’t been real fun. I’m right there with ya! Rest, rest, drink tea, and give Joe the evilest look you can muster! I would go along with the making his toothbrush germy thing, but you know that if he gets sick, you’re the one that will end up waiting on him hand and foot. Men are such babies!! But geez, who would mow the lawn if they weren’t around?

  126. I thought I was alone with the problem. Thank you for comming out of the closet with the undisturbed sleep syndrome.

  127. Feel better soon! One of my friends was woken up last night by her husband announcing that he couldn’t sleep. Several times. Periodically throughout the night.

  128. I was sick last night too, only I had it coming out the other end…like water. Seriously, I contemplated dragging in a foot stool and grapping my pillow and camping out all night propped up on the toilet. It seemed a reasonable idea at the time, probably about as sane as contemplating sensitivity training for hibernating bears err..spouses. I’m sorry your sick, I hope you feel better soon, I am.

  129. Yeah, I have one of those at home, too. And another small one he is training.
    The best part? When I or the child is sick, and sleep is non existent – his mom will call and offer to let her son (the one who should be looking after us) stay at her place until we’re better. Wouldn’t want him getting sick now, would we? (In all other respects, she’s wonderful. But this burns my arse).
    Going to go freeze some marbles, now!

  130. Once you get back from the Dentist office, kick Joe out of the bedroom, send him off with your to-do list and cold meds list and GO TO BED. Hope you feel better soon!

  131. I’m so sorry you’re not feeling well. Perhaps Meg’s doctor could give you a little something too, like pain meds. As for Joe, sneeze on the end of a DPN and place it so he’ll “accidentally” sit on it!

  132. Weird, Steph. I have three daughters (13 1/2, 16, 19) and the middle one had an extra tooth, too. Ironically (and I’m sure this won’t be the case for you….cough), the youngest is MISSING a permanent tooth. Which will result in expensive oral surgery and an implant.
    I’ve always wondered if there was some sort of celestial, before-they-were-born bickering that resulted in this little irony.
    Suz

  133. Still LOL! Yup, that’s marriage…lucky me, I had nearly forgotten about that part of it (divorced for a long time now). BTW, thanks for your email and all the info you provided. Wanted to share something I learned from Knitter’s Review newsletter today: MapMuse now includes a category for knitting/yarn shops. If you go to their website, think it is http://www.mapmuse.com (?), if not, just Google for it, and follow directions to get names and locations of yarn shops in any area you wish to visit or where you live. good stuff1

  134. Just cough on him. That would get him back. Wait! No, don’t do that. I almost forgot-when men get sick they become unable to care for themselves and we get screwed then too. Figures. Feel better soon.

  135. Steph-
    You’re due for some rest and relaxation. Hope you’re feeling better soon! But, before you, lick his toothbrush…wait, maybe you should only do that if you’re headed back out on the road in the next couple of days and won’t have to deal with the consequences!

  136. Sooo, soooo sorry. There’s a missing bit of DNA on the Y chromosome that makes them susceptible to that.
    And if you have it there, Neosporin + Pain has lidocaine in it – it heals your raw nose while also numbing the tender skin, and makes it possible to use tissues without wanting to cry. The ointment works best. (Gotta make sure it has the + Pain part!)
    Send Joe to get you some.

  137. Ouch. Perhaps you should gently remind him that if you had been in the bed beside him with the door closed to shut out all outside disturbances rather than selflessly spending the endless night tossing and turning on the chesterfield, not only would he have gotten the same amount of sleep you did (none), he would also probably now have the killer virus from hell. Just a thought. Hope you feel better.

  138. Oh, sounds like you have the crud that’s been going around here. Make Joe wait on you the rest of the day. Hope you feel better soon.

  139. My hubby is a jerk for about 5 or 10 minutes, until he actualy wakes up. Then he is a tedybear. Even if I make him play gin-rummy with me.
    Of course, he may be remembering an incident early on in our marriage that sparked a “I’m going to visis my mom for a few days” (and let you think about what you’ve done wrong) type of response from me. (it was of course about more than the sleep thing, but that’s what touched it off.)
    He’s kept his big fat mouth shut about being woken up ever since. 🙂

  140. ok… so maybe being single is not as bad a thing after all… LOL!!!
    I’m one of the semi-sick today – I can’t straighten my legs after doing step aerobics for the first time in almost a year tuesday night, and somehow that has caused my stomach to feel quite queezy and yuckky in sympathy for my cramped up calves…
    All I know is I do not want to go back to work today when my lunch hour is over…

  141. strangely enough I’ve found that the best “revenge” is passing the virus along to the worst offender. (I also think passing the bug along has something to do with not being 120% helpful to those who aren’t feeling well and taking one’s health for granted… have a tissue ready Joe.)
    I hope the oral surgeon’s apt went well; a few years ago I had numerous visits to one for the opposite reason – two of my (almost front)teeth are congenitally missing. It’s fun to casually mention that I have implants and then see people’s gaze drift down and look puzzled. “Too many teeth” is on my list for the perfect man, figuring that between us our kids will have one complete full set – no more, no less.
    I hope you are feeling better and snot-free soon!

  142. In agreement with others …. they’re missing a key part of their DNA that makes them prone to such loutish behavior. It’s the same bit of DNA that makes it possible for them to hear you only when they want to, and to somehow sleep through a child’s sleeplessness/crying/vomiting.
    It annoys the piss out of me.

  143. Oh Joe….what are we gonna do with you? See, I usually feel this strange sort of kinship with you (even though I’ve never met ya) cause I know we share a hometown. Heck, we might even be related somewhere down the line. As a fellow Corner Brooker and person-who-likes-Steph, I can’t tolerate this behaviour. I strongly recommend you go buy her something good. Reallllllly good. Right now. Run!

  144. Poor Stephanie.
    I once dislocated my knee after slipping on the kitchen floor when my husband was asleep. He woke up to my very loud, very profane shout, and was quite irked to realize that the house was not burning down. As the pain was making me nauseous, I asked that he hurry and grab me a towel. When he finally returned with one, he held it out of my reach and demanded to know if I’d re-washed the load of laundry he’d (attempted) to do. I almost barfed on his feet. You could try that.

  145. Airborne- really get some Airborne. if they don’t sell it in Canada get a few tubes of the stuff at a US drugstore on your next trip and take a dose every time you get on a plane (That is what it is for anyhow) It works really well.
    As for shark teeth- how is this for you: When my father was a young man it was discovered that he had a whole extra set of teeth. That’s right- a SET. (Both upper and lower). It is so rare that the University of Southern California (USC) dental school offered to extract them for free if they got to film the whole thing and keep the extra set of teeth. My dad, who came from a poor family when he was young, willingly agreed, and somewhere, in some vault at USC’s medical campus sits his extra set of teeth.
    Seriously.

  146. You’re sick, Joe isn’t. Why isn’t Joe taking the young Shark to the dentist while you sleep?

  147. Sorry, but I was laughing so hard, I forgot to show my sympathy/empathy. I have found that the very best thing to clear my sinuses is eating hot, spicy food, something either Chinese (best) or Italian. I repeat, this works better for me than any medication I have ever been prescribed (of course, when you feel that bad, it is difficult to raise any appetite, but Soup, hot, spicy soup (chinese) is my personal magic elixer. Hope you feel better soon. Hugs

  148. Oh you poor thing-feel better soon!! I’m laughing as I’m reading this because I’m pregnant (finally!!) and I’m the one that tells my poor sleep deprived husband to be quiet so I can get my fourteen hours! lol!! I’m sure he’s going to get me back!

  149. There’s this little guy who lives inside each one of us. His name is Charlie. He monitors the things that actually come out of our mouths. Charlie is in charge of making sure we don’t say stupid things like, “Did you know you have three bad teeth in the front?” or “You know, I really was first in line” (to a 9-foot gorilla).
    However, Charlie isn’t the most consciencious worker. He smokes, so he often takes breaks to step outside. These are the times when you ask yourself, “Was that my outside voice?”
    Joe’s Charlie must have been on break.

  150. I’ve tried to send chicken noodle soup through the Internet before and it just messes up the CD ROM drive so I’ll send you a hug and some get well wishes.

  151. Amen, sister.
    My husband is in the hospital (nasty, nasty stomach bug) and tried to leave yesterday against dr’s orders. All because he wanted a roast beef sandwich from Arby’s! He’d been cleared for liquids only – which is a bummer, but Sheesh! He didn’t leave – thank goodness – and he’s feeling better, but what a big silly. At one point he asked me for his pants out of the locker, but I told him that if he’s ready to go home, he can get his own damn pants. Men.
    I hope you are feeling better very soon! :)K

  152. A) feel better soon. I know that feeling! When you brought up the loose tooth feeling caused by sinus pain, I had to cringe. I know that feeling…uuugggg.
    B) whack Joe. Seriously 😉 THAT comment was deserving of some sort of flying object smacking him upside the head.
    C) I must have the world’s best husband because he has never done such awful things. He is just the opposite. After all our years together, he will STILL hold back my hair when I puke. HE is the one who will stay up losing sleep when I’m sick because he tries to take care of me.

  153. Get better! As for Joe–he’s been punished enough by all the comments. He’s a good one, and we all know it. (You notice he said please, even in his sleep. Male and sleep-oriented cluelessness is more endearing, in retrospect after the fact, when it was offered up sweetly.) I can just picture the conversation later: Honey, why didn’t you tell me you were sick? I’d have taken her in…
    But we women are so used to just doing what needs doing, regardless.

  154. Bummer about the bug. Have you tried ColdFx? It actually has double blind controlled trials to support it (I like those things.)
    My hubby used the “it’s easier for you because breastfeeding hormones make you immune to feeling pain and fatigue” angle. Two kids, five years on the boob – he got a lot of mileage out of that one, but now he’s gotta search for a new excuse.

  155. Oh, it seems so cruel to laugh at someone else’s misery. But when you put it like that, I just can’t help it. Really.
    Sending you “Clear Sinus” vibes…

  156. Get some sleep, drink a hot toddy or two, and you’ll feel better in no time. And as for revenge on Joe, I think the fact he is male is revenge enough…. although getting him to wait on you hand and foot for a couple of hours would be ok too.

  157. Wow. Just…wow. Next time I feel badly about my Spinster status I’ll just read all these comments again.
    Sorry you’re sick, Steph. If only there was a temple for the Knitting Goddess, then you’d have all the tea and rest you could handle.

  158. I’d have given him an enthusiastic kiss and a big hug, and not said a word…

  159. I have a solution for you (but not for the illenss – just well-wishes for that)! Calmly tell Joe (whenever you feel like it, even when he asked you not to disturb him) that (1) you are very sick, (2) you will not be going out today for any reason unless the house is burning down around your ears, and (3) he will need to handle… (follow up with a list. If you don’t have the energy to create a whole list, make it general, like “Every last little thing that comes up today other than my own breathing. And if it turns out I need help with that, you’ll be in charge of it until the ambulance that YOU call arrives”). Then lie down in the bed and let him deal. He will be okay.
    We women are often too subtle for men. They need to hear it plain and clear. Oh yeah, and you should yell at him a little for his insensitivity. Righteous anger feels kind of good.

  160. Awww! You’ll feel better soon enough! Oh… and I feel your daughter’s pain; I, too, had an extra adult tooth. Good luck at the surgeon’s, hopefully she’ll feel better afterward than you’re feeling…

  161. Men do not possess a Y chromosome. They carry a broken X chromosome. Explains a lot, doesn’t it?

  162. Hope you get better soon. I’d offer to send to fantastic drugs but a) Customs frowns on that type of thing b) You need it now c) Coffee isn’t actually a documented remedy for illness. Neither is wool or Screech. So here are good thoughts going your way. Take more of that tea and get the good 3-ply kleenex or a huge stack of hankies.
    Slip the shark some Tylenol #1 (doesn’t that have codeine?) and put her to sleep. Then go get some yourself. Put a note with some money on the table and tell them to order pizza.

  163. So sorry about virus Wes… Sorry also about your defective testosterone based unit… (mine just had a tune up… he actually woke up last night, realized that I’d been gone too long to still be nursing and CAME AND GOT ME so I wouldn’t fall asleep holding the baby and tweak out my neck…he doesn’t realize what a total turn on that sort of thing is for women…)

  164. He doesn’t know how lucky he is. In your situation, I would have got him to get up and take child to appointment because you are SICK and need to rest (not to mention not spread evil viruses)
    Hope you are feeling better soon.

  165. Hmm, well, I’m afraid my husband’s one of the ones that doesn’t do stuff like that. If it’s genetic, it can obviously be overcome by proper training. (No credit to me, he’s been like that since I met him). But, to train him properly, you’re going to have to stop being such a big ol’ softy.
    WHY are you the one taking the Shark to the oral surgeon? This should definitely be a Joe task if you are sick, for two reasons. One, you need to rest and recover; two, you are highly contagious and shouldn’t be going around spreading disease. If you can’t bring yourself to take care of yourself for yourself, than do it for everyone else (sorry about the repetition).
    I had that thing you have a couple of weeks ago. Missed two days of work then dragged myself in because I couldn’t handle the thought of having to catch up on more than two days’ worth. Still sniffling and coughing, as I thought it was allergies and didn’t take my anti-cold stuff early enough. But I agree with the Airborne for flying, and would add Boiron’s homeopathics for cold or sinus as an addition to the other stuff.
    I spent those two days on the couch, knitting, when I wasn’t sleeping. So I felt like I was at least getting something out of it. And hubby took care of all errands and left me alone (at my request) and never uttered an insensitive word. So toughen up, baby, and get that boy trained!

  166. First, feel better. Second, his remark makes you legally entitled to pampering. You lie on the couch, wrapped up in a nice afghan, and knit, or just contemplate knitting, while he does dishes, laundry, errands and btw gets you fresh water and hot tea every fifteen minutes. It’s his sentence for being male.
    Here’s my theory, for what it’s worth. If you look at the Bible’s story of creation, each day, something better comes along. Light, then land to stand on and look at the light, then plants to make the land pretty, then animals to entertain, finally man to manage it all (don’t get me started on the managing part). Then the Creator looked at man — and promptly made woman. Obviously, we are an improvement over the original defective model *grins*.

  167. So sorry you are sick. I would wish for Joe to get the bug but then he’d probably expect you to take care of him & wait on him hand & foot. My ex was like that – oh, I’m so sick, take care of me. Then I’d catch it from him & dontcha know he had to return to work while I stayed home with 2 toddlers! Not all men are quite so bad. My SO is very good about getting meds & mashed potatoes & applesauce (from Boston Market) when I am beginning to feel better. Not as comforting as a female would be but he at least tries.

  168. 1. Men can be horses behinds.
    2. Men can be usefull even at being #1.
    3. Inform Joe that this is the “worse” of better or worse.
    4. Tell Him to take care of meals, children, household.
    5. Do not tell Him you are well until 2 days after you are.
    6. Smile… don’t say a word just smile…
    7. Lots of Hot tea w/ lemon & honey. & a shot of whiskey.. hugs

  169. Poor Stephanie!
    Get well soon! I’m almost ashamed to admit that this scene would never happen at my house, because Daddy is always the one taking the rug-rats to the dentist etc, while Hi-Powered Executive Mum is out earning a crust.
    Of course, HPEM has to come home and do all the dishes every night, because NO ONE ELSE knows where we keep the sink.

  170. My Dearest Harlot,
    I read your post and realized what a truly desperate cry for love and attention that was made. Obliously the spouse is feeling left out of the wonder that is your life.
    It is times like these where the need is at it’s most pressing. The need to rip open the drapes, turn on the lights and rip the warm blankes off this person in oblious distress(sleep). They obviously have way too much time on their hands. Make them take the kid(s) to appointments/school. Let them make the lunches.
    Because really, it’s all about their spiritual growth.

  171. Hmm… perhaps it’s the lack of smacking that’s the problem. You should carefully remember this incident, and smack him for it when you’ve recovered and you have the energy. And carefully explain why you are doing so.
    Though men may be like dogs — if you don’t punish them right away, they don’t understand why you’re doing it.

  172. Hope you’re feeling better soon! Try Benylinn 1 all-in-one, it actually works. I thought it was hype until I gave it a shot – and it made all the difference.
    Oh, and get some sleep! Make Joe deal with the kids…*evil grin*

  173. Oh, feel better Stephanie!
    Maybe [understand, I have no kids, so am not sure of the feasibility of this] could you pretend you are on a yarn crawl, I mean, book tour, and pretend you are not there, so they can run ferral and fend for themselves until you are better? Like, if they talk to you other than to ask what they can do for you, just don’t hear them? My mom was able to withdraw from care for us, when I was about 12 [brother was 8], and I stepped up and made dinner as I often did because she taught me. And “he” has proven that he can do laundry if he runs out of undethings, so just let it all slide for a day or two until you feel better. I hope you can at least. Feel better.

  174. Looks like everyone has one of those kind of men in their lives … the kind who believe the world revolves around them and no other! After 39 years, I give up on trying to change the one I have (MAJOR annoying when he’s sick, and still MAJOR annoying when I am)! Thankfully, when I’m sick, I’m only too happy to shut the door on him and have the rest of the house to myself. Drink some warm milk with a tablespoon of honey, and a jigger of brandy or whiskey in it. The milk helps you sleep, the honey soothes your throat, and the whiskey makes you not give a damn. Works every time! Hope you feel better real soon.

  175. Keep drinking Yogi Tea, it does help. I have almost every type they make. I am sorry to hear you are not well. There are some nasty viruses going around. Trust me I know, I just took the last of my two, yes 2, medicines today (anti-viral and anti-bacterial) I do hope you do not have what I had. It was the worst thing I have ever, ever experienced. I cannot complain, my DH took great care of me and carted all 3 boys everywhere.
    Now rest, plenty of clear liquids and rest more.

  176. Sorry to hear you’re so sick! And sorry to hear that Joe is insensitive. I believe in karma — what goes around, comes around. His day will come, have faith. (And you just reminded me why I stay single (10 years now) after 19 years of marriage to another insensitive lout!)

  177. Oh. My. God! That is so damn funny! And TRUE!! I may post it on the fridge for my husband…as a warning.

  178. I had/have extra teeth, too! two extra sets of canine teeth (one extra set was pulled, the other dissolved in my gums before growing in), two sets of wisdom teeth (3 of the first 4 have been pulled, so I have 5 wisdom teeth right now), and three sets of the front two bottom ones (one set was pulled). I once had a dentist tell me it was impossible for people to have extra teeth. Never went back to him again.

  179. So sorry your so sick – if it makes you feel any better at all – I have three “men” here two of which are sick with the very same spawn of the devil virus you have right now – one more than the other – so maybe there is a balance in the universe? I’ll have to say that to mine when he wakes me up for the upteenth time tonight, coughing, and I’ll let you know how big of a hissy he has. My mother in law – who gave birth to mine, is convinced that there is but one male brain in the entire universe, and your man has it up until he says “I Do” and then it moves on to the next man wooing a woman. You see how that works?
    P.S. – you weren’t quite when you shut that door, were you?

  180. Um…. You’re the one who is sick. You’re the one who needs a really good night’s sleep to get better. And *you* are the one sleeping on the chesterfield and Joe the one in the BED?!?!?!?!
    A Y chromosome is an X chromosome with one leg missing. That’s where the empathy and sensitivity genes are. WE got ’em. Guys don’t!
    Sending warm, healing thoughts your way!
    Barbara L in MA

  181. Please get well soon Stephanie. These comments have been great therapy. I have been wanting to dump my superjerk of a husband for years, but need to hang on for a few more for the kids. I guess misery loves company.

  182. Say it with me…I love my husband despite his frequent forays into the land of stupidity. Mine did not like the gold and diamond ring I got him for his b-day. Go figure!

  183. Men are definitely the inferior species–it’s amazing there aren’t fewer of them in the world. I certainly don’t understand my husband, but of course, he doesn’t understand me either….

  184. I think I’d be inclined to say “well, since you’re up anyway, YOU take shark girl to the oral surgeon.” Then I’d pour water on his head. But I’m mean and vindictive like that.

  185. Mm, sounds like one of those days where temptation should have caused you to physically shove Joe out of bed and have him do all the things while you tended to Wes.
    But I don’t have a lot of experience with husbands and men’s inconsiderate natures because I’m still rather single. :/ Good luck, darling.
    By the way, I finished your latest book and I find it to be a real gem, particularly for the more timid of beginning knitters that I come across. Excellent job.

  186. I feel for you. Awful, miserable, I had it for 3 weeks. Try salt spray,,my sister who is a nurse told me to sniff salt water, YUCK couldn’t do it. But they sell a handy sprayer with salt water that really!! helps. I so enjoy your site and your adventures. I’m an old, “old” knitter who has rejoined the fold. Get well.
    Pat

  187. You know… I know just what you mean. And usually by the time we’re well enough to smack ’em, we’ve been distracted from our ire, moved on, forgotten, and they never get that valuable lesson.
    I hope you feel much better soon.

  188. The genes on the Y chromosome for making sperm used to live on the X Chromosome once upon a time and were responsible for making brain cells. So if you have ever thought that men were a little defective in the brain area and only thought with what was in their pants, you would be right.

  189. My dad tried something like that once, and only once. He was TDY (overseas with the military), and I had been deathly ill the last week or so that he was gone ( I was about 16 or so). Luckily some of our neighbors made sure that I didn’t die. Bastards. He walks in the door, and started yelling at me that the house was a mess. So I threw up on him. THen infromed him that he was late getting home, and he needed to take me to the hospital, my doctor would meet us there. Then threw up on him again. Ever since then, if I am sick, he is like a mother hen with one egg.
    Hmm…throwing up on my father has really solved so many probloms over the years.

  190. Oh gosh, I know exactly what you mean about men. One morning after being up with a sick baby all night I asked my husband if he’d get up with her (she was screaming for us from her crib). He rolled over and said, “Can you? I’d kind of like to sleep in.” Could.have.killed.him. Does he not know I have fantasized about sleeping in for years? Really, I had to leave the room before I inflicted serious bodily harm.
    But its okay, when dh says these types of super thoughtful things, all I hear is, “Go buy lots of expensive wool! You deserve it for being such a great mom/wife/human! Oh, and while you’re out, go get a pedicure!” It only took about 6 years of marriage before I realized that’s what he was really trying to say 😉

  191. Oh my god, your symptoms sound exactly like what we had at our house WHILE YOU WERE HERE IN ST. LOUIS! Ack! I stayed home to nurse sick kids instead of coming to see you. I comforted myself by thinking, “if I went and then Yarn Harlot ended up sick I would feel horribly guilty that she might’ve caught it from me.”
    Stay home and rest! I would send you a pot of soup (having made vats of it for the past week) if I could. My 6yo reports that sitting on your mom’s lap helps immensely.

  192. Poor Joe. Is he still breathing with all the bad karma coming his way? I hope he doesn’t read this and we are at least amusing you Steph!
    When I had our first baby, my hubby complained that I squeezed his fingers too hard during contractions. Ever since, when a child wakes up with the flu, I pretend to be sleeping. He is, after all, closest to the door.
    It all evens out, doesn’t it? Get well soon!!

  193. The men thing I can’t help you with. I think I’m the only girl on the planet with a husband that is only NOT a jerk when I’m sick (being a huge pain the rest of the time). Now the mutant virus…that sounds like allergies (being an allergy nurse I hear these things all the time) you should try an Allegra and glare menacingly at your front(and back for that matter) yard foliage as it the tree pollen that is likely the culprit (not at all saying that the spawns of darkness didn’t co-conspire to remove all cold medicine!). Hope you feel better soon!

  194. Hey! I think I just figured out why we haven’t taken over the world (aside from our shy, retiring natures) We’re too frigging tired from running the world for those well-rested men!
    Feel better (and tell Joe you can always go back out where you are appreciated).

  195. Resist the urge to use your needles for “evil”.
    Although, I don’t think bamboo would puncture anything serious – might keep him up though.

  196. So sorry you’re sick, Stephanie. All that you normally do, you have to stop til you get well. Women, unite! Train them to do what needs to be done! They may not ever empathise, but they can be taught how to behave. Think of it this way. A home can be seen as a military operation, each one has an area of specialization but if one is taken out, the next one steps up and takes their place. Really, if we did this, in one or two generations this problem could be gone! Think of it! (Amazingly, just recently I saw a presentation on the differences between men and women and the area of the brain that is active during empathy is more active in women than men, sometimes in men it doesn’t respond at all. Nothing. So yeah, they are different than we are. My personal theory is they are wired to not be sympathetic to whatever sabertooth tiger or wooly mammoth they are killing for dinner. )

  197. Steph- I’m pretty sure it is “spouses” and I’m absolutely sure it’s because said stupid person was not properly awake enough to filter thoughts before they became words and leapt at you in the cruel fashion. Before we had kids I used to routinely pour water on anyone husband, dog, random person that I deemed annoyed me. It’s harmless though entirely insulting. Since children though I decided to be a good role model and wait till they can run fast enough before teaching them this trick. If this seems too drastic and god knows who’d end up changing the sheets anyway….. you can keep a bag of marbles in the freezer for just such an occasion. They are perfect for waking someone up, no matter where you try to scoot away from them they roll right on with you 😉
    Love and Laughter,
    Amy

  198. stephanie- i hope you are feeling better soon!
    after years of research, er..relationships, i have determined that this kind of sleep-induced insensitivity is genderless. when i’m sick, my partner is super sweet and doting during waking hours, but while we’re sleeping, she’ll wake me up and ask “could you cough somewhere else?”
    i think joe owes you an apology in the form of yarn.

  199. Okay, this brought me out of lurkdom … Stephanie you are a saint … I have a habit of banging doors to let people know that they have p*’d me off … I wouldn’t have only closed _that_ door firmly, I would have gone through the house closing each and every door with the extra ‘umph’ that that comment demanded. Do feel better … I’m sure if you tried each of these cures, you’d be in the emergency department … be well! Put a bed in the back room and lock the door … you’ll have the wool and the internet and no one to bother you. 🙂

  200. Sorry to hear you are unwell. I do hope you a quick and speedy recover to whatever virus/illness that you have!!

  201. light and love surround you and yours. and we know who will take care of THEM when THEY get sick don’t we?
    p.s. maybe a teaspoon of tea tree oil in a two cup measuring cup of boiling water, if you have time to sit and steam that is>>>it always helps me. stinks and stings a bit but it helps me.

  202. Hope you’ll get well soon. And that the survival instincts of everyone else kicks in before that.

  203. The gene they lack is the same gene that makes us powerful women. Hence, they are doomed from the start. Get well soon! And don’t take any guff from anybody until then.

  204. Get well soon from another lurker, pulled out of hiding out of sympathy, (and a lesser amount of the same symptoms.)
    No DH of my own, but reports from my sister indicate there’s a guy in Texas with the same tendencies.
    My sister can sleep through anything, and has! So he considerately wakes her up when the baby cries. Never mind illness, advanced state of pregnancy or how often he’s already done it that night.
    She can count on her man to be there elbowing her awake. That’s love…

  205. Maybe he figuires since you have enough time and energy to sit around and knit and run this blog, you could allow the guy that funds your yarn and laptop a few extra minutes in bed……….

  206. Hello there,
    This last one was my husband.
    He’s kind of spoiled. (Or maybe it’s learned behavior????)
    Hang in there, we’ll be with you.

  207. Chinese chicken soup from your favorite takeout place, and hot lemonade with a slug of brandy for nighttime comfort, plus a cold med of choice. Nothing to be done now but duke it out with the bug. You must REALLY be sick – I can’t believe I’m the only one to have noticed…you’re not knitting. Get well soon and back on the needles. When you’re better, I have a question about blogging. As for Joe – well, he’s a man.

  208. October, 1990. After eight hours of induced labor, DH is watching the monitor of the device attached to me.
    Him; Oh, wow, the pains are getting stronger!
    Our childbirth instructor/ registered nurse who was on duty when I delivered told me that every man behaves the same way.

  209. hope you are getting some well deserved rest!
    something happens, i think, the minute you give birth to their kids… i’m not sure what it is, but it causes the behavior you mention.

  210. This is uncanny in that my husband I had a session of shrieky madness about sleep deprivation. Wishing you much restorative, wonderful sleep and more good tea! Take care, Ingrid

  211. Don’t these defective testosterone units (I LOVED that one!) realize that they have to sleep sometime and their lives are in mortal danger???? Sorry you are so sick Stephanie….I had it on Christmas and spent 4 days in the hospital….so be careful and don’t dehydrate. AND I vote for the Airborne…..they say it really works. in the meantime tea,tea, and more tea!! And thanks ladies for reminding me why I got a divorce in the first place and how really happy I am about it!!

  212. After the fourth night of cleaning my kids’ vomit, I am sad to say that I understand what you are going through. On the fourth morning, as my 3 year old is banging on my door saying she “choked on the bed” AGAIN I sadly rolled out of bed, and ran to her room to face A HUGE MESS, I yelled for my husband to check on her (because she was patiently waiting for me to clean her in the bathroom)and frantically started pulling the sheets off of her bed. I end up stepping in the stuff because I’m not wearing my GLASSES. get her bed made up and realize she needs a bath. Get that done, try my best to clean myself off and hop back in bed, where my husband is peacefully off in some dream. When he gets up for work, he says, “Did either one of the kids vomit last night?” AAAHHHHHHHHHHH
    PS I’m a multi-crafter…My blog is http://www.myspace.com/cocacolas1980
    and my crafts are http://www.myspace.com/beccascraftsforall

  213. You are speaking my language! I have an almost-4-year-old and a 3-month-old both of whom insist on being plastered against me all night long. My husband still grumbles when I want him to get up with the older kid so I can sleep in for one miserable hour. As with you, I am too tired to kill him.

  214. Hope this might make you feel better…your new book arrived today and I read it all – straight through. It’s hilarious! It’s brilliant!
    Get well soon! 🙂

  215. I would swear you were living at my house … Different man, same behaviour. I wish I understood why it is. ARGHHHHHHHH.

  216. I hope you’re feeling better- you know its bad when your hair hurts! Hope Meg’s tooth removal went ok too. Sending feel-better thoughts your way!

  217. I agree with Susan. Why couldn’t Joe take Megan for her appointment so you could get some rest? And on the way home, he should have picked you up a little bunch of flowers to cheer you up. Or popped into your favourite yarn shop for a few balls of sock yarn…I guess I’m dreaming. Why is it that when men get sick, the world stops? I hope you feel better soon. You’ll need your strength to sit up and read all your comments.

  218. The conversation turns to the male sectors of our homes when the four of us get together to knit. Two of us have husbands so wonderful that really should be considered romance novels, not men. The other two of us are married to works by Stephen King. The contrast is shocking. And the two with the wonderful husbands simply can’t get their heads around the existance of the dark side. And they accomplish lots of great knitting. The two of us who live in darkness are lucky to get socks off the needles.

  219. Is “Maybe @ 11:03pm” serious? Funds your yarn and laptop???? I guess doing the laundry and cleaning and the countless meals don’t count for anything, not to mention everything else that goes into being a mother.
    And writing three books? Guess you were paid in chicken feed.
    Now quit ‘sitting around’ and knitting/writing the blog…we know all the ‘free time’ you have. Not like you haven’t been on a book tour or anything.
    Sheesh. Some people! Maybe “Maybe” will be brave enough to use their(his) name next time? Where is Rams when we need her quick wit???

  220. oh geez, i feel like such a heel. i recently told my husband, who was waking at 4am after about four hours of sleep (in about two days) too please not turn on the light in the hall and wake me as he was getting ready for work. And he is so nice he actually APOLOGIZED to me!!!! Boy…i am a jerk!! Thanks (and that is not sarcasm…i am being sincere) for pointing it out….head hanging in shame.

  221. Teresa………I wonder if “Maybe” is a man who snuck in here and has been lurking around in dark corners, waiting for us to malign the good name of the men of this world so he would pounce in with the sarcasm???? if it was a woman obviously she has no husband, no children and no COMPASSION !!!!
    Get well Steph……we love you!!! And lord knows we need you to lighten our days with laughter!! You have a true gift!!!!

  222. My last bout of that lasted 2 months – many doctor visits, much medicine, and lots of my moms cough med. – wiskey, honey, lemon – mix it up put it in a jar that you keep by you and sip — now I am not sure if it actually helps or if you sip enough you just don’t care how bad you feel — but I swear by it.
    on men — I broke my shoulder in three places – had surgery to put screws in to hold one section together – and DH (not dear at that time) would do the laundry (only because I couldn’t carry the basket up and down the stairs) but would deposit it next to me for me to fold the clothes. And just how stupid was I that I actually DID it????
    They are all alike…..

  223. Poor lil’ lamb!
    Sending nice cool cloth thoughts for your head and a suggestion for DAYQUILL to make you feel a little better…
    As for the DH (that stands for DEAD HUSBAND in by book), well, I actually snorted coffee and nearly had to be resuscitated by my anesthesiology buddies! As I revived, I was shouting, ME TOO! JUST LIKE HIM! SAME THING! I decided that this deserves an entire blog, so in the next day or two, come over to mine, and you won’t feel so alone!
    Feel better and KNIT ON!

  224. Now, you need to know that my neighbor and I are trying to decided whether you actually closed the door on your way out the second time. After an in-depth survey of Women Who Have Been Happily Married For A Long Time (ok, the two of us talked this over yesterday), we both agree we would have been more than tempted to leave the dang thing open after the complaint…you know, you might have lacked the strength to close it and all. (Hee hee) Hope you’re on the mend!

  225. I hope that today finds you feeling better!
    Men and employers. “Are you sure you can’t drive a bus filled with children? I know you’re nauseated and dizzy, but we really need you!”
    And to make it worse, they’re women too!!

  226. Oh! My mom the herbalist sent me something from one of her many herbalist groups that I just happened to run across yesterday. If you’re still congested, try alternately pushing against the roof of your mouth with your tongue and between your eyebrows with a finger. This rocks the vomer bone in your skull, which runs through the sinus passages, ever so slightly. After about 20 seconds (so sayeth the article), you should feel your sinuses start to drain.
    Hope you feel better soon!

  227. Send those ingrates out with this list. Theraflu FIRST! Echinacea Cold Care an okay second. Bath & Body also has a Eucalyptus thing. It comes in the form of cubes that you put into your bath. Put it in a vat of boiling water instead. Remember the goat? Same intensity except it will smell like eucalyptus and you will be able to breathe. Go to bed. NOW! Pull the covers over your head. Threaten everyone with contagion. And stop everything.
    Yes. Even knitting. You can have it nearby though. For comfort.

  228. Feel better. I will think of you from the warmth and sunshine of the Maryland Sheep & Wool Festival this weekend and time with Judith McCuin. (Did that get the blood stirring?! Hope so.)
    Evil Kim

  229. Feeling lousy, drinking buckets of tea, irritation at hubby. Yup, you’re sick. Nothing to do but feel miserable for the next ten days. I’m, so sorry.
    Guys are just different. I don’t know if it’s nuture or nature. We raise them after all and we do treat them differently from our daughters. I love mine but sometimes that 2 x 4 (to get his attention) comes in handy along with shrieking, “you did what!”.

  230. Dear Joe, Tell Stephanie those secret things you alone know will make her feel better. Wishing speedy recoveries for all. Blessings, Julie

  231. Sorry to hear you are under the weather. Just think, (as I often do)had you killed him the first time you wanted to, you’d be out of prison by now….;->
    Feel better!
    Ang

  232. I have an exhusband and an exwife. I’ll take living with another woman anytime. I, however, am currently and probably for a long time to come, married to a guy. He’s a sissy. Love him but he’s a sissy. I try not to compare men and women. It’s like apples and oranges.

  233. Hello! My name is Kristine, and I’m a newbie to your blog, although I’ve heard about you for years (how could I not) it’s only been in the past few weeks (I work in an ICU and it’s the slow season, so to speak) that I’ve been able to catch up on your adventures.
    Anyway, I just thought I’d say, having shared my bedroom with both same-sex and opposite-sex partners — yeah, they’re both pretty damned inconsiderate. My favorite is my boyfriend’s latest trick, which is as I’m rushing around at 6:30am, trying to make sure that I get to work in clothes (matching is a secondary issue that I deal with after the first cup of tea), he’ll lift his sleepy head from the pillow (where he’ll get to keep it for the next three or four hours) and ask me to feed our cats so they won’t wake him up.
    -.-
    Anyway, he’s the most accepting of my knitting habits (not terrified about the bedroom closet full of yarn, the inumerable projects organized strategically around the living room couch to look like art) so I think I’ll keep him. Also, he’s slowly being converted. He has felted slippers, and thinks that some handknit socks would probably be nice. Possibly “a hoodie” (if I call it a sweater, he says he won’t wear it knit in “a color that won’t embarrass me if Tim drops by”.
    Plus, he laughs at all the blog snippets I’ve read him, even though he’s sort of sketchy on what it is I’m doing with those sticks anyway. (We’re currently working on the difference between knitting and crocheting). Clearly, he’s a keeper.
    I’ve been wanting to leave you comments on posts that are literally years old, so forgive my longwindedness.
    Anyway, it’s nice to say hi. 🙂
    –Kristine

  234. Hi! Thanks for the comment you left on my blog about my Diamond Fantasy Shawl… it one of my favorite things I’ve knit in a while.
    Also – glad to hear you are feeling better – I think all husbands are the same when it comes to their sleep. My husband couldn’t sleep last night so kept on twiching his feet all night – continually waking me up. AUUUUUUUUGHH. Then, when I mentioned this morning that I was tired – he was like- Why? You slept like a rock star all night! grrrrrrrrr.
    I think the red sweater is perfect for a little boy – but yes – I tend to not make lace for boys. But I wouldn’t classify that little eyelet as lace – more as a ‘cable feature’.

  235. I feel your pain . . . last night, as I lay dying . . . all I could hear was hubby yelling at the kids to be quiet because Mom wasn’t feeling well. oh, how to tell him: “Darling, it was not their voice that had woken me from the first solid sleep I had had in five days.” I love him dearly, but sometimes . . .
    I thoroughly enjoy your blog. Hope you feel better soon.

  236. Poor girl. My hubby is the exact same way. I know somewhere in that narrow mind of his there is some common sense, but he just refuses to amaze me. I really hope you get to feeling better. And hopefully your spouse gets the hint that maybe he might be kind and not be so selfish, and let you try to get a bit of sleep.

  237. This is what I don’t understand, but it does confirm that the whole “guy thing” MUST be genetic…we mothers strive to raise boys in such a way that they will not become one of THOSE men. And yet, despite our best intentions they seem to end up basically the same. It’s not necessarily a lack of character (my husband is truly wonderful)…it’s just that certain something that makes them so very very stupid!!

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