The way things are

There are some truths. Things that just are the way they are, and no amount of desperate human optimism will change them. Allow me to demonstrate.

The guys showed up with the new stove. I went out front to meet them. Here is what I said:

Hi guys. Sorry it’s so hot. Can I get you some water? No? Awesome, we’ll just get this beast in, eh? Listen, the front entrance to the kitchen is only 66 cm.

Here is what they said:

Oh, )*&^%^&. This stove is like…..

Me:

76 cm. I know. It’s going to be a bit of a problem. I think I’m going to have to ask you to come around the back where the garden door is 86 cm and the kitchen door is 72 cm. We’ll still have a problem, but if we take off the knobs, the door and the drawer, to get down to less than 72 cm it should work.

Them:

72 cm? Oh. That’s fine. That’s really ok. We can do that.

Me:

No. It’s not fine, and you can’t do that. 72 is smaller than 76. It won’t fit unless we take it apart.

Them:

No, no. We can get it in. 72 is only a little smaller.

Me:

Sure, but it’s still smaller. Smaller is smaller. Always. Stoves aren’t squishy, this really isn’t variable. Allow me to show you figure A.

Figurea2606

See how 10 is bigger than 9? See how there is no way that 10 can be made smaller than 9? We need to take it apart.



(I also reflected briefly on the wonders of the human ego that we think we can overcome truths if they are only small truths. It’s incredible. Here are two full grown humans who think they can alter physical laws (10 is more than 9) because they are SMART. )

Them:

We’ll try. You might be surprised at what is possible.

Me (inside my head)

Even though I am a generally optimistic person, I would be very surprised if 10 turned out to be less than 9. Off you go boys.



It came through the garden door.

Stoveinone2706

and then they tried to make 10 less than 9.

Stovenotin2706

As I suspected, ( I would direct you again to figure A.) this was not possible. This was, to the stove movers, a devastating truth.

They started brainstorming.

Them:

What if we moved your desk here so that we could put it in straight? If we could swing the back around….

Me :

10 is more than 9. It is more than 9 all the time. It is more than 9 at the top of the door, and it is more than 9 at the bottom of the door. 10 is more than 9 even if you swing the back around. We should take it apart.



Them:

Oh, I know. We’ll tip it and go diagonally.

Me:

Let me show you figure B.

Diagram2606



If an cube is 10 by 10, then if you take the diagonal, it is even more. It is 14 (roughly). That won’t work. 14 is more than 9. Always.

We should take it apart. The only thing that is smaller than 9 is numbers less than 9, like maybe….8. If we take parts off the stove, it will be less than 9.

Them:

Let’s try tipping it.

Me:

???

Them (Sweating and straining in the 43 (109F) heat) :

This won’t work. I think maybe 10 and 14 are both more than 9. I think no matter what we do, 10 and 14 are more than 9. I think we might not be able to get it though here.

Me:

Really? That’s a real shame. What could we do?

Them (Upon huge reflection and several checks with a measuring tape to make sure that the stove was still 10 and the door was still 9)

You know what? We should take it apart.

Me:

Good idea. This is why they pay you the big bucks, eh?

Newoven206-1

501 thoughts on “The way things are

  1. Hey, you got to be right and you got a gorgeous stove, too! I envy you your gas one. I’ve had only electric for more than 20 years and I long for an actual flame to cook over. Enjoy!

  2. owowowowowow…my eyes are twitching…too many memories of college algebra returning…must go pet silk and/or merino.
    (psst: stove totally rocks!)

  3. This makes me think of a cartoon I saw on an office-mate’s desk yesterday. It was set in a board room, but seems to apply everywhere.
    “That sounds like a wonderful suggestion, Ms. Trimble. Now if we could just get one of the men to make it…”
    Ahhhh, (delivery)men. Ya gotta love ’em.

  4. Ah, the joys of having things installed. I usually try and go bury my head in a convenient sand-filled bucket when I have to have new appliances put in. Still, that’s one heck of a nice stove!

  5. Oooo, stove porn. (Ya know? At “diagonal” I might have believed guys who do this all the time might know something I didn’t. And yet.)
    Want to come help move the dead, moldering, ten-ton, cat-eviscerated sofa-bed out of our puny back room?

  6. what a pretty stove, please oh please do not turn it on until the temps go down!
    πŸ™‚

  7. It’s gorgeous! Looks like it was worth it. Enjoy your new stove, and bask in the glow of once again being right.

  8. Welcome home, new friend to Mr. Washie!
    Your schematics are hilarious. We had the same problem with getting our washing machine into the basement. 12 months later and we still haven’t put the bannister back up, so every load is a “trek of death” to the laundry room.

  9. A very lovely looking beast! Glad it finally made it in. Any dings to the walls/ doorways etc before their belated revelation that it should be taken apart first?

  10. Oh, but it’s such a pretty stove! I’m glad they decided that they had to take it apart without any prompting! πŸ˜‰

  11. Beautiful new stove/oven! And your charts are beautiful… you must have some kind of chart/math experience… tee hee

  12. I’m laughing out loud. It’s not just stoves. You’ve neatly described the current roadblock in the deal I am trying so very, very hard to close this week.
    P.S. — I’ve got a Dale baby sweater going here in the office. Sweetest little thing you ever saw. I pull it out during conference calls while the boys argue about 10 and 9. It takes the edge off.

  13. How men’s minds work, huh. Glad your house didn’t get taken apart. Oh, that stove is a beauty and may I hope it is a joy, if not forever, at least a loooong time. Now you can go back to your knitting etc.
    Oh, I noticed you cleaned behind the old stove before you took the picture, was it bad? I’m sure that mine is horrificly dirty and with lots of dust cats, lion sized. LOL

  14. Squishy stoves do not exist
    Even movers have to acknowledge this.
    When 10 is less than 9 I fear
    The world will tremble and yet the Seers
    will proudly say…
    At least you get to cook today!

  15. Next time just whap em over the head with the notebook. Hammer modulation. If it won’t work, hit it harder. lol
    BTW – absolutely adore the tile work behind the stove and lower cabinets. Care to come do mine? I’ll take you jet skiing as payment.

  16. The stove looks really nice. I’m sure you’ll love it once you start using it. I also really like tiles in your kitchen.

  17. It’s a sad, sad day when you’re called upon to be the math genius in the room *ducks* Seriously, though, that’s a GORGEOUS stove! Your old one looks a lot like our current one, so now I have a very jealous mental picture of what a beauty like that could do for *our* kitchen. SWEET! (Love the mosaic work, too…meant to say that yesterday).
    Aren’t you glad that you can cook up a storm, now that it’s 100+ degrees out? Because you know, it’s so much fun baking stuff during a heat wave πŸ˜‰

  18. They didn’t listen. You are a woman. You aren’t supposed to be mechanically more inclined or mathematically superior… *sigh*… (er, no offense, but it was even very simple, basic math!!!)
    Beautiful stove…!

  19. *giggle* And the knitter’s version of that is, upon looking at an obviously too short length of yarn, “yeah, that should be enough to bind off the last row.”
    It’s 96F (~40C) here in Massachusetts. I ain’t goin’ near a stove till the heat breaks! I tried working on pair of socks last night and gave up! Yarn and needles do *not* play well with sweaty hands!
    All good luck with the new stove! It’s a beauty!
    Barbara L in MA

  20. It looks so authoritatively efficient there I’d be tempted to fire it up despite the heat.

  21. And you thought muggles were a bit hard of hearing. There was no knitting involved here adn look how things went. Teenages are more reasonable.
    Despite it’s unplanned arrival and the resulting yarn diet, your stove is lovely. It’s shiny. And it will still be fantastic adn teh gizmos will stil work in the fall when it is cool enough for you to use it for more than making tea.
    Did you spin yesterday?

  22. Nice stove! Bummer on the brain-trust delivery guys. As long as the ending is good, right?

  23. Gorgeous, gorgeous kitchen. You’ll love baking with your new stove, compete with temperature control, in five months. You know, when it’s cool again.

  24. Men are confused by the actual size of an item and the delusional size of an item.
    I won’t apologized because we all thought it.

  25. Now that’s one beautiful stove (with a particularly lovely tilework backdrop). But *ow – my head* geometry! How come I, who passed geometry by one measly point, understood what you were saying without even needing the diagrams?

  26. Smart move not telling them you know your measurements because you knit, they never would have listened to you then.

  27. At least it fits in the stove hole in the kitchen. Otherwise, they really would have had problems.

  28. That’s awesome. Maybe you could taking this knitting humor genre and make math humor a spinoff category πŸ™‚

  29. Oh my, that is just too funny. Why do they have to make it so much harder than it is?!?!?! It looks good though! πŸ˜€

  30. Ya know . . . I totally get your math thing with the stove. You seem very resolute about measurement. But how come, then, the “guage thing” is such a fluid measurement concept for you. (o:

  31. That’s *complete* with temperature control. If only I had typing control!

  32. Wow, what a brilliant looking stove. I am sure it will provide you with a great many tasty and warm things! Have fun figuring out the gadgets

  33. I need to know – are you in love with it yet or will that come with the cooler weather? (It’s beautiful.)

  34. The stove is lovely. The men were hilarious. Why is it that they never listen to what we women say? Thanks, I so needed a laugh!

  35. Nice looking stove. I installed stainless steel in my house as well. I think the same two delivery guys brought me my washer and dryer (Either that or they have twins or cousins here in California). In my case, they spent an hour trying to figure out how to get the washer and dryer through a narrow gate as I repeatly suggested that it might be easier to bring the appliances in through the large open garage door at the front of the driveway and out of the 36″ wide door in the back of the garage which leads to the back yard and the laundry room. They finally got it.

  36. I’d generalize and say “men” but Kerwyn is an engineer (and also a “man”) and he would have had everything measured, planned out and screwdrivers ready to take knobs & doors off.
    All’s well that ends well as they say & the new stove looks quite at home!

  37. When did my husband start delivering stoves? I hear that argument all the time. “No worries, I can make it work…”

  38. Looks great. I’m still in love with your backsplash. I know that a strange thing to be in love with, but there. I’ve said it. I’ll say it again. I’m in love with your backsplash. It’s cooler/less humid in MN today…perhaps our weather is heading towards you.

  39. Lovely stove. So shiny. (We are like magpies here; we like shiny things.) I had this problem with a drier once. Or was is the washer? I can’t remember. Either way, we had to go back for a different model. The washer (or drier) apparently had a history of not fitting into people’s houses, but the salesperson didn’t warn us to measure ahead of time. It was our first house; we didn’t know to do this ourselves. We DID know to check the size of the outflow pipe for the washer and get that replaced to a bigger size ahead of time. At any rate, I was not happy. Mountains and mountains of laundry and no washer (or drier). Older houses and new appliances are often a bad combination.

  40. wow! what a sharp-looking stove. it would make me want to bake and cook something, even in this heat. although it might also be nice to just sit and look at it (it is Very Cool) with a glass of iced tea. there is one thing i have to mention however: the first thing you do, you woman you, is apologize for the heat! it is not your fault! we are not supposed to be taking blame for things anymore. so stop that. and enjoy your nice new stove!

  41. You know, I lived in FL for a long enough time before moving back to a place with 4 seasons (most of the time) and there’s one thing I took with me. The southerners had figured out that you could mostly insult people and they wouldn’t even realize it as long as you included the phrase “Bless their/his/her heart” in there somewhere. Try it.
    “Those poor stupid delivery men, bless their hearts, tried 4 or 5 times to get that stove in through the doorway even though I tried to tell them it wouldn’t fit. Then, bless their hearts, they finally listened to me and we got it.”
    Doesn’t even sound mean, does it?
    The new stove does look really cool though. How many more days until fall baking can start? I want some pumpkin cookies.

  42. It looks beautiful! I know what you talk about when the old applicance was perfectly acceptable and you feel like you don’t “need” the fancy one, but give it a week.
    And serves them right to struggle in that 109 heat for not listening to you….

  43. hahhahahahahahahahahahahahaha Y I B, 10 is bigger than 9! hahahhaahaha
    I’m glad to see that you got your very nice 76cm stove into your beautifully tiled kitchen πŸ˜€
    and, 109 in CANADA?? That’s hot, even by our standards… and I’m in Vegas!! It’s only 105 here today!

  44. I fear you won’t get much knitting done while you figure out all the bells and whistles on that baby. Anyway Tis too darn HOT right now to turn that sucker on and experiment with it . Good job lads, at least you got it in there, I bet they had a story to tell their respective spouses when they got home. Thanks for the laughs Stephanie. Stay cool.

  45. Looks like a slightly higher-end version of our new stove, which I love, now that I’m used to all the button-pushing to control the oven.
    We had a sideboard delivered. The delivery folks came inside first, measured doorways and asked where it was going, went outside and discussed a few things amongst themselves, got it out of the van and into the house without any damage to themselves, the doorways, or the sideboard. They were models of speed, accuracy, and efficiency, and they were both women.
    But in all fairness, the two burly dudes who delivered the large heavy new fridge also did a nice job. Even though they parked a few houses down and had to carry the thing up the street (using some elaborate shoulder straps).

  46. Stoves aren’t squishy.
    I will be quoting that for a long, long time.
    (Um, Kathy, I don’t get the impression that they ever actually listened to her. I think it just took them that long to arrive at the conclusion themselves, in the assurance that the idea was entirely original.)

  47. I snickered when one of the big bosses told us yesterday that some leadership trainer taught him that you need to tell people something at least 7 times before they hear you. Your stove movers clearly illustrated that I shouldn’t have been snickering.

  48. What a beautiful stove. I guess if I had one like that, I’d have to actually cook or something…Funny, you were the THIRD person I “know” tha t was buying a new stove yesterday because the old one died. You think maybe there’s a stove virus or something?
    I LOVE your tile in the backsplashes. Did you do that yourself? very lovely.

  49. That is hilarious, and oh so true!
    Love the mosaic backsplash – did you create it? Can we have more closeups of it, perhaps with a sock?

  50. I commend your restraint in not taking the stove apart yourself. The new stove does look smashing.

  51. Well, at least it’s pretty. And I absolutely love the “backsplash”, did someone call it? So so beautiful!

  52. Oooooo – what a pretty stove. I would want to never use it & just admire its’ loveliness! Your kitchen cabinets look exactly like ours – maple Mission style – I love the simplicity of them – lets the beauty of the wood shine through (& since we live in Oak Park, where Frank Lloyd Wright had his home & studio & which has the largest concentration of his buildings, Mission style seemed appropriate).

  53. Steph, at least they didn’t try to disassemble your doorway! Or pat you on the head and say “Don’t worry little lady. We do this for a living!” (Yes, this is the bitter voice of experience!)

  54. I agree with commentor above the stove does look ‘authoritatively efficient’…I would have to salute or salam or mumble words of wonder.
    Tilework is quite special. Delivery people; some do not listen very well.

  55. I find myself flashing back to the eerily similar delivery of a washing machine that involved the removal of a bannister from the basement stairs. I actually stood hovering with my electric screwdriver for the 20 minutes that the delivery men spent trying to make the washer be smaller than the staircase. Once they actually agreed to let me take my bannister off my staircase the thing was in the basement about 5 minutes later.
    That is a lovely, shiny stove.

  56. sadly, I have encountered this phenomenon on all too many construction sites!!! I’ve even seen grown men try to get water and/or sewage to flow uphill without the aid of a pump…
    maybe it was the heat…

  57. We had a similar thing happen with a box spring 80″ wide and an opening 79.5″ wide. Sigh. We really really really should have measured that opening *before* bringing home the box spring.
    It does look quite nice now that they succeeded and its in place. I hope you have many happy no-problem years with the new stove.

  58. I have sadly had the same argument with a sweater. Something about stitches per inch and it not fitting right…..
    when your right your right. It’s just math nothing at all to get emotional about….
    Love and Laughter,
    Amy

  59. Oh my goodness! That is TOO funny! You’re new stove is beautiful, though. But I have to wonder if maybe they’d have listened if Joe had reminded then that 10 is more than 9.

  60. Oh my gosh! This is hysterical and this very conversation/situation is applicable to almost every single life experience. Do you think it’s just eternal optimism? Or is arrogance? I prefer to think that when I listen to my children tell me that, yes they know they haven’t cleaned up the Legos the last gazillion days when they said they would but THIS time they really will and I say, “okay, but right after swimming!” that I’m being really optimistic. I mean, they PROMISED, right? But later that night when I embed one into the softest part of my instep, I vow not to get suckered in again. Until the next day… Ah, the human condition is hilarius.
    (The comments about this being exactly like not knitting a swatch made me laugh out loud.)

  61. It looks wonderful. Funny how people often think they can still make things work even when it’s obvious they can not.

  62. OK, stove porn is almost as good as yarn porn. It’s so shiny! And it’s still gas! I have the sudden desire to cook that I haven’t had since May (hot in MN, too).

  63. Mom always figured it was they guys who couldn’t do math who ended up doing that so of heavy moving…go figure…Oh, wait! They CAN’T figure…sheesh!
    Anyhoo, I envy you your lovely stove, even if I could currently bake cookies on my dash and fry eggs on the walk and therefore wouldn’t even consider getting within a 10-foot radius (oh, wait..another math term…) of anything that is meant to generate heat. Now, an ice cream maker might come in handy at the moment….

  64. Use it in good health! but… we’re all still waiting for the Tale of the Tiles…please enlighten us.

  65. Too too funny! Thanks for the belly laughs Stephanie! And the new stove is gorgeous, all shiny and non grubbed up and all. πŸ™‚ Wonder how long it will stay that way… Love the backsplash too. Very Stephanie, I’d say, very Gemini and my twinnish. :O) Good job stove guys! Super listening! My copy of Knitting Rules arrived today along with a bumper sticker and a bookmark added by the seller. :O) I think the gang will have to make their own dinner…… samm your much older twin.

  66. Does this bring back memories! The Christmas when my mother broke her hip, my fridge died. No fridge made would fit into the space, so I had to get a stove to fit where the fridge was and a fridge for the stove space. Delivery guys came. Old stove could not fit through door to be removed and new fridge would not go through the door to go in. They said, “You want us to just plug in the fridge in the dining room?” The company sent their installer to solve this. (Just one guy.) He and I dismantled old stove. I got to throw parts into the front yard. He took the fridge apart (who knew so much came off!) and we shoved. It went through the door, but the cabinet was in the way. So, get this, he made the SALESMAN who sold me the thing come over and help lift it over the counter! And I learned that if a fridge is tipped on its side, it takes several hours for the oil to settle back into place. (The things we learn!) All this interspersed with hospital trips.
    Then there was the guys who delivered my new washer and drier. Half way down my basement stairs, the washer slung between them on a rope, they turn to me and say, “Lady, this is the last washer we can deliver here because the space is just too tight.” I just asked if they expected the appliances to break soon. But you know what I was thinking!
    Something about delivery guys seems to bring out a little agression, huh?

  67. Just in time for the summer! A hot stove! I don’t know what the weather is in your area but it is sweltering in Boston.
    Looks great. Cute backsplash.

  68. The story and the stove are both great. Congratulations on the victory and being patient with the delivery guys when you told them how to do it from the beginning. I am not sure I could have been so…
    And now all you need is a new matching hood! πŸ™‚

  69. Reminds me of seepage we had in my office 1 1/2 at new years (rained and rained). We rented space from an Architect who had converted the building about 3 years before, and we sublet 1/2 of our space to an Architectural Engineering. Granted, I don’t have a degree in either, but I do have a Planning Degree from a School of Architecture and Environmental Design, went to school with and have dealt with “these types” for 20 years! Anyway, massive seepage, I said “isn’t from the planters in front of my office”…oh no, its coming down from the roof into interior pipes…then it was “the soils are super saturated…the building is old, floor was not redone when they did the building, no moisture barrier”.. they went so far as to drill holes in the side of the buildng to let the water come “shooting”…a few drops trickled. Came in a few days later, and guess what, they were digging up the planter bed outside my office and putting a moisture barrier in…didn’t leak after that !

  70. First – How in earth did you do all that math in this heat???
    Second – Speaking of your appliances….How’s Mr. Washy?
    Third – Since we now know your stove (does s/he have a name?) and Mr. Washy can we meet the rest of your appliances??
    Yeah I know…I think it’s the heat!

  71. It’s really good to know that despite cultural differences and such, men are men no matter where they hail from.

  72. That is one bee-yootiful stove … just in time to grill outside because it’s so darn hot. Congratulations on a fine new kitchen toy.

  73. Another good reason to teach your children to knit. If these guys had to deal with guage they would have understood the whole “10 is more than 9” thing. And remember, knitting does have a squish factor, so that whole non-squishy square box in a solidly-sided openining thing was a piece of cake compared to, say, a squishy, filthy, lying guage swatch. Really, these guys should have listened to you. Though that would have wiped out the entertaining blog-fodder portion of the whole event, so thanks guys! Come back soon!
    Meanwhile, the new stove winks seductively with it’s fancy little blinking displays. I fear that Mr. Washie may get jealous and run away with the Maytag repairman. Though I’ve heard tell that he wouldn’t fit through the door. Mr. Washie, that is. I don’t know about the Maytag repairman. Have fun cooking on your new stove in 109 degree (for the metrically challeged, anyway) weather!

  74. yes, I know. I should have been paying attention to the new and gorgeous stove/oven…but the part I loved the best was the picture of the two guys trying to get it in the kitchen door…not because of the wide load (not talking about the stove here!), but because of all the yarn piled up in baskets next to the door and on the shelf next to the door, and…
    Too Fun!

  75. Having had a 30″ wide cabinet installed in a bathroom with a 23″ wide door opening, I laughed myself breathless with the memories, reading this one!

  76. Yeesh.
    The stove is very attractive. I also love the backsplash tiling in your kitchen.
    Now I have to go sit quietly somewhere and pray that the universe is balanced in such a way that I make more money than those guys.

  77. What beautiful stove. I’m sorry you had to deal with people who forgot how numbers increase. It must have been the heat….
    A great stove, really. I hope you enjoy watching it clean itself! πŸ™‚

  78. Do these guys happen to work at the bank that formerly serviced the Blue Moon accounts? Disbelief that 10 really IS more than 9 isn’t that far a cry from the fact that people really do knit socks and that they pay money to get what they need to do so.
    Congratulations on the snazzy new stove. I now have stove envy. Use it well.

  79. fire it up; i’m commin’ over for Tea. great photos….LOL…did they mind that?

  80. Yes, yes, this is just like the time my husband tried to store our daughter’s sofa in our basement. He pushed, shoved, and swore and I grabbed a tape measure. I informed him that the sofa was 5″ wider than the door opening and he declared that he would just take the legs off. Problem was, I didn’t include the legs when I measured! Needless to say, it wound up in the garage for 6 months.
    I’m happy that your stove fit so you don’t have to cook in your garage!

  81. I went through the same thing, with a queen-size bed and a very narrow set of stairs. The outcome was me spackling and re-painting a giant hole in the wall (disassembly of the box spring was not possible, although I considered a sledgehammer…)
    I really, really love your backsplash. And I also have more than a little bit of stove envy.

  82. Isn’t it funny how men discover the obvious when you quit reminding them of the solution and it can be their idea? Beautiful new stove.

  83. 10 is more than 9 in a box, 10 is more than 9 with a fox. 10 is more than 9 in the rain, 10 is more than 9 on a train…

  84. This is why I simply go far, far away when delievery people or craftspeople are trying to do something.
    And then I knit. Preferably with earplugs in.

  85. I love it when math works….kind of makes you glad you paid attention in all those classes day after day in grade school…hey wait – weren’t guys in those classes with us?? I know Euclid lived a long time ago, but geometry still works today and so does most of the rest of what we learned. Enjoy the new stove – whip up something good and tell us all about it!

  86. How funny to watch! At least they did finally come to the conclusion that it needed to be taken apart rather than just saying “whelp, looks like it won’t go.”

  87. This part “10 is more than 9. It is more than 9 all the time. It is more than 9 at the top of the door, and it is more than 9 at the bottom of the door. 10 is more than 9 even if you swing the back around.” reminded me of Green Eggs & Ham, “I do not like them in on a train. I do not like them in the rain. I do not like them here or there. I do not like them anywhere!” I’m glad they got it in without damage. Looks fancy. I really like the tiles on the wall! Happy cooking.

  88. The stove looks absolutely gorgeous in your kitchen. I love the mosaic backsplash.
    I hoped they learned an important lesson about physics.

  89. I dare you to tell me you’re not freakin’ in love with that stove now that it’s there. It had you at the first smarmy blink.

  90. Hilarious! I remember a similar conversation with the fellas who moved in my new fridge. The stove looks great in there. πŸ™‚

  91. ha, that’s hysterical. you know, that diagonal thing often works with furniture that has legs, like desks and couches, so i understand where they may have been confused. your new stove looks great!

  92. Steph, that was awesome!! Even funnier to me because sometimes those movers are my DAD!! (aka- Me or my Mom: “Let’s do X.” My Dad: “Hey I’ve just had a great idea. Let’s do X.” Me or my Mom: “Good thinking. grrrrrr!”
    But the stove looks great!

  93. Any colorful language from the guys when you were taking pictures of them attempting to alter physics???

  94. Niiiice….. Purty stove, Stephanie. Just give it a little pat and tell it how nice we all think it is.
    Gee, 10 *is* still bigger than 9, even in metric!

  95. unfortunately, i feel like this is the story of my life! at least at work – this is what happens when you work with engineers and developers and you are a creative. awesome diagrams and stove!

  96. What a waste of premium knitting time! You should have made them hold the sock! πŸ™‚

  97. It’s a bit overwarm here in central PA also. It must be affecting my little gray cells, because I see a face on the front of your shiny new stove, and the door is a big open mouth, moaning “Oooohhh, you wouldn’t BELIEVE what I went through to get here”.
    May you never have to see it replaced.

  98. Ahh… these old houses eh?
    Had to take the window out of the frame and pull the boxspring up to the second story with five strong men and a rope (the first time, with two strong men and two strong women, didn’t work). I’m leaving it there for the next people when I move.
    I had the same issue with my washer and dryer. And presumably the stove (which looks just like yours!) although that was installed before I moved in. Magically, the delivery people got it installed without having to take the doors off the hinges, but for about 10 minutes there we thought we would surely have to.
    LOVE your backsplash.

  99. The stove is GAW-jus, darling! And I really, really, REALLY LOVE the tile backsplash.

  100. We had the same problem with a refrigerator a few years ago. Couldn’t get it through the kitchen doorway. Of course, *my* appliance moving delivery guys never even suggested that we could remove the door and the freezer bin. And, you know, we only had to gain half an inch – less than one centimeter. Sheesh.
    Oh, yeah, and 14 and 10 are greater than 9 – even in the US where we like Fahrenheit temps ;o)

  101. Dude. Schematics proving the installers stupidity. I love it.
    Did they sign a waiver for the pics? Although I wonder at their ability to use the internet.
    Oops- sorry installer guys, that was harsh. But- Sheesh. Harlot had schematics…and everything! You should have just LISTENED.

  102. These were, of course, the guys horsing around in the back of math class saying, “like we’re ever gonna need this stuff”. Yep. I have spent two weeks explaining to contractors and architects that we don’t need to spend $5,000 (US, CDN, who cares, it’s a lot)to alter a doorway because the tolerance on it and the cart that drives through it is only 5″. I finally said, look, it’s women that will be driving the cart… they’re careful! Now what else do we need to discuss?

  103. We know that gauge swatches can lie…but we also know if it is too far off, it isn’t going to work. No amount of blocking will change the size of the door opening. Wouldn’t it have been nice if they had actually listened in the first place?
    Have fun with the new stove when it gets to a reasonable temperature for cooking.

  104. I’m so glad you got your stove in without getting any parts of your house stove in.
    (I suggest the Lone Range, should the occasion ever arise.)

  105. It looks amazing! And I suppose it had better!
    I remember not doing so hot when I took physics a couple of years ago. In fact, it dashed my dreams of being an engineer. But I definitely remember that unless things are squishy they will not get smaller in this world. Right you are that 10 is always more than 9 and that at a diagonal some things do work better, but 10 might become 14, both of which (you are correct again) are still larger than 9. And Duh. Sounds like time for a good cocktail and some sock knitting.

  106. Too funny. What is it with men? Some of them are dumber than friggin’ stumps. Had they listened to you in the first place mayhaps they wouldn’t have been sweating in 43 degree heat?! It looks nice though. Good luck. I am sure it will serve you well.

  107. What a pretty stove! Congratulations on the new acquisition, even if it will require stash diving for a bit.
    We had similar exchanges during a dryer delivery down the basement stairs earlier this year…. only, you know, it was January. They were just happy to be inside, I think.

  108. The stove movers are closely related to the knitters who try to coax a gauge swatch that is *slightly* too small into becoming a sweater that fits. The stove must be taken apart. The sweater must be taken apart. The math doesn’t lie. Math can’t even tell a white lie.
    Gorgeous stove. Happy cooking!

  109. And you think you’re mathematically challenged. Obviously you’re better at it than stove movers.
    Like everyone else yesterday, I really love your backsplash, did you do it yourself? We’ve been looking for something and haven’t found anything we like, but that’s beautiful.

  110. I am very much enjoying that you, the woman who claims math gives her hives, easily did several mathematical calculations today–with diagrams. And stuck to your guns.
    Smashing new stove. I’m jealous.

  111. This is why people are late, why they can’t balance a checkbook, and why they spend time tilting and tipping and scrunching and wishing, because MATH has within it some very universal, unbending truths. And people just don’t want to accept it! Thank heavens they didn’t have to go beyond geometry to finally grasp reality…. (I have this sort of issue with knitting sometimes, the Great Math Conundrum. Which is often followed by a rousing carnival sideshow of Will It Fit – not unlike your stove situation.)

  112. Ooooooo, yes indeedy, that is a gorgeous stove!
    those delivery dudes…sheesh…
    I still want a good look at the countertops…your kitchen is very pretty and cozy looking.
    Congratulations!

  113. Awesome looking stove!! My question is, are we going to call this Mr. Rangey or Mr. Stovey, since — well, you know, you have Mr. Washie??

  114. Oh, how I hate it when men dismiss what I say. Especially when I’m right.
    That’s a gorgeous stove, though. There’s no gas service to this house, so I’m stuck with electric for now. Enjoy your new toy, er, tool!

  115. Oh funny! The stove looks lovely right where it should be.
    This actually reminds me of when I was cutting out fabric for a new tent. We cut the roof pieces, all of the pieces for the roof were cut out, too small. Then we started to cut out the walls and compared the proper sized wall pieces to the too small roof pieces and realized the problem. However, one of my fiends insisted that the other pieces would work. Um no… they were all cut out too small, they will all be too small. 9 is less than 10.

  116. It looks gorgeous in the kitchen!
    There could be a school for movers with varying doors, angled stairways, and other mock obstacles. Moving obstacles like pets and small children should also be included. When you pass, you’ll be allowed to go out into the moving workforce.

  117. Too funny! Had to write, finally, to say how much I enjoy your writing. The yarn, knits, and stove are lovely too… but your writing turned a dilletante kniter and sometime crocheter into a passionate fiber hound! And just in time to learn I have a new grandbaby on the way! Thanks, Stephanie

  118. Refrigerator delivery men feel the same way about measurements, they were sure that the new frig would fit in the space, even though the cabinet framing took up a needed inch. Refrigerator’s do not squish in either : )

  119. Too funny! I hope it works, after all that shuffling and dismantling. You never fail to entertain us. Thanks, and good luck with the new Ms. Stovie.

  120. Ha! I just had a fridge delivered ina 1920’s house with wee doors. I was scared, but it fit.
    BTW, black stovetops can be EVIL to keep clean. You may want to buy those little burner insert things now.

  121. I love how you stood by reminding them that it wouldn’t fit. Your own form of entertainment – all you were missing was the popcorn. I personally would have chewed my leg off in a trap to get out of there. I wouldn’t have wanted to see them fuss and fume and tear things apart. I would have set my husband there with the guys. I would have found someplace I just had to be at that time, and gotten the heck out of there.
    Thank you for staying there and taking the photos. Too funny!

  122. I laughed SO HARD!! They are brilliant homosapiens and I bow to their intellect (heavy sarcasm). I am thinking that if they hadn’t come up with the answer all by themselves maybe you could have helped? Jeez

  123. Geometry was the only math I liked in school… I’ll admit to being a bit jealous of your gas stove; we have an electric and I hate that I can’t use it when the power is out…

  124. That is the prettiest stove in the entire world. I want.
    Though I might not ever be able to get a new stove since I can’t figure out how they got our stove in. We can’t even open the stove door all the way.
    This is not a problem you would have in NYC. This is the only place I’ve ever lived that you basically have to show architectural plans of your apartment building before they will even let you buy something. When we bought a couch I had to essentially swear in blood that yes, our door was wider than 41 inches, no there was no turn in the hallway that would not allow a couch that is 6′ long to turn through, no it does not have to pass through any doors INSIDE my apartment that may be smaller than 41 inches, yes the door to my apartment building is wider than 41 inches, and no there is no twisty staircase that will make it impossible to get it into my apartment. Even after all of that they said, “Are you really really sure? Do you want to go home and measure?” “Yes we are sure.” “If it gets to your apartment and we can’t deliver it you will still have to pay the delivery fee and a restocking fee.” “Yes, we know, it will fit.” “OK well, go home and measure and you can call us up until next Tuesday to cancel the order if it turns out it won’t fit.”
    Here 10 is always bigger than 9 (probably because they don’t want that to happen to them 1,000 times each day)

  125. OK… it’s not that I wasn’t paying attention, really I was. But I don’t want to talk about the stove. I wanna talk about your tile backsplash.
    That is so cool. Did you do that yourself? I’ve always wanted to try to do something like that but my inner geek just won’t allow it. Every time I try to do something cool and free form and funky it just comes out dorky, stupid and lame. Sigh.
    So… to sum up…. Like the stove. Love the backsplash. And leave it to men to ignore the basic laws of physics.

  126. That is an absolutely gorgeous stove. I want one. Mine is a tiny little half thing. You could probably have lined three of mine up side by side and still had room to get it through your door.
    This was a saddening fact when Thanksgiving rolled around last year.

  127. Looks nice though, despite the trouble! Love your tiling behind the stove and counter as well – did you do that yourself? Very pretty…

  128. It’s a standard man thing, often. You can’t tell them the answer. You must lead them there and let them think they figured it out on their own. (I would smugly say that no one has to do that for me, but there are many in the world more subtle than I, so they may be leading me down the primrose path without my knowledge too.)

  129. I bet these guys never ask for driving directions either.
    And I bet Sir Washie is chortling heartily over the whole affair.
    The stove looks terrific and I bet it will cook up a storm – as soon as it gets cool enough to think of cooking, that is.
    And the backsplash – is that your artist nature shining through? Please tell us how it was done!

  130. Haha. I mean… you know… they ARE moving household appliances for a living, so I suppose that this whole math thing isn’t their strong suit. But that must have been amusing.

  131. That is hilarious!!!
    The new stove is gorgeous!!!
    BTW You are gonna love the self cleaning part, it’s the best! The easiest cleaning you will ever do….

  132. I haven’t had a delivery guy yet who believed me on anything. I like to think it’s not because I’m a girl, but I end up thinking that anyway.
    Book by Daniel Gilbert, “Stumbling on Happiness” discusses how human beings are the only creatures who can mentally project into the future. And despite the fact that we can, we generally do it very very badly.
    Your guys are a perfect example.

  133. Nice to know that 14 and 10 are more than 9 where you are too!! Enjoy your new stove! Now if only new stoves came with their own personal chefs too!

  134. She’s lovely, and looks right at home next to the glorious tile (and I, too, would love a close-up and the tale of the backsplash.)
    She’s just so perky and big-eyed, I think you should call her Miss Cookie – and if you are really a hog for punishment, today is the day to make jam on that brand-new baby, because standing over a burner on its top temperature and stirring for what seems like hours is just the thing when the temps pass 40!
    No, really, a bit of a lie-down, some well-iced scotch, and cotton sock knitting and you’ll be recovered tout suite!

  135. That is freaking hysterical! Why are men so stubborn they think they can defy the laws of physics?
    BTW…I love your backsplash and cabinets! Jeez, I need a new kitchen.

  136. Too, too funny. Why is it that men won’t listen to the laws of science when we tell them that something won’t work (or will work for that matter) and then have to believe that they thought it up all on their own?! I have a husband and two sons who need to think that everything was their idea…but I have learned to work with that to make things happen as I’d like them to. I’ve actually gotten quite good at making my husband and oldest think that whatever I want was their idea first…

  137. Oooh, it’s really shiny. And really big. I bet it will bake things at any temperature you want.

  138. Reminded me…..
    I had a bad entrance door to my apartment. I got it with the apartment and it looked as if someone had tried to break in without knowing how and then fixed the door and added some homemade safety locks…
    Well, I wanted a new door. So I called locksmiths, said, guys, get me some nice safety door with a new frame. It was relatively easy job because the door and the frame were totally standard 80cm wide and 200 tall but they got a bit too wild when taking out the old frame and made a hole which was some ten centimeters larger in all directions. They had to fill the door frame with concrete because it was too heavy to be supported only with some badly done filling between the real wall and the frame and they spent three days making terrible mess and cursing worse than old sailors. And their supervisor even wanted me to pay for the concrete filling, I had to complaint at the boss of the whole circus… and as a result I have a door which can be opened with the proper key… or using a bulldozer. If anyone could get a bulldozer to the hall.
    What are you going to cook tomorrow?

  139. Thanks for sticking up for the laws of physics. It’s a tough job, but someone has to do it. And it might as be a knitter, we seem to have experience with learning that 10 is always greater than 9…especially when deluding ourselves about gauge πŸ˜‰

  140. OMG! They must work for my QA department!!!! (They were the ones giving me and my boss fits today. I won’t bore you.)
    That being said I now have stove envy. *drooooooooool*
    So … what’s the first meal in the new stove? (I’m suspecting it won’t be today given the heat…)

  141. ok. love the logic play-by-play of the whole production, but my absolute favorite part is the image of these guys straining and hoisting their way to the inevitable conclusion (and this is it — the reallyreally good part) with you having the presence of mind to grab the camera and document their “efforts” for our viewing pleasure. you give and give. LOL. thanks for making my day!

  142. Sweet looking stove, though. And every home improvement I’ve ever gone through included some sort of suffering, so maybe you got off cheap.

  143. Your kitchen is gorgeous! I love the new stove. Happy cooking! (Maybe once the heat subsides a little?)

  144. This is why to save yourself aggravation, you meet the guys at the front door with an assortment of screwdrivers and tell them that they are free to measure the stove and the doorways involved, but they are not getting near your home to gouge out doorframes, walls and floors without doing the dis-assembly first. You don’t have endless hours to waste while guys act like dumb blondes.

  145. not only do I really really envy your stove (because mine is electirc AND has burn marks on it) but also I really envy your kitchen. The cabinets and backsplash are absolutely gorgeous, just what I would want!

  146. Men will absolutely NEVER learn math well enough to know that you can’t fit 10 pounds in a 5 pound bag.
    The stove is gorgeous and looks so great in your kitchen. I’m green πŸ™‚

  147. I just knew yesterday that there would be a funny story for today. The stove is beautious!!!

  148. You did math for stove people today.
    Dude, I love you. Also, you’re lying. You’re actually pretty good at math.

  149. Gorgeous stove! At least the didn’t break it…I had some friends who told the movers they had to take the doors of the brand new refrigerator, because afterall, 10 is bigger than 9. They said they could do it without removing the doors. And they did. However, they never said they could do it without BREAKING the doors!

  150. Your stove is BEAUTIFUL!!!
    I haven’t had a working oven in 2 years. Supposedly someone was coming to fix it this Monday, but since I have heard nothing about said fix-it person, I’m guessing they told my father that this stove which was a beautiful and high tech model in the early ’70s (previous tenants bought it) just needs to be thrown out. And there’s no microwave. And… the freezer in the tiny fridge (NYC) doesn’t really work. So, congratulations to you!!
    I bet if Joe had been there and told them it wouldn’t fit they would have believed him. . . .
    Just sayin’.

  151. The stove is quite beautiful. I think the stove guys should give you some money back since you did so much math work for them!

  152. Wow. That is one sexy stove. Too bad it’s too hot to fire it up. Enjoy the variable oven temps…it makes it SO much easier to bake cookies *grin*.

  153. I have stove envy now.
    And I LOVE the tile work of the backsplash. Can we see a better picture?
    Also, how long did it take you to do the math required to figure the math required for the diagonal?

  154. Haven’t laughed this hard in a long time. But the stove looks beautiful.
    Now you’re going to have to replace the overhead vent. But I’m certain you can get that through the door without having to go through the garden.

  155. Why don’t men ever listen? So much hassle could be prevented if they would just listen. The stove is very nice. The men delivering it…not the brightest bulbs in the bunch.

  156. And after all of that…it’s still too damned hot to cook. Gazpacho, anyone?
    Gorgeous stove, Steph! May it last 3 times longer than Sir Washie.

  157. Every time I have a client whose seller is offering to sell them the very large billiards or pool table in the finished basement I offer the same advice: even if you don’t pay, they’ll leave it for you anyway, because it is too hard to take apart and get up the stairs! My track record is 100%.

  158. Sigh, the problem of the y chromosome. Gets in the way of reason and logic every time! Love your new stove and your kitchen. And the tiles. Very much like Gaudi’s broken tile work in barcelona. Did that provide inspiration for you?

  159. Be sure to take a picture of the INSIDE of the oven. it’ll never look that good again. (I did with my new oven!)

  160. Oh my gosh! I am laughing so hard! This is so hilarious. That’s okay – the two of them might believe that it was their idea, but here are over 500 people who probably read your blog every day (probably waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more than that) who realize that you are right and that it was your idea. πŸ™‚ Good job, Steph.

  161. Oh thanks so much for this post! It’s hilarious! I didn’t think I could get something out of this hot day today, put never understimate the big, clever male population to be good for a laugh!

  162. What a beautiful new stove…and I love your addition of “eh” at the end of the sentence. My mother-in-law is Canadian and “eh” is very common around here. You made me laugh!

  163. I have the same stove. I couldn’t even watch them move it in. I wasn’t as worried about it as I was the fridge, but I still decided to stay in the other room.

  164. Okay – I have a question…… My refrigerator died last weekend – and it hadn’t lasted NEARLY as long as your stove, let me tell you (good old Maytag! Why build something that will last when you can build it to die just moments after the warranty expires?) and the FIRST thing I asked in all of the stores was…… will you take the old one away? I did not shop anywhere that was not enthusiastic about ‘taking the old one away’ – and so my question is this….. how on earth did you get the old stove OUT? Surely even you are not persuasive enough to get those two men to take the old one apart and take it away, are you? If you are, I want lessons!!!!

  165. Ooh! Shiny!
    I once watched a lone delivery guy somehow conjure a 36″ wide refrigerator through a 32″ doorway in our old house. He didn’t take it apart or anything. I was right there and I’m still not sure how he did it. It was so cool that it totally made up for the time we got a new washer and it turned out neither of the guys knew how to set up a front loader. (I had to read the installation manual because they wouldn’t and then tell them how to install the thing, which sorta defeats the purpose of paying someone else to install it.)

  166. Thanks for the slumped over, tears running down my face, kids staring at me because I’m guffawing belly laugh! It’s a constant, isn’t it? Men who can’t “hear” a smart woman, even one with visual aids! And, oh, that stove! Wonderful!

  167. Once, many years ago, we also got a new stove. It turned out that, once the stove was installed, the door stuck out about 2 inches further than the previous stove… enough to prevent the dishwasher, which was perpendicular to the stove, from opening.
    I had to take out a chunk of the back wall enough to scoot the stove back. Later that evening, I complain to my mechanical engineering husband: “Aren’t there supposed to be standards for this sort of thing?” He replies: “That’s the great thing about standards: there are so many of them to choose from!”
    Congrats on the new cooker… may you enjoy many joyful meals from it!

  168. As knitters, I think we sometimes, maybe, might be guilty of hoping that ten is smaller than nine? Gauge swatches alone offer countless opportunities for fuzzy math, and, well, who hasn’t held up a sweater that will not fit, closed one eye, squinted the other, and held in her stomach to see if it will maybe fit a little before acknowledging that we really just do need to rip the thing apart?

  169. Hate to be a troublemaker, but wouldn’t “9.5 is bigger than 9” be a more accurate restatement of the 76cm stove and the 72cm door problem? Or is the extra .5 for seam allowance?

  170. Did they know you were taking pictures of them? You gotta love guys that move furniture. I’m sure you are going to become one of their stories! “Remember that crazy lady with the camera and diagrams?”
    Tracy

  171. I hope they didn’t scrape up your door frame, I was cringing through the first half or so of your post.
    That’s a BEAUTIFUL stove.

  172. I get that from my husband all the time. I’ll make a comment/suggestion and five minutes later, it’s like, hey! why don’t we do this…..
    Great stove, by the way !

  173. If Joe had been there to tell them that 10 is bigger than 9 they would have believed him and had the stove in place in 5 minutes. Serves them right.
    Thanks for the good story! Next up, close-ups and the full story of the gorgeous tile backsplash.

  174. Whoa! Look at that beaut!
    Too funny… I love it when people pull out the math πŸ™‚ I can’t tell you how many times I did that kinda stuff during our remodel.

  175. Heh, you are a smartypants! But now you might feel compelled to cook something on a stove that fancy and no way should you be compelled to cook in that weather!

  176. I. Love. That. Stove. I would get it if I could. And men? Clearly kinda dumb. They always have to feel like they had the idea first, so they fail to listen to women when they tell them how to get something done right the first time. Next time you deal with foolish men, perhaps you should demonstrate with your sharpest metal needles…maybe shiny, weapon-y like objects will grab their attention and then they’ll actually listen to you.

  177. Silly, silly girl! All you had to do was start out by saying, “I realize 10 is bigger than 9, but I’m sure you’ll be able to make it fit anyway.” They would’ve had it apart and through the door in no time flat.
    Congrats on the new stove, and your kitchen is lovely!

  178. So, while the geniuses were figuring out the math they obviously failed in school, did you get any knitting or spinning done?

  179. So I got to “72 is only a little smaller” and snorted something in the direction of my monitor, at which point himself turned around and joined me reading. We relived the “remove roughly the back half of the house to insert the silver fridge into it’s new fridgehole” vicariously and with much inhaling of misplaced wine sips.
    Merci, Madame.

  180. At least they didn’t break anything.
    I have seen snipits of your house here and there and I just have to say I love it. You have such great taste.

  181. Hey! I have that same stove! when we got it, it went in to the kitchen just fine, but the new fridge, well….we had to get someone to come and cut out an entire door frame. live and learn.

  182. omg I can’t stand people who ignore someone’s good advice and then a little bit later say the same dang thing like they came up with it!!

  183. Steph this story is sooo funny and has happened to me sooo many times. We have been in this house 34 years so a lot of stuff has come in and out. They never listen even if it DH they always know better. lol….Love the stove and the tiles on the backsplash.

  184. Gorgeous stove. Earlier this year we assembled an IKEA day bed in an upstairs bedroom. I look forward to trying to get that one out when we move. Glad I kept the instructions. (Should not have glued the top molding on, though. Oh well.

  185. Did they have their butt cracks showing the whole time this was going on??? All delivery men in Michigan that come to my house for anything-even the computer guy-have their butt cracks showing.
    Can you imagine in 10 years when the teen guys become delivery men? The way they wear their pants on their hips it will no longer be butt cracks but whole butts! I think I will be too old by then to stomach that.
    Oh, and we all know men can’t measure-you know the old joke so I won’t repeat here. :)snort!

  186. How kind and wise of you to let them think that taking it apart was their idea. That strategy often works well with small children and bosses too. Little do they know that you’ve had the last laugh.

  187. Same thing happened to me with a sofa. We ended up removed the window from the side of the living room and bringing it in that way. 10 is bigger than 9 in USA too!

  188. Ahh Men…too funny! They just have to figure it out for themselves don’t they!
    Your new stove looks lovely now that it is all in place!

  189. Dude. I think you wound up with the guys who delivered our washer and dryer. They irritated me so much I have passed off delivery-dude duty to my husband. He can do man-speak with them better than me.
    Gorgeous stove, BTW πŸ™‚

  190. Oh my…I will need to share this with my high school math students…or perhaps my 8th graders would/should see it too?! Talk about practical mathematical applications! Say, that really is a lovely stove. ;~)

  191. OMG! Too funny. At least they finally “figured it out”. πŸ™‚
    For a second, I heard Dr. Seuss — “10 is more than 9. It is more than 9 all the time. It is more than 9 at the top of the door, and it is more than 9 at the bottom of the door.” It’s more than 9 on the floor! LOL
    I bought a mail-order bed and assembled it. It’s queen-sized and has two sets of drawers topped by a platform (I’m tall, so it works for me — some folks would need steps). The thing is HEAVY and cannot be moved a centimeter unless you take things apart. If I ever move, I think I’ll just take an axe to it and get a new one.
    Or, I could call these guys. . .
    LOL!

  192. Yeah, and they’re back at the store right now, telling the guys how they had to convince you the stove had to be taken apart.
    Still, don’t you think the teapot looks hot on that sexy new stove?

  193. Hilarious! I wish I could have been watching their faces when you were explaining the “diagonal is greater than one of the sides” concept. πŸ™‚

  194. *snort* Partner and I just laughed loud enough and long enough to scare the new cat. She was sleeping soundly and is now staring, wide-eyed, at us, quite sure that Some Big Bad Thing is about to happen. I suppose she’ll get used to us in time.
    Lovely stove, and do (please!) share more about the back splash.

  195. That was hilarious! What I wouldn’t have given to have been a fly on your wall!
    Gorgeous stove! I bet the food cooked on it/in it is even going to taste better.

  196. It is always amazing how long it takes some people to figure it out….they have to walk around the block mentally a few times.
    You will love that stove. I had to leave an older version of that behind 3 years ago….it was a sad departing. It was wonderful relationship we had – and the only oven I have ever been able to bake a cake successfully. It would make cakes where frosting could be an option – not a necessity. Love gas ovens.

  197. You know, I think I spent a good number of hours of my life retouching the images of the control panel and the knob panel for a 3D animated hi-def model of that stove….The triangle buttons where a bi…er….pain. And trying to retouch stainless steel? *grumble grumble hiss spit curse*

  198. It’s beautiful!!!! Looks similar to mine (only I have a glass top). Say, was that a knitting olympics gold medal I saw in one of the shots? If so, tres cool!!!!

  199. Ha! Well said!
    Strangely enough, I feel compelled to admit that as I laughed I got this strange guilty feeling, thinking of all the times I’ve thought “Missing gauge by 2 stitches is just a little bit, better than missing gauge by 4 stitches. It’ll work.” and “my bust size is almost the bust size of that pattern. It’ll work.” and “My sock cuff bind off is a bit tight, but it’ll work.” Whew, good thing yarn IS malleable!

  200. My Grandparents used to own a store. When they got in a big shipment that was gong to require some creative stacking to fit into the store room new employees were always sent off up the street to borrow the “Shelf Stretcher” from another store.
    Apparently you needed a door stretcher!

  201. Sorry, but I’m glad to hear someone else having the same problem with delivery men. It took us 7 months to build our house and on moving day they they got our sofa stuck in the front door for several hours. Of course, I had told them it needed to go in through the sliding glass door around back.
    Beautiful stove, though and glad it made it in.

  202. A truth as true as 10 is more than 9 is “men feel better when they think it is their idea”
    When my parents got their new couches they had to take the door FRAMES off- not just the doors. Those things were huge.

  203. I don’t know why it is that so many men find it impossible to believe a woman knows what she’s talkin’ about..
    it is awful fun when they have to in the end, though..
    I had kind of the opposite sort of experience today.. the string I was trying to make fit was too small to do the job :(.. blogged it, and I figure if I’m 2 degrees of separation from the person who can help me fix it, you’ll be the degree in the middle.. so I’m sittin’ here whining and hoping the right person sees me. πŸ™‚

  204. I have major stove jealousy. I have the equivalent of your old stove, but in electric. It is so bad, I can’t even tell you.

  205. Looks good! Hope your house didn’t suffer too much scraping and banging as they tried to fit the stove in. πŸ™‚

  206. Too funny! Glad it worked out in the end – it looks great in your kitchen. Beautiful backsplash by the way!!

  207. That is a very nice stove, and I absolutely LOVE the mosaic design on the walls! Gorgeous! Did you do that?

  208. Does is mean we are grown ups because we are so crazy excited by how beautiful the stove is??? Congratulations on the beautiful addition to your home. Happy days, k

  209. I commend your restraint in discussing the human ego rather than the male ego.
    But that would have been too easy.

  210. Love your new stove – just beware of one thing, EVERY time we use the self cleaning feature of our gas stove, it sets off the smoke detectors …. not fun at all! Enjoy the beautiful stove though, and hope you’ll share more “Bigger than” Smaller than” stories, too funny!

  211. Oh, it’s really beautiful! You deserve this wonderful new stove, Stephanie! I also enjoyed your little story, but WOW, I am happy for you and your lovely new stove!

  212. well, at least *you* weren’t the one that had to strain and sweat and move it. serves them right for not trusting you.
    although that seems like a very lovely stove and one that cooks at a variety of temperatures.

  213. This wa so funny, especially as I have a similar story involving an old jpinball machine and getting it up out of our basement. The new purchasers wouldn’t listen to me when I told them how we got it down, and that it might just come up the same way(???) They went up and down those stairs several times, banging my walls and leaving plaster bits on the floor. Finally they decided to take the upper part off–with all the bells and whistles–and cut, yes CUT the wires. I couldn’t believe it. There were a zillion wires of every colour inside. They cut every one. They carried the pieces up and out of our lives forever. Was I glad I had insisted on getting paid the cash before they attempted to take the machine out. I bet they are still trying to rewire that old beauty!

  214. A woman after my own heart. How many times must we explain these simple things to people who should naturally be simple themselves?
    Many. That’s the answer I have come up with… “many” times. *sigh*
    At least the newest addition is purty. :o)

  215. What a great story! The sad part is to realize that it is actually true. But then, I am not sure you could have made something like this up – seems way too absurd! thanks for the great laugh, and congrats on the nice new stove!

  216. Don’t be too quick to judge the moving guys…
    Admit it: we have ALL used a similar approach once or twice when looking at a gauge swatch.

  217. Wow, apart form the obvious ten is bigger than nine thing, you achieved stove installation. I call that a result. And you have no idea how many times I had to resist the urge to mention the thing about men and their mis-judgement of sizes whilst installing a washing machine with my father. The washing machine that the men dumped in my kitchen and failed to install because there were, shock horror, electric cables and also water pipes, and all that’s dangerous, don’t cha know, with an appliance that requires electricity and water. They also failed to believe that 595mm is smaller than 600mm and that it would go, especially as the old one which had just come out of the space (admittedly like a cork out a bottle) was 595mm. Aaaargh, men! I was four months without my washie.

  218. Looks pretty swank! Guess you’ll have to come up with some equally impressive recipes, no?

  219. Those are some of the best lines I have read in a very long time. Thanks for the belly laugh of the day!

  220. You never, EVER fail to make my morning…or afternoon…in today’s case, my night. I hadn’t checked your blog for days…ever since I couldn’t find it one day last week. I was happy to find it alive and so well and just wanted to say that I missed you, too! Thanks for making me laugh tonight, and for making my friend Tobey in Seattle laugh, as she surely will when she gets my email with the link to your latest post. She’s the mother of two small boys running her own business and doesn’t have time for blogs unless I send it to her. I’m sure you understand.

  221. Beautiful stove. May you make many happy meals together (and I don’t mean the McDonald’s kind).
    So generous of you not to “I told you so” and not to go the stereotyping route with the movers. I’m not sure I could have been so generous… and I most assuredly would have thoroughly examined the stove and the door jam for damage. Mostly because I know some guys that would not have done the “take it apart” thing until dents and scratches to the stove and scrapes and whole chunks of molding were removed from the doorway … and then they would have wanted to take apart the doorway, not the stove!

  222. May I direct you to the sofa scene in Douglas Adam’s “The Long Dark Tea Time of the Soul”? Boys and depth perception don’t mix. It’s why they can’t find the butter when it’s on the eye-level shelf and at the front in the fridge…

  223. Ps. How can it possibly be hotter in Toronto than in Richmond? I’ve been thinking lately of moving north again to escape the summer heat but I can tell you now…it WON’T be to Toronto!
    Pps. The stove looks fabulous.

  224. I have been waiting to read this story all day! But damn! It looks great. BTW, I love the tile job on your backsplash.

  225. Had my 21 year old read this so she would know that men are always like this. So true no matter what

  226. It’s a beautiful stove! How soon are you going to start dyeing things on it and in it?

  227. Sadly, it’s not just men, not just delivery guys, not just hourly wage earners that this issue happens with. After much serious thought, I think it’s human nature. It is frustrating to not be heard, but at least you have the blog to tell it all to. I was prepared to see an unappealing appliance but it’s…..gorgeous! Love the tiles, too.

  228. Oh man…I’m weak from laughing. And very proud, in retrospect, of my late hubby. We hated apt.-supplied fridges and their stupid, tiny, don’t-really-freeze freezers and got a nice, big 2nd-hand fridge with one that… you know… froze things. But it needed the doors taken off to get into 2 different places, plus down/back up his mother’s basement stairway for interim storage once. Mike measured and figured that out the *first* *time* we moved it. All on his own! πŸ˜‰
    Don’t you think the new stove looks very smug sitting there? And she actually *fits* into the same space the old one did!
    My only question is, by what miracle did you get delivery guys – in 43C temps, yet – who managed not to reveal butt-crack cleavage??? Ok, so they’re a little wobbly on the math. They’re geniuses at dressing themselves! ::snerk::

  229. I love this story – although frustrating for you – entirely entertaining for me – especially the way you write – I can totally imagine being there – amazing, and, unfortunately, way too common, I’m sure! But the stove looks just lovely and none the worse for the harrowing experience it endured….

  230. good luck with the new stove. i want to replace ours (not all the burners light consistently anymore) but i am used to cooking things til they’re done and being worried every time i turn it on. my inlaws got a new one two years ago and i can’t figure it out. though she does have one feature i want.. sealed burners!
    wear it in good health. πŸ˜‰

  231. Once again – you were on top of things – you make us all look good (smart). Beautiful stove – nice work!

  232. That is the funniest thing I’ve seen today. And I have the same stove! (ok, ours has dings from small children kicking it in boredom, as it’s the floor model, but otherwise the same). It’s fantastic, enjoy!

  233. I’m still laughing! And your Dr. Seuss approach is wonderful! To whit:
    “[I know] 10 is more than 9.
    [It’s] more than 9 all the time.
    It is more than 9 at the top of the door;
    it is more than 9 at the bottom of the door.
    [I know] 10 is more than 9;
    [swinging it ’round just won’t make it fine.
    It’s more than 9 all the time.]”

  234. Men! It has to be their idea, you know. πŸ˜‰ The secret is to lead them to thinking it was all their idea to begin with.
    Wonderful stove. Happy timing…er, cooking!

  235. Those “gentlemen” sound like to one who delivered my new refrigerator. Wonder if they are related? The insisted on bring the new one in the front door, through the SMALL vestibule, then a choice of 2 narrow doors(one leads to a narrow hallway with an immediate left turn into the kitchen) to get to the kitchen. The intelligent choice would have been to go down the driveway, which they could have backed their truck up, and the across the patio (about 3.5m) up 3 not 4 stairs and into the kitchen. Instead they spent 1 hour trying to figure out how to remove the doors on the fridge. (couldn’t read the directions). And then finally got it in and installed. I said nothing out loud but I was saying a lot in my head and under my breath. Both my Mom and my dd agree–only a man!

  236. In those situations where the male of the species is/has to be/believes he’s got the answer, it’s good to smile, wear beige and get to where the solution is “his/their” idea (even though you came up with it hours/days/weeks before).
    The stove looks beautiful. What brand is it?
    We in Minnesota cooled off wonderfully today. Hope it’s coming your way too.

  237. My boyfriend used to work for a Circuit City, where part of his job used to be fitting the oversized tv’s people had recently purchased into their cars.
    Atleast once a day, he would have to have a discussion similar to the one above with someone who was completely convinced that their brand new 928-inch monster of a television would fit into their trunk. And, just like with the movers, the new tv owner would almost always suggest turning it on a diagonal.
    To this day, I’ve never understood what makes reasonably intellegent people spontaneously disregard the laws of physics when it comes to fitting a bigger thing inside (or in your case through) a smaller thing.

  238. You have me in tears again! I kept waiting to see if they had some Special Knowledge that would get the stove through…love that you got photos of the process.

  239. Lovely stove. Here’s the REAL problem: they’re men. Can’t think straight on a good day – must do everything the hard, indirect way. Too hot in NC to contemplate this further. Enjoy the new stove and talk to it kindly, as though it’s quite intelligent — maybe it will last eons.

  240. It’s a shame that knitters don’t rule the world. We can at least understand basic reality. 10 is more than 9 and off to the frog pond you go!
    I like your teapot. I had one like that. I left the whistle top off and it melted to the stove.

  241. What could you possibly know about numbers and things being bigger and smaller? You’re a woman. The fact that you’ve done gauge swatches galore and can tell them to the 1/4 stitch the number of stitches per 10 cm in any given garment in the house doesn’t meant you know anything about measurements… Guys measure things…they know about measurements… πŸ˜‰
    I’ll bet they think they can get another 50 yards out of a skein of yarn too.
    men.
    Nice stove though.

  242. Wouldn’t you know it, you got a couple of hosers to show up and find out you actually had a vague idea of the truth behind the words that came out of your mouth. Beauty, eh?
    Love your stove. I want to cook stuff on it. I miss fire. The Mr. thinks gas stoves are too dangerous and won’t let me have one.

  243. Ohhhhhh! Nice stove! I understand about “making it fit.” We have a one butt kitchen down here. Seriously, we had one kitchen drawer when we moved in. Anyway, we bought Moby, the Great White Frig which takes up about one-sixth of my available space and tried to convince the delivery man (just one of him, bless his heart) that you HAD to take off the frig door or it wouldn’t fit. Two hours, one frig door removal, two cabinet door removals, one set of accessability railings later and lots of Vaseline we had a frig in the kitchen instead of the living room. I’ll burn the house down if it ever dies because I am not doing this again.

  244. A hilarious story, and an abosolutely gorgeous stove ! Amazing that the men simply dismissed and discarded your ideas until forced to confront the laws of mathematics.
    Reality…….what a concept !

  245. I will refrain from commenting on men and math and the ability to listen to direction from females and instead compliment you on a lovely new stove. Very shiny. Bet it also bakes well (something I’m that I’m guessing won’t get tested for a while if it’s very hot there presently).

  246. Oooooh, that’s one gorgeous stove. What will it’s first creation be? Something completely yummy, i am sure.

  247. I always read you to my husband, because when I am sitting there exploding with laughter he always comes over and says, “What?”
    So I showed him your new stove and read today’s and yesterday’s entries.
    He said to tell you he really likes your tile, and that you should stick with centigrade, because 43 is way less than 109.

  248. Awesome stove. I’m sure the delivery guy is pleased to have his backside so nicely displayed, ROFL!!

  249. … wow. I am simply stunned by their… brilliance. Maybe I just have a low tolerance for stubborn idiots, maybe the heat just makes me irritable (it’s hot here in California, too), but… wow. That’s a new level of special to me.
    At least you have a working stove again, eh? πŸ™‚

  250. sounds like your house is a lot like mine…heehee. I love the socks in spite of hte fact that they don’t quite match. We’re off to drive Route 66…looking for yarn and fiber all the way!

  251. You:
    10 is more than 9. It is more than 9 all the time. It is more than 9 at the top of the door, and it is more than 9 at the bottom of the door. 10 is more than 9 even if you swing the back around. We should take it apart.
    Me: Channeling Dr. Seuss?

  252. Oh I just love people who move heavy things!
    I love the way that even though you may pay a removals company upwards of $100/hour for a couple of burly guys who are apparently experts at moving heavy things, they still manage to be alarmed at the shape of a fridge or a couch, or the weight of a box (“gee this box is pretty heavy”, urm yeah, that’s why I’m paying you, mover of heavy things to move it!)
    Anyway, thanks for the laugh. FWIW new stoves scare the crap out of me – hope the new stove smell is gone soon!

  253. Methinks they did not know that you are the Yarn Harlot. You very regularly use measuring & math & stuff.
    I have friends who can’t measure to save themselves, sad to say.
    The stove men have probably met people like them & learned that (like gauge swatches) some measurement takers can’t be trusted.
    Not you though.
    Love the stove, & mosaic tiles!
    Beautiful kitchen. Cook up a storm!

  254. If you haven’t read Dirk Gently’s Holistic Detective Agency by Douglas Adams, I suggest you do so, if only for the chesterfield wedged permanently in the staircase.

  255. Never argue math with a knitter. Especially when it comes spacial arrangement. Nice back side shot of the mover… (And lovely stove and back splash.)

  256. Oh boy… flashbacks to 5 years of woodwork class… and fixing my mum’s stove recently.
    ‘Why are women so bad at parallel parking?’ (hold thumb and pointer finger 4 inches apart)
    ‘Because men keep telling them this is nine inches.’
    P.S. Your new stove looks smoken hot.

  257. I once had to cancel a couch delivery because it was half an inch larger than my doorway (yes, I had measured the doorway before I went shopping, but I hadn’t measured it while the door was open, intruding into the space). I then went on a multi-state voyage looking for a replacement. Maybe I should’ve called these guys and asked them to rejigger the laws of physics for me instead.

  258. You always make me smile… today it was an out-loud laugh. Thanks.
    Now may you get cool enough weather to use your new gizmo. Such fun you can have, if ever you get that thing called “free time.”

  259. It gorgeous. (I too have gas-stove envy.)
    Its 43 degrees out. Did you turn it on and test it? (I suggest fudge brownies as a quick test.) Or are you waiting for September?

  260. is that like… the pattern calls for 9 skeins, but i only have eight, so it could totally work if i just knit a little looser?
    stove math is funny.

  261. In the North End of Boston there is an apartment building with a patched hole in the ceiling of the hallway on the ground floor. This hole is a result of boys thinking that 92″ can be made to be smaller than 90″ by pivoting a sofa. Oh physics – the peskiest of the sciences…

  262. Oh Stephanie, I love your stove !!!!! I love stainless steel and black. I would love a whole kitcen of stainless steel appliances.
    I have to bore you with my birthday present that my brother gave me. He wanted to get me a gift certificate from a yarn shop here in Oswego NY (Northwind Yarns & Weaving Co. and they are online.) but my step-dad (whom I call “dad”) said, “now Ron, she has a room full of yarn that you gave her from Bea Kay”. Well, thank God he didn’t listen to him and listened to my step-mom. She said “she doesn’t have to buy yarn she could buy needles, books, or things to that effect”. So to make a long story short. He DID get me that gift certificate and that was on Saturday at my SURPRISE b-day party. The BIG 50 one. Well, on Monday my little granddaughter, Madison, and I went to spend it. What a nice day that was. I bought some ashford tekapo Pure New Zealand Wool yarn. Forest is the color name. Beautiful. I am making a Brea Bag that I found on the Berroco Free Pattern site. It is working up fine. Started it Monday night and it has been WAY to HOT to work on it. But today is a much cooler day. Happy Knitting to you and all.
    Sorry for the length.

  263. You wouldn’t believe how many times I’ve had that sort of conversation with movers and other “handy”men in general!!!! I’ve learned to just let them get on with it, then I can have the pleasure of saying “I told you so” in the end πŸ˜‰

  264. You let THESE people hook up the gas? Seriously, I love the look of the stove. It’s so nice when the new one looks so different from the old one that you really know it’s new. And, yes, I agree–the backsplash is great!

  265. If all men were knitters, they would learn that measurements and instructions are not evil!
    On a different note…there is a small group of us in our town who meet on Wednesdays at a coffee shop to knit. Three of us met last night: me, the utilitarian knitter (sweaters and usable items), the lacemaker, and the novice knitter who delights in the miracle that occurs at her fingertips with each stitch. Because she is so new to knitting, she is not encumbered by what should be done – she does what she sees needed, and beautifully! My friend needed a tool to keep the double strands she was knitting from tangling. The solution? A small plastic bottle and a potato masher. Confused? Poke a hole in the bottom of the bottle, and insert the handle of the masher through it. The broad base of the masher is the stand, the bottle acts as a spool; she winds yarn from each skein together onto the “spool” and smoothly knits away. She is so creative!

  266. LOL!! Oh. My. Gosh. Okay, as we all know the male brain has some strange function that allows men to think that if they “say” it is so, it is so! The stove looks nice! Thanks for the update on the installation!!

  267. LOL – I love the stove story & btw I have the same stove (but not that awesome tiled backsplash)!

  268. AHAHAHAHAHA!
    Best story I’ve heard all week!
    Beautiful new stove and beautiful kitchen! I love the mosaic work, did you do it yourself?

  269. It’s gotta be a guy thing…..a universal guy thing, ROTFLMAO!
    The stove, a beauty! Congrats!

  270. i am in love with your moasic backsplash. and great stove!
    (P.S. as i am about to move into a new home that needs all new everything, you have my wheels turning as to how to reproduce your backsplash. thanks a lot for the extra work now!)

  271. I hate laughing at your misery, but this was just too funny. This is alot like dealing with my boss, too — you have to make him think that whatever needs to be done was HIS idea. Then, and only then, will he do it.

  272. Ha! Some people…
    I got a new stove just over a year ago. Turns out to have a feature I’d never heard of. A Sabbath setting. Yeah, turn on the Sabbath setting and the stove Will. NOT. work for the duration of Sabbath. That makes me giggle.

  273. I was amused by the story already, but the diagrams darn near made me pee my pants. Well played, Yarn Harlot. Well played.
    Also: Pretty stove!

  274. BEAUTIFUL stove and funny story, Stephanie! Can we have some backsplash porn next??

  275. It never ceases to amaze me how men think that they can alter the laws of physics. And I thought you showed great restraint when **they** came up with the idea of taking parts off! BTW, it’s a beautiful stove!

  276. That is so funny, and such a man thing to do… Heaven forbid a women be right about something like that! OY! My stove is very close to that, but my buttons are on the backsplash (I have small kids, so we bought one like that on purpose!!!)

  277. Just confirms that men are the same whether English or Canadian – they don’t listen to women!

  278. Oh, the memories of getting my 86 inch sofa up my 76 inch stairs in a townhouse that was never built to move furniture. Thanks for the laugh of the day. (patio doors are a must in this situation)
    PS – The stove looks great!

  279. I’ve got the same stove, looks good! Did you know it has a setting for baking on the Sabbath? I haven’t even tried to figure out how the self cleaner works!

  280. There is something comforting in knowing that 10 is always bigger than 9.
    Perhaps it is love of adventure and the thrill of the ordinary that forces us to confirm that fact whenever we move furniture, lest the universe has altered somehow since last we moved couch or tv or fridge.
    Btw – new stove looks great

  281. don’t you dare try to cook/bake anything till this heat lets up baby.
    I like cake, you like cake too.

  282. Ooooo nice stove! And it even fits right into the space between the cabinets too.
    Do you know how many people wouldn’t even think to measure the doorways and only the space where it goes? Now if only I could get a new (2007) refrigerator to fit in under cabinets built in 1962.

  283. LOL!!!
    In the new Ontario curriculum, the classic question in math now is ‘Explain your reasoning.’ Obviously they have never worked with people who install stoves……

  284. Nice of the delivery men to wear clothing that is photographable. If it were me they would have been showing parts of their body that only their significant others should see. Hope they were good sports about having their pics taken!

  285. Thanks for the memories! This happened to me in the ’80s…on a regular basis, my having decided to renovate an old (i.e., narrow) house. First, the refrigerator, then the stove, then the loveseat — all, successfully (and eventually) placed INSIDE the house after much pleading and agonizing. But — wait for it — the leather chair, en route to the second floor, got stuck on the staircase, with the guy from the store declaring, “Lady, if I can’t get it up, NOBODY can!!!” I told him to !#!&^%!!!&! leave it where it was. In the end, my boyfriend “got it up” — albeit by hoisting it over the balcony at the front of the house! Here’s to older houses and their character!

  286. Hilarious. I just shared that with some non-knitting friends, because anyone can appreciate the hilarity of diagrams and graph paper. Your new stove is beautiful!

  287. tears in my eyes from laughter! I’m totally jealous of your gorgeous new stove!
    I’ll be dealing with this same issue in the very near future as we embark on a kitchen renovation — note to self: measure door frames before shopping for appliances to ensure clearance.

  288. One pretty stove! I get to witness that kind of logic every 2-3 years being a Navy wife. It’s either “How the $%#@ did you get this in the house in the first place?” or “Lady, it’s never going to fit.” Movers are an interesting bunch. Oh my stuff has made it into every house (9 in 17 years) and all the rooms I wanted something specific placed there. However, I don’t argue or tell them I know better. I hand out lots of pizza and drinks and let them figure it out. Pizza and cold drinks, that’s the trick!

  289. Priceless!!! Men will never learn, will they? Thanks for the chuckle. By the way, love the mosaic backsplash!!!

  290. Thing the first: Looks GREAT!!!
    Thing the Second: you know it was because you a woman and their “men” that they couldn’t agree with you right?! It’s the same way with my hubby I say something that we should do, hours/days later he thinks he’s come up with a brilliant plan, my plan. MEN!
    Thing the third: It still looks GREAT and I love your back splash.

  291. Your new stove is gorgeous. We are going through the same measurement issues with a new air conditioner and air purifier. Two out of three people with tape measures do not know what to do with the information they get off them.

  292. I had this sofa-bed that I moved about three times in about three years and always got the same movers to do it. The damned thing was heavy and always fell open and got stuck just as it was being carried through a doorway, in spite of being tied closed. The last time I hired them they had to carry up three flights of stairs to my studio, and they said, “Lady, if you ever need to move this f@#%ing thing again, hire someone else.”

  293. I think the moving men’s … mmmm….reluctance to hear what you suggested is just pure sexism. If Joe was there and said the same thing, the men in the 100 degree heat would have said …. Mmm okay, lets remove the door, etc. and they would have been done with it sooner.
    Anyway beautiful stove. Congratulations!!! But do wait to start cooking on it until it cools off a bit.

  294. Love your new stove. Mine is gas, too, but not as many bells and whistles. I admire your dealings with the delivery men, laughed until I cried. Your tongue must be hamburger now from all the biting, while allowing the macho crew to come up with the solution “on their own”!
    I read your blog religeously, but this is the first time I was absolutely compelled to leave a comment.
    Knit on, Canada. From a proud Canadian.

  295. >
    “I do declare! Whatever would we do without those big, strong men to figure out all that hard arithmetic for us? Bless their hearts, they had to try for so long to figure it out, I just can’t imagine how long it would have taken little ole me!”
    I am not making this up: Five years ago we bought a new dryer. We have a double door in the back that could have accommodated the dryer AND a Canadian hockey team. And also? The washroom is in the back, right next to that door. Bur no, they said, it would be EASIER to bring it through the front of the house. Nevermind that I pointed out no fewer than four narrow, door-type obstacles between the accessible front door and the dryer’s assigned space. They did struggle so, bless their hearts, before they returned it to the hand-truck and went around the back.
    And whoever up there said about “bless their hearts?” Yup. That’s what it’s meant for. Greasing the condescension for people who should know better.
    It’s also sometimes used for children with boo-boos, and to express genuine compassion for the unfortunate: “That poor little dog is blind, bless his heart.”
    Anyway — great stove, great Advanced Stove Geometry, awesome tile!

  296. I hope I am not repeating what 100 knitters before me have said, but — a lot of men (my apologies to those who are innocent of this) can’t “hear” women when they are in the “man zone” and assume that what he is thinking is the way to do it is accurtate — lifting something heavy? momentary deafness occurs. Sanding the floor and fire breaks out in the garbage bags? momentary deafness occurs. Save your voice (and your nerves), from now on, when movers, contractors or any one else in the “man zone” comes to your house … pour yourself a drink, settle in with some knitting and watch them try to puzzle through it!
    And I think their being stubborn about the “9 and 10” makes it ok to post an “ass shot” of one of them on the net — at least his shirt is tucked in! lol!

  297. My husband delivers appliances for a living (the largest being a 60″, 900 lbs. stove) so I hear all the stories about customers who think 10 can be less than 9 if they want it to be. Never works. Maybe Canadian appliances have a squish factor built in that ours don’t.

  298. I sympathize with your aggravation about the delivery guys not listening to you. But good for you for taking pictures!

  299. LOL!!
    Um- did they perchance try measuring the stove using inches rather than centimeters? It would have come out to a smaller number than the door frame width…
    (snort. giggle. giggle)
    Stove looks absolutely wonderful! Now you just need to remember to go by temperature and not only by time. Unless you like things crispy.
    Cheers!

  300. Oh my, I’ve got the tears! Sending this off to my man who works with other men and I’m sure will have a good laugh!

  301. I’m coveting your new stove right now…we have an all-electric apartment, so I’m never “cooking with gas” (my grandad used to say that whenever things were going well…”NOW you’re cooking with gas!”).
    I hate to play the gender card, but most guys completely tune out higher frequency (read: female) voices when they are dealing with problems involivng mathematics. I’ve had similar experiences with mechanics. So frustrating!

  302. Oh, been there done that!
    In our case, it was the guys moving a washing machine into the basement.
    Down a sharply turned corner in the middle of the stairway.
    They did not measure first, just assumed because they hauled a washer out, they could take a washer in.
    And they got stuck in the corner.
    It was a long afternoon. Note – I do not recommend taking apart a washer on a stairway, scratches, digs, swearing and lost parts are guaranteed.

  303. This is just too funny. Those men really should learn how to knit so that they can understand the principle of gauge.

  304. As a person who is under the delusion she can make just about anything….tell us, please, about the backsplash. Did you do that? Great looking stove by the way, I like how the whimsical backsplash is kind of making fun of the seriousness of the stainless steel stove and they look great together.

  305. now i have total stove envy! that’s one gorgeous piece of technology!

  306. I love that colorful mosaic of a backsplash. Fantastic! (This is the kind of job you’d tip the mover dudes for, but in this cade it really sounds like they should have been tipping you!)

  307. Movers often have some magical voodoo that is of another world. Maybe they are not bound by physical rules…these guys must not have received the right certificate or they would have magically brought that lovely stove into the kitchen. BTW, I love your backsplash! Did you do it yourself?

  308. At least you didn’t have to carry the thing. Serves them right having to move in all that heat because they wouldn’t listen to you. Of course, now that it is in the kitchen, it looks awesome. May it bring you much happiness.

  309. I think movers must be trained in another universe, maybe like those Dali paintings, and then sent here to move things. They really should teach those people some basic geometry.

  310. frickin’ hilarious. that’s all i have to say.
    I love the tile one the wall behind the stove πŸ˜›

  311. Y’know…if the delivery folks had been women, the stove would have been taken apart and reassembled in your kitchen in the first place (!), leaving time for a glass of iced tea and a chat about knitting πŸ™‚
    ..I also love the tile wall behind the stove!
    Thanks for the laugh!!!

  312. Does delivery guy know his bum is floating about in cyberspace? Who says ther is NO justice, lololololol!!!

  313. They might not have been sweating quite so much if they had listened to you in the first place! πŸ™‚ Your stove looks great!

  314. THAT was hilarious. Must remember though – people who move appliances for a living are hired for their muscle, not their advanced degrees in geometry. That is OK, as they are nonetheless making themselves very useful to we who cannot lift a stove… (she says, contemplating the lifting required to eventually replace the washer-dryer upstairs in the loft closet…).
    Cool new stove! You enjoy it – and btw, I too LOVE that backsplash you’ve got.

  315. You get me all hot when you flash your geometry skills, you big tease.
    The one thing that surprises me is that most men I know tend to overestimate, not underestimate, size. You know, it looks like six but it’s really eleven?
    I won’t draw you a picture.

  316. I knew there had to be some other things in common! My stove is almost identical and kitchen doos is also a 9 as to my 10 ten stove. Good thing THEY thought of a way to make it work!

  317. Love the stove, will keep it in mind when our ailing stove gives up.
    LOVE the writing – *and* – the comments!
    Has the stove rec’d her name yet? I’d like to put a name up for consideration: “Ima Hottie” (bad pun, bad! BAD!). But it recognizes the function as well as the day it (she?) arrived!
    ok – I need more sleep.
    terrific post, lovely stove – many thanks, as ever
    Nan

  318. hehehehe
    I love the stealth yarn hanging out in the background of the door frame shot. It looks like one of the skeins won a medal πŸ˜‰

  319. It’s a guy thing. I never had any one of them move anything of mine that they didn’t have this problem. I had one particular occasion with a guy who insisted the sloped ceiling of the staircase was tall enough for a very large bookcase to go vertically up the stairs (carried from the bottom by two men who were over 6 feet tall).
    But hey – you got a photo of one of them coming backwards into your kitchen without his pants hanging way below what’s decent.
    THAT’s amazing!
    (LOVE that new stove…)
    (((hugs)))

  320. oy. They just never listen, do they?? I loved Franklin’s comment – his mind is as dirty as mine πŸ™‚ Number me among those who love your backsplash too.

  321. Beautiful stove . . . funny story.
    I have a wonderful stove story too . . .
    When we remodelled in 2004, we put in 12″ tiles. We bought a 36″ stove. So, one evening, I’m standing in the kitchen, adoring the brand new cabinets and floor (said stove is still in packing materials in garage). I looked at my husband and said “it won’t fit.” “Why not?” “12 tiles and the cabinets overhang about the two outside tiles by about 1/2″ from each direction.” “Well, there’s grout between the tiles, it will fit” [NOTE: my DH is not the one that put the tiles or cabinet in but he was still take the male point of view.]
    So he calls a neighbor and they haul in the stove (after taking door off and door off of stove). Lo and behold, it doesn’t fit.
    I have to admit enjoying a perverse satisfaction in calling the contractor (who had been a royal pain in the butt) at 10:00 on a Saturday night (because I could) and telling him that our stove didn’t fit in the space he had allotted.
    If you want to check it out, you can see some of the remodel photos at:
    http://isnoacompletesentence.blogspot.com/2006/11/im-itching-to-remodel-bathroom.html
    I think the picture of the stove is about half-way through that post.

  322. Reminds me of when the new couch arrived and wouldn’t fit up the stairs. So, DH and his friend the piano mover, winched it up using his pickup truck to get it in via the second floor back porch. It was quite a day.

  323. Stephanie, Staephanie, Stephanie. How long have you been married? Maybe yours is exceptional, but in general, men have to figure it out for themselves. You can’t TELL them anything, just lead them towards the light…
    %^@*! beautiful! (and I loved the yarn in the backgroung of the sweating men pic.)

  324. Yeah – but you were using metric. It mighta fit if you’d measured it in inches. πŸ˜‰

  325. First of all, laughing out loud in the pizza shop has given the hired help thoughts of asking me to leave! That’s all right, I just won’t let go of the mouse in one hand and my slice of veggie wonder in the other!! Thanks for the hilarity, Stephanie. Second of all, I think your delivery guys put a nice twist on the proverbial -can’t be done- Syndrome. Their ol’ let’s give a try attitude was certainly entertaining… thanks guys!

  326. Some times the ego won’t let them process what they hear from a non-professional mover/installer (add to that, woman). Too funny.
    Okay, you’ve teased us yet again with the backsplash. At least I can see it a bit better in this photo… well, kinda-sorta-not really. Oh well, who am I kidding? Mosaic tile in my home? Ain’t gonna happen.

  327. Ah, yes. The old problem of paying attention to the wrong things, the wrong people, and impossible “solutions.” Your final photo looks beautiful. I believe I have had clothing sales people bring me garments to try on which would have required that “10 was less than 9.”

  328. OMG !! I am IN HYSTERICS !
    I have serious issues with math, but PUH-LEEZ ! Their “logic” makes me want to get go something of an alcoholish nature and hide in the closet for a while.
    Thank you for the biggest laugh I’ve had today.
    Now, where the heck is the blender… and the salt…
    Cheers !

  329. LMAO ! “get go” should have been “go get”.
    Looks like I’d found the blender already, doesn’t it. Alas, I have not. Maybe I really should though.
    cheers. again.

  330. I second the person who said they love your backsplash. That’s just bea-u-ti-FUL! And they should hire you to advise them on these complex moving situations (algebra is good for something, now, isn’t it. Or is it trig? SIGH. We would have been all day trying to get the stove in MY house).

  331. Oddly enough, I had that argument in reverse with the guys who moved my into my new townhouse. For reasons that I couldn’t understand, they were sure they wouldn’t be able to get my queen-size mattress (which IS squishy) upstairs. But then they tried and, gosh, no problem at all!
    And your stove is beautiful — I would love a gas stove again someday — as is your backsplash!

  332. *snort!!* OK, I passed this post along to my husband, who responded with the following observation: “No one has a better understanding of how an object that’s larger than an opening will not go through that opening no matter what you do than a knitter who has done a sweater and had the neck too small!”
    Not, um, that he knows this because he knows any knitters to whom this actually happened. More than one or two (hundred) times, anyway… πŸ˜‰
    Beautiful stove!! May it produce many happy meals.

  333. Holy cow … 450-some-odd comments.
    The stove looks fantastic. I am giggling over your post. Didn’t you just once want to do a little jig and say “I told you so” in a little sing-song voice? I would have wanted to. LOL

  334. Two words: “negative ease.” Perhaps the delivery guys are closeted sock knitters, members of an elite group of secret sock knitters who can bend gauge to their will any time they want to.
    Or perhaps they can bend space AND time, which explains why they can make a delivery “anytime between 10:00 am and 2:00 pm” and still have a happy customer when they show up at 4:00 pm the next day.

  335. Wouldn’t it be interesting if the stove deliverymen had family members who read knitting blogs? We’ll never know…….

  336. OMG too funny!! I love the stove and the story. I am so jealous. We “upgraded” our kitchen stove about 4 years ago The origial was this beastly 60′ model with an oil burner on the side that was no longer functional, and it chewed thrugh propane like n tomorrow. We drove by a new modulr home here on island and there was this new looking stove on the side of the road heading tote dump. We stopped in (we knew the people, actually we all kno everyone!!!) and they said tat the gas man said it couldn’t be fixed, a mouse had made a nest and a “bathroom”. We decided to try…I mean this stove was literally les than 6 months old. Hubby took it all apart and got all the “uck” out and put it all back together and I whippe up a chocolate cake and we opened all the windows and we have been co ever since!!!

  337. This is probably the *only* blog entry my husband has ever been interested in–after seeing the picture of the installer trying to get the stove through the door. He was disappointed that there wasn’t a picture of the disassembled stove. Can’t please everyone.

  338. Funny story! My chef husband will be very jealous of your lovely new stove. Gas totally rocks over electric.

  339. Sooo funny–
    reminds me of when we moved into our house and bought a new washer and dryer and when the guys from Sears brought them and and looked at our space said “you’ll never be able to open your dryer door all the way in this teensy weensy space if we put this in here” and I said “just pick it up over your heads and slide it in(wanting to say pick it up over your teensy weensy heads) and drop it in and I’ll manage and go away please, I have no clean underwear”
    Whatever–that is an awesome looking stove!

  340. Stephanie,
    I had NO idea that the guys who delivered MY stove AND my refridgerator had moved to Canada! Thank you for helping them…they didn’t listen to ME at all…..
    By the way, I really like the new stove and the part of the kitchen which I can see.

  341. Steph. That’s a beautiful stove. And I’m confident, despite your initial aversion to the bells and whistles, you will come to love love LOVE your new stove in, oh, say – 12 minutes after you do your first baking. Love it.

  342. That is one sexy stove!
    …are you sure 10 is still bigger than 9? I’m willing to bet than on the third Saturday after the equinox at exactly 2:47 a.m. eastern standard time…that 10 is smaller than 9. Really.

  343. I hear Scotty! “Ye canna change the laws of physics!”
    “Cap’n!”
    And…there’s assuredly a bit of ‘idea can’t work, came from a female’ workin’ there. In the Air Force we’d be having a staff meeting and I’d make a suggestion and there’d be eye-rollings, “Oh jeez, it’s Denise and her CRAZY ideas again.” Literally five minutes later, a male colleague would same EXACTLY the same thing…and they’d consider it seriously. “Hm, sounds good, let’s try it!”
    *sigh*

  344. ROFLOL
    Nice stove though. Really nice stove. I’m certain that if I had a stove like that my cooking would improve.
    (I love the photos! Did they know you were behind them with a camera? Only a blogger….!!!)

  345. Your talk of new stovage reminded me that I, too, am in need of a stove. Please if you could — what model is that? It looks lovely.

  346. Sounds like the time we had a sleeper sofa delivered that had to go down into the den in the basement. I finally called my husband and asked him what he thought of having the couch sit in the middle of the basement stairs instead of in the den. Luckily, his math was better than the delivery guys and couches do squish.
    Beautiful stove!

  347. Sexy stove!!!! you would think the guys would opt for least amount of work and heavy lifting on a hot day! Big sigh! Can’t wait until you run the world! πŸ™‚

  348. Great stove, but what I really want to know is did you do the tile yourself? Looks great.

  349. OH my. You have far more patience than I. And a cleaner kitchen. Lady, I’m telling you, every glimpse into your abode reveals cleanliness.

  350. Cracked. Me. Up.
    I originally came for the knitting talk, but stay for the gems like this (as well as the knitting talk).
    Hope you enjoy your fancy-pants new stove. I can only imagine the drying it would have done to the Big Pink Thing. πŸ™‚

  351. You can’t blame them, really. They don’t have your extensive gauge experience!

  352. I’ve noticed that there are some people in life you have to hand feed solutions to and then wait, and wait, and watch them struggle with the impossible until they suddenly come upon a fantastic solution all their own: Yours.
    But of course now it is Their solution and once it is their solution it will work.
    Ah. That reminds me I have a meeting with my Manager later…

  353. You know, I was waiting for this. Because I knew hilarity would ensue– and lo, the saga did not dissapoint.
    (And I had total flashbacks to the couch in Long Dark Teatime of the Soul).
    Many congratulations on the swank new cooker, btw.

  354. Ugh, I feel your pain. In the last six months, we’ve replaced the microwave and the toaster oven and we’re going shopping for a refrigerator today. The refrigerator part is hanging on but the freezer part is shot. I think this hot weather killed it. Thank goodness we have a freezer in the garage, where I’ve moved everything. I’m hoping these appliance burnouts happen in threes and we’re done for awhile.
    I can’t believe you took pictures as they were struggling to get this stove into your house. You’re a much better blogger than I am. I would have been holding my breath, praying my house would be intact after this fiasco.
    All’s well that ends well, I guess. The stove is beautiful and looks lovely in your kitchen. (P.S. I also love the mosaic backsplash. It’s prettier than mine! πŸ˜‰

  355. LOL!! This was a great read! You know what the problem was, Men were moving it in.. not women.. I too am having kitchen envy now..

  356. Many people, most of them men (not all, but most) will not accept a good idea until they believe it is THEIR good idea, not yours. I believe this to be a law of physics (?) just as much as the fact that 10 is bigger than 9. Your stove, however, (and beautiful backsplash) are gorgeous!
    deb g.

  357. Nice stove. Why is it that you tell or suggest to a man how to do something, and at the end, after he has tried it his way and failed, he tell you what you said in the first place like it’s his idea. Sometimes I want to box his ears.

  358. That’s hilarious! My mom-in-law had the SAME EXACT problem a few months ago, with coincidentally, the same exact stove. πŸ™‚
    I’ve yet to see someone make 10 smaller than 9.
    And I’ve seen my share of people trying! πŸ˜›

  359. Okay, Stephanie, I often smile or laugh when I read your blog (unlike almost everything else I read). However, today I have been GUFFAWING, and people who know me know that’s uncommon. Thank you. Knitting is SQUISHY and knitters STILL know that 10 is bigger than 9.

  360. Thank you, thank you, thank you for your running commentary! Hey, next tour can Utah be included?

  361. First of all, beautiful stove! Secondly, why do men think that they can make ___ (insert any type of mechanical item) work when the math/science/etc. is staring them in the face? They will not listen to a _____(non-math/science/etc. minded–she’s female, right, what can she know)female about such things, especially when she is right. An exhusband (especially notice the ex part) would not listen to me when working on his motorcycle but was taking the wrong advise from his numerous brothers standing around. When I suggested he try something, he yelled at me for trying to tell him what to do! My advise turned out to be correct but he would never admit that. ( I guess if I had had a beer in my hand, scratched my crotch, and belched, he wouldn’t have taken my advice-NAW!) You rock girl–and I know that math is not always your strong suit. THEY never listen.

  362. From my 10 y.o. daughter: They could have taken the framing off the sides of the door and then it would be 11 or 12 instead of 9.

  363. OMG! Too funny. I love the way even with diagrams, common sense is just beyond people sometimes. . . . .
    Glad to see that THEY came up with such a good resolution (geez!)

  364. Men!
    Reminds me of when we ordered a new double size boxspring and mattress and we could NOT get it up our stairs, in a fairly new house. Turns out the builder had goofed in the design, and the original purchasers of those units got a big refund. Would have been nice to know when we bought the house so we didn’t have to sleep in the living room for two months while we waited for a split boxspring to be made and delivered!

  365. You know the real problem here? The stove is a cube shape. The delivery men are probably used to working with odd rectangular shapes.
    In the case of a rectangular prism (like a couch) where one dimension is much much longer than another, putting it through the long way is silly, but you can tip or turn it to take advantage of a different, shorter, dimension. But with the stove, all directions were wider than the doorway, so tipping’s not going to help.

  366. Wow! Not that the lady who now owns the really nice stove knows what she is talking about!
    Looks great!

  367. hehehehehe Men. Great thinkers. Don’t ya just love it when they get a “new” idea that is the same as your original idea? funny

  368. And you claimed, in one of your books, to be bad at math. Looks to me like you have grasped the essential purpose of math to describe reality so as to figure out if something will work or not *before* trying to pound the square peg into the round hole.

  369. Very nice stove, and I love the tile on your walls! The efforts to get your new stove into the house sound a lot like what was needed to get our new fridge into ours. Luckily, both you and I have expensive but nice new appliances in our kitchens.

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