A Photoshoot

Me: Hey, Natalie? I finished Amiga.  Will you take some pictures?
Nat: Sure. Backyard?
Me: Great.

(scene change: Natalie and I are in the backyard, and I am standing awkwardly under a tree looking dumpy in a great sweater.)

Natalie: You look odd.
Me: Odd?
Natalie: Yeah, like…un-natural.
Me: This is unnatural.
Natalie: Maybe if you were doing something.  Pose.
Me: A pose?
Natalie: Yeah. Like, do something.
Me:

Natalie: That’s not good. Pretend to be doing something. 
Me: Like I see something? Like in the Sears Catalogue?

Nat: No. That’s bad too. 
Me: Like if I was pruning a plant?

Or a tree?

Natalie.  No. It’s still bad. I actually think you’re getting worse. There’s glare on your glasses.
Me: Sorry.  Bettter?

Natalie: Now you look unnaturally chipper.
Me: How about this?

Natalie: God you’re a dork.
Me.  I know.

(Pattern: Amiga. Yarn: Americo Cotton Flamme. 1.5 skeins. Mods: None. Just knit the longer version, and left off the buttonholes. I don’t button stuff anyway.)

175 thoughts on “A Photoshoot

  1. That is hilarious. That’s how I feel everytime we have to take pictures of me. Thankfully my SIL is a great photographer and good at making me look natural.
    The pruning the plant picture actually looks pretty good.

  2. so cute! and not dorky at all! okay, maybe a little in that tree pruning pose…

  3. Great sweater! That last pose kinda looks as if you were chasing a squirrel, but were totally having a blast doing it.

  4. Haha, got to love when your kids think your a dork and tell you. Love the sweater

  5. I’m all stuffed up with a horrible cold and feeling awful – but you’ve managed to make me laugh out loud! Thankyou. It is a great sweater and you don’t look dumpy at all. Dorky maybe, but definitely not dumpy. 🙂

  6. I wish I was you….so I could do exactly this. Simply put, this is fantastic – and the sweater is amazing!

  7. It’s really too bad you don’t ever have any fun. Ever, ever, ever, ever, never.

  8. All the different angles of the sweater has convinced me that Amiga is going to be my first sweater. Yay!
    P.s. Most of my photoshoots end after a few minutes of my friend Michelle yelling “Look normal!” Yours was great!

  9. I like the one where you’re practically climbing the tree!! Love the sweater and especially the color. Beautiful!!

  10. Exactly why my stepdaughter models my stuff. Im photogenically challenged. 🙂 love the amiga and the postcards from squam!

  11. Dorks of the world unite! The world needs more dorks and more laughs. thanks, you are a treasure.

  12. OK – I never comment because you get so many comments and really who cares if I comment-but I litterally p……….my p………..
    reading this.

  13. You look like you were having so much fun! The captions are totally the icing on the cake! Thanks for making me smile.

  14. You do look pretty dorky, Steph. I think the last photo of me that I like was when I was in my thirties. I try not to pose now and that works a bit better.

  15. LOL… seriously you are the best. Although the one without your glasses looking “chipper” errs on the scary side with you brandishing those clippers…. but this is a great post 🙂 Thanks for sharing your dorkiness with the world so I can feel less crazy about my own dorkiness!

  16. Great post Stephanie!!! I laughed out loud, and it looks like you are having a blast 🙂
    (sweater looks lovely too)

  17. It’s a shame you didn’t think to do the Brides Magazine pose (one arm up high holding bouquet/pruning shears, head tilted up, one arm gracefully back, and shot in profile.)

  18. I’ll tell you what, not only is that a great sweater and the post hilarious, you’ve got great gams.

  19. My daughter has called me a dork twice recently.
    Dork must be the new word for daughters to use when referring to their middle-aged mothers.
    Guess it could be worse.
    Love the sweater!

  20. Best photoshoot ever! I love all the crazy poses…and the sweater is gorgeous too.

  21. Those legs look great—must be all that biking.Do you knit on a stationary bike in the winter?

  22. Every photo attempt by my BF for me ends with me freaking out. I’m asking him why he can’t just take a normal picture of me where I don’t look like a freak and he refuses to answer on the grounds that the question is a trap…I’m learning to use the self timer and a tripod now.
    (I like your plant pruning picture most if you’re going for natural seeming)

  23. You look fabulous. The sweater looks just right on you and the blouse under the sweater is really gorgeous. Picture taking is dismal. I’m convinced I am younger, thinner, prettier etc than the resulting picture indicates…

  24. Love the sweater and the captions! Especially the Sears one – do you know the male version, where he has one hand in his pocket with just the thumb sticking out? Other hand pointing is optional…..

  25. Actually, the plant pruning photo is pretty good – but I suppose by then everything seemed unnatural and dorky!

  26. I love that you are a dork and that you don’t might showing the whole world. great sweater, too

  27. I think you did just fine!!
    Lovely sweater : )
    (I hate posing for pictures…)

  28. No matter how it was modeled, the sweater is beautiful and comfy looking. Love the poses, you are impossibly funny! Save the pictures for your next book and include an essay on how to show off your finished work.

  29. It’s not you that’s the problem, it’s the background, too dark and same looking as the cardi. We wouldn’t call that a sweater downunder here, sweaters have no front opening.

  30. I love the shirt you’re wearing too! For someone who considers herself a fashion nerd, you’re looking’ pretty dang cool there!

  31. I cannot stop laughing. It was the best photo shoot ever.
    thanks once again for brightening my day with laughter.

  32. I laughed so hard I may have peed a little. Love all the shots, but the Sears Catalogue is my absolute favorite. (Love the sweater, too – easy to see why you were captivated by it when you saw it!)

  33. hee hee.. that was so funny that i forgot to look at the sweater!

  34. So funny! I thought the most natural was pruning the plant. But who smiles when pruning?
    Best one was with the pruners/no glasses. Indeed unnaturally chipper. Can you imagine if that was the main photo for the pattern????

  35. Very funny … and while she kept calling you a dork and telling you the shots were getting worse, in fact we all got to actually see the cardi (which is great, btw).
    The pruning shots are perfect.

  36. Those are awesome! I love that you posted the whole shebang. That last one is very “prune like an Egyptian.”

  37. Awesome sense of humor… what can I say? Maybe if you had a CHAINSAW when you went after the poor tree…?

  38. You two were having entirely too much fun! That’s the best thing about great friends…you have fun and can laugh at…er…WITH each other. Thanks for making me smile too!

  39. This is funny. Maybe Natalie should have modeled the sweater and you snapped the pictures. 🙂

  40. Love the Sears catalogue pose! made me laugh. actually all of them did. nice work – and awesome sweater!!

  41. Ha! Ha! I use the “Sears Catalogue” pose whenever I model for my friend QueenieKnits!!!! (you are a dork.)

  42. Noticed the Calves. Nice! And Kudos for a no fall ride. Keep pedaling. It looks good on you!

  43. You gave me a much needed laugh tonite, as you often do. But my DH is in the hospital tonight for the second night and I didn’t think anything could make me laugh. How could I have forgotten that you always can. I’m a dork too, but I love Amiga. Gotta add it to my long queue.

  44. Steph, I saw the tweet comments about your appearance. I decided that beauty is within and you certainly have plenty of that. Your smile is radiant, your eyes sparkle, and that’s where the beauty comes out.
    Sweet blog and lovely sweater.

  45. O M G – that is exactly what my 22 yr old daughter says to me…..amazing.

  46. I really like the plant pruning shot. It looks like you’re doing something you’re familiar with. ;o) Great job on the sweater!

  47. Let me tell you a story. A handful of years ago, I started knitting. Ravelry had not yet been born, but I needed some way to keep track of what I was making for which niece or son for which birthday or Christmas or whatever. So, I started a blog. I told my sister about this, and asked her help in creating an identity.
    She said, “A blog? You? Like the Yarn Harlot’s?”
    Me: “Yeah, just like hers, but probably less funny.”
    Sister: “Well, you can’t be the Yarn Harlot, you’re more of a Yarn Dork.”
    And with that, my Blog was born. So, dear Yarn Harlot, back off my name. I’m the YarnDork.

  48. At least it wasn’t the hottest day of the year (or the coldest on a windy beach), that tends to be when it is time to take pictures for us.

  49. Great smizing. Tyra would approve. Now that you took off your glasses, we can see where your girls got their good looks. And, it looks like you had a lot of fun doing the shoot. Keep it up and never lose the joy.

  50. So…
    these photos are great. But while you had a photographer handy, what happened to Gwendolyn? I seem to remember you saying all you needed was a photographer. Just sayin’.
    Trish

  51. It’s a very fun post. I think it looked all wrong due to the blouse underneath. Either color clash or too close. A whit tshirt would have made new & fabulous sweater go POP!

  52. TOO FUNNY! Loved the post, the pictures, the narrative, and THAT BLOUSE…. The sweater is very nice also.

  53. I love it. Where is Hank when you need him? He gives great direction, as I recall!

  54. Part of the problem was that you put the sweater over something of essentially the same color and shade. If you were wearing a white or pale apricot or primrose yellow top underneath, the photos would have turned out better.
    But the photo of you without your glasses, while holding the pruning shears, scares the sh*t out of me!!! (Joe, if your wife ever greets you with that look, turn tail, run, get to the airport, and get to another continent faster than the speed of light — or your boy bits may suffer muchly!)

  55. Hilarious. Natalie sounds like she could be my daughter taking the pictures. Have a fantastically happy birthday in 3 minutes 🙂

  56. Great sweater. Nice backyard. And I don’t think you look in the least bit weasel-ly.

  57. I love these pictures of you because they are so you. I think they are the best I’ve seen of you….though it could be the pruning shears….
    The sweater is good too. :o)
    Isn’t it GREAT being a dork? I love it!

  58. Very very funny and wonderful. Definitely obvious where the girls got their looks and great figures. Sweater is perfect too.

  59. So cute! And OMG, are you actually wearing a bra? You look wonderful. Happy birthday. 🙂

  60. ahhh, so its not just me, and my son who have these kinda conversations while taking photos…
    Yeah, you are a dork (kinda) but we love you for it 🙂

  61. hahaha, this is awesome.
    ps. read all the time, don’t really comment, but this needs a comment!

  62. Damn Girl….you look buff! Gotta be all that excercise and clean Canadian air! But you made me snort my coffee this morning with the ‘trimming the bush’ picture! Poor lil peony…Momma just had to get the ‘action’ shot!!! Woman Have MERCY! still LMAO!

  63. This is wonderful! Thank you for the giggles this morning!
    (Also, from the comments above, I gather it’s your birthday? May it be filled with love, laughter, and lots and lots of dorkiness!)

  64. Loved this! It gave me a great laugh on what had otherwise started as a difficult day – thanks! 🙂

  65. The sweater is beautiful and you are hilarious. Thank you for the laugh over my Thursday morning coffee. My favourite may be the one without glasses, with pruners, looking especially chipper as you get ready to perhaps castrate some creature.

  66. I remember reading that if the sweater model was in some improbable position the sweater probably had a serious problem, and they were trying to hide it. That author never met a force like the Harlot! Heh!

  67. A photo shoot of me would look much the same, but I’d be too chicken to post it!!
    I cant decide on my favorite…either the tree pruning or the last one.
    Love the post. Love the sweater.

  68. Must be something in the stars … my daughter called me a dork yesterday, too. And she was probably right.

  69. I think it was just a bad day for photos. I was taking some for a friend to send in as a ‘professional association’ photo, and the glare off his forehead was so blinding it looked like someone had chopped him off at the eyebrows.

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  71. Thanks for starting my day with a giggle and a smile! I, too, have trouble posing for photos… I don’t understand how some people can pose and look natural! For the record, you are adorable. 🙂

  72. thank you for making me smile this morning 🙂
    i love the photos and the sweater is just beautiful.

  73. Just read this post for the second time, and yes I’m still giggling. Thanks for the humor. We always need more of it in our lives.

  74. It’s a fine day for a birthday for us…sunny, not too warm or too cold…who cares if we’re all a little dorky.

  75. Where is that wool-stealing squirrel when you need him???
    Congratulations on finishing the summer sweater!

  76. Oh, how I wish I could meet you in person! I think we would really hit it off. Thanks for the wonderful chuckles this morning! By the way the sweater looks beautiful but not as lovely as the wearer.

  77. hehehe…. in a couple of those, it looks less like modelling a sweater, and more like a lovely advertisement for pruning shears. i think you may be on to something. course, you can’t trust my opinion…. as i’m a dork, you see.

  78. Laughing out loud at my desk! Great sweater! Great post! You crack me up! Happy happy birthday!! 🙂

  79. Jamee @ 11:11am – I’m totally stealing your word, “adorkable”! I’ve needed a word like all my life!
    Steph, now you know why we all adork you so much!

  80. Hoppy Birdie to EWE! Beautiful sweater! Dorks Rule!
    @Samina Love that you stole the word…I will probably not be the second thief.
    Anyway Steph, I agree, you are adorkable.

  81. Love the pictures. I can see this exact conversation happening between me and my younger (and hipper, but don’t tell her that) sister. I love it.

  82. Thank you, thank you very much for the morning giggle. I have learned to never drink tea while reading the Yarn Harlot. Tea hurts when it comes out the nose. Never mind what it does to the laptop.

  83. This was a totally awesome photoshoot! And I can’t believe how quickly you finished your Amiga!

  84. This reminded me of my mum and I in photoshoot attempts. Made me laugh out loud 🙂

  85. Taking picture for the blog. Is this a job perk? Or ‘one of those things’? Natalie doesn’t seem to be giving it away – good employee and true Amiga.

  86. Look at those calves! You can sure tell that you’ve been doing marathon bike rides. Good work, and pretty sweater.

  87. This proves that you’re not dorky: You already have a blouse that goes with the distinct shade of sage in your new sweater!

  88. I was away for a while and decided to see what the Harlot was up to and almost spit my pepsi on the computer screen. Then I laughed myself silly. Dear lord, woman, you are a public service to all who need cheering up and then some!

  89. I’ve seen Amiga on a few people in person and I keep wanting to knit it. Still feel that way. Looks good on you and you look like you’re enjoying yourself.
    Dorks rule!

  90. First, OMG, she’s wearing a skirt…then OMG, she’s running with pruners!!

  91. Can’t believe I’m doing this at one-thirty in the morning, (I’m not in North America.) I agree with just about every one here. These were such fun shots. But if you’re really out for a serious picture, I also agree with Anonymous,too that you need some color contrast. You also need some style contrast. That gorgeous *drapey* sweater, paired with a pair of good fitting jeans and a (at least slightly fitted) tee, rather than an equally drapey top, would make the sweater pop. Even with wicked looking pruning shears in your mitts…

  92. Ah, a kindred spirit. This is why most of my revelry posts look like sweaters are knit for tabletops or my area rugs and not of a person.

  93. Oh, wonderful! I love the joy of these. And a woman who is having her picture taken who is just having fun. So rare in our world still.
    Good luck on the rally!

  94. Ok, that picture before last looks scary. Really. But your sweater is really nice and the other pictures are easily better than mine would ever be. Your kid picture is very cute, so funny you’re easily recognisable in it.
    And good luck with the bike ride. Hope you’re not prone to ‘saddle-pain’. I’ve done 70 km once (on a crappy rented bike, admittedly) and couldn’t sit for three days after.

  95. This set of photos and the dialogue made me laugh out loud. Thanks!
    The sweater is beautiful and you look great in it.

  96. PS…HAPPY BIRTHDAY to the WOMAN who makes me laugh…
    ALL the TIME! Love ya HON!!!

  97. Actually, I like all the different poses. It helps to see the garment in a lot of different aspects and the running commentary a good laugh. TFS (thanks for sharing). Love that you let us know of any modifications too, that is lovely.

  98. Love all the picts (tho in that “Chipper” one you look kind of like you’re going to do something evil with those pruners.)
    Love the sweater 🙂

  99. Thanks for posting the entire photo shoot–so very funny! And you were right–that sweater is in Your Perfect Color.

  100. You managed to show this cardi from several essential angles. Great job.
    I think what made you look unnaturally chipper was the clipper. “What may I prune for you?”

  101. Hilarious – I am sure that is an exact conversation I will have with my older daughter in several years. Or maybe next week…

  102. Once again you reinforce my love for you with your wit, charm and endless personality shining through in pictures and words. I resisted casting this sweater on and now I’m digging through the stash to find the yarn that will do it justice, all the while knowing I’m going to buy the same yarn you did and hope mine comes out half as nice. If you only knew how much we all wished we could have been Natalie, who has the best job in the WHOLE world (because she gets to hang out with you) you would likely be shocked. We love you Stephanie. We really do.

  103. Pshaw on the sweater! look at those well toned bike legs!!!! Go yarnharlot!
    Dude, I had to go look up clipless pedals. I think I’d take my chances with the regular flat ones.

  104. Yup, you’ve got the reluctant model look down. But with all those ‘action shots’ you’ve done a great job of actually showing off that pretty summer sweater, which I’m also knitting. Gives me some ideas on how long I’m going to do the body and sleeves. (Actually, the garden-shear shot works really well.)

  105. Oh, I just laughed till I cried. It was the prunning the tree pose that got me. The sweater is awesome. Thank you for such a funny post!

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