Randomly on a Wednesday

1. Thank you, thank you, for your lovely response to our blogiversary. We’ve been together such a long time now, but Blog, you made the day chock full of magic. I loved the idea of charities being inundated with $12 donations. Count on you lot to always figure out the right thing. Thank you.

2. I thought things weren’t so bad over here, but I was wrong. When I got sick during the week I was supposed to use to catch up from being on holidays something went really, really sideways over here.  There’s not a single room I can go into that doesn’t make me flinch with undone work. This place is a mess. My inbox is a mess. My desk is a mess.

3. You know that thing where someone tells you their place is a mess- maybe you’re knocking on the door, and they say “Ok do come in, but I apologize, the place is a disaster” and then you walk in, and immediately realize that the two of you don’t share a meaning for the word “disaster”? Like, you wish your place was as tidy as their disaster? This is not what I’m talking about here. This place is trashed. I’m at the pretend-not-to-be-home-when-the-doorbell-rings phase.

4. All attempts to get my life and the place I live in back under control have resulted in either knitting or naps. My to-do list now spans three large post-it pads, and I’ve started writing things on it like “get control of life” or “fix everything”.

5. This is as effective as you imagine.

6. I’m still plugging along on Siren Song – I’m just over halfway done, which surprises me because I feel like I’m knitting on it a lot, and being super faithful to it. It’s a lot of knitting though – long rows, and the only way I can actually tell that I’m making progress is that I’m onto the second ball of yarn.

7. I didn’t take a picture because it looks exactly. the. same.

99 thoughts on “Randomly on a Wednesday

  1. I’ve got a pair of latvian mittens staring at me and demanding thumbs. I’m avoiding their gaze currently. I understand your plight. Between class and work I’m finding a lot less time for things like cleaning or knitting as well. God speed.

  2. Sounds like you need a vacation from your vacation. Try to give yourself a break from expectations at least. You were gone a week. You were sick a week. These things take time to recover from.

    Just relax in the knowledge that clearly, THE BLOG loves you!

  3. Honey, just breathe. No one ever died from a messy house. Pick one small thing you can do, do that, and then rest/knit/nap. Pick something else, repeat. Eventually the mess will retreat back into the corners with the dust bison and you can pretend to be in control. Until the next time.

  4. I daresay you eat a dust bison exactly the way you eat an elephant: one bite at a time. Give yourself a break.

    Hey, remember when you hired Natalie as your assistant? Use the same strategy and hire a cleaner to get you on top of it. You of course will take your laptop to the good coffee shop where there’s wifi, so you can stay calm.

  5. Sweetie, I’d send you photos of my place, but I’d be terrified you’d sic the by-law/health dept./yer-jess-livvin-rong-poe-lees on me. Trust me — really, truly — your place is waaaaaaaaay cleaner and tidier than mine is.
    Ever.
    Evereverevereverever.

    Deep breaths + penicillin — that’s my motto.

  6. I have three young kids, aged 0, 2 & 4. The house is *always* a wreck, the to-do list never ends, and I’m learning to be (mostly) OK with that. Remember those days? Transport yourself back for a moment, have a cup of coffee, and try to let it go! 🙂

  7. Set a timer for 15 minutes. Pick up a basket, and fill it with everything in one room that belongs in a different room. Bring the items to the room(s) they belong in, and place them in the middle of the floor. Go back to the original room. Repeat until the timer rings.

    Do something you enjoy for a while.

    Set a timer for 15 minutes. Go to a room you put misplaced items in, and put them away. Repeat until the timer rings.

    Do something you enjoy for a while.

    • This is what I do, except I use a box. Sometimes the item returns to the room where it belongs but there’s no room for it there. That’s when the box gets filled with stuff for goodwill and is set in front of the front door so I’ll trip over it when I try to leave. That way I remember put it in the car and, hopefully, sometime that week, I’ll deliver it to goodwill.
      It sounds rather obvious, but most of us have far too much stuff and our places look cluttered because all that stuff needs a home. In the last year I’ve started asking myself questions when I’m in a store. Questions like “where will this live?”, “what will have to leave to make room for this?” and “can someone else use the stuff that this stuff will replace?” I’m buying a lot less but I still have too much stuff!

      • I don’t even use a box (it’s pointless, my two year old would just remove all the things). I just put things away for 5 minutes (with the timer) once a day. Things are still messy, but it has been a spectacular imrpovement.

      • We have three generations under our roof, with matchbox cars amid the AARP magazines. If I didn’t have to manage fall risks, I hate to think how high the piles would get.

  8. Maybe you have the six week virus that is going around. I spent two weeks feeling absolutely wiped out, wondering why I wasn’t feeling better already, another week thinking surely I was getting better, but it wasn’t until the fourth week that I actually felt different. I am In the 5th week now, at 98%. I heard about this six week thing early on – but I didn’t believe it until now. Good luck, feel better soon.

    • I think I have this too. I’m at the end of week two and I am still exhausted and cranky and teary. At least now I have a name for it….

    • I’m at the end of week 3 and the crud I’m coughing up! And, yes, I’ve been to the doctor and I’m on antibiotics, but I don’t think I needed them. I think it’s a virus (still, I’m glad I did try the antibiotics because, otherwise, I’d wish I had). Cough, cough. Everyone looks at me, but 3 weeks in, I can’t still be infectious, can I?

  9. My mother long ago reminded me that “clutter is patient”. And after she died, my sister and I found a little magnet Mom had made, that said “Dust keeps, if you don’t get it wet.” Those are my go-to mottos that I pull out when the dust and dog hair gets too thick (and really, what is “too” thick?).

    • I love those! My favorite is “This Mess is a Place”. It comes after it’s been a mess for quite some time and acceptance sets in.

  10. For a while, add to the “To-Do” list only those things you have already done. Then cross them out.
    You’ll be amazed how good it makes you feel!

  11. Your place is a mess?? You’d scream if you saw mine. . .the bathtub is teething and learning to growl.

    However, I can offer this cleaning tip: If it moves, it’s a pet or a family member. If it doesn’t, it’s clutter or a dust bunny.

  12. I AM at the “don’t answer the door” phase. I am trying not to think about it. My current motto is “Slow Progress is Still Progress” (and sloth slow is the speed we are speaking of). And Thank You for tweeting about Bell Let’s Talk, and the money that will be raised today for mental health awareness and initiatives.

  13. Back in the day I made a counted cross-stitch piece that says:”CAUTION: This house will eventually be cleaned.” It hung on the wall next to the front door. If gloating over your messy house makes someone feel better about themselves, you’ve done a good deed. Rest up and soldier on 🙂

  14. I wish I had a clever cleaning tip for you, but I finally got all the cookie crumbs out of the key board so I could type. I also have 3 cats and a dog trying to donate fur to every surface possible. I like the set a timer tip. You could try sorting the flotsam and jetsam in 3 piles, keep, donate or toss. Some how having 1 clean surface in the house boosts my mood. Good luck and * rest and knit, repeat from *.

  15. Have you heard of the Konmari method of tidying up? It’s a method developed by a woman named Marie Kondo and I think it would be right up your mindful, gracious, world-affirming and gratitude-filled alley.

    • Oh, yeah! Book form: “The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up”. Comes in audiobook. Really thought-provoking, and potentially very encouraging!!

  16. Stephanie I have always been a firm believer in letting my children clean their own rooms with some nagging from me if it starts seeping out of their doorway, and also if they leave something in another room that should not be there then they can take it and put it away. Also emptying the dishwasher, putting on a load of washing or taking it off the line, or a quick vacuum do help me out too. Remember that your a family so everyone should help out. It doesnt always work out that way but I try to make it work. I hope that your feeling better very soon.

  17. If anyone ever figures out how to be a mom, wife, friend, teacher, volunteer,etc…keep a clean house…and still have time to do things that are fun for me; I wold love to hear it. But something usually has to give and I generally vote for housework. It WILL get caught up eventually. It Will happen. It always does when small steady steps are taken. Cheer up! And sorry…I may have contributed to the full inbox. My apologies for the bad timing.

  18. I am so there with such regularity. What I’ve learned to do is just go with it – the sudden naps and knitting ambushes – and not worry about it. It always turns out that a cleaning frenzy seizes me after a few days of it, and I find myself getting 5 times as much done in one day as I could *possibly* have done in 5 days of trying to force myself to do housework. So I say, go with the naps and the knitting – or call up your girls and get them to help. What the heck are grown kids for, if not to step in and help out their dear old Mom once in awhile?

  19. After spending ten days down with that plague, my place is also a disaster. So much a disaster, after three loads of laundry and three loads of dishes, I still felt the need to call my housekeeper and delay for two days. It’s probably the best for her anyway, given the germs around this place. UGH.

  20. When I was in my 20’s and living away from home, Dad would call me a couple of days before Mom was due back from a trip and ask me to come help him get the house back to Moms level of order and cleanliness for dinner out when we were done at the end of a long day and $50 pocket money. It was a big chunk of money for them but he figured he’d spend twice that trying to make it up to her if he didn’t clean it up to her standards and even if it wasn’t to her standards it was evident he tried which got him bonus points.
    A chaotic house just means you’ve had a busy life outside the house.
    We all need help now and then and we forget it’s okay to ask for it.
    You’ve got girls that know what level of order and clean keeps you in your comfort zone….because you trained them as they grew up in your house.
    Ask the Ladies to help Mom and Dad out…if you’re lucky, they may haul some of their old stuff back home with them! 🙂

  21. When I’m slogging away at a project that seems endless, I weave a bit of scrap yarn in at the start of every new day’s knitting, back and forth throughout the project like a basting stitch that can easily be removed at the end. This gives me a bit more motivation because I can see more easily how much I’ve accomplished on any given day.

  22. OK, here goes.. check out a book outa Japan called “the life-changing magic of tidying up” by Marie Kondo. Very popular in the States and I think it is charming. Not that I have tidied yet but…

  23. Stop thinking about the mess. Seriously. Pick something up and put it away. Repeat until you get bored. Then knit. Or nap. Or whatever. When you feel like it, go back to putting things away again. But don’t think about it. Don’t even look at the whole mess. The more you look, the more overwhelming it is. So don’t look and don’t think. Just do it. And yes – this advice originally came from a 10 year old child. And it’s how I keep my house tidy.

    • I like that advice! What smart child. I suffer from asthma and COPD so my housecleaning has to be done in small sessions. Using her advice, I know I’ll be able to get more done with a whole lot less stress.

  24. Talking about “getting control over life” – have you tried a Bullet Journal? It’s a free journaling/organization/time management tool that I find very useful. Other knitwear designers had recommended it to me on Twitter, and it really helps :))

  25. Man, I like the Blog’s priorities.
    It strikes me that cleaning a house is a lot like a birth–well, it can be long and painful, but at least you can drink while doing it. Cheers, Missus!

  26. I am expert at acceptance and management.
    Absolutely spend time organising a list. On the top has to be write list, then tick it off.

    Plan your day realistically from the list then praise yourself when you get half of that done.

    Napping goes in the list! That is your get well job that is priority.

    Decide you are going to do everything with relaxed effortless and go with the flow.

    Trust me it will work. I have though had 7 years of practice.
    Thoughts and Love.

  27. I’ve been stuck on #4 since I tore the cartilage in my right knee in the middle of the night & spent 8 hours in the ER two & half years ago. Forget it kid, knit & pour another glass of wine.

  28. I found this in yesterday’s emails. It could be the source of your problems.

    A.Word.A.Day
    with Anu Garg

    siren song

    PRONUNCIATION:
    (SYR-uhn song)

    MEANING:
    noun: An enticing appeal that ultimately leads to disaster.

    ETYMOLOGY:
    From Siren, one of a group of sea nymphs, whose enchanting singing lured sailors to shipwreck on the rocks around their island. Also see femme fatale. Earliest documented use: 1568.

    USAGE:
    “We must reaffirm our commitment to the principles of open society and resist the siren song of the likes of Donald Trump and Ted Cruz, however hard that may be.”
    George Soros; The Terrorists and Demagogues Want Us to Be Scared. We Mustn’t Give in; The Guardian (London, UK); Dec 28, 2015.

    See more usage examples of siren song in Vocabulary.com’s dictionary.

    A THOUGHT FOR TODAY:
    To a poet, silence is an acceptable response, even a flattering one. -Colette, author (28 Jan 1873-1954)

    We love your comments. Post them here.
    Or you can email us at words@wordsmith.org.
    Unsubscribe | Subscribe | Update address | Gift subscription | Contact us

    © 1994-2016 Wordsmith.org

  29. Thank you! I am suffering from avoid the front door as well. It seems every surface in the house is covered with piles of unrelated things. I am stressed, so I knit….now there are half done projects in sunny rooms. And I just dressed a loom in my living room! Dishes are done but that seems to be it. I am so relieved to not be alone in this momentary (hopefully) disarray. I just want to get it sorted out before our God-daughter shows up for a 4 day visit!

  30. Aw, relax. Your real friends visit you, not your house. When you’re sick you have no apologies to make. Anyone bothered can pick up a few things themselves. Retrain your inner critic! Tidyness is overrated. When I was running ragged w/long hours at work, I kept the kitchen essentials and the bathroom essentials clean, period. My husband even pitched in, excellent training. Give yourself a gift of a cleaner once in a while, if the above doesn’t work. I have a dear friend whose gift to women recovering from surgery, divorce, and other disasters, is a clean house–he sends a cleaning service. I do this now for myself when I can’t stand it and I don’t have time either. Lovely. My cleaning helper is a member of our family now, as she loves to be the clean angel and takes her job very seriously. Her pay helps keep a lot of people going so I feel like I’m helping a whole community. Take it easy on yourself, Stephanie. After you feel better, think about a sustenance plan in case of future illness, and in case you get less able to do so much. That is the humbling lesson of my own aging; I just can’t do as much as I used to, and a little help is welcome.

  31. If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, “Who could have done this? We have no enemies.” —Phyllis Diller

  32. As BDU, I order you to rest up, knit and nap until you are fully well. Too much fretting activates germs and makes them worse. I know this from personal experience.

    My portion of the house has been trashed for I don’t know how long. I can’t seem to find the time or energy to clean. And I haven’t even been physically ill. But last night I finally couldn’t stand the filthy toilet in my bathroom a moment longer and cleaned it and the floor around it. Took maybe six minutes. I probably spent more time in the past week shuddering over it. Clearly I need to adjust my cleaning strategy to cleaning one thing each day instead of fretting over not having enough time to clean the whole room. It doesn’t have to be all or nothing.

    Clearly, while I’m benevolent, I’m not omniscient, or I would have figured this out before now.

  33. I love how you described your house. Mine is a match to yours right now! My husband had surgery, I have three teenagers, two puppies, three cats and lots of STUFF! I have UFO’s in every bag in every corner. I am attempting to work from home and also do a little clean up. I may just throw in the towel and knit something! lol

  34. #1 – Rest. Keep warm. Forcing yourself back to the grindstone before your body is done being sick just makes you weaker for longer.
    #2 – Start calling your living room your ‘studio’. People have lower expectations of studios.
    #3 – If you *must* tidy, tidy for a half hour by the clock. Set a timer. Then reflect on your success, and go take a nap or snuggle up with some easy knitting and a cup of cocoa.

  35. I love how the Ravelry queue for ‘Siren Song’ spiked from almost 0 to 77 the day Steph blogged about it.
    That type of popularity surge happens every time.

  36. Do yourself a favor and get some group paticipation in the clean up. You sound like something of a neat freak in your heart and soul. If Hubby, or kidlets are the problem, go back to when they were little. Start gettingon their little cases about cleaning up after themselves. That includes Hubby. Also, if you have adult children still living with you, they have a responsibility to actively participate in keeping the house clean on a regular basis.

    You can have a cleaning day. With just your husband and you officially the only ones there, things should not get messy. Mine if Thursday, with laundry on Tuesday.

    Of course, the last option is that you hire someone to do the cleaning on a weekly basis. Treat yourself, you deserve it. There is nothing wrong with doing that. You have a blog, your cycling, and other activities. This is not self-indulgence, but taking the stress out of your life. It will also provide employment to someone.

    Tame the beast!!

  37. My husband and I live and work out of our 1100 sq ft. house. Then there are the knitting projects. He has COPD and all our neighbors have much cleaner houses because they hire a cleaner. The fun neighbors keep coming back and the picky ones stay away. That works fine for me.

    Thanks I approaching week 4 of crud recovery and thought I was cured, but that explains feeling tired just thinking about cleaning the house. Instead there is $12 that needs a new home.

  38. I don’t know what to say….I’ve started this thing where I get up at 4:00 in the morning, a half an hour before I start getting ready for work. Anyway, I move very quietly around the house tidying up. It’s a kind of meditation for me. I have to be quiet and walk softly not to wake another. It works, I have my quiet time, the house stays clean, things are organized and I’m not crabby about a house that was always a mess. Also, I’ve heard that 4:00 a.m. is called the Witch’s Hour. Maybe I’m in good company at that time.

  39. When I went back to college at the age of 43, to take computerized office administration courses, having managed to survive most of my life to that point without using a computer, I had two small boys – two really small boys, one in Kindergarten and one in Grade 2. An older lady in my class said to me “Two years. You can go two years without cleaning your windows before the crud is really hard to get off. Just do the essentials until you are through this; worry about the details afterwards.”
    Words to live by, for the eternally housework-challenged. Thank you, Eleanor.

  40. I was reading an exchange yesterday between two women: one said her house was just too messy for the other to drop by; the second snapped a picture of her family room and hit send on her phone. The first laughed and said, Come right on over.

  41. In reference to the huge to-do list: when mine gets out of control, I like to add little pick me ups to it. Such as “be awesome” because it is something that can be crossed off right away and it makes me feel like I’ve accomplished something before I go take my nap. 🙂

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    Of course it’s up to you how much you really want to do!
    Thank you for your book “Knitting Rules!” I love it.

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