In Which I Do Not Complain

I am, dear friends, still knitting the baby blanket.  Progress is alarmingly slow, since it turns out that I might have totally misjudged the amount of knitting this really is. 

This is another example of optimism VS reality, which is a recurrent theme in my knitting, and another yet another disappointing check-in with my own intellect.  If I had thought about it, it would have made perfect sense.  Each repeat of the edging pattern is about 540 stitches to knit, and there are about 110 repeats to get around the edges. This means that to finish the border, I’m coming in somewhere around 59 000 stitches to be knit.  At my normal cruising speed, allowing for sips of coffee, turning at the end of rows etc,  I should expect that this will take about 990 minutes, or 16.5 hours.  (I think that’s right.  Whenever I start throwing numbers around everyone should remember that I’m someone who took four kicks at the can to nail a grade ten math credit.)

That means that each side of the blankie should take about 4 hours, and I guess that’s what it’s taking, but it seems like a whole lot more. (This is likely because I don’t have four hours a day to knit, although I think I do, but that’s a whole other set of delusions.  There’s also the fact that this blanket might be much bigger than I thought it was before it started coming off the circular, but again – a delusion for another day.) I’ve got one side left – I’ve knit 83 out of the estimated 110 repeats this bad boy is going to take, and I would ever so much like to finish today.  Ever so much.  I’ve started cruising the internet looking for the next great project, and that’s always a sign that I’m sick to death of what I’m knitting on. 

Even though I can see an end in sight, this project feels like it’s taking forever – and it’s starting to be less than a total thrill to work on it.  I know that if I just keep going, it will end.  It has to.  It’s a total law, but man, am I just about stinking done with it. 

I was thinking that this morning, as I sat down to do a repeat or two before work  and I actually thought for one minute "Man, this is never going to end, it totally blows that I’m still on this blanket – " and I almost wrote a blog post complaining about how long the blanket was taking, and how sick of it I was – and then I had a thought that stopped me dead in my tracks, and I was suddenly completely grateful that I was knitting a ginormous baby blanket and that I had merely to work on it.

That thought was that if I actually voiced a complaint about this? That knitting this baby blanket was something that I was sort of sick of – that Super-Pregnant-Jen would be over here as fast as her full uterus would let her, with the absolute intention of beating the living snot out of me. I’m pretty sure I could outrun her, but it wouldn’t stop her from screaming "YOU’RE SICK OF KNITTING THE BABY’S BLANKET? HOW ABOUT MAKING THE BABY, YOU LUNATIC. EVER STOP TO THINK THAT MIGHT BE A BIT OF A STRAIN, YOU NON-PREGNANT-IN-AUGUST SNOT! YOU’D LIKE TO FINISH IT? YOU’D LIKE TO FINISH? TELL ME AGAIN HOW YOUR PROGRESS FEELS SLOW, AND STOP RUNNING YOU COWARD" All the while flinging whatever hard things were within her grasp at me,  aiming deliberately for my soft parts.

I think our friendship might be a wee bit awkward after that, so no.  I’m not complaining.  The blanket is going fine, and I’m happy to knit it as quickly as I am able for as long as it takes, and I’m not even thinking about socks.  Thanks for asking.

184 thoughts on “In Which I Do Not Complain

  1. Aw I feel for her. But that blanket is huuuuuge. I hope it is not a resemblance of poor Jen’s baby size!

  2. Gosh, I hope Super-Pregnant Jen doesn’t read you blog 🙂
    On the other hand, when she sees that gorgeous picture, she just might come over and rip the unfinished blankie out of your hands.

  3. Thirty years ago, I thought “pregnant in July” would never end so Super-Pregnant Jen has my sympathy. Knit faster and stop not-complaining! It’s beautiful.

  4. Things could be so much worse doll. You could be knitting the blanket for one of your daughters!

  5. preggers in August? And you’re debating making her wait? I’d probably help her by finding hard things to throw at you, or at least holding you down so she could aim better…

  6. From what I can see in the picture, it looks like it’s going to be a winner – lovely.

  7. You know you’re friends when that kind of scenario can be made public. Though it’s entirely possible that some of the rest of us would have set Jen up in a comfy chair with a footstool, a lemonade and a gigantic SuperSoaker while chasing you back into play, lurking under couches (sorry, chesterfields) to grab at your ankles and stringing alpaca trip-wires. Game on.

  8. I know your pain. It’s the old “I’m tired of this damned project & I want to fling it on the floor until I’m ready to work on it again” thing. I suffer from the very same ailment. Socks now, are small, fast, portable & over quickly. Take the blanket, find an air-conditioned coffee shop like Starbucks, invite your pals & spend time KIPing. The time will fly by . . .

  9. How about posting that edging pattern. Now you could help many by doing that!?!

  10. Steph, You are a dear, all your struggle through these summer months will help you feel, how Jen is now feeling.
    The reward will be long lasting when Jen’s baby uses this wonderful blanket for her first child.

  11. My middle child was born on August 16 so my sympathies are with Jen and I’m all about Ram’s plan – but Holy Cow – the Blankie is just GORGEOUS! Well Done.

  12. If I have it correct,the baby comes the day of or the day after you finish the blanket.
    Be a GOOD friend and finish the blanket so Jen can deliver her baby.
    This way everyone wins.

  13. I’m also making a baby in August (due soon) so I feel her pain. I’m not waiting for anyone to finish a blanket, so I wonder what it is I’m waiting for? Maybe I should start another blanket, a tiny stroller blanket in super chunky yarn, and finish it to speed things along. Have you ever tried that strategy?

  14. That baby will be carrying her blankie around with her until she’s 18–well worth the work, Steph!

  15. I’m sure the baby and the baby blanket will be worth the effort and the wait. Congratulations to both of you on (almost) finishing. Of course Jen may realize soon that when you’re done, you’re finished. Her big job is just starting!

  16. Blanket is gorgeous & you will finish soon.
    did you feel the earthquake? Reports are that T.O. felt it too.

  17. Funny, isn’t it, how right in the middle of a rant about our own situation, we suddenly remember someone else who has it ever so much worse? The Universe likes to give us a kick in the tush when we need it now and again.

  18. It is a law of nature that the closer you get to being done, the more it feels like you’re not making any more motion.
    I believe a great philosopher once put it “… the nearer your destination the more you’re slip sliding away.”

  19. Oh, I thought the earthquake was the blanket being finished! We felt it here in Vermont, too. It’s beautiful, by the way. The blanket, I mean.

  20. Just how big is this blanket? You’re knitting it for a human baby, not a hippo, right? Sorry Jen, I’m sure you feel like you’re carrying a hippo in this weather! Just bind off wherever you are & call it done. Jen won’t mind.

  21. Oh my…pregnant in August? Hmmm…celebrating the 15th birthday of my twin boys this weekend! My dear husband was an 11-pound baby, so we had big fears that I’d deliver two 11-pounders. Lucky for me, the two of them ended up weighing just under 12 pounds. But I can feel for Jen in the summer misery. It isn’t like you can find a comfortable position to sit in, can’t run around the house naked (without scaring yourself when glancing in the mirror), and the big comment from everyone seems to be “Oh you poor thing, you must be miserable in this heat.” (Duh, ya’ think?)
    Go, Jen, go! It is indeed worth the work and the waiting. And wow, will you be happy when it is done!

  22. Not that long ago, I had a couple of friends in the family way, and decided that I should knit up a couple of quick baby blankets for gifts. “Quick baby blankets” turned out to be somewhat of an oxymoron, of course. I realized too late that the yardage for each was about the same as an adult sweater. Those darn things nearly broke me down, I have to admit. Yours is lovelier, larger, and in a finer weight than either of the two I did. I’m sure Jen will love it, and someday that baby will, too.

  23. I feel your pain. I’ve been knitting a blanket since March and took 2 months off. When I picked it up again I realized why I stopped 3 rows from the cast off. The cast off is a knitted lace edge and is 8,107 stitches.
    Good luck, sorry your knitting a blanket in August.

  24. LOL – the sixth paragraph needs to be marked NSFW. I have a headache now, stifling my laughter.

  25. Oh good lord, that’s a beautiful blankie. The extra-pregnant Jen will be thrilled to place her babby there. But then, she wouldn’t be extra-pregnant then…hm…

  26. If this happens plz to be having someone video it and post it on youtube. Kthanxbai. :p

  27. The blankie is gorgeous. I’m doing a baby blankie too that there is no end to…I’m hoping to run out of yarn and that will be that! Oh! You tried that too. 😉

  28. Horrible how this ‘lack of ability in math’ comes back to bite you. I can wear that T-shirt, and I have played the real-life video too many times.

  29. LOL- I have definately been there (sick of a project) but, I’ve also been pregnant in the summer(not a huge picnic either). Hope it works out for your both- the blanket is beautiful 🙂

  30. Thirtyfive years ago, I too was sitting in a lawn chair to water the garden because I couldn’t stand up to do it. DD was born on the LAST day of Aug. Jen – my sympathy.
    But you are going to be getting one heck of a pretty blanket to go with you new little one!
    Everyone hang in there. As they say, “this too shall pass”! LOL

  31. HAHAHAHA! Love your reality check. Oooh, I think Jen’s baby will likely carry that gorgeous blankie home, wrapped around Jen’s grand-baby! Surely a fine heirloom, and a terrific effort, and just keep plugging….this too shall pass.

  32. I also feel your pain. I am knitting EZ’s Pi Shawl and I am doing a garter stitch border knitted perpendicular to the center. For some reason I thought that I would like a really wide border so I made it 30 stitches wide. So: 30 stitches x 2 rows for every main body stitch x 576 main body stitches = 34560! UGH! I need to finish soon because the unkintted body stitches are starting to felt a little.

  33. This blanket is gorgeous! I love it, and think that knitting a full size blanket any month of the summer is pretty insane. At least my blanket is modular and thus not in my lap all the time.

  34. well, at least it is absolutely gorgeous, and I think there are many of us who have been on both sides of that equation, both the thrower and the throwee……I remember crying in the ob’s office because I had read all the magazines in the waiting room… I was back the next week and the nurse had gotten new ones specially for me. Don’t cross those pregnant women!
    When push comes to shove (pun intended) what will be remembered is how beautiful it is, cuz it is..

  35. I had the August baby blues twice, first child was born near the end of October, second born in December. “Get that blanket done” and start a “thank goodness that’s done ” project something like bed socks for the mama, or something fun.
    Good thing I wasn’t drinking anything when I read the post, I would be wiping up a mess.A good laugh

  36. Just think how long it would take us mere mortals who knit and much slower speed than you do.

  37. On Jen’s behalf, from someone who once gave birth at the beginning of September: Thank you for not complaining. 🙂
    And to both of you: Just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming…

  38. I feel your pain! I’ve been knitting a beige sweater forEVER! Beige. What possessed me to by the yarn!?! I HATE Beige! And yeah. Preggos in August..UGH! At least she’s not in Texas where it’s been over 100 degrees (F) for almost 20 days.

  39. As many have already expressed, this *is* why we adore you! But *shudder* edging. Ugh (not yours, mind you, just the concept itself).
    I think you ought to take requests for movies/show marathons to indulge in while knitting this beautiful behemoth of a baby blanket.
    True Blood? Big Love? Harry Potters back to back?

  40. Beautiful blanket. Tell Jen it could be worse, she could be pregnant in August and live in Texas — so far 56 days of temps at 100 or more where I live so far this summer, and forecast is calling for more of the same.

  41. It’s a gorgeous blanket, and the baby will be cuddled in it soon. I wanted you to post this pattern for me someday! But reading about that edging, I kinda don’t know if I’d have the guts to knit it. 🙂 Hoping tomorrow’s post is about two FOs, the blanket and the baby!

  42. Well, the blanket is absolutely gorgeous, and it’s not even blocked yet! (The same is probably true of the baby, in some cosmic sense….)

  43. The blanket looks gorgeous! Here is wishing you the best of luck finishing it.
    You can do it, finish that blanket!
    And please consider posting the pattern (for all those who wish to embark on this lovely journey of knitting-ness).

  44. I shall be sending you the invoice for the new keyboard I need…
    I’m knitting a baby blanket too. And do you wanna know what I’m going to start on as soon as it’s done?
    Another baby blanket.

  45. Steph you know you just fibbed when you said you weren’t even thinking about socks….we read you too much and too often to know that you weren’t being totally truthful.

  46. Hilarious post Stephanie, and a beautiful blanket.
    But I have to send out a virtual high five to whirlybird at 4:22 for the Paul Simon quote!

  47. that was hilarious. i’m at work and i shed a few tears in the effort to not laugh outloud. thanks for sharing and good luck with the knitting!

  48. It is a beutiful blanket. Just remember that not only will Jen’s baby use it, but probably Jen’s grand baby and great grand baby. Lucky Jen!

  49. Also – after you’re done with the blanket, you’re done. After Jen is done growing that baby? She’s got twenty years ahead of her to raise that child. Maybe twenty-five. If I were you, I’d finish that blanket tonight, even if you don’t sleep, and then be very, very thankful. Very.

  50. I once made a wedding dress for a friend who was on a diet.
    The 5th or 6th time I took the bodice apart to make it smaller, I found myself thinking not-very-nice thoughts very loudly.
    I had to stop and put in a good, romantic movie (Casablanca) and remind myself how much I loved (and still do) the person I was making the dress for (and her fiance). How lovely she would look in it (she did). How it would make her look and feel beautiful on her special day (it did).
    I also sent her an email that said if she lost 1 more pound I was going to kill her. But she understood that… she is a good friend 🙂
    This is the reason I only make wedding dresses for people I really *really* like.
    I expect endless baby blankets are the same.

  51. The blanket is so lovely – stunning actually – and your friend will love it forever – way to go!

  52. Wow you knit FAST! I wish I knit that fast! that’s like 60 st per min! 59400 stitches /990mins = 60stitches per min! thud! at best I am about 17 stitches per min. My hats off to you o’ Great Harlot! And if I just shattered a delusional bubble, I am sorry and will go bury myself in acrylic yarn stuffs.

  53. You are soooooo funny!! I know you’re probably ready to be done with the blankie, but man, it is gorgeous!!! One lucky baby. Wonderful heirloom!

  54. ..we do tend to forget after 20 or so years just what iti is like to carry something like 14 to 20 pounds of person, water and blood around for more than 3/4 of a year…don’t we?
    Knit away my dear….

  55. You know all this writing about pregnant friends and knitting baby blankets is sure to do nothing for your feminist street cred with a certain blogger over at the Huff Post.
    Oh, yeah, that’s right – you’ve got book numero 7 coming out … carry on, NYT best-selling author, carry on.

  56. My DIL is pregnant in August also – due in just three weeks. My son told me that last night she told him to just please leave the house and go out, so she could relax without him checking her mood and pulse every five minutes. It’s their first obviously…LOL.

  57. it’s an incredibly beautiful blanket, likely worthy of the 59,000 stitches. plus, you are making me feel much better about Citron, my next project, which has some 500 odd stitches at the end of some of the increase rows. that was making me think about reconsidering. now i can just tell myself it’s not 59,000. see how much good you do for the rest of the knitting world?

  58. oh yeah, pregnant in August. Heat wave of 1993, I was taking the train to New York 5 days a week and felt like a cow. But I still trotted to the quilt store for border fabric for his quilt the day before his due date, and finished the quilt sometime when he was 1 year old.
    So you’re doing just fine, and it’s totally gorgeous. If I start knitting one now, maybe I’d have it ready for grandchildren!

  59. It looks LOVELY especially the border. Totally looking forward to seeing the photo of it al blocked and draping gracefully…

  60. As I read this, all I could think about were the socks that I’m sick to death of. Socks, vs 59000 stitches (on the boarder mind you!). I think that kind of tells anyone the difference in attention span.
    AYE, the blanket is beautiful, Beautiful, BEAUTIFUL!
    Jen will be so proud!

  61. My birthday is in August. My brothers’ are in July and September. We were all three born in Alabama in the 1950s. That was before air conditioning in case you don’t know. I guarantee my poor mother would totally sympathize with Jen on this one.

  62. Sometimes it’s nice to hear about other delusional knitters. The blanket is absolutely beautiful (as are all your projects). And of course you’re not complaining. Since this is only my 3rd ever comment to you I can’t say “Well, I guess I’ll get back to the socks I just cast on”. I’ll save that for another day. Happy knitting!!!

  63. I would likely have had more babies if anyone had ever knit me anything as beautiful as that!! What a lucky friend and baby!! Gorgeous blanket!!

  64. You are making an heirloom; a treasure for the baby; even if it is a gazillion stitches to finish. A handcrafted heirloom.

  65. Running as fast as her full uterus would let her – hysterical! Surely a turn of phrase I shall always remember and laugh over.
    Too too funny Steph!

  66. Perhaps the reason it is so big is because you were subconsciously thinking it might need to cover twins. . .but I think Jen might be happier if your subconsious misread “twin-sized bed” somewhere. After all, you’re affecting the delivery date already. Maybe you could affect the number to be deliverd as well!

  67. I am sure that your writing was very interesting today, and I will have to re-visit it once I get over being COMPLETELY DISTRACTED by the gorgeousness of that blanket. Holy Cow! It’s inspirational.

  68. You seem to have an ironical propensity for knitting really large blankets in the summer. Had you forgotten the agony of the wedding blanket of 2009? I knit a baby sized version and that was enough for me. Your newest blanket project is delightfully lovely and no mother or her baby will be able to resist it. Knit on!!!!

  69. how about thinking your done with a mega blanket starting the edging… only to realize you are a good 5 inches short from goal… yeah, that’s me. it sucks!
    it’s going to look beautiful… 🙂

  70. arghghg, I was born in August. I have thought of that one every few years. Blanket is stunning and the socks will seem teeeeeny-tiny in comparison.

  71. If Pregnant-in-August Jen would like some perspective, my co-worker is due in 3 weeks and thanks to today’s earthquake, had to waddle outside in Virginia’s heat & humidity because we had to be evacuated until maintenance men could confirm there was no damage to our building.
    I carried her laptop for her, but we still had to go about .75 miles, mill about for 10 minutes, and then go back.
    I thought she’d go into labor right then and there just from the excitement of it all!

  72. That was a good check on perspective! You don’t want Jen to wrap up her little bundle in the fall in this truly beautiful blanket and think how you hated every stitch on the last half.

  73. When I was 3 weeks late in July 28 years ago, I realized that just maybe I’d be pregnant forever. She was born the next day. So, you’ve got only four hours of forever knitting. Maybe both will be done in the morning.

  74. I would absolutely feel Jen’s pain. I’m only a day over due in August and I’m going crazy 🙂 It seems like the nine months have flown right by and the last few weeks have just crawled. I was working on a blanket for my baby and worried it wouldn’t be done. Lets just say the blanket was done long before the baby 😀 I’m sure that Jen is appreciative of your understanding of her being pregnant in August. Keep going and I’m sure that the blanket won’t take that much longer and for Jen’s sake either will the baby 😀

  75. Best wishes that you get a good fours hours of knitting today and that Jen’s baby comes soon and healthy!

  76. Right, but wow, what a beautiful blanket. And yes, I too have been nine months pregnant in August.

  77. It could be worse…Jen could be preggers with twins OR triplets, then where would you be? Suck it up and knit on so that poor girl can deliver that baby.

  78. Very glad that small voice in your head reminded you of why you’re working on the endless edging as quickly as possible. Can’t wait to see both finished works.

  79. Remember the other day when I asked if you were going to post the pattern? forget that. When you starting doing the math on how long it would take YOU to finish, I can confirm that, as a slow knitter, I probably would not finish in my lifetime. I’m not only slow, I’m older than you.

  80. yes but Step.. you gotta admit, it is absolutely gorgeous, and it will be an heirloom, made by a famous 21st century fiber artist and author. whatta gift!! lucky baby….
    (suck it up girl, be proud!!)

  81. Twenty nine years ago, I was preggers in August. And I know better than to count my stitches. Very counter-productive, Young Lady Harlot! And white? You ARE asking for it! lol

  82. Steph, say it with me… I think I can, I think I can, I think I can! (Lmbo)
    Jen, may you be blessed with a fast delivery and a healthly baby. 🙂

  83. And any of us who had ever been pregnant in weather above about 70F would be cheering her on. I was born in early Sept &, ever since the temp got into the early 80’s in late February the year I was pregnant with my younger girl, I felt guilty for the discomfort my mom must have felt in the last few weeks before my birth (esp since she traveled to San Antonio Tx when she was 7 1/2 months along so she could be with my father when I was born.)

  84. I love, love this post! And Rams–spot on. One only teases people one feels totally at ease with and well loved by. (Hey, Rams, just make sure it’s *baby* alpaca in those tripwires, okay?)
    That blanket is exquisite, and the baby will be too, just wait till you get to see the little one all wrapped up in it.

  85. OH FOR GOODNESS SAKES! I feel so bad for Jen. I think you should find it in your heart to just sit down and finish it no matter what you have to sacrifice. After all; she can’t have the baby until YOU finish knitting the blanket. And August is hot; and she is tired; and if she is not a knitter, she has no clue why you cant just hurry up and get it done.
    Have a heart, put your life on hold for a half a day and finish it so that poor women can have her baby!

  86. Woah. It sounds like Jen has started to believe that maybe you do in fact have power over babies arriving?
    You know, maybe from now on you should knit smaller things for babies. Maybe booties? That way you won’t have to worry about enraged mothers-to-be.

  87. Lovely blanket. Love the image of a super pregnant and irate woman chasing you with needles and yarn flying around your yard. Add a super soaker and it sounds like fun.
    The good news from the looks of the blanket is the baby won’t have outgrown it by the time it’s done. So relax! What probably makes it feel like a drudge is that you’re under a deadline that appears to be imminent.

  88. I was wondering about the state of that baby to be! Knit woman, Knit! When the blankie is done, labor will be begun. Is Jen’s bag packed? Knit on.

  89. Could it be you are not tired of the knitting but of waiting for the baby to arrive? Just asking. So you are knitting one stitch a second, that is great. I am all with the one about tatting the blanket, I was thinking of 59.000 confetti cross-stitches for the border, you would never be able to do one a second, because you would have to read every stitch from the sheet before doing the two halves that make one crossstitch. And Jen, go for it, wishing both of you and the YH a happy ending to this simultaneous baby-effort.

  90. it is a beautiful blanket, Stephanie, and you are doing a great job: look at it!knit on, it’s great

  91. Oh, my. oh my oh my oh my.
    First off: Never, Ever, Ever stop and count total stitches. That is the definition of demoralizing. I learned that from cross stitch (and I see a couple others said something similar.)
    Second off: Jen would be totally, absolutely within her rights. But she wouldn’t do it. She would, however, practice her best Mommy raised-eyebrow glare while she made you knit.

  92. Well done, Steph, the blanket is gorgeous and you made the right mental adjustment, apparently without the help of a beer. Now just take a deep breath, and then another . . .
    One of my relatives is also pregnant in August, due in Sept. I knitted a baby blanket that started with 8 sts and ended with about 450 sts per round. I was getting close to the deadline (baby shower) and thought, I’ll just add three more rounds to show the pattern better. I’ll have plenty of time to bind off on the day of the shower. Then I realized that it was an i-cord bind-off (new to me) and was taking three times as long as I expected.
    I finally put the blanket into the gift bag and went to the shower. I asked the guest of honor to open my gift among the first, and told her she would laugh and understand why. When she held up the blanket, still on the needles, everyone laughed. I announced that it was a family tradition to receive knitted gifts from me still on the needles. Then I sat down and finished it at the shower. What a lark.
    And now, like one of the other commenters, I’m kntting another baby blanket, this time for my second grandchild. Hurray for babies and their blankets!

  93. That is one huge baby blanket – which makes it all the more likely that this will be the blanket on the (grown-up) baby’s bed at uni, and they’ll snuggle under it in their first home, and wrap their baby in it…. It’s so worth it, keep going!

  94. It may be huge and taking forever, Stephanie; but what a thing of beauty it is! I am looking forward to seeing the finished pix. I regret that I won’t be able to see it “up close and personal”.

  95. That blanket it just awesome!!! Would love to have the pattern so maybe i could make one for my future baby. 🙂 Keep up the great work, your an awesome friend and i’m sure she’s going to love it!!!!

  96. My first grandchild is due the beginning of December and I have been putting off knitting a baby blanket until it gets cooler. I think I better get started!!

  97. Have no fear….we won’t tell Jen. >:-) It will be our little secret just between us. You’re right though – she would have seriously come over there and whacked you one. Not a court in the world would convict her either.

  98. The road to you-know-where is paved with good intentions. Have you lately checked out the size of a newborn? Of a one-year-old? Never mind that size XL seems to be becoming the norm for adults and children – you do NOT have to knit a baby blanket big enough for their (probably) eventual marriage bed. Other than that, the blanket is gorgeous, but remind them if they use it for a christening to keep it from dragging on the floor or dipping into the font.

  99. Well, I still think you hold more power over my biological clock in your mind than you do in reality – otherwise we’d both be done.
    While it is a beautiful piece, like every project in the world, the last stretch of the end game is the part of any project that most resembles a Hitchcock movie. Mostly his suspense movies.

  100. August is not turning into quite the month you thought, huh?
    Take that picture of Jen you posted, put it in a little plastic baggie…and pin it to the side of the blanket you are working on, as a kind of reminder of “the other side”.
    Then find your zen spot to knit in…and tackle the knitting!
    But it makes for very entertaining reading!!! (sorry Jen…but we will all celebrate your baby’s arrival, trust me!).

  101. It’s a gorgeous blanket. Cannot wait to see the finished product. The border is alway the toughest part. All that ‘picking up’ and fiddly stuff, but totally worth the work.
    Jen will be fine and the blanket will be much appreciated.

  102. Oh. *So* pretty. Edging is one of those things I just haven’t got around to trying yet, but I think I’m going to have to. Even if it does take a while.
    You will be completely thrilled with it when you’re done, and so will Jen. Knit on!

  103. That’s the (black) magic of knitting edging. The delusion comes from thinking, “Oh, it’s only 8 stitches (or 12 or 15) wide. Easy, peasy.” But it’s a journey into oblivion. Until you finish, that is. Then it’s all worth it. Of course, it may take a few days for the “all worth it” to sink in. I know. I just went through the same thing with a knitted doily and roughly the same number of stitches to knit off as you have.

  104. I’m so glad you were able to put that into perspective before Jen had to scream at you and beat you up. Keep knitting, and never underestimate the power of coffee.

  105. Oh my goodness! What a lot of stitches. I can’t even wrap my head around that. Surely it will be a beautiful heirloom when you’ve finished.

  106. This is a gorgeous and lovely gift, and it’s ok that you are a little tired of it….I know you really love Jen and it’ll be FINE. Can you tell me , or can SOMEONE tell me what pattern this is for this lovely baby blanket?
    Email me? kbruce57atgmaildotcom.
    Thanks. Kathleen

  107. Oh yeah, the portion of the project where you look at it and wonder “why aren’t you finished yet???”
    Both for the blanket and the baby!

  108. I’m so glad it’s not just me who can’t get the “knitting time over optimism” equation right! I’m housesitting for a friend, and had the intention of knitting a bolero cardi for my Mum’s giftmas pressie while I’m there. I “moved in” on Monday and so far have about an inch of the back done!
    And on the subject of not moaning – if you can get BBC programmes on the internet, look for a programme called “Harry’s Heroes”, with Prince Harry and young HM Forces men who have received horrific injuries walking to the North Pole. Sheesh, I couldn’t do that with all my arms and legs, much less with one or more missing!!

  109. gosh that edging is lovely. i can’t remember, did you make it up? or get it from some book?
    is this pattern something we can harass you into publishing? cuz you know i will harass you.

  110. I can’t wait to see the finished product, but for now I’m enjoying the image of Pregnant Jen racing (waddling) after you with a handful of DPNs to fling. Te-he-he!!

  111. Stephanie – Let me just say that this is most beautiful form of love that a friend could possibly give a new mom (expect maybe being on hand for night feeds.) This isn’t a blanket, it’s an heirloom – truly, truly one of the most beautiful blankets I’ve seen. And your friend knows the time you’ve put into it and she’ll love it all the more because she knows. You are a good friend.
    Peace and joy….

  112. I’m chuckling because, while reading your post, I had the same thought as you: Can you imagine how ready Jen is to get her project (baby) finished, compared to how ready you are to get your project (baby blanket) finished? I read on, and my thoughts were just a little more toned-down than yours, lol!
    Mary G. in Texas

  113. A larger blanket is a blessing. It will have a longer life than the rest becuase it will work for a toddler as well as a newborn… It is truly a beautiful pice. My daughter’s favorites are the ones she, as a toddler, can still wrap up in completely, that fit on our laps when we sit together or beside each other. Gorgeous!!!

  114. And to think there are people out there who thinking knitting, and by extension knitters, are boring!!! You have the most wonderful sense of humor and the ability to make one feel and see exactly what you are describing. I was cracking up at the mental picture of a very pregnant woman gone wild, chunking items and screaming.
    Absolutely gorgeous blanket and the hundreds of thousands of stitches that have gone into it will be worth it when you see Jen’s little bundle wrapped all nice and snuggly within it!!

  115. Certainly you’re not testing the fates, merely expressing the frustration of anxiously awaiting the new arrival… the blanket is absolutely gorgeous and will be cherished for a lifetime.
    Jen, health, happiness and blessings to you both. Rams – just tell me where and when!!!

  116. Not to mention that this is THE most gorgeous baby blanket in the entire universe!!!

  117. You are probably too close to the grind of the effort to see it clearly but…it’s beautiful.
    Speaking as someone who is also pregnant, I would probably sympathise with Jen if she felt tempted to hurl things at you. I’m 8.5 weeks away from my due date but things are already uncomfortable.
    Come October, I think that I would be next to murderously hysterical if there was even a remote chance that Spud’s exit was being held up by a blanket edging. Trust me – finish it quickly!

  118. What a lovely work of art. While you are knitting think of the baby’s great grand children using this wonderful gift. Good health and happiness to you and Jen.

  119. A true heirloom. Gorgeous. But a part of me is wondering what comes next, as always. Can’t wait to read your new book as well. 😀

  120. You’re making a super beautiful thing. Like each of your daughters. But you will not have to deal with cleaning up after it or behavior when it’s a teenager. Like Jen will with her “long-term” project.
    Look at how much CLOSER you are to the end now than you were a month ago!

  121. Stephanie
    The blanket looks beautiful and big enough already. Now cast off and give it to your friend so she can have that baby.

  122. So, you have to know, I’ve been reading Raffaella Barker’s “Hens Dancing” lately, and if you haven’t read it, you should track down a copy (after, naturally, you’ve finished the blanket). The voice reminds me very much of yours, and if only the protagonist knitted, I think you’d be fast friends (you could probably teach her. That is, if she weren’t a fictional character).
    Hope the blanket moves quickly! It looks lovely 🙂

  123. Whenever I am in the spot you are, I do like you do with the pages you have to write. I pick my desired end date, determine how many rows are left, and divide it all up into manageable increments; Per day or per hour or whatever works for you. Then I make sure to step back and ask “is this unreasonable?” If the answer is “no” I start my knitting. As long as I’ve done my “homework” for the day, then I’m allowed to work on anything else I please 🙂

  124. That blanket is so beautiful, I would pay for the pattern even if I never conquer a project so big. I hope you’re planning on writing it down!

  125. Ok … um … *guffaw* … I just want to remind you, which may get you running after ME (and I am *quite* sure that you will have no trouble catching me, whatsoever) that when you first told us about this blanket, you did mention that it would be ‘epic’.
    Turns out you weren’t lyin’. Or kidding. Even just a little. It’s EPIC. And beautiful.
    Please excuse me now, as I have to go back and lie on the floor at the image of Jen and her uterus chasing you around, throwing things…..ROFLMAO!!!!

  126. I realize that it _is_ a lot of knitting, but I can also tell you it is waaaay more ambitious than any gift to moms-to-be than most, and (what is most important) it is very, very pretty.
    Good luck–it’s a beauty.

  127. As the mother of babies born in July, August, I am so glad you thought better of your initial post, but on the other side I to am knitting a baby blanket that for whatever reason is not moving well I messed up the math on it and now I cannot seem to knit more than about 10 to 15 rows without making a mistake an while I have eliminated my usual distractions to help stop the mistakes they are still cropping up and it is only because I can’t seem to count to 8 so I have begun thinking that maybe since my little ones turned 16, & 21 respectively my brain is turning to muss due to their birthdays. I cannot work on another project because then this one will end up at the bottom of the WIP pile and the mother who requested this will beat me senseless. Back to work NOW!!

  128. That blanket is GORGEOUS!!!! It looks like it will be worth every stitch that you have knit to make it!!!!!
    Another beautiful project that will be so appreciated by the beautiful baby and mom that receives it!!!

  129. Went back to read that a second time. Still hilarious.
    Great with child in August is about as miserable as it gets. I have walked that walk. Or rather I waddled that waddle, many years ago.
    Still. Laugh out loud funny.

  130. The blanket is so so beautiful. I like to think that like the pregnancy and delivery the, ahem, discomfort of the knitting is forgotten with the passage of time. Oh, by the way, don’t bike in wet weather when there is lightning, please.

  131. Teehee, I keep wondering how you will manage to knit in August when the menopause monster hits. Hot flashes and knitting do not go well together. I’m looking forward to a whole chapter in a future book addressing the situation.

  132. Good Morning – Being aware that I am totally computer illiterate, I am however trying desperately to find the pattern for your adorable “widdle shoosies”. Any and all help will be so appreciated…….

  133. Stephanie, what a gorgeous blanket. I’m really a quilter who loves reading your work. In quilting one quickly learns (it’s grade school math) that there is more square footage in borders than in the center of a rectangle. Draw your blanket, draw lines making a rectangle/square for the center and rectangles for the borders & figure the areas, adding up the area of the borders versus area of center & you’ll see what I mean. We’re fooled because the borders are relatively narrow. Sadly, as much as we dream, the math always works out this way! Love to you & family. S.

  134. Beautiful blanket. Babies are easier to care for in utero – even in August. Still, empathy to Jen if she has to wait much longer.

  135. It is a beautiful thing, and it will no doubt be ready when the beautiful baby needs to be kept warm in it. Knit on!
    I have a knitting pattern book (Knitting with a Smile, I think it is called) where the author has supplied the number of stitches in each garment at the beginning of the pattern. I know some people like to keep track of how many miles of yarn they use, but I think counting stitches is a little insane.
    Then again, there was a really cool book a while back with nothing but 1 million dots in it, with various strategic numbers labeled – just so kids could get an idea what a million was like. So your blanket can also be a teaching tool…

  136. I feel your pain, as I recently cast off a center out baby blanket with what I thought would be a simple garter stitch edging that ended up being over 25,000 stitches when I finally did the math after knitting interminably. Your edge is much fancier. I also can feel Jen’s pain, as I had one child in September and the next in July. Keep knitting!

  137. The blanket is beautiful. I am not nearly the knitter your are, but there has to be something wrong with the math. There is no way that blanket could be knit in 16 hours. I’d guess about 10 times that. I’m sure Jen will love it when it’s done.

  138. You have control over when the blankie is finished (subject to other commitments). Jen has no control over the baby.

  139. I’m a Mother of 2 children born in August – one in Hawaii and one in Iowa. I feel her pain.

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