I have an inner knitter. I’m sure you do to. It’s the part of every knitter that has a pure and unreasonable love for knitting and yarn, but, unlike the rest of you, lacks any sort of maturity when it comes to getting what it wants. My outer knitter is what shows after personality traits like patience, self-control and reason slap down the inner knitter’s impulsive wants and desires, although I only try to control her when I need to.
If my inner knitter wants to cast on another pair of socks and there are already four pairs on needles? I don’t stop her. What does it matter? It’s only knitting. It’s supposed to be fun, and I can cast on as many pairs as we want. This assumes of course that I’m not on a knitting deadline – in which case I’m probably going to end up talking with my inner knitter about commitment and responsibility. If my inner knitter wants to buy a skein of yarn, and there’s room in the stash and her plan is good, we buy it. If my inner knitter wants me to bail on cleaning the bathroom and knit instead, we might do that. I only have to wrestle her to the ground and hold her there by the metaphoric throat when she wants to buy eight skeins of cashmere or take a week off work or tells me to screw off when I suggest we might want to get off the couch and get a little exercise. (My inner knitter likes knitting, TV and chips. We discuss this often.)
This brings me to something interesting I’ve noticed about my inner knitter. We’ve had a few weeks of relative silence. This is totally normal for us. It’s not like she doesn’t want me to knit, she’s just laid back about what. It’s probably because my inner knitter is about 14, and like many teenagers, has her periods of intensity punctuated by periods of complete apathy. I’m walking around saying "What would you like to knit?" and she’s lying on her bed wearing black clothes and too much eyeliner and listening to Fall Out Boy really loud, and whenever I check in with her she just says "Whatever. Why are you always talking to me? Close the door… Wait, do I get the stash when you die?"
At that point I just wander off, acknowledge that while we still love and must knit, my inner knitter doesn’t have an agenda right now. I actually like these phases. They let me finish up projects that have been languishing, clean out the stash (you can’t do that except while your inner knitter is checked out. They don’t like getting rid of stuff) and catch up on spinning or weaving. It’s never permanent. When she’s done pouting because I made her clean her room and get off of Ravelry, she’s see something or want something or be on fire for a vest. No way to know. Usually, I just wait her out.
Today though I figured something out. Inner knitters want you unemployed. That must be what’s going on, because after about a week of lying on her bed wishing her bangs were longer and she had more black nail polish, my inner knitter has suddenly perked up. I have three writing deadlines that I’m thrilled and happy to be working on, and bingo. There’s our girl. She wants to surf patterns. She wants to rip up the stash. She thinks everything we’re knitting right now is crap and wants nothing but new stuff. Out of new yarn. I’ve explained that I have a lot of work to do, and it’s not working. The more interested I am in writing, the more interested she is in knitting. This morning, when I told her that there was no reasonable way that we were getting up from the desk before I had met my word count and written a blog entry, she screamed "I AM SO SICK OF YOUR STUPID JOB, YOU NEVER CARE WHAT I WANT."
I took a deep breath and reminded her that without a job, I can’t buy yarn, and I like buying yarn and that we are actually on the same side, and then I realized that I was arguing with the part of my brain that’s a teenager, and I quit.
Now I’m just sitting at my desk, trying to write, and my inner knitter is totally carrying on in a way that makes it really hard to work, but I’m pretending that I can’t hear her.
I’m a woman of some fortitude and I’m proud of what little self control I have, but dudes.
She’s loud.
I know this feeling all too well.
I’ll snap out of it eventually, too.
Our knitters must be hanging out together right now, because I hear the racket they’re making!
I love this blog. Inner knitters. Impish at times, but quite serene sometimes.
Love your blog. Thanks for making your word count today.
Ruby
My inner knitter keeps me from cleaning….a lot….heeheehee
Thank you!! You just explained EXACTLY what I’ve been feeling! 😀
Unfortunately, my inner knitter might be a 14 year old, but the rest of me is an uptight, demanding, absolute control freak. This isn’t working very well…
Hoping this post means you have let your inner knitter out of her room and you are happily ensconced on chesterfield watching Castle on DVD and knitting.
LOVED this entry! Explains quite a lot (and probably saved me a bunch of therapy money).
this is so FLIPPING brilliant– YOU are so flipping brilliant!!!
I’m already unemployed, so my inner knitter has won.
My only alternative…..try to make money teaching others to find their inner knitter.
(Do or do not…..there is no try)
You even make writer’s block sound like fun. Wait – writer’s block? What writer’s block?
My inner knitter is about five or six. She gets frustrated with new techniques and I have to constantly remind her how much fun it’ll be once we’ve mastered them. Like any little kid, she’s hyperactive and has a short attention span, and what she wants changes with the wind. She rarely if ever shuts up, asks a lot of weird questions (“Why do have to cast off at all? Wouldn’t it look cool to wear it with the needles still in? If they were aluminum ones we wouldn’t have to worry about washing it, and we could fix the yarn on with superglue so it would never fall out!”) and throws spectacular temper tantrums when she doesn’t get what she wants.
Unfortunately, I’m a starving college student. So stash money and time are both veeeeery limited resources. You can imagine what I’m living with as a result. I think maybe I spoil her too much, and if I were a little more disciplined we’d have less problems. *sigh*
At least your teen-aged inner knitter is loud. Mine is sneaky, sneaky, sneaky.
Did we just read the prologue for your next book?
Totally they want you unemployed. I find this with my knitting at work when I look up and realize that I am still knitting 10 minutes after my break/lunch/sanity time was supposed to end!
Send her to my house. I have a few unfinished projects she could start on. They’d be new to her! My inner knitter is bored with them. 😉 Maybe we can swap inner knitters?
really really love this post.
Same issue. Inner knitter wants to finish the swirl (Depth of Field) rather then sew bags for my etsy store. I decided I’d give into her till 12noon pst then get to the real work.
Who really can argue with her when I’m at the cuffs?
WHAAAAAT? I CAN’T HEAR YOU!!!……………..
staaaaaaaaaaaaay strong and resist the urge to give in… for a little while, at least! then kick off your shoes and run barefoot through the roving together! 🙂 see? it’s all in the balance! :]
So true. You’ve expressed in knitting terms (i.e., ones I can relate to) a phenomenon I’ve experienced all too often.
Oh, how I love this post!
And, trust me, I’m retired and my inner knitter still rules around in my brain — maybe even more so now that I’m not working for a living.
That is hysterically funny! Your IK is more punk than any of your daughters appear to be from the blog posts! I love this so much, and once again you have captured a truth for all of us! Love you!
I absolutely know this feeling. But sometimes my inner knitter is also a spinner, weaver or any other creative outlet she can find so that when I’m saying, “Well, really, the dishes are…” she interrupts with “BORING. Dishes are BORING. We need to learn backstrap weaving NOW! Or tatting. I wanted to learn tatting, right? Do we have tatting stuff?”
It’s a noisy brain, but I’m cool with it. ^_~
My inner knitter has me reading the Yarn Harlot’s blog when I should be working. Can we say codependency?
Do I have to come over there? (I’m up for the award of Meanest Mom Ever this year, and I am totally in the groove.)
Would it help you out if I cast on another pair of socks?
“Are you writing about me? I know you’re making fun of me on That Blog. Everybody is laughing at me and IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT!” *Inner Knitter bedroom door slams, shaking entire house*
Yes, I know this well. My inner child artist and I have this argument at the start of every painting session. She tries to win me over by showing me yarn instead of the paints and brushes.
I can relate though my inner knitter’s nails are not painted black.
perhaps it’s time for Dragon Dictate…I’m just sayin’
Hey, I AM unemployed right now, and although I’m fighting with my inner knitter to buy less yarn than she wants to, she’s thrilled with all the knitting time. So much getting done! It doesn’t pay for more yarn but hey, that’s what the stash is for.
Good luck with yours!
Ahhhh so it’s my inner knitter’s fault that I just tried convincing my other half that it’s ok for me to use the credit card to buy yarn now, instead of waiting for our tax refund.
I like it!
I’m currently caught in the middle of a fight between my inner knitter and my exhausted brain. My inner knitter’s all, like, “Wanna make a sweater!!” and my brain’s going, “Dude, we’re in the middle of lambing and I haven’t gotten enough sleep in…I have no idea, actually, when I last got decent sleep. How about a nice lace shawl? A pretty shawl, where there are no shaping instructions or math or anything like that. Just line after line of chart. Nice and simple. Wouldn’t you like that?” And then my inner knitter goes, “Ooooo, pretty shawls….let’s make four or five! And a sweater!!” God only knows what’s going to happen next week, when I’m taking off from my day job to stay home and monitor lambing. You may need to pray for me.
Well – this made me laugh outloud because I took the day off sick from work (a little asthma and pollen issue) BUT I really needed it to work on my homework (working on my Master’s) but I am HERE reading your blog because….. well…. because….my evil twin Skippy decided I needed to go to my favorite sites 🙂
Love this post. Love your blog, BTW, I’ve been reading it for months now and this is my first comment!
My inner knitter wants to knit SOCKS! NOW! She doesn’t care that not only do I not own sock-size DPNs (I’m a disgrace!), I can’t go buy them for myself because I already put them on my birthday list! Just a few weeks to wait . . . and I’m hoping really hard for some sock yarn as well.
Inner knitter has now at least generated blog entry. You have to get past word count on writing assignment…
Would it work to expand on inner knitter persona? What does she prefer on Ravelry? Does she prefer indie dyers?
Or is this a serious article with “quoted” sources?
I. Totally. Get. This.
My InnerKnitter, is having a two year old’s tantrum, screaming and crying that I’m in my office working on some database testing and data models when she wants to finish HappySock #2.
HappySock #2 is past the heel and heading up the leg – there’s not far to go. InnerKnitter wants to finish her, but we all know that I need to work in order to afford more pretty yarn, and food for the dinner table.
I’ve even tried to bribe InnerKnitter with chocolate or a trip to the yarn store later, but she’s not having any of that. Usually I can reason with her – she’s occasionally rational – but not today. Today she is two years old and on a big I WANT I WANT I WANT streak.
Wow. My inner knitter hates exercising too! No exercising. Only sitting on bums knitting. All. The. Time. I try to explain that when you only do that there is a teeny bit of potential that you end up on news reports being a severely overweight hoarder, but she doesn’t care about all that. We can worry about that later she says.
It’s a constant battle.
I have an inner knitter as well. She’s screaming that I don’t care about her and my outer knitter is retorting with “We homeschool the kids. They must have an education.”
But then Inner Knitter says, “But if we send them to school we will have more time to knit.”
And then I tell her that it would border on pathetic if I sent away my kids just so I would have more time to knit. They’re only young once, we like to have fun with homeschooling and someday there will be grandbabies…at a time when we are not paying to feed little mouths and settle debts with the pediatrician, pediatric opthamologist, and pediatric dentist. Stick it out Inner Knitter, your day in the sun will come. Must more expendable income and far more time. Wait for it.
The talk isn’t working so well today, which explains why I’m commenting on the Yarn Harlot’s blog smack dab in the middle of the school day.
Love this blog entry. Inner knitter wants and desires…
Mine isn’t a teenager, she’s more like my mother’s evil twin. She knows best, nags a lot and never tires of saying “I told you so”. I can’t see her (listening to the voices is enough) but I swear I know when she’s pursing her lips.
Swap you?
BINGO I don’t need a shrink, you just solved me. OHIP thanks you.
Thought you might get a kick out of the Knitting Princess…it relates to today’s blog. Enjoy!
ww.knitprincess.com/?p=36
http://whttp://www.knitprincess.com/?p=43
And others?..just press “next”. They are hilarious.
Thanks,
Rose
I so love this BLOG, you are always inside my head. My IK is happy that I’m finishing my UFOs this year so next year we can start everything that is not yet a WIP. She has been very patient and I will reward her soon. She knows that my pet care jobs will be paid in gift certificates to my LYS. Whoopie!
THAT explains everything… I thought I was hearing voices, now I understand…
I totally agree with this post. The inner knitter is sitting inside, drooling over magazines and catalogs, wishing she had this yarn or that pattern or that she didn’t have to clean the house.
Holy cow am I glad I’m not the only one who feels like that sometimes…because yeah. Today my inner knitter was kicking and screaming when I got up early to go into lab, and insisted that it would have been totally acceptable to sleep in late, finish spinning a pretty sparkly batt, and spend the rest of the afternoon weaving a new scarf…
Virtual chocolate and good thoughts going your way re: the deadlines.
I think your inner knitter and my inner knitter might be twins separated at birth, mine *really* perked up at the unemployed comment – “see how much knitting we would get time for…” and the exercise thing – oh my yes!
This. A thousand times THIS. Except not only does my inner knitter want me unemployed, I have a clever Australian Shepherd who also fails to see the point of me working everyday, and snuggles with me extra warmly on work days. It’s two against one, and I don’t know how long I can last…
Have you considered sending her off to summer camp for a few weeks? 🙂
Mine always overdoes the New Year’s celebrations, so I have at least part of January to finish off WIPs (I ended 2011 with 12 WIPs I didn’t have in 2010 (on top of what already existed in 2010, some of which date to the early 1990’s)). This year I finished half of them (plus a few new projects done start to finish) before my inner knitter got assertive.
She cast on 5 projects that are in various WIP stages scattered all over the house (teens never seem to pick up after themselves), has bought several more (okay, more than several), and is threatening to start yet another project today.
I’m certain that the reason she has been so particularly difficult lately is that my husband and I are temporary empty nesters (the real 16 year old returns Saturday night from a school trip) and she wants to make sure I don’t take advantage of all this “adult” time to actually accomplish something.
If you figure out how to control such an unreasonable creature, please let me know.
My inner knitter wars with my day job of piano teacher. I can pretty much promise that it is impossible to knit and play the piano at the same time.
My inner knitter is exactly like yours. She occasionally shares a few values with me. We finished a deadline knit even when there were cooler, more fun patterns and yarns. Now I’m on work deadline and well, she’s a bit cranky about that.
Threaten to send IK to go live with Grandma. That always works for me.
Tears of laughter here. I love the description of your inner knitter. I’m going to have to get in touch with mine and see what she looks like.
Cast on new socks last week. Knit 3 dishies over the weekend. Cast on a new cowl last night. Today she wants more new socks (sock #2 from the last week pr doesn’t count) I hear you – just.
Are you sure your inner knitter hasn’t been talking to my inner baker? I think they may be friends. And both of them are conspiring to get me to the cookbook and knitting book section of the library, instead of the “finishing the publishing project” section, wherever that is. http://bronwenreads.wordpress.com
My inner knitter thinks I’m a bitch…now I know why. Thanks for clarifiying all this for me!
I have a fourteen year old daughter and this post made me spit coffee all over the computer screen. Holy crap, do you have a spycam in my house or something? This part in particular: “she’s lying on her bed wearing black clothes and too much eyeliner and listening to Fall Out Boy really loud, and whenever I check in with her she just says ‘Whatever. Why are you always talking to me? Close the door.'” So. My. Kid. Also the thing about black nail polish.
I also get the inner knitter wreaking havoc and acting like a teenager. Mine only wants to spin right now. But I have knitting that must get done, and a real job, and housework and stuff.
You’re right. Even when the teenagers outside have grown up, there’s still that eternal one inside. Still, what would we do without her?
this is actually a really helpful metaphor for me! i recently went through a period that felt kind of like being bored with knitting, though i would never actually stop knitting, and i was a little worried. but now i understand that my inner knitter was just pouting and painting her nails, and i did in fact manage to make some useful progress on previously-abandoned projects etc while she did so!
I love your ability to explain your Inner Knitter
I’m pretty sure that my inner knitter is a bit…neurotic. She seems to think I can knit a whole lot in a short amount of time, all while watching a toddler (Little Man), taking care of Husband and said toddler, cleaning the house, taking care of the house, and trying to find a job…those “normal” things.
She likes to throw selfish tantrums when I calmly try to explain to her that yes, I do need to clean in my office…so we can have a safer place to knit (i.e., so the aforementioned toddler doesn’t get into my WIPs)…or when I tell her that bills need to be paid so we have light to knit by at 11pm…or when I tell her that there are other things that need to be done first.
She’s been having a very long, loud, nonsensical tantrum lately that I think may have stemmed from my monetary inability to purchase more yarn for a baby blanket and, instead, was forced to find a contrast color in an acrylic blend that doesn’t feel as nice as the original yarn. From that, she’s tried to force me to start three new projects (one of which was started last night), add several dozens of patterns to my queue (that I’ll probably never get through), read blogs about knitting, surf Pinterest, and almost ignore my bills (I wound up paying at least one late).
I have enough going on without her neurotic tantrums.
::sigh::
Chocolate and liquor help.
Thank heavens someone else is battling with their inner knitter. Mine is on a stash busting tear. Not to clean up any space mind you, but merely to justify buying more yarn. The baby blanket pattern I just queued up just might do the trick!
This is fantastic! I always feel a little less crazy when I read your blog – or at least in good company.
Yes, she might be loud, but she gave you a classic column!!!! LOVED LOVED LOVED this entry….and, yes, I have this litttle voice too…. thanks for the wonderful writing….
Wow. So that’s what’s going on with me. I wondered. Last week, when I still had a job, all I wanted to do was quit the job and knit the sweater I have on the needles, prep and spin the 5 alpaca fleeces that are in the garage, and knit a baby blanket. This week, when I no longer have a job (a job of such soul sucking suckiness that I am perfectly happy to have given it to someone else, by the way), all I want to do is sleep.
I think my IK took herself off to a Marilyn Manson concert or something then hooked up with some friends to go hang out in a deserted tenement building to sniff silk. If she doesn’t check in pretty soon, I swear I’m calling the knitting police.
Huh! So that’s what’s been going on with me..I’ve been keeping my inner knitter too much in check. I went knitting last night with my niece and she kept hauling out all these pretty socks and cowls which she was working on and I started thinking that my knitting wasn’t fun right now. Certainly not as much fun as she’s having. And it’s like you say: what difference does it make if I have 5 pairs of socks on the needles? I certainly have enough sock needles and yarn in this house to cast on far more than that, and I have no deadline projects. Thank you for the light-bulb-going-on moment. I think I’ll go cast-on something pretty 😉
Boy. Does *that* ever explain things…. Thanks much, as always!
S.F. Bay Area
My inner knitter isn’t nearly so useful as yours. Right now there is no desire to knit anything. I’ve been blaming being sick, but it has been going on for a couple weeks more than that. It feels so unnatural, because I was going great guns and now I’m on a scarf that is taking me at least 2 months. 😛
You are so adorable!
I’m not sure if I have an inner knitter. But if I do, I hope she is a goth teenager. I think I will have to start paying attention more and see if anyone is talking to me in there.
I fear my inner knitter is the sane one, though. The one that actually stops me from buying things I don’t really “need” and makes me plug away at justonemorerow on the boring project before I pick up the fun one. My inner knitter might be my crazy Aunt Barbara. Perhaps that’s why I don’t pay attention to her…?
Ah ha! This explains the relative reduction in knitting posts of late (not that the spinning and weaving posts weren’t great and inspiring – but I noticed).
@Kristine at 1:47, no one has only one set of sock-size needles or sock-size needles in only one form, i.e. DPNs + 2 circs + Magic Loop. See? Three pairs of socks OTN at once. Minimum.
But you got the blog post done, so now all you need to do is reach your word count and you’re done for the day! See- she actually helped you (even though she didn’t realize it at the time) by giving you a topic for the blog post. Give her a little kiss of the head (since she obviously needs some attention) and maybe she’ll be so freaked out she’ll leave you alone to finish your work.
Man! I have an inner knitter (and, um inner spinner, too!) who is JUST LIKE YOURS, Steph! She talks me out of doing any housework A LOT, and I let her, because I live alone, and who the heck cares if there are dust bunnies all over the bathroom? My dog doesn’t care. And I can always use the other bathroom, right?!
But dude, I have a friend coming to visit in late May, and I started cleaning my house two weeks ago….because it is going to take that long. I think my inner knitter may need some therapy….. :-/
If only someone would pay me to read, knit and drink (the occasional) beer.
My inner knitter and yours, I bet they text message back and forth about how absolutely idiotic and annoying we are. Mine clocked into “whateverrrr” mode last November and stay there ’til about February sometime. She’s actually pretty reasonable right now. I wonder what she wants. Oh wait. she’s happy because I bought that loom she wanted.
I love how you and your inner knitter think! Thank goodness you didn’t listen to her and sat down to write this humorous blog post! LOL
I, for one, am happy that your IK has decided to get back into it. I find that mine sometimes takes a break when I am not sure I am following the directions correctly. So the project stays idle (for fear that I have screwed the whole thing up and must frog to the cast ons) and so do I – which might explain why you have been spinning and weaving so much lately. Glad to hear IK is awakening and inspiring you to begin new knitting projects – as beautiful as your handspun is and woven scarves are, I really get inspired by the beautiful fabric you create with knits and purls. Welcome back, YH’s IK. I missed you.
Oh dear god. My daughter is your inner knitter and I never knew!
I can hardly wait to see what she’s wanting to knit.
I’m going to be guffawing all day! I want to preserve this blog post in acid-free paper, hung on the wall just so, to show all the muggles what it’s really like to be a knitter.
While trying not to look at some particularly nice yarn online that’s almost sold out.
I bet your inner knitter knows mine. They sound a lot alike 🙂
My inner knitter keeps wanting me to cast on sweaters that she knows won’t fit or flatter me at my current weight. She’s kind of mean.
My inner knitter read in Oprah that as we age we learn to go with the flow because we are always led in the direction we’re meant to go. This was not good for my outer knitter’s credit card…
So what you are saying is that you will never get rid of the teenager in your house?
I never knew she was called Inner Knitter. I just knew that when I was on the timeclock and trying to create a spreadsheet with formulas, something was always nudging me to google Ravelry or check the Yarn Harlot’s blog or see what online yarn stores had on sale this week. Thanks for putting a name to my problem. Perhaps now that I know her name, I can control her. Or not.
This explains why yesterday evening I was contentedly working along on several lovely WIPs, determined to finish them this month, yet today as I was tearing through all the stuff on my desk with a level of efficiency not seen for weeks…I cast on two new things. At least now I know who to blame!
I understand completely ~ my inner knitter is almost always in complete control of my outer knitter; and right now she is completely bored with the projects I’m working on and screaming hysterically at me all the time ~ I’m trying to ignore her because I really need to finish up some things I’ve started, but I don’t know how long I can ignore her before I give in and cast on something new.
Not sure what I loved most today – the post or the comments! Still laughing.
The competition is tough, but this may be your most brilliant blog.
Stephanie, I never knew, I never knew – ‘she’s lying on her bed wearing black clothes and too much eyeliner and listening to Fall Out Boy really loud’. I have never seen you in that light, more a “70s appliance colours” sort of woman, with no eyeliner. (I don’t even know who Fall Out Boy is, I will put it on my “To Do List” for the day), once the work stuff has been dealt with – that is when my IK really comes out.
I love that the IK concept could also be Interweave Knits.
My inner knitter can kick your inner knitters ass.
Love this post too!
You made me laugh today 🙂 Thanks.
I cleaned out some of the stash while my inner knitter was napping the other day, but when she woke up, she discovered that everything was just in the bottom of the charity box and hauled most of it back to the stash. But if she doesn’t stop muttering “my precious” and start making an actual plan for how it’s going to be used, it’s all going right back. (There, see? I told the Yarn Harlot what you’re doing. Now get it together, or else!)
My inner knitter must know your inner knitter…. she just demanded this, http://www.classiceliteyarns.com/WebLetter/238/Issue238.php and she wants it right now.
*heavy sigh*. Guess what I cast on last night?
I hear you! Yesterday I found out that the baby expected in the extended family is a girl. A Girl!!! The first girl in that generation. Something fluffy must be knit!!
Immediately I’m tossing the stash looking for pink (settled on coral) and something to go with it (no luck). Undeterred I cast on something nasty and unsuitable and knit away, completely ignoring Tara’s Easter sweater that still needs a sleeve (short) and button bands (long) and the weaving in of 11, 437 ends! Stupid inner knitter!
my inner knitter is stuck on noro scarf #13.
My Mother always told me she could not wait till I had children so she could see someone put me through the trouble I put her through.
I didnt have children.
If she knew about my inner knitter….she would be thrilled.
It’s funny, out of the two people you described, my Inner Knitter sounds more like you, which I guess makes me the “Inner Knitter” in this relationship. I’m always the one going “We need more yarn!” and “We need to cast on more socks!” and “But I don’t wanna knit that sweater, it’s taking foreverrrr!”
And my Inner Knitting is the one telling me “Take a peek in that tote bin; does it *look* like you need more yarn?” and “Seriously? More socks? Let’s count the number of pairs you’ve currently got going. Oh look, we have to use two hands.” and “It probably feels like you’ve been knitting it forever because you started it last March. I bet you’d finish faster if you did more than pull it out, whinge about how it’s taking forever, and then shove it back in the drawer without knitting a stitch.”
My Inner Knitter is kind of mean. And, like, totally boring. Now, where the heck is my black nail polish?
so that’s what that is!!!!! I got an inner knitter too!!!!
This explains everything. Everything. My inner knitter doesn’t want to knit, only because there is a deadline. So she wants to crochet, or cross-stitch, or nap…Most definitely a contrary teen living inside my head.
Thanks for braving the fight and getting this post written!
This is a classic. I’m printing it out and hanging it on my refrigerator. I haven’t laughed this much in days! Thank you!!!!!!!
I’m with Ruby.
“Inner knitters want you unemployed.”
Ohhhh yes. Ironically, when I was unemployed, all she did was listen to emo music and whine about how we had no money and no motivation, and I was too depressed to kick her in the butt. I think I finished 3 projects in the 10 months I was unemployed, and they were mostly little projects, not big ones.
Now that I’m back to work she’s decided that what I should actually be doing is designing knitting patterns. Sorry, hon, but we made $3 in pattern sales this month. At that rate it’ll be a long time before we can give up the day job. She frowns very seriously and tells me she understands, but I’m still sketching cables and outlining rough sock patterns on my notes during meetings just to get the basic idea out so I can focus on my job.
Definitely codependency. I only managed to keep away my inner knitter from reading all the comments to your post, by promising her, I’d allow her to comment if she’d let me finish my writing. Well. It worked. For this time.
Your writing is an absolute treasure. You’ve got me howling. If laughter does good like a medicine, you’re the prescription for today!
My IK knows me all too well. The minute I’m up to my deadline in Baby Blanket Boredom, she starts hauling out patterns – pretty hats, pretty socks, mitts, … They won’t take long, really they won’t. And you really are sick of the Blanket, you’ll make mistakes, you know you will…. The baby isn’t due for another month and you have at least 6 inches done (on a crib-size blanket) , there’s no rush!
Somebody please make her be quiet!
I love my inner knitter…….gives me someone to pin those unnecessary stash-enhancements on. ;o)
My inner Knitter & I reached an employment compromise…..I work at a yarn shop! Now, she just wails when we’ve knitted too many shop samples or those pesky customers want help. We’re still working on the whole responsibility thing.
One of your best blogs, ever!
My inner knitter keeps telling me – “You’ve got more yarn than you’ll EVER be able to knit.” “You’ve got more fiber than you’ll EVER be able to spin.” “You’ve got more WIP than you’ll EVER be able to finish.” My inner knitter is NO FUN AT ALL!
One of the funniest and real reflection of the inner knitter. Thanks!!!! Now off to try that blue nail polish that matches the yarn I just bought (and I rarely wear nail polish but…).
Thank you, Stephanie. For putting into words what is so hard to explain to non-fibery friends.
This is also an excellent example of why you are an accomplished, loved writer. And I only dream of becoming one.
My inner knitter rules! I think she is 34 and full of confidence and energy and she rarely lets up. I’m not sure there is an outer knitter, except for a total of maybe two weeks a year when Inner Knitter takes a brief vacation. She has never done her nails.
This blog entry should be an essay in your next book. Just as it is. Don’t mess with it at all. Just as it is.
Judging by recent activities involving casting on, queuing, yarn purchases and Ravelry surfing, my Inner Knitter is on a tear and winning hands down. (That would assume that the Outer Knitter – which would be me – is the responsible one. I’m not convinced.) Pretty sure I’ll be stopping to buy her some black nail polish on the way home.
Hmmm…am I still considered an enabler if the enable-ee is myself?
My IK got me through a Master’s Degree and a PhD… she insisted that if we knit through all the courses, we would do well — she was correct.
I love knitting, sitting on the couch and chips, my inner knitter always wins that battle!
LOVE this post!!!
My inner knitter keeps screaming at me to knit during professional meetings/courses. I wouldn’t DARE, but maybe once before I retire…….
“Why do I HAVE to swatch? Nobody else’s Inner Knitter has to swatch! Swatching is soooo stupid!!! You are just trying to ruin my life!” *slam*
‘Nuff said
Great post!!!
My inner knitter is more inventive than loud. When I want to do something, she’ll try to figure out how to do it with stash (whether appropriate or not) or how to dye and then spin the right yarn (despite the cost). Occasionally I actually win and get to buy that skein of Malabrigo… but not often.
My inner knitter is fabulous. And prolific. Sometimes I go into the cupboard to pull out the sweater she knit while I was working the paying job. —— Doh. Damn you inner knitter, can’t you make real things without me!
Presbytera, I’m sorry to tell you this, but I was awarded Worst Mother of the Year late last week. Sewed it up early this year.
I too have an inner knitter that only wanted to sit home and knit on the latest shawl project and, at the same mement, start another one. She did not want to get up, get into the car and go to work at 7 am this morning. I think you inner teenager and mine blog back and forth. It’s the only way she could say “see, I told you we should have stayed homez” “We could have had row 5 done by now..but NO” You just HAD to go to old boring job and not let me play”
I know that voice inside….I just know it!
My inner teenager was my OUTER teenage son until he finished high school and I decided it was my ex-husband’s turn for a while. So I actually, for the first time since I was – oh – 16, can do what I want, when I want, because I’m taking a year or so off, living with my dearest sweetheart, and recovering from all those years of working and parenting.
Everyone should get some time off to knit.
I’m sitting in a hospital bed recovering from knee replacement surgery today. I have my sock yarn scarf with me and did knit on it. Percocets and all. This past month I bought about 600$ worth of yarn. To add to my large stash “behind the couch” my inner knitter knows I’m out of work for 8 weeks and she just took over. I also traveled to Cambridge for two very chic balls of malabrigo sock and one pretty purplish zauberball. I accompanied my hubby on a business trip……..just to buy yarn.
I have some Tosh and Claudia hand painted. Berrocco Blackstone tweed. Pacapeds sock oh and some plymouth dk superwash merino. That’s what I can see from the edge of the couch. 8 glorious weeks. Inner knitter Pam is ecstatic!
As always your blog is loving read!
….my inner knitter now wants to know the names of all the other inner knitters on this blog. I SWEAR they all talk to each other. My iinner knitter’s name is Hysteria. She is about 5’4 and 100 pounds…or at least she thinks she is. She will follow a skein of wool and silk anywhere and there is not a yarn shop she will not sniff out.
She does have competiton though. There is a large brown spinning wheel that peaks her interest now and again and a different voice saying “Rhinebeck is coming”
Love this!! I’ve often thought that I have an ongoing battle between ‘the child’ and ‘the mother’, but your explanation is so much more amusing.
Sheer brilliance! This really explains so much of my life. I bet our inner knitters would be BFFs, sprawled on the bed talking on the phone, plotting all the cool indie-dyed yarn they’re gonna buy, talking about how cute Brooklyn Tweed and Stephen West are, and wondering if Kool-Aid dye would work on their Riot Grrl t-shirts. *waves at Hysteria*
I believe I’ll join Dina in hanging this on the fridge. 🙂
You totally crack me up.
This explains everything. Thanks.
Before I was a teacher, I was a therapist. Inner child work was very popular at the time. Those of us who worked with adolescents used to joke, “I tried to get in touch with my inner adolescent but she told me to fuck off.” Our colleagues who worked with charming young children were horrified. We, of course, howled. Inner knitter, rock on.
Oh jeez. Thank you. Now I know it’s not schizophrenia or Peter Pan syndrome, just my inner knitter.
And to Pam (4/11 9:17pm)–I’m almost 3 weeks post op ACL repair–you can totally knit with percocet, it just warps your sense of time.
Loved, loved, loved this!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My inner knitter really really likes Habu……!!!!!!!
i have 3 daughters, too. 2 of them have done or are going through the teenage years. You describe it perfectly!
Would it help if you slipped your inner knitter a Depeche Mode CD and $20, with a tip as to what local shop has the most black lace/fishnets/eyeliner/nail polish/hair dye/leather?
My inner knitter/quilter/embroiderer has an emotional attachment to the dust bunnies in the house. She would be heart broken if they went.
That’s harsh, dude.
I think this is my favorite post of yours, ever. I can’t even say why. It is just… perfect.
Oh my goodness, that explains what was happening to me today. I just recently found Ravelry, and no matter how hard I tried to get work done today, I would suddenly find myself back on Ravelry. I have so much work to get done but for some reason my Inner knitter wanted me to spend time cataloging my yarn and needles stash even though I was at work and obviously did not have access to that information. She also kept trying to convince me that it was more important to look through wonderful knitting patterns, as opposed to working on my code for my deadline. Because of her influence, I had to stay an extra two hours at work to make up for lost time.
Oh heck, take your inner knitter, turn her into several WWE wrestlers, make some of them bead whores- (Shawn and Rey) HeY! (Me) And you’ve got the menagerie in my head. All they want me to do instead of the commisioned cabled Shawl I have on the needles is a many cabled wrap. *sigh*
THAT is what it was! Over the weekend my “inner knitter” woke up and told me that everything I had been knitting lately was crap (she really wasn’t far from wrong on that one)and I just HAD to cast on something new and awesome. It took two days of pattern surfing, casting on and frogging, to finally settle down with one shawl pattern. I knit on the new pattern a grand total of ONE day and then proceeded to pick up some bulky yarn and knit a super simple pair of fingerless mitts. Yeah, that Inner Knitter is a serious BITCH!
That is so funny. I just negotiated with my inner knitter last week, to only work on what I had on the needles and clean the house for Easter company. Then I could cast on something new on Monday. It worked and we are both happy now. Neither of us was happy last week.
Just. So. Brilliant.
[Substitute any ‘preferred activity’ after ‘inner’, and there you have neatly summarised the dilemma between what you SHOULD be doing and what you WANT to be doing. If this is not the essence of the human condition I’d be very surprised. I am NOT surprised that textiles have this awesome power over us, however!]
Great post! 🙂
My Inner Knitter doesn’t give a rat’s ass that the dog is just recovering from a nasty case of giardia, & the kitchen floor needs to be thoroughly scrubbed & disinfected before the new puppy comes home. She really wants to cast on the afghan that I should have made before winter. And maybe a puppy sweater.
Hunh. You just described my current life. The article on deadline is moving like a glacier, but the sweater (there is a deadline and purpose for that, too, but not nearly so pressing) is growing rather nicely.
I can totally relate!! Right now we are getting ready to move for my husband’s new job. A move that is going to financially wipe us out. And yet I have decided that I absolutely must design a baby top, and it must be out of four colors of Spud and Chloe. I have decided I need to do this now, even though I am knitting a sample for someone on a deadline. I know I won’t be touching anything but the sample I’m knitting until I’m done, and yet my inner knitter yelled SO LOUD for 3 weeks that I finally conceded semi-defeat and allowed her TWO of the four colors. Thinking that would do it, what happens two days later? She pipes up and starts whining about the other two colors! Blargh!! There’s just no talking to that girl sometimes…. lol 🙂
My inner knitter just convinced me to stay up until 12:45 am knitting, instead of going to bed at 9 to get up for a 5:30 am yoga class. Inner Knitter – 1, mature yogi – 0…
My inner knitter shot herself in the foot over the Easter Weekend. She spent so long knitting while listening to audiobooks that the outer knitter now has wrists that start to ache whenever she knits for longer than a row or two. The outer knitter has now switched to spinning so she uses a different set of muscles. The inner spinner is happy and is flouncing around taunting the injured inner knitter saying “I’m using a Bosworth, while out to dinner, with ALL YOUR FRIENDS and they are SO IMPRESSED”. I think some sticking out of tongues is taking place too. Now I just need to keep the inner spinner away from the bay of evil with my credit card as she already has some beautiful batts coming her way and 500g+ of alpaca that I bought her less than a month ago.
I’ll note that her BFF, your inner procrastinator, only comes for sleep overs when you have deadlines. You know how teens get, hiding in their room with their heads together, giggling, then coming out to ambush you. Best of luck.
Yeah – that ‘inner knitter’ is exactly why I’m sat here reading this blog instead of writing a video script about accounts production software right now.
My ‘inner knitter’ is a lazy ass. Except when it comes to crafts.
My outer knitter isn’t much better though tbh. *sigh*.
And at the age of 38 I still love Depeche Mode – so maybe there’s no hope for me?
Beautifully expressed.
And now I have a way to visualize and deal with my inner eater, too! Thanks
I’m sure there is a rather grand and long-winded medical term for this condition…
My inner knitter keeps buying yarn to make hats… wool hats… and I live in south Georgia, where one really doesn’t need a hat. What’s that all about?
It is such a relief to know I’m not the only one that deals with an inner knitter. Thanks for describing her so very well.
There are many, many days when the only thing that keeps me from ditching work to go home and knit is letting my inner knitter read your blog. It’s a great fix! Thank you!
My inner knitter makes me follow your blog obsessively for new postings. Instead of being addicted to reading about knitting or surfing pattern porn on ravelry, I SHOULD be knitting more, so just cast on for another pair of socks!
This post is a revolation. It’s exactly right. It never occured to me before that the whiney voice in my head going “I’m tired of working on this stupid blanket. I want to make a purple lace shawl!” is the voice of the teenager in my head… (and I’m the grown-up saying purple lace? we look like hell in purple and Kate can’t wear wool!)
😀
My inner knitter loves sock yarn, and blue lace.
Wow, you nailed it! I too hadn’t clued in to who that voice, I just know she’s often such a pain to deal with (but, i admit, fun to play with too!).
The only reason my inner knitter lets me go to work in the morning is the health insurance benefits, oh and the pay check. She needs that for all of those “bargain” purchases. You know the ones: hand-painted 100% merino for only $4.25 a skein, a sweater’s worth of cash-merino for under $50, discontinued colorways that will never come back. Unfortunately, I’ll ever knit it all up with this darn job I have to go to every day.Sheesh!
Your inner knitter was on vacation and just got back when you had something else to do. This teenager needs some attention. What to do? Let her play in the stash! LOL
A chocolate knitter addict bead whore pattern porn tart? Oh shit, I’m twins!
Close the door… Wait, do I get the stash when you die?”
SNERK!!!
THAT’S IT!! Normally, I am a completely responsible homeschooling mother of 9 (well, 5 at home), a woman involved in some community responsibilities, a regular adult sort of person.
And some days, all I can focus on is surfing Ravelry for new patterns, reorganizing my stash or knitting incessantly. The kids are demanding three meals a day–and they could fix their own, but there are no groceries and I can’t shop because I am so close to finishing this project…
It all makes so much sense now. 🙂
I love the visuals in this blog entry. You are such a gifted writer. Keep working and we’ll keep reading and buying!!
A few years ago, at my knit night, one of the girls confessed to me that she thought that I and my ravelry username were two separate people. I used to have visuals of me arguing with a mirror image of myself over what to knit, etc. and to this day, when she invites me anywhere, I’ll tell her that I’m coming, but tollbaby (my screen name) can’t make it 😉
That’s pretty much what this post brought back to me. I had an image of a teenage goth Stephanie arguing with grownup Stephanie just like I’m pretty sure most of us with teenagers can oh so easily imagine…
Made my morning 😀
So that’s who I keep hearing, my own inner fiber fanatic!
Five pairs of socks cast on. . .hmmm… I love that idea… my IK ran away from home after the fall out from searching for the perfect yarn for a linen stitch scarf (HAVE TO HAVE NOW NOW NOW!) and failing miserably to execute after spending $55 that should have gone to bills. I hear aknockin’ at the door! Welcome home honey!
Great post, tks
This explains so much! Thanks for the insight 🙂
Thank you for an explanation of my behavior when under the stress of job with a deadline. My inner child (not even as mature as a teen) will want to run out and buy enough yarn for an afghan!
Stephanie, I love the way you write and the way you speak to us knitters! You still inspire me all the time to keep up the knitting. Your work and your blog are AWESOME! Well, I only have three pairs of socks on the needles (six actual socks because I knit a pair at the same time = 3 pairs), so maybe I can start one more pair! We’re discussing it now, me and my inner knitter. 🙂
Sheila
I totally hear you. My outer knitter knows that I have a massive actual paid work deadline in 18 days, but my inner knitter wants to read yarn/knitting blogs today.
Sigh.
I never quite thought of it that way. MY Inner knitter is my family telling. You work too hard(I have a fiber farm of rescued fiber animals). Get off the computer ( I have to sell said fiber to feed said animals). Go knit something ( they aren’t gonna do it for me). So sometimes it’s quadrupled (inner knitter,hubs, daughter, son)…. … I’m so outnumbered.
sigh… Be glad you only have one inner voice.
I have several….and they argue with EACHOTHER. It really annoys me when they tell eachother to “Speak up, damn it!”
Wow. Your inner knitter’s intense. I can imagine her lying on her bed, her black t-shirt with “Bet you wish your girlfriend could knit like me” pierced with stitch holders, and paging through the Ravelry patterns on her iPad. She’d roll over with an exasperated sigh when you check in with her: “Whaaat? Oh. I’m not hungry.”
Mine’s telling me that the BSJ commission in cotton is not as important as knitting up the sample of suri/huacaya alpaca laceweight I hand spun the other night.
You’ve nailed it right on the head. My inner knitter allows my kids to watch Disney movies all day on a Saturday and not clean anything so that she can work on a sweater. And, in celebration of this post, I’m giving in and letting her cast on a baby hat AND a baby sweater today! (I can always try to work on her not to make her shopping list for the Webs Tent Sale next month later!)
I must admit, on many days I want to let her win… Lke today, but then the kids ask for lunch and well they are loud too!
You are so in my head!! thankyou!!
My inner knitter said I’d make 7 toys for Christmas, then her and my outer knitter ran away screaming when my daughter started teething.
So funny. My inner knitter literally woke me up two mornings ago, demanding multiple big fat squishy skeins of expensive Madelinetosh in Tart for something fast and easy. Like I can afford that. All I had was a learning project in something sensible. My IK’s still bitching at me.
I’m not even a knitter but my inner knitter makes me go read your blog before I do any other work. It makes the live at home college student bearable, the sewing sitting on the machine not so pressing and gives daily life a smack of fun. It’s totally OK to be silly on the inside and responsible on the outside. I love it!! Thanks for explaining it so well.
This may be my favorite post of yours, ever. It finally all makes sense. Blame the inner knitter…
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha hic! Why you always talking ’bout me?!?!?
Simple mantra I use when that inner knitter gets too loud:
“Nobody has permission to influence my mind but me.”
Might sound kinda strange, but it works like a charm. She quiets right down, and gives me space. Sometimes it takes several times throughout the day, but it makes getting all of the big stuff done (including things I love to do!) easier. (Less opposition=more fun.)
Have fun!
I know what you mean. I have this great pattern for a shawl sitting in my knitting bag, and this awesome yarn with gold flecks in it that was kinda expensive but perfect for the project. It will be really, really gorgeous and challenging and fun and interesting to knit.
My inner knitter only wants to cross stitch.
Best post ever. Also, the best-timed. My Inner Knitter just finished spending two hours mucking around in the yarn room, happily making lists, filling boxes, and organizing for the upcoming change of storage. Others in this household have been wanting me to do this for a long time, but my Inner Knitter will only do it when I, like the Yarn Harlot, actually needed to spend today editing three columns for a looming magazine deadline and pulling two more columnists out of thin air.
Brilliant post, Stephanie. Love it. I have a 16 year old girl, and an inner knitter and you hit the nail on the head. Petulance and obstinance are prevelant in both. At least my inner knitter isn’t going to the prom with a mysterious senior. Give me strength…
Totally, completely, relatable….
This also explains why some days NOTHING sounds like fun to do, no matter how many different projects you’ve got going
The inner knitter I know likes cocktails, knitting, food in that order. ON a good night she partakes in all and wonders what happens in the morning. Know anyone like that?
Isn’t it ironic how you can finally get the kids to grow up and out of being teens only to find you still have one you absolutely canNOT ever be rid of.
“We have met the teenager and she is us.” to paraphrase Pogo.
So *that’s* the explanation. Sure glad someone figured it out. I always enjoy your blog, but you seem to be on top of your game when your inner knitter is giving you the gears. Great blog!
Love the use of the pronoun “we.” It helps to share the guilt!
Hil-a-ri-ous!! I hosted a dinner party last night and spent the last couple of weeks fending off my IK to get the spring cleaning done while I had the party as incentive. I’ve spent today in my pj’s, enjoying the clean house and planning what to knit for a baby due in 2 weeks! And Marie @ 8:17 AM, lol, I hear you about the wool hats–what’s up with that?! Sometimes I feel like the only person in town who even wears hats (because I have to show them off)!
Girl, I hear you. My inner knitter never wants to knit when there is nothing else going on. Hmm, evil plot or total denial of stuff too intense to deal with anyway. Or perfect, legal escape from stress. With gifts to distribute when we’re done.
I just had an A-HA moment. My inner knitter must be one-handed and one-footed, it’s the only way to explain why I always have to fight to cast on the second sock or mitten……..
I was so pleased with my focus on the two projects with looming deadlines. Then I read your post.
Now I’m obsessed with the 2 weaving projects I started yesterday. No fair contaminating the rest of us!
Wait…
You have an outer knitter???
Years ago, my IK was loud and demanding till the day my child threw my knitting into the toilet. She flushed the IK away. Child is now married and moved away, i have my IK back.
Oh Steph! How I love how you see the world, interpret it in such a humourous and truthful way, and tell us about ourselves.
My inner knitter has been quiet for several weeks, allowing me to catch up on a few books and pay attention to important changes happening in my life. Honestly, I kinda miss her meddling, but she does tend to quiet down when the weather warms up. She has been whispering, however, about a lace weight cardigan. She’s fearless, my girl, and always pushing me in directions I’m trepidacious to go. I kinda love that about her.
That’s why knitters have kids. To train for this….
I’ve noticed my IK and RL14YO sort of take turns winding me up. Recognise much?
My inner knitting is quite the chatterbox and basically never shuts up–but I’m currently finding that my conversations about responsibility and book deadlines go much better if I soothe her by purchasing yarn for “after the book”.
It doesn’t bode so well for the stash (or perhaps it bodes very well), but here’s for functional coping strategies!
Wow! I have the twin sister to your inner knitter only she wears purple nail polish.
Right now my inner knitter is arguing with my inner spinner, who wants a set of hand cards. (Thanks Jacey B. and Deb Menz!) Thankfully, inner felter has been quiet lately!
I don’t know about my inner knitter (she’s an introvert and wants to knit socks) but we do have a real life 14-yr old who locked herself in the bathroom as soon as the Seder was over to text her boyfriend. It would be less of a problem if we had more than one functional bathroom.
This might be my favorite blog post you’ve ever written. You always hit the nail right on the head. My inner knitter is pretty loud, too–but I’m a control freak, so I tend to ignore her. I think I need to listen to her more often, actually.
Everybody has an inner teenager that rebels at the idea of what MUST be done. Mine told me to stay home tonight and work on my socks all evening and night, you know, to catch up with lost time this week. Stupid inner teenager, I have choir practice tonight and staying up isn’t an option..
Hahahahahahahaha……
Yum, chips.
My inner knitter’s birthday is next week and I am weakening. Well, in my defense, I do have a 15% off coupon for one of my LYS. Madeline Tosh DK, Madeline Tosh DK, Madeline Tosh DK. And I have NEVER had any Madeline Tosh……….
Great blog!!!! Thank you.
that made me laugh so much. i thought it was just me having fights with the inner knitter. mine hates exercise and thinks it is a much better idea to just sneak in a few more rows that go out for a bike ride…
I can’t stop laughing, with a few tears — from mother-of-former-adolescents PTSD — mixed in. And yes, it’s the inner knitter/gardener/painter/slacker in all of us that never grows up, bless her, and keeps the adult from being crushed by all the serious parts of life.
We must have been related in another life. My inner knitter is also quite loud and unfortunately (fortunately?!) she is openly aided and abetted by my partner! It can be very rewarding (and expensive – Fleece Artist Silk anything) but……
Thank you for writing this. It explains so much to me about me. Maybe medication isn’t the answer….
I think our inner knitters would get along. Let’s set them up in a playdate. Do you have dill pickle chips? I’ll bring the Shiraz.
This is an absolutely BRILLIANT post! My inner knitter has been pouting and stamping her foot, even though I’ve TOLD her we can’t knit anymore until this “tennis elbow” thing goes away. SHE doesn’t care that our arm hurts, she only wants some pretty scarves with the lovely yarn already wound and ready to go….. Heaven help me, I think she’s winning!
So… Imagine having a teenager-like inner knitter, while *being* a teen. I have zero impulse control I tell you! I want sock yarn and I want it now! 😛
My GF calls her Inner Knitter “Howler Monkeys” – because when they act up they jump up and down, shriek and fling poo.
My inner knitter ordered a shawlette kit when my back was turned. The color is a gorgeous celestial blue, the yarns merino,mohair & silk,and the lace pattern is charted only, which I’ve never attempted. What was she thinking? That I have knitting friends who can help me push the envelope, I guess..Sneaky devil. Love the blog.
Oh, I can SOOO relate —
I have papers to grade, and I’d rather be knitting socks. Can I ask my undergraduates to knit for me instead of write?
JUST this weekend, my inner knitter saw Creme Brulee on Ravelry, and had to have it. It was late on Saturday evening, and without giving it a thought, I bought not only the pattern, but the recommended yarn to the tune of $76! WWIT?! Inner Knitter will have her way sometimes.
LOL – at work! I even forwarded it to my husband – he laughed, too (and we don’t have teenagers!). I love the line “wishing her bangs were longer…” I assume you took your examples from personal experience. One of your funniest ever.
You need to knit yourself some ear plugs to block her out, let me know if that works ha ha!
My inner knitter was in fine form last week as I was shopping for yarn for a sweater for my husband. Because of her, not only did I end up with enough AMAZING organic cotton yarn for that sweater (the man won’t wear wool, pity me) BUT also yarn for 2 baby sweaters, plus pattern and a pattern and yarn for a hoodie for my daughter. And it’s 90 degrees today.
On the plus side, I’ve swatched for his sweater and have the back of one baby sweater done. And I’m still feeling the joy of knitting. Heaven help me when my inner knitter falls back into teenage enui – I need her help to get this all done!
I firmly believe that avoidance and procrastination lead to creativity.
THANK YOU!!! You have just explained so much, so perfectly!!!
Harlot, how is it that you can see inside my head? Can it be that there is another me walking around on this planet? I have always thought of myself as an individual….unique….one of a kind. Am I just a type? Are there hundreds, thousands, millions of people out there like me – like us? I know we are all beset by inner struggles. Yes, I have always known that, but I didn’t know that their struggles are EXACTLY like mine. Okay, now that I have said that, I must go and see if I can my inner teenager to get off the Internet and go to bed. It is after midnight and SOMEONE has to work tomorrow.
Oh yeah. I know her sister, Inner Quilter! Actually I live with her. She is a little crazy, which is a nice balance to my rational self. Just when I least expect it, she starts cutting out a new quilt. Usually when she has no business doing so. Aren’t 6 unfinished quilt tops enough for anyone. Sometimes she even starts sewing BEFORE the cutting out is done. We don’t even know yet if we have enough of the right fabrics. And her fabric habit is something else all together. I’m thinking of an intervention….but that may require me facing up to reality….so I guess I’ll just keep living with her.
I also have a baby knitter. Two unfinished projects next to my chair at this moment. And the yarn habit, well that’s also a bit lofty!
Happy Birthday RachelH!
Stephanie, where arrrrrrrrrrrrrre you? No blog post in days and I’m getting twitchy. I sure hope all is well in your world.
I love the experience of having raised multiple teenage girls that comes through this post. It’s just way too amusing.
My friends and I have a policy of going to yarn shops in groups, so that inner knitters may be quashed by more sensible and less motivated friends.
Unfortunately, last time that ended with me holding a skein of Kid Mohair going, “It’s so soft and pretty!” with my friend going, “I know! You should totally buy that!”
Hope your deadlines were quashed and that knitting is still fun.
Well of course it wants you unemployed, is there anything better in the world than having you at her disposal all day long without unnecessary absences due to work? You could just cut some corners and squeeze in unavoidable cleaning, laundry and cooking in some five minute breaks and the two of you could have fun or argue the whole day 😉
No money for more wool or some decent red wine? No problem, stashing is a wonderful thing, could occupy you for quiet a while (well the wine might be an issue but my little knitter replied you could drink tea instead, you have some stash there too…).
My IK just discovered some stashed goods yesterday we totally want to knit, when we tried to hide some new acquisitions from the other inhabitants of our household and we decided we could totally go with a breakdown of the electricity in our town or something not too terrible that would prevent going to work or working with a computer for at least a weak. If it wasn’t for the freezer which helps us to get more time for knitting while working, sigh. But It’s difficult at times to negotiate and find the right work/knitting balance, at least with an attention craving or dramatic IK and a real toddler around…
You’re awesome.
That is all.
OMG, you make me laugh so hard… I love your blog!
Perhaps we could just rename your innerknitter. Perhaps she is your weekend persona, your retired persona or I don’t know what. But lets not call someone who wants to create something lovely and enjoy herself a teenager. Does that mean adults don’t want to do those things also? This next sentence is for those of us who are retired. If today was my last day on earth would I clean the bathroom, or knit?” Provided the bathroom doesn’t smell, just hang up the towels (or put them in the washer, put 4 other things in their rightful spots, be it drawers, or medicine cabinet. Pour some cleaner in the toilet and swoosh it around. Use a household cleaning wipe in the sink. Now, that didn’t take to long did it. Now knit, knit, knit. What’s the problem.
Thank you for letting me know that the conversations (and arguments)I am having are with my inner knitter. Today she was asking me if I wasn’t just in love with idea of knitting socks as I was trying to save my first pair of vanilla socks from being ripped apart. As I was binding off tonight and tried on the first sock I was able to say “Hah! I’m going to be loving knitting socks – – so there!”
Hilarious post! I’m glad that you wrested control from your inner knitter long enough to detail your travails.
To Sara at April 12, 2012 12:51 PM: That EXACT SAME yarn has also invaded my head and won’t leave me alone. Going to LYS today to see if it has come in yet. They can’t keep it in stock.
YH, how do they make a yarn do that?
I was first alerted to my inner knitter when listening to the podcast ‘Cast On’ by Brenda Dayne. since I have become aware of her I am discovering ways to deal with her – at least she will do the housework if she can have Cast-On to listen to ……how many times has she listened to some of those episodes? And I have had to ask my son to change her eBay account password to help with the yarn diet. We are getting there – but her younger sister inner weaver now wants a loom for the yarn that inner knitter has no use for.
Inner teenager, huh? I’ve always described mine as my inner brat. She’s very oppositional/defiant (we both have ADD), and her favorite phrase, “I don’t wanna…….” As in, “I don’t wanna fix supper, I wanna knit.” I don’t wanna go to bed, I wanna read.” I’ve never thought about simply asking her what she wants — I’ve only thought “shut up.” This is gonna be interesting……