It's the March Break. Nine days with three teenagers kicking around the house trying to eat everything that isn't nailed down, leaving a wake of filth everywhere they go, and dedicating every cell in their bodies to keeping me from writing a single word. I have several strategies I will be employing to ensure that I may come out the other end of this with my sanity intact. Todays tips:
1. Only buy enough food for one day at a time. Teenagers will eat all the food you have, regardless of how many days it is intended to feed them. This is confusing to rookie adults in the house, because while the teenagers are consuming their own body weight in food every fourteen seconds they will also loudly state (screech or wail) that there "IS NOTHING TO EAT IN THIS HOUSE". The hypocrisy of hurling this into the universe while you are hoovering up an entire package of pita bread and hummus washed down with a litre of apple juice mere seconds after eating a half bag of carrots, two oranges and a salad is completely lost on them. Trying to get teenagers to not eat all the food you have is like trying to take a meal away from a pride of wild lions. The only thing I have figured out to deal with this is to fill the house up with 5 tons of healthy food a day and try not to stand between them and the fridge.
2. Knit socks.
These are Regia Brasil Color #5478, finished and (get this) tucked away for Christmas. I know. Stunning foresight. Don't expect it to continue.
If you work from home you aren't going to get anything done anyway, and if you work outside the home you are going to spend all of your free time grocery shopping for the ravening hordes as well as trying to restore order to your life. Give up now. Knit simple.
Work on something where you can just do a row or two here or there. Lower your expectations of yourself, you just want to get out of this alive.
3. When the going gets rough, distract and reward yourself with beautiful projects in languages you don't speak.
This is going much better with many thanks to several good ideas and the help of Anja, Lene (go look at her beautiful stockings) and various other witty, charming and kind Finns. Paljon kiitoksia!
Save these involved projects for when you can no longer stand to be in a room with three teen girls who are all arguing about who has the right to the computer (Hint: there is no winner) and need a way to mentally excuse yourself. Go sit on the floor in a corner of the kitchen and knit something tricky or weave in ends.
Do not look up. Do not make any noise. If you are very quiet, they may not find you until the food runs out and their primitive instincts kick in. Good luck.
Posted by Stephanie at March 13, 2006 1:52 PMIs it break time already? Here's hoping you (and they) make it through alive. Don't forget the other coping mechanism of choice: alcohol!
Posted by: LisaPA at March 13, 2006 1:57 PMI thought teenage boys were the ones supposed to eat eveything including the rafters. Go figure. Mittens a gorgeous so far. See that. will power IS enough to knit from a pattern in a language you don't know. Good job!
Posted by: Julia at March 13, 2006 1:58 PMWow. That mitten looks great!
Posted by: Jessica at March 13, 2006 1:59 PMOh dear. It's that time again already? The Finnish project looks fantastic, though I think I might faint at all those ends. Wow. And I love the socks - amazing foresight, but inspiring as well. Good luck! You're in my thoughts as I start on week three of nearly constant company at my home.
Posted by: moiraeknits at March 13, 2006 1:59 PMWishing you the best of luck on keeping your sanity (what is left of it). I have a 5yo girl who already eats us out of house and home, so I'll be in your shoes before long.
Gorgeous mitten!
I know it's early days, but you haven't broken out the chocolate yet? (I know, you're saving the screech for later in the week.)
The bits of the mittens you've previewed are stunning.
Hang it there, the end will be here before you know it.
Posted by: Diane at March 13, 2006 2:01 PMThe mittens are beautiful. Love, love, love the colors. Maybe you could trim the ends so they don't hang out the cuff and just call it extra insulation!
Posted by: mellie at March 13, 2006 2:03 PMBTW, CHRISTMAS!?!?!?! You always have a way to make me feel like such a wastrel.
Guess I'd better get busy(ier).
My teenager has been left to wait for the garage door repair guy, with the responsibility to complete the numbers on the cheque for work completed. Phoned at noon to find out the guy had not yet arrived, of course, because I woke the teenaged beast at 8 am. If I'd left him asleep the guy would have pounded on the door at 8:02 and the corpse would not have arisen.
His bleat to me when I phoned? "I'M BORED."
Posted by: Judith in Ottawa at March 13, 2006 2:05 PMGood luck. Hope your survival plan works. And I couldn't agree more on the food thing - they eat whatever isn't nailed down and then complain that there's nothing to eat.
Posted by: Carole at March 13, 2006 2:06 PMHere in the states our break isn't until the end of April. The teachers are losing their minds. My sympathies are with you but honestly, when it's time to send them home for a week, I breathe easy! :-)
Posted by: GoddessKristin at March 13, 2006 2:06 PMWhew, Finns to the rescue!
Good luck with the break. Wish I could eat like that again, lol!
Posted by: ck at March 13, 2006 2:07 PMIsn't there any more concrete-pouring to be done? Put 'em to work!
Posted by: Presbytera at March 13, 2006 2:09 PMAh, to have that metabolism again! But I agree, there is no point in having more than a day's food in the house when teenagers are home, they will eat it all. I have another 3 weeks until our spring break, I'd better start saving the grocery money!
Posted by: Judy at March 13, 2006 2:11 PMHow long will it take them to find you if you sit by Mr. Washie?
Posted by: Melissa at March 13, 2006 2:12 PMI've used very similar strategies when dealing with two four-year-olds that somehow talked me into giving them sugar.
Of course, it's simpler when they're only four. Take them to the playground (knitting all the while) and insist that they go play until they wear their little bodies out.
Their tummies are smaller, too.
Oh! I forgot! I had a knitting AND Olympics moment this weekend. I just wrote it up over here:
http://moiraeknits.blogspot.com/2006/03/strange-blip-in-my-universe.html
Bizarre. But cool.
Posted by: moiraeknits at March 13, 2006 2:17 PMThe mitten is breathtaking! I love the colors. Fortunately, I don't have to worry about spring break...I have no children. But I've found the job and the husband tend to impinge on my knitting time more than I would like. Ah, well...that's life. Good luck these nine days!
Posted by: Teri S. at March 13, 2006 2:19 PMThis is the first March break since 1986 spent WITHOUT EVEN ONE of our three girls and entourage of locusts, er, friends. Sniffle. Someday you will understand why you should feel sad for me. What's Hank doing this week? Grace
Posted by: grace at March 13, 2006 2:20 PMI'm glad you finally learned to knit in Finnish!
Posted by: Briana at March 13, 2006 2:21 PMYes, but will you:
1) Remember about the Christmas socks when the time comes?
2) Be able to find them?
Don't hit me!
Posted by: Nina at March 13, 2006 2:21 PMFirst of all - if you put those socks away now, there is no way you will remember their hiding place in December. We both know that.
Secondly, I have to knit for my sitter - she gets the kids for March Break - I'm hiding out here at the office. This is going to cost me at least a pair of socks!
Thirdly - those mittens are stunning! Just stunning. Even worth weaving in all those ends...
If 3 teenagers eat all your food, then more teenagers can't be any worse. So let them invite their friends over; it won't cost you any more.
Then, send them off to their friends' homes to eat someone else's food.
The more you invite the first time, the more days they have to go elsewhere.
Posted by: Elizabeth at March 13, 2006 2:28 PMI told my daughter that if her bedroom was cleaned up spotless by bedtime tonight, and a small pile of stuff was donated for a flea market, then we'd go look at yarn, and maybe buy her some. Plus she could get 2 headbands.
Right now she's next door playing, because the sun is shining. She may get a break on the bedroom thing, and be given an extra day, because tomorrow is supposed to rain.
Eeek! Good luck!
Posted by: Kat with a K at March 13, 2006 2:30 PMAll you need now is a teenage boy. And a tornado. I got both on the same night. And I wouldn't let them open the fridge while the power was out---torture.
Horray for early Christmas knitting! (are you feeling ok?) ;) I have the same idea! bought some sock yarn for Christmas socks - now, to start them!
Good luck on the food thing - I find big bowls of popcorn are helpful with hungry kids. Keeps them chewing for a long time.
No one bothers Auntie Audrey when she's knitting, reading, or doing anything she enjoys, even if it's pouring buckets outside and we've just run out of toilet paper... Auntie Audrey has a sword collection. >:)
Posted by: Audrey at March 13, 2006 2:41 PMThe Finnish knit looks amazing, Stephanie! Have you tried keeping food next to you when you need to hide and toss it to the teens when they get restless to distract them? Might give you a little more time. I can't wait to see the mittens when they are complete. Oh, and I admire the Christmas gifts! What inspiration!
Posted by: irishclover at March 13, 2006 2:46 PMWow, those are beautiful mittens!!!I was just looking at my newspaper and all the odd things people knit. We have here a complete digestive system from tongue to...the end, jelly fish, a life size uterus, liver, and mini pieces of clothing knit on 0000 size needles. They call it street art and zombie knitters.
Posted by: amylou at March 13, 2006 2:46 PMWhen the two teenage stepdaughters visited at the same time last time, I said, "On the first argument over computer usage rights, the computer's power cord gets lost for a day. The second argument and it's lost for the duration of your visit." There wasn't a single peep to be heard.
And you might wanna designate someone to remind you, come mid December, that you have those socks stashed away. There's nothing worse than remembering a week too late.
Good luck, Stephanie! The mittens are looking great . . . maybe you can stash a sandwich in your knitting bag so you have some sustenance for yourself later?
Posted by: --Deb at March 13, 2006 2:49 PMAll I can say is it's a Very Good Thing that the Knitting Olympics and Spring Break did not coincide.
Posted by: Chris at March 13, 2006 2:51 PMExcellent knitting strategy. I'm with Melissa, though: if you sit in the kitchen, aren't they likely to find you while pillaging for food, even if you're not too near the fridge?
Posted by: Lucia at March 13, 2006 2:53 PMWasn't it just winter break? And this means summer's just around the corner. Good luck :)
Posted by: Vicki at March 13, 2006 2:53 PMOh.
I just got a little breathless there with the mittens and the colors and the sweet gradations in the background colors...oh my.
Then those ends brought me right. back. down.
You're intrepid. It's not the Finnish (well, that too), but the finishing.
(ducking and running...)
Posted by: mamacate at March 13, 2006 2:56 PMYou could hide here; DD has to work during her spring break (3 jobs), so I don't imagine we'll see much of her this week!
Posted by: Diane at March 13, 2006 3:01 PMBe careful - you just may forget where those socks are by the time Christmas rolls around....
Posted by: diane at March 13, 2006 3:04 PMIt's evil to suggest, but have you considered scheduling publicity trips for your books during school breaks? Or is that risking too much devastation?
The suggestion of hiding out next to Mr. Washie is a good one - they'd never find you, and with some sturdy ear plugs you'd not hear the arguments.
Posted by: AuntyNin at March 13, 2006 3:10 PMOMG. Wasn't it just Christmas break last week? an you send them to a distant relative's for the week? The socks are great and the mitten is simply fabulous.
Posted by: Stephanie at March 13, 2006 3:11 PMThe appetite of a teenager is mind boggling. I remember my brother routinely eating morning cereal out of MIXING bowls. You can always send THEM off to the store for the food, with a well defined grocery list and barely enough cash to cover the bill. That will give you about 10 mins. of peace, right?!? Mittens are looking fabulous already! Congrats on the leap past the language barrier.
Wow . . . you can knit in Finnish. I bow to your tenacity. Our spring break is next week. On the bright side, I can take a shower in the morning and use all the hot water because the teenagers will all sleep late. My glass is half full. For now . . .
P.S. Those mittens are simply divine, the colors stunning. I love the color gradations.
Posted by: Cindy B at March 13, 2006 3:16 PMI can feel your pain, Steph--when I was pregnant with my toddler, in two weeks of maternity leave I sewed two quilts and finished a sweater for myself... now that I'm on maternity leave WITH my toddler, I'll be lucky if I can manage to keep the house clean and finish one crocheted blanket... (not to mention the effort of avoiding the temptation of using the toddler as a mace to swing at the middle schoolers who are A.lazier than dead lemmings, B. losing IQ points as adolescence creeps in and C. Yes. Eating me out of house and home and stealing my diet rootbeer which is the one thing that isn't making me fatter and doesn't give me heartburn.) There's a reason we have them, but I swear, once they devour all our brain cells during gestation, we forget what it is...
Posted by: Shanny Mac at March 13, 2006 3:20 PMThose are beautiful mittens!
I am a teacher of young teenagers and I wish with all my heart that break was here. Alas, I have 2 (yes TWO) more weeks before break. WAHHHH
They are surly, argumentative and just downright antsy!
Posted by: Linda at March 13, 2006 3:21 PMSteph,
I have to confess that I love March Break at your house. You give us such great parenting tips! Must take notes.
I love your mitten.
Posted by: kern at March 13, 2006 3:24 PMOoh. I'd leard a foreign language for those mittens.
Posted by: Anne at March 13, 2006 3:25 PMGive each one enough moolah for a treat, and drop them off at the public library. Should be good for a whole afternoon. Repeat as necessary.
Posted by: Juti at March 13, 2006 3:27 PMHow do you say "weave in ends" in Finnish? (ducking)
Posted by: Cassie at March 13, 2006 3:27 PM"IS NOTHING TO EAT IN THIS HOUSE".
A refrain that's constantly said in my house too! Food lasts a little longer with 19yr old son away at university, but the two remaining teenage girls still devour the pita and hummus.
Socks made 9 months before Christmas? Way to go. Just remember where it is you tuck them away!
Posted by: Maureen at March 13, 2006 3:27 PMThat mitten (it's a mitten, right?) is simply breathtaking. I love the colors, love them, love them, love them. St*rm*re herself would be proud of the way they melt into one another.
Posted by: Beth S. at March 13, 2006 3:35 PMI sypathize, I really do...
but whilst everyone else on campus is enjoying the sunny southern springbreak, I must work in my dungeon-like industrial grey office. To add insult to injury, a co-worker is blasting bad mo-town and screeching along at the top of her lungs.
I'm willing to trade....
Posted by: cadi at March 13, 2006 3:40 PMWell, since you're not going to get any work done this week anyway, what's to say YOU have to be in the house? Go have lunch or coffee with friends. Go sit in a quiet spot in the ROM and knit. Or if you're worried about what the house will look like when you get home, after breakfast send them off with a TTC Ride Guide, a pocket full of tickets and strict instructions not to lose each other, or be home before 5 pm.
Posted by: Rachel H at March 13, 2006 3:40 PMI thought it was bad knitting with a 22 month old around. I had hope for the future. :(
Posted by: iraida at March 13, 2006 3:47 PMFor someone who doesn't know Finnish, you are making beautiful progress on that mitten.
Try your best to survive. I am surprised at the teenage girls eating you out of house and home. I have one stepson aged 12 who tries to eat us out of house and home, even with just being home after school. I'm not looking forward to Spring Break in 2 weeks!
laughed out loud when i read about your troubles with teens! amazing how their mouths can be full of food while still whining loudly that there is nothing to eat in the house! next they'll be saying they're bored and theres nothing to do...find a good hidey hole, grab your ipod, put on your earphones and knit for your life!!!!!
Posted by: vickir at March 13, 2006 4:07 PMWow, I know it is early into the vacation but you sound so much better than last year. Your coping strategy looks sound, now you just have to work the program and you will sail through the nine days with your sanity intact.
I homeschool so my strategy looks a little different. The most important part is "Go away! I need my brain for myself right now."
Posted by: em at March 13, 2006 4:18 PMOh ho well I remember the there "IS NOTHING TO EAT IN THIS HOUSE" days (& my daughters are 29 & 32!!!). Pointing out that the cabinets & frig are full to overflowing does no good. In their teens my girls seemed to live on Ramen noodles. That mitten is breathtakingly gorgeous!!! I am most impressed with the socks for Christmas - do you think you'll actually be able to hold off on giving them to the recipient? I know I always start something for my grandsons thinking - nice for Christmas or their BD's but always end up giving the item to them as soon as it's finished.
Posted by: Donna at March 13, 2006 4:20 PMOh how well I remember the there "IS NOTHING TO EAT IN THIS HOUSE" days (& my daughters are 29 & 32!!!). Pointing out that the cabinets & frig are full to overflowing does no good. In their teens my girls seemed to live on Ramen noodles. That mitten is breathtakingly gorgeous!!! I am most impressed with the socks for Christmas - do you think you'll actually be able to hold off on giving them to the recipient? I know I always start something for my grandsons thinking - nice for Christmas or their BD's but always end up giving the item to them as soon as it's finished.
Posted by: Donna at March 13, 2006 4:21 PMI know this is a little off topic and I hope in answering this you don't have to give away your hiding spot from the "ravening hordes" but - Will you be touring for your new bookbookbook?
Posted by: Andrea at March 13, 2006 4:25 PMYour girls eat really healthy food. Good for you! There never seems to be enough food when kids are involved. Shopping daily actually makes sense...God help me. Love the socks. Maybe I'll look up that yarn. I want to make socks for my sons girlfriends (really, they're friends that are girls). They'll love them and wear them with their Chuck Taylors. Thanks for the laugh!
Posted by: robyn at March 13, 2006 4:37 PMway to go on the early Christmas knitting!!! and also for feeding the crazy teenagers healthy food...........now I know what to look forward to in the next few years
Posted by: Noodle in NC at March 13, 2006 4:37 PMI'm salivating over the colors and texture of those mittens-to-be. Really glad you found some Finn help. If I had 3 teenage girls in the house, I would sign myself in to a psychiatric hospital...if I didn't, I would just find myself forcibly placed there on or before 9 days were up!
Posted by: Beverly at March 13, 2006 4:42 PMIf you don't feed the kids at all do they go to somebody else's house? Just a thought.
The mittens are wonderful - where did you get this Finnish pattern?
Posted by: Holly at March 13, 2006 4:42 PMI sure hope you have more than one bathroom. If not, I really pity you. I have all three of my offspring home right now too....oh, wait....they're always home, I homeschool. Silly me. No wonder I never get anything done. Hang in there, you'll survive this week. If all else fails, whenever they ask you for something spout some Finnish at them. That'll shut 'em up.
Posted by: Steph Bolinger at March 13, 2006 4:51 PMAh, the house full of food and nothing to eat! That's because it's all ingredients!
My kids wanted meals ready to eat, not stuff they had work to make into something ready to eat.
Posted by: Katherine at March 13, 2006 4:55 PMThose mitts are totaly amazing--you are too for reading finnish instructions.WELL DONE. I'd be framing such an accomplishment. You GO girl with the Christmas knitting started you 'll be in GREAT shape
Posted by: Joan(eau) at March 13, 2006 4:56 PMWishing you strength, fortitude, yarn, and alcohol.
Posted by: Kathy at March 13, 2006 5:26 PMHooray for the early Christmas knitting! And, yes, that's a bit self-congratulatory, too, as I knit a scarf and put it away this past week for Christmas, too. Luckily, I have one box for Christmas gifts to accumulate (except for the ones for my own two kids, 'cause I'm not stupid), so I won't forget I knit it or where I put it.
I'll consider it a case of "great minds" and thank the stars that my son's spring breaks are staggered and the first isn't till next week... oh, and that I work out of the house!
"Nine days with three teenagers kicking around the house..."
Aw, who are you kidding, you love that! ;D
Good luck, see you on the other side!
Posted by: June at March 13, 2006 5:32 PMOkay, those mittens might be worth the Finnish craziness. Might.
Posted by: Imbrium at March 13, 2006 5:57 PMStaph, could you post a photo of the back of the gloves? The transitioning colours look v. reminiscent of Kaffe Fassett and I've never figured out how to carry all those colours behind.
Thanks and hugs in advance.
K.
Yes. Spring break. Lucky me -- I got to ship my teen off to visit her dad. The down side (yes there is a down side!)? She gave up junk food for Lent. For once, I wouldn't have heard the universal "nothing to eat" wail. And the socks? Be sure to tell SOMEONE where you've hidden them. Please! For the love of wool! The mitts are breathtaking. Good job.
Posted by: Carol at March 13, 2006 6:20 PMI keep hearing Eleanor Parker as the Baroness in The Sound of Music: "Darling, have you ever heard of a lovely invention called boarding school?"
Posted by: Franklin at March 13, 2006 6:25 PMHot dang. That's some beautiful yarn turning into a beautiful mitten.
Posted by: Tipper at March 13, 2006 6:25 PMLet's hear it for projects in languages we don't understand. My collogen-enhanced Japanese bird, and your gorgeous colorwork.
Here's what I do over Spring break for my 3 teenage boys. Hang a side of beef in the garage, and give them each a fork and butter knife. Eventually they just go at it with their bare hands, anyway.
Posted by: Kim at March 13, 2006 6:42 PMAh stephanie, you have teenaged GIRLS. I only have 2 of the boys living at home just now but they eat constantly. It's a wonder my little girl ever manages to get any food around here. Next month we will have all 4 boys at home for 2 weeks, the oldest just turned 20 so technically he isn't a teenager anymore but I'm willing to bet that his appetite is still prodigious.
By the way, when is book #3 actually going to be available?
Excuse me while i clean the drool off of my keyboard a while. Your mitten is the most amazing thing i think i've ever seen, knit wise, that is...;)
~Suz~
Posted by: Suz at March 13, 2006 6:53 PMMy best strategy when my teenage girls are at home and I need time alone? Act VERY interested in them, like I REALLY want to spend some time with them (this is especially effective if I hint that I want to TALK!). Suddenly they get quite busy, I can get my work/knitting done, and then I am refreshed enough to actually enjoy their company.
Good luck!
Um...Stephanie? You know what would be fun (where have I heard that before)? Being the official translator for Finnish mittens!
Posted by: Bonnie at March 13, 2006 7:16 PMStunning mittens!
And a hint about tucking away the Christmas 2006 knitting: Don't tuck it away too far. It'll be Christmas 2007 or 08 if you're not careful. Leave a trail of notes in likely to be found places in ample time pre-holiday season. Think of it as a treasure hunt you are setting up for yourself. Personal experience talking here...
Posted by: Patti Blaine at March 13, 2006 7:41 PMHyperventilating.over.the.mittens. More info please?
Posted by: Jan at March 13, 2006 7:45 PMI've found that if I didn't keep food in the house, the teenagers would go elsewhere in search of a meal.
Hiding in the basement, near the washing machine is good too. If the teenagers come near to get their clothes, sweetly suggest they help fold and they will leave immediately.
Eventually they will stop coming home for Spring Break and go to Florida. Which has other issues....but at least they'll leave you a quiet house in which to worry
Posted by: Robbi at March 13, 2006 7:46 PMSteph-
You're SCARING me! My children aren't as old as yours yet, but they are 8, 7, and 3 and they are all GIRLS! Love your blog AND your book (Yarn Harlot) Thanks for the giggle despite my fears!
Megan in Indiana
I would definitely forget where I had stashed the mittens 9 months earlier...or even that I had made them, for that matter.
Good luck with the hungry horde. When we were growing up my brothers and I used to complain about the lack of food in the house, but what we meant was the lack of junk food ~_~
My former teenager is all grown up and moved away. I wouldn't mind if she wanted to take a break from her real life and spend a flash-back-to-spring-break with me! Want to send one (only one!!) of yours over to my house?
The mittens looks good. :-)
By the way, the link to Lene's site didn't work.
Joanne, The Canuck in Colorado
Posted by: Joanne at March 13, 2006 8:18 PMStephanie, Isn't there a bookstore in Nome, Alaska calling to see if you can make a book signing this week? I hear the Iditarod needs more mittens for the mushers and you could be making booties for the dogs. There are a heck of a lot of dogs needing knitted Fair Isle booties.
Of course you might need to be on site to do this, right there in Nome, handing out mittens and booties as they cross the Finish Line, taking you far from the sweet family scene you portray, so maybe you wouldn't want to go.
namaste
Having just accompanied 4 adolescent females to a cinema marathon today, I know of just what you speak. I am perfectly willing, at this point, to set myself adrift on an ice floe. Wishing, in fact, for a passing uninhabited ice floe. That's rough, here in the midst of our great sea-surrounded land mass, at least two hours' drive in any random direction from a great lake, but still a more uplifting prospect than another six feakin days in their company.
Oh, and right back atcha with the simple, sooooothing knitting: pair number three (for the week so far) of the idiot-simple fingerless gloves on needles now.
We shall overcome. Or maybe that's overcast. Whatever.
Posted by: Lynneski at March 13, 2006 8:53 PMI'd like to add my experience to the rest of those who are dispelling the myth that only teenage boys eat a lot. I first read this post while on my first of two after-school bowls of cereal. Since then, I have consumed a good-sized dinner, two bowls of frozen raspberries, and another handful of cereal. My spring break is next week and certainly my mother is glad I'll be on a Habitat trip instead of at home, eating (at the very least) a bowl of cereal and some fruit every two hours.
Posted by: Emmarie at March 13, 2006 8:59 PMMy son will be on spring break in 2 weeks. I'm actually looking forward to it because of something called "camp". Ok, it is only 3 hours a day, but that's 3 hours of mildly guilt free knitting.
For your information, a 6 year old can also eat his body weight in food in 14 seconds. That's alot of cheetos.
Good luck!
Dawn
My condolences to you regarding the March Break...
I just went back to school today after our break...not much longer til graduation now!
Posted by: Shelley at March 13, 2006 10:06 PMGa Ga gorgeous Mittens* Is there a life line from where they're from? Thanks for the chuckles;)
Posted by: Diane E. at March 13, 2006 10:14 PMhey, you've got girls. you think THEY eat alot? try 2 teenage boys. heck one is just a tween! (they're 11 & 13). they get to the point where all the food is gone, they start gnawing on the woodwork, asking for the salt shaker, and commenting on the lack of taste. seriously, i fed them a large supper at my fiance's at 615, and we got home at 730, and both exclaimed at the top of their lungs "MOM, I'M STARVING, WHAT'S TO EAT!" seriously. i'm waiting for them to dig into the cat's food bucket, and start gnawing on the leather shoes and casting hungry eyes at the cat and me. pray for me
Posted by: minnie at March 13, 2006 10:30 PMremeber these times for when you ship them off to college. my mother just lost me to the dreaded dorm and my baby brother is leaving for boarding school next year wich will leave her with ONE child in the house (if you dont count my dad) and he a senior in high school. imagine shopping for just two! also, quick way to make them dissapear is to ask for volunteers to help with laundry, dishes, spring cleaning (haha) oir ask them how their homework is coming on. i always find something to do real quick whn those subjects come up. hehehehe.....
Posted by: Tommy at March 13, 2006 11:38 PMI thank you for the closeup, because I have charted them already. great googley mooglies, those are breath taking.
Make soup. It slows the food consumption down, because they balk a little, but eventually figure out that they can't deny that soup is in fact, edible, and goes with pita bread and hummous.
OMG are those mitts GORGEOUS!!!
Please, please, post another link for those of us insane enough to need to order said kit NOW
This is the first year all our girls are gone ( three lovely daughters all in their 20's and the two cutie granddaughters living oh-so-far away). How I long for the music of all their voices, but am also loving the sound of my husband's whispers. Best to you, Stephanie. Blessings, Julie
Posted by: Julieanne at March 14, 2006 12:54 AMSome more Finnish-English translations for your lovely mitten project:
"to weave in ends" = päätellä langanpäät
"Weave in ends" = päättele langanpäät (mood: imperative, 2. singular)
:-)
Posted by: Tuuli at March 14, 2006 1:51 AMI too work from home so I completely understand. Last week I had my four year old home sick from school and a murderous deadline on a piece of work. I managed to do 40 hours work, look after a sick child, produce a meal (of sorts) for my husband most evenings when he got home from work and start a new sweater in Rowan 4 ply Tweed. The only thing keeping me sane was the joy of knitting and a glass of wine at the end of each day. Roll on summer!
Posted by: Yvonne Dean at March 14, 2006 2:37 AMI am the finnish mother of three adult children and the grandmother of four grandchildren of the eastern part of Finland.
I admire your determination and your delightful style to write.
But "Imbrium", you should to know, that our nature is over ½ year white because of snow and the colourful, warm summer lasts only three months. So , we need colours during long, dark winter. We have plenty of grazy, colourful and beautiful knittings :)
My daughter was 9 years old, when she was knitting her first knitting.
Now I am teaching her daughter to knit and I feel my life is rich of colours because of grandchildren despite the dark winter!
Have a nice day!
I have a 16YO (as of yesterday) and a 6YO. Between them and my brother I am AMAZED that I ever have any food in the house. I suggest that you teach your girls how to shop and how to cook.
Also, WHERE did you get that mitten kit and WHERE can I get one?
Posted by: Jayne at March 14, 2006 3:33 AMWell, my kids aren't off until next week. So I have another week with only one child at home. After Friday afternoon, all bets are off.
I am so glad you translated your pattern. It looks really beautiful so far!
:)
Okay so should I take it as a bad sign that OS (8) and YS(4) seem to have that same eating attitude as your girls? What happens when they hit their peak in their teens? I guess I'll need to hit the lottery.
LOVE the mittens. If I could swallow all the finishing, I might try. But once again it's that whole child leech factor that stops me. (Think of that Keds commercial where the kids shoot cars under the bathroom door at mom)
Don't do what I do with the early Christmas stuff: I hide it and by the time Christmas comes around I've forgotten all about it until the presents are all opened and then I'm thinking ...I'm SURE there's something missing... but usually can't even REMEMBER what it is. When I find it MONTHS later (in May, once) I go ahead & give it. If I save it again, I'll forget again. This has happened so often, the family doesn't even look at me funny any more.
Posted by: Ellen at March 14, 2006 7:53 AMI am impressed! One Christmas present down, how many more to go!?! Remember me ... I had my Christmas knitting finished by the end of the summer last year!!!!! Hope you survive March Break. I don't have any little gremlins but yesterday, when out doing my errands, they were everywhere! I was ready to run home screaming ... thankfully, none of them belonged to me!
Posted by: margaret in Nova Scotia at March 14, 2006 8:41 AMI KNEW a language barrier wouldn't be enough to keep you from those mittens! And good thing, too - they are GORGEOUS. I am smitten with your mitten! (I know, I'm sorry, I'm not done with my first coffee yet).
Posted by: Ang at March 14, 2006 9:26 AMMy hell with teenagers doesnt begin til Friday and will last through next week.
I am going to try the only have enough food on hand for one day. Juice and Arizona Tea too.
Maybe I should just lock myself in my bedroom.
I also have 3 teenagers (and, by the way, it does not matter if they are male or female - they do eat you out of house and home.) But I should mention, mine also, beyond eating, can't seem to entertain themselves for very long and figure I need either to cook for them or take them somewhere. At this point, I come up with chores for them to do and they suddenly become invisible!
Try that. Every time you hear the fridge door open, say "who is that?..Hey could you please..(chore)..." Buys you a little peace anyway;->
Ang
That mitten is absolutely beautiful!
I like the strategy of providing them with only healthy food, though. If they're going to graze you out of house and home, it might as well be nutritious! :)
This tip for dealing with ravenous teenagers only works if your refrigerator is full. Put the "good stuff" in the back. A typical teenager will only stand and look into the refrigerator and take what they can see without effort. This also works in the freezer for that special Ben and Jerry's Chunky Monkey or Dublin Mudslide!
Posted by: Laura from beautiful West Michigan at March 14, 2006 10:08 AMI've thought of starting some Christmas knitting, but I can barely keep up with all the baby gifts. Good luck, and keep the screech handy.
Posted by: Shell at March 14, 2006 12:20 PMGOOD LUCK WITH THOSE TEENAGERS. i FOUND SHOPPING AT THE 24 HR SUPERMARKET WORKED AT LEAST THE FOR STAYED ON THE SHELVES FROM 2AM TILL 6AM.
Posted by: BLOGLESS SHARON at March 14, 2006 12:46 PMUm, guys? I'll grant you that it's Tuesday and that maybe Stephanie cannot drag herself away from spinning for Joe's gansey.
However.
Does no one else remember the Great Mitten Epidemic of November, 2004? (Check Nov. 29, http://www.yarnharlot.ca/blog/archives/2004_11.html Not for the faint-hearted -- it ain't pretty. Well, all right, it's pretty, but...)
I smell relapse. Yo, Team Toronto -- go to Yellow Alert. Stand by for Intervention (hang on -- it's gonna take a minute or to for That Laurie and me to get there.) (And that is, TOO, grammatical!)
Posted by: rams at March 14, 2006 3:18 PMWith respect to remembering where you put the Christmas socks - do what my mother does, and create a "Where the Hell Things Are" notebook. She never moves it more than a few inches from it's proper place when she consults or writes in it, and uses it to note where she has stashed the Christmas gifts she buys throughout the year, and other such things. A "Where the Hell Things Are" file on your computer would work to, just don't forget to back it up now and then.
Posted by: Claire at March 14, 2006 4:00 PMI hear you about the whole food issue. I have one teenager in the house and it's ridiculous how has food disappears if he's even within a 2km radius of the fridge! Good Grief! I've been contemplating chains and a padlock... Or making him pay for the groceries in chores completed. Hope you survive the break!
Posted by: Barbara from Nova Scotia at March 14, 2006 4:06 PMRams, surely this isn't a relapse. After all, those were Latvian mittens. These are Finnish. Apples and oranges. I'm sure she can quit any time she wants, she just needs these to take the edge off... just a bit of simple mitten knitting. Before we know it she'll be back to lace or tiny Tink sweaters and her usual self again.
Posted by: Maggie at March 14, 2006 4:31 PMI apologize to the world on behalf of my age group.
Here are a few useful translations (please don't bite me, I am only the messenger):
1.) "There's nothing to eat" = There is nothing that I really like immediately available to put in my stomach.
The effective response my mother used when I wouldn't eat the available food: "You must not be hungry."
2.) "I'm bored" = I am unable to do what I want to do right now, so I'm going to mope around because no other activities seem interesting.
Suggesting things to do only makes the teenager less willing to do anything. Threatening that they will be forced to do something they hate if they don't find a way of entertaining themselves can be more effective. No promises though.
A note on teenagers: We eat a lot. Sorry. That's how our bodies work. Same thing goes for sleep. We are (in general) lazy. Friends are the ideal form of entertainment, closely followed by technology.
Disclaimer: This might not apply to all teenagers. If it doesn't apply to yours, thank your preferred deity(s).
Once again, I apologize for my age group.
Posted by: Sarah at March 14, 2006 4:51 PMThat yarn is gorgeous! Is it handspun? Or, perhaps, commercially available? (she asked hopefully?) Please please please divulge! I am taking two teenage girls and a five year old from Arizona to Texas for spring break. Yikes! It would be nice to have some on order to look forward to as a reward if and when I make it back!
Posted by: Angie at March 14, 2006 8:07 PMGASP. Those Finnish mittens are absolutely breathtaking. As I noticed when they took my breath away. GASP. And the braid edging is lookin' good, there, too.
I *love* that your daughter knows how to spin. Yay!
There is space behind the laptop for yarn.
Posted by: Elizabeth at March 17, 2006 5:25 PMPleez, pleeze, pleez email me a copy of your Jessica Simpson shawl pattern. I have a teenager and I'm not about to empty my wallet to buy one.
Thanks so much!!!!
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