Still life with citrus

This morning, in a desperate attempt to appease my children (it’s really only a matter of time until they are completely feral you know) I gave Sam the digital camera and my knitting and nominated her photographer for the day. Sam’s mission, to photograph the Mango tank top in a creative way.
The Rules.
It must be interesting. (Sam feels that this should be easy, considering that all I do is “stick it in a bush”, the kid has a point.)
There can be no nudity. (I really just gave her that rule to make her say “eeewwww”)
There can be no foul language or lewdness. (This is necessary since Sam is still young enough to think that anything involving the region of your body between your knees and your belly button is hysterically funny. Even just the word. As an example of just how far this goes, Science teachers for kids this age hate teaching the planets. There’s going to be no way to get around saying “Uranus”)
Without further ado….The Tank Top. A photographic essay by Sam.
tiedye
“Sunrise over Mango Lake”
face
“My friend Tanka”
Tanklemons
“Still life with citrus”
feet
”Feet”
A few technical notes, the tank top now measures 9.5 inches. This means that I probably only have to knit 436 more rows before it measures 10.5 and I can get to the interesting part. The bobbins in the picture are both full, which means that I have slipped even deeper into the hold of the G4 project, and now appear helpless in the face of the fleece. In order to regain control, I have *not* washed more fleece, so I should have to stop when I run out. I’m also thinking that when I finish the third bobbin and ply the stuff and find out that all of this work has only made 75 metres of yarn, that should pretty much shut me down.

18 thoughts on “Still life with citrus

  1. Sam is a genius. Which proves beyond all doubt that the nut doesn’t fall far from the tree. I am especially fond of “still life with citrus”, although “sunrise over mango lake” was extremely lovely as well.
    Imagine my suprise when I reached the end of the tranquil photo essay, calm, serene, expecting nothing other than additional peaceful thoughts. Is that what I got? Noooooooooo. I got to spend 10 minutes cleaning coffee off my lap, off my sweater, out of my nose, and off the computer screen.
    Note to harlot- for those of us who are susceptable to spewing hot liquids from our noses when caught off-guard by hysterical humor, you might want to add some sort of warning symbol. Just a small flash of color, a few asterisks, anything really. As long as it’s a warning.
    Oh, and the IT guys at my office would appreciate it too. They said they are getting really tired of replacing my keyboards due to “mysterious beverage accidents”.

  2. hmmm…. I have been trying to catch up, and *apparently* while I take ONE lousy mini-vacation, you go and have a Birthday AND an Anni’
    ….the nerve.
    Well, here is a belated Happy Happy on both fronts. I am sorry to have missed the celebrations, but it looks that a fabulous time was had by all. Here! Here! to many more years of both for you and yours. 🙂
    And judging by the last few posts, I am thinking maybe you only have about 375 rows for your last inch. Having seen the pic of you in-knit-u, and having heard from Ken about the blinding speed of your needles, that should only take you about 3 minutes to knit up, so what’s the problem??
    I am loving the guest photographer. *Especially* Sunrise over Mango Lake.

  3. Sam, your pics rock – especially the “sunrise” photo!
    Harlot, did the warning labels fall of your babies too early? Oh, wait, it was my great grandmother that warned me about the feral side of babies. That’s why I stopped at one child 😀

  4. OOOOOOOH!!! Give that girl a camera more often! Those are great!!
    You seem to have made it out of the black hole…or it at least seems to be sucking less *g* Any suggestions on how? I seem to have a Faroese shawl stuck there…..

  5. I’m not sure which made me laugh more, the smiley-face of “Tanka” or Kim’s coffee story. Regardless, yay! (And neat tank, too)

  6. “Sunrise over Mango Lake” is lovely. 🙂 And its great that you’ve moved out of the black hole of tankdom!

  7. Another expression of praise for Still Life With Citrus. That’s just inspired. 🙂
    Maybe the squirrel was unravelling the tank to get back at you for keeping the fleece away from him. Now that Mike has arrived, he’s confused and is hiding, allowing the tank to grow at its proper rate.
    Kim’s coffee story wins the prize for that genre!

  8. Great photos Sam! Steph, have you seen the pins at knithappens.net? They have one that says “Yarn Harlot” and one that says “Knitting Goddess”. You could take your pick! 🙂

  9. No, no, no, I’m no math genius, but I think your calculations are all wrong. One inch times the velocity of Joe pulling the ribbon off the front of the tank when you’re finished, times (minus 39 plus the number of hours it takes to knit seven inches over and over again)(2) must come out to a number different than 436. Go refigure it, and I think you’ll agree.

  10. I’m very fond of “feet” myself, tho they are all lovely and creative.
    Norma, you neglected in your post to state if the ambient temperature is a factor in this calculation, and if so, is it in farenheit or celcius?
    Barb

  11. Still Life with Citrus is brilliant!
    I reckon you will ply and have 200 yards of yarn. It will still seem like you are carding and spinning forever and a day. I am thankful my husband is quite skinny.

  12. Totally off topic
    I just saw that Rick Mercer is covering the election on Monday, 7pm ET on CBC. I know which show I’m watching after I vote!
    Barb B.

  13. Clever idea, Stephanie. It’s too late for me to borrow this for my kids, and it’s too early for me to borrow it for future grandchildren, but someday…..I WILL borrow it. (okay, steal, whatever.) You still have a lot of summer vacation left (thank goodness for me since I’m an educator on vacation). I’ll be interested to see what you think up next.

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