Predictable

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Well, that ride didn’t kill me. I so appreciate all the comments that are so kind as to suggest not pushing myself, not taking risks… I hear you, and I feel really touched by how much you want me to be careful and to keep myself well. Rest assured that I am a reasonable adult who has got this far, and I have professional advice (not just internet advice, as much as I love you all) and there’s actually loads of research showing that for reasonably fit people who are more than 10 days post-covid (that’s me!) exercise can be preventive for long covid, and helpful in its healing. I acknowledge that there’s also some research that says that resting may be protective, but it’s a total mixed bag, and the best advice I’ve got right now is that exercise isn’t damaging, ignoring messages from your body is, so I’m not planning on doing that. Not ignoring messages isn’t the same as not trying though, it’s more about knowing when to quit, so Wednesday when I struck out for a 50km bike ride I was prepared to be flexible. My ride wound out fairly far, but then the last 15km were close to home-ish, so that I could bail if I needed to, when I needed to. This differs a great deal from what I’d usually do, which is ride away from home until I’m halfway, then ride back so that the only way to get back to the house is to do the full distance. I didn’t want to play too much with forcing myself to do anything right now, and good job because at the 44km mark got a nice clear message from my body that it was absolutely finished with bike riding, and I quit. This was a very unStephanie thing to do, but if there’s going to be any hope that I ride the Rally then setting myself back isn’t going to help. I rode the 44km and then I came home and knit, and rested and ordered dinner in.

That’s pretty much what I did for the next day, and the day after. It was scorchingly hot and I told myself that resting a few days was smart. That’s what I said Friday too. (I hope you see a theme developing.) I walked with Elliot to camp, I walked him back. I did some squats and lunges and other things I hate that should help me get some of the strength back that I had before this, and then I wound some yarn because I didn’t see how that couldn’t be helpful.

Paul Klee sweater, yarn from Tanis FiberArts

I should be working on this sweater, I love it and I really want it done, but predictably I’m struggling with the long tea-time of the soul that is the plain grey of the body after the excitement of the yoke. I’ve coped so far by not taking anything else with me when I go places, but I am feeling waves of discontent that are getting harder and harder to ignore.

The first idea I had was that I should use the leftovers from the yoke of this sweater to start a tiny one for Abigail, but I realized that in a day or two then I would have two plain sweater bodies to knit, and I must be maturing because I actually realized before I cast it on that I would be compounding rather than resolving a problem. (I know. I can’t believe me either.)

Then I thought about maybe making a pair of socks, because I have this skein of Barstow that Jill Draper sent to the retreat as an appetizer, and I am all about this yarn. Barstow is 100% Dorset, and I’m thinking about making a fabulous pair of socks, because I’m pretty excited about a non-superwash sock yarn. Dorset is a down breed – so it has a fibre that’s pretty fine, but also tightly and irregularly crimped. Each individual little hair goes back and forth in a wave and spirals at the same time, and that makes it very, very hard to felt – right off the sheep.

I got the Barstow out, I wound it, and I looked at patterns for an hour, and then I went to get a set of sock needles, and I reached up to the little ceramic pot on my shelf I keep them in (so they are handy for emergencies) and none were there. Now, this doesn’t mean that I am out of sock needles. It just means that I am out of sock needles in my office. There are still the living room sock needles and the stash room sock needles and the bedroom sock needles, as well as the ones I keep in my notions kit for when I am not home – but if I reach for some sock needles in the office and they’re not there, that does mean that I must have rather a lot of socks on the go. I put down the Barstow, slowed my roll and took a quick stroll through the WIP department where I found, well… let’s not discuss the number but simply note that I have absolutely no business starting another pair of socks until I finish a pair. Or seven.

I had a proper pout then, the sort that a knitter can really pull off when startitis is denied, and then I realized that today is Sunday, and tomorrow is Monday, and I’m doing a knit-a-long that starts Monday. Knitters from the last retreat are all knitting the Vibes tee- so I’m going to knit my swatch for that, and tomorrow I’ll get to start something new even though I clearly do not deserve it, which is pretty much my favourite way to get things.

Also tomorrow morning, I’m getting back on my bike and giving it another go. Hopefully tomorrow I’ll make it farther than I did last week, but don’t worry, I promise to be a total quitter if I need to be.

67 thoughts on “Predictable”

  1. Congratulations on doing 44km on the bike and well done for listening to your body.

    I loved reading your wonderful post about knitting, it’s so inspiring – although I wonder if having seven socks on the go is a good enough reason not to start another pair. That Barstow wool sounds amazing – must go and see if it’s readily available here in the UK!

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  2. Smart cookie. I knew you’d listen to your body and your doctor.

    Now quit slacking and finish that grey torso. Honestly.

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  3. We know you’re a sensible and mature person, but we also know (from many moons of reading the blog) how hard it is for you to “let people down.” I put that in quotes because I’m certain that you feel that way…that not riding this year would be letting many people down, including yourself. You’re much like my husband. He’ll damn near kill himself keeping a commitment even when not keeping it is clearly the way to go.
    All this is to say that we understand. We trust you to do the best thing when the time comes. But we’re worried about you! I sometimes threaten to hide my husband’s shoes so he can’t leave the house. If your bike shoes are missing on the critical day, know that someone in Toronto loves you.

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  4. Your body will tell you how far to go each day. Listen. I try to do a little housework each day, but when I start to get that little ache, always in the same place on my left backside, it’s time to sit down, pull out the heating pad . . . and the knitting.

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  5. I’m glad to see that you’re taking cycling and sock knitting cautiously right now. Better safe than sorry. As for the unending gray of the sweater, might I suggest that you make the sweater your daytime knitting and choose something paler or more colorful for your evening knitting? Maybe some of those unfinished socks?

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    • No comments on the bike. You know what’s best for you. Go Stephanie! Just wanted to say how much I love that sweater!

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  6. I’m proud of you for getting on the bike and listening to your body! It sounds like you’ve got a good balance of pushing yourself and resting, and I hope that continues.

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  7. I am so happy to get a good look at that sweater past the thumbnails my not-having-an-account lets me see on your Insta.

    Gorgeous. That looks like so much fun.

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  9. Thank you for sharing how the ride went. You’re pretty amazing to ride that far after covid knocked you down! And even more amazing to plan a different circuit that kept you near home.

    Thank you for listening to your body and understanding done means done.

    Keep in mind that Grey is just going to get more difficult to work as the light starts to shift with the next season. Perhaps cold frozen treats are in order for nearing completion points?

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  10. I’m sorry but I don’t see the problem here. Why can’t you just buy more sock needles? You obviously use them so they come under the heading of necessities. The number you already have in use are irrelevant. How will your LYS stay afloat if you don’t patronize them? LOL!
    Also, good job on listening to your body. Just take it slow and easy.

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  12. I just want to say that it’s good to “hear” your voice again. The sweater is lovely, as I am certain ALL of the socks-in-progress are. Personally, I don’t actually count socks as knitting. They’re more like “something I do with my hands” things…you know, like a fidget toy. Looking forward to seeing the Vibes tee.

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  13. So glad to hear about the ride! While not to that level, I’m also struggling to get back to riding as long as I used to. I keep having excuses and putting it off though.
    For a while, a plain vanilla sock was so important to me – background knitting, travel knitting – only now I’m absolutely bored with it and think I’m going to frog it to make a cabled sock instead

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  16. May your rides go well, and if you need to stop, then stop with no guilt because the body knows what it needs.

    Grey land knitting is hard, no doubt about it, and I’d pair it with binge watching something wonderful. In my case food incentives are just a bad idea, but you do what you need to do.

    I’m glad to see you back in print.

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  18. Um. Long time reader here. Remember that time you went to stay in a cabin in the woods in the middle of winter and you set out on a who-knows-how-many-miles, but very long, walk down a slippery, snowy road with less than 4 hours of daylight left? And then when the walk went wrong, you sort of suggested that The Blog should have warned you. I mean, you were kind about it but we could see you were disappointed in us, and we pointed out that when you were mooting the long walk we assumed you would leave early in the day, not wait til after noon. That, my dear Harlot, in a nutshell, is why people urge you to stay home if you need to, to follow sane advice and take care. Long experience. I’m sure you will attack the Rally with your usual fervour, and I’m sure you will be at the finish line, but it might be that you have to ride some of the way. And that’s OK.

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  20. Well, if you could count the number of socks that were on needles, you are ahead of me. Good for you for listening to your body with the training. And it WAS too bloody hot to do ANYTHING some of those days last week.

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  41. Knitting and ordering Dino Game dinner afterward is a perfect way to unwind after your ride! It’s all about finding that balance, and it seems like you’re doing just that. If you ever want to share more about your rides or any other recovery tips, I’m all ears!

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  45. Can anyone tell me where I can find that recipe Stephanie gave us? It was little egg things made in a muffin tin. I can’t remember the name and it would take a loooonnnng time to look throught all the entries.

    I miss having daily posts so much. I would be thrilled to have a weekly post even. Stephanie I miss you in my life.

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