1. I got back from Calgary yesterday afternoon.
2. I’m writing this to you from the airport because I’m leaving again.
3. I’m pretty tired, but I think I’m going to make it.
4. I had a totally fantastic time in Calgary at Pudding Yarn. They were celebrating their 10th year in business, and I can totally see why they’ve been successful so long. Great shop, great staff, great yarn. You should go.
5. I suffered a wicked case of camnesia, and forgot to take any pictures at all with my proper camera.
6. Except I took one or two with my phone. The toilet in my hotel room was heated, and lit up.
7. I was not a fan. The heating thing just makes it seem like someone just got up before you, but the way it’s lit up? I guess it’s so you can find the thing in the dark, but I, well. I think I can live without this particular technological advance. Some things don’t need direct lighting. This has just got to be one of them.
8. That will be all.
Laughing too hard to leave a meaningful comment. Thanks, I needed that!
I can’t decide which is more scary: that night-light toilet, or the one in the pub restroom in Munich where the entire seat (not just a plastic cover, but the seat itself) rotated through a sanitizer attachment as soon as you stood up. They both seem possessed.
I think I was in the same restroom in Munich!
So creepy. It’s like the rest stops on the 401 that have signs informing you that you can select less water or more water depending on what you just did in the toilet. And if you don’t choose, it will decide what you did based on the amount of time you were sitting down. Technology is great but sometimes….
…if only it included a target.
Definitely more important things to invent. Safe travels.
OMG!!! Hilarious!!!! No thank you … a nightlight will do!
Did it also do a bum wash? If it didn’t that’s too bad because those toilets are life changing I tell you.
I’m with you on the warm toilet seat thing.
The only time toilets should light up is when you’re sailing on the sea and you pump phosphorescence in. My then 10 year old cousin called it “Star Wars in the toilet!”
And I love Pudding Yarn from afar based solely on the name, no pictures necessary!!
Have to agree with you on the light-up toilets! Don’t go to Japan, where they open by themselves when you enter the bathroom, and then play classical music.
I agree that a warm toilet seat can be a bit off-putting, but I’d really appreciate one in the winter. There’s little as unpleasant as a cold seat in the wee hours of the morning. The lighting up part is a bit odd, but it makes for a great night-light.
FWIW, my Captcha icon for this post is the light bulb!
Points for clever use of “wee hours”.
As someone who’s totally convinced/paranoid that someday a snake or rat will be in my toilet and bite me in the rear I would LOVE to have a light up toilet.
I thought I was the only one with that strange fear!
Me too! Yay, I’m not crazy! Well, not about that anyway. ..
Me, too!!! Lasting fear into adulthood from childhood!!!! 🙂
My son just had a little field mouse taking a swim in his toilet. Of course, we are in Phoenix, so he was just cooling off. And now I won’t use the bathroom at his house!
Just what I need, something new to worry about.
I once had a rat come up out of my toilet because they were doing sewer work nearby and had displaced a bunch of them – scariest experience of my life.
When I was young, my grandparents had a cabin/cottage without electricity or plumbing. I set speed records doing my “business” in their outhouse because I was so afraid of a snake coming up and biting my arse!
Flush toilets are treasures.
Yep. I’m another who fears snakes in the toilet.
Count me among the snake fearing group.
tickled by your one photo from the trip 🙂 but I agree, light up toilets are a bit weird – a nightlite should be adequate
A light-up toilet (with what appear to be blacklights of some sort)…….that must be for those that miss the seat often. Or the drunks that need to find it in the middle of the night.
I don’t know.
Somewhere, I have a photo that I took of a bidet when we were in either Toronto or Niagara Falls. I’d never seen one before. To be fair, I was either 17 or 18 and in high school.
I still haven’t seen one and I’m in my 60s. Must be the places we stay at!
First thing my DH did in Japan was check out the crazy toilets – every hotel was different. Hi camera roll was wedding photos (why we were there) and toilets.
I don’t need a light-up toilet, but a warm seat in the winter I would appreciate.
Oh goodness, too weird.
And then my second thought: are those UV-intensive lights? They must be. I’m picturing telling my rheumatologist why I’m having a lupus flare THERE and watching him trying not to fall down laughing but just steady, steady, c’mon, keep a straight face till she leaves….
I’m hoping it’s not a UV light, or skin cancer of the butt is going to become a big-ass problem.
Sun-burn of the sensitive bits, explain that to the doctor.
Am I the only one who thinks it’s just a little odd that we have a photo of the (not-liked) toilet, but no pics of the wonderful store, wonderful yarn, or wonderful people?
I think there has been too much travel, and not enough sleep. 🙂
That black light toilet is just creepy. My first act would have been to call the front desk and demand that it be turned off .. the light I mean, not the toilet.
Yeah I don’t think a heated toilet makes sense unless you are in an unheated washroom–but then why not heat the building instead?
My guess is that the light is for the folks who pee standing up.
Did it mesure your bloodpresure or did it analyse your pee? It did, if your doctor called you, because your stresslevel indicators were too high because of fiberitis…..
Totally agree with you about the warm seat. A cold toilet seat, while shocking and perhaps uncomfortable, is very reassuring.
I suppose a UV light might be useful for disinfection… but if I were designing one like that, the light would only work with the lid down. I can’t see lighted toilets ever going mainstream, but maybe I’m just too traditional.
“ever going main…stream…”
I think I’ll show myself out the door now.
That is either brilliant or horrifying. The heat might be nice on a cold winter morning, but it would freak me out if I wasn’t expecting it.
Couldn’t agree more on the heated seat! Don’t like it. Won’t ever like it. Lights? C’mon!
Does it help a little that there are a bunch of knitters who are SO EXCITED about this coming weekend?!? I shall bring my little Aeropress and my delicious coffee and we shall all caffeinate together. Safe travels.
Another knitter who is totally excited about this weekend! I hope you get a great night of sleep tonight and have a relaxing day tomorrow before we all get there!
Who changes the bulb in the toilet? In my house, it would be out forever….
I love when you a post with “That will be all.” It usually means you have realized that you just went a wee bit too far! Thanks for the laugh.
That was supposed to say “when you END a post with”
Ha ha! “a WEE bit!”
Lights at night…kettles yes, toilets no.. Just plain wrong. But it did me me laugh. Did your wee look green? Colour combining and all that….
Good question!
Oh, Japanese toilets!!! Either basic squat china ones (although spotlessly clean) or many functions all labeled in Japanese. I think the person who said that the light was to assist with aim is spot on.
Snort!!!
I just got back from Ecuador, and the bathrooms in the Quito airport had mini TVs showing video ads on top of every faucet. My husband said they had them in the men’s room as well.
I wonder if it gets people to wash their hands more thoroughly.
It just looks wrong. Why do you need to warm a toilet seat inside a building that is centrally heated? Also not keen on the light. Usually hotel rooms are way too light and not like my home where we don’t have street lights.
Camnesia? I love that concept. And that toilet… well… aliens?
Shades of Crocodile Dundee. The bidet baffled him and I suspect the light would have freaked him out!
Let’s see… How many (fill in the blank) does it take to change the lightbulb in the toilet?!?!?
In spite of all the wonderful puns, I think you won this round.
ROTFLMAO
I expect the lighted toilet was indeed invented to spare the housekeeper (and barefoot co-occupants) the smelly puddles around the toilet. Weird, but understandable.
OH NO NO I am thinking the lit up toilet would be the best thing ever for the men in my life…in the middle of the night…maybe after a few beers, or not. No excuses for a missed target. And a warm seat hmmm in winter, might not be such a bad thing either.
That was great, I’ve never seen a toilet like that! I wish you the best of luck as you travel!
warm seats are weird to my bum…I think I would have to float some things in that light up water…like a plastic fish maybe
Like…a mini swimming pool…or a landing pad! Seriously, though, I volunteer at a place that has the toilet seat made of glow-in-the-dark material, you know the kind that is unassuming yellowish-white and absorbs light, then glows bright green when you turn off the light?? I’m guessing that someone thought it was hilarious when buying a replacement seat, and that few people would ever notice since the light would usually be on…except that I turn it off to laugh every time I’m in there, then turn it back on to complete my mission…
The toilets at my church are messed up so the water in them is hot. It steams your bum as you go. Very strange.
So if it’s uv does that mean that pee glows like it does with cats? Is that an advantage for the housekeepers? lOL
Too funny! The post and the comments. Funniest for me was “who changes the lightbulb?”
The Newcastle golf course outside of Seattle has heated toilet seats, which are nice on cold days!
Well, like everyone else, I just couldn’t resist the heated and glowing loo (toilet to Americans, like my dear husband, but I was not allowed to say that word growing up as it was considered lower class) …. very spooky, I think I would be freaked out. Though the point about the value of heating the loo seat in the middle of one of those fierce transatlantic winters is well taken. We solve the problem by have a wooden seat — it’s never freezing, and feels quite welcoming during cold spells. Now all we need is someone to invent a nice pattern for a knitted knee-to-ankle warmer that could be tucked around one’s legs on those occasions when things take a while … Steph??
You gotta come up with a catchy name for that one!
Loo friend??
Loo cosy?
Knee shawl?
Wee warmer?
Anyone got any better suggestions??
loo legs
I also have experienced the high-end Japanese ‘water closets’. Heated seats, and some other functions (there were lots of buttons, but I didn’t experiment).
We were in the Osaka / Tokyo regions in April during the Cherry blossom bloom time. The weather can still be a bit chilly then. Sitting down on a warm seat does make you think that it was just occupied, but my mother said it was quite comfortable during her nightly visit. Apparently we are used to room-temp or lower. I don’t recall if any had a nightlight. It might be helpful for kids.
We just visited our son in Kochi and they have a fancy heated seat toilet with a bidt and lots of buttons and there;s a mini sink in the top of the tank – when you flush water comes out of a little faucet and runs into the tank. They don’t have central heating and the heated seat helps – but when we were there it was summer and the boys kept turning it back on. Never tried the squat toilets that were an option in almost every public facility. A blue light…made me laugh..
I was in Tokyo in January and LOVED the heated toilet seat in the hotel. I didn’t decipher what all the buttons labeled in Japanese did, just the flush, but the heat was great.
In the rest rooms at my company there, the toilet seats weren’t heated, but they did make this very comical burbling sound, apparently a recording. I guess that was to cover up the sound of any activities you might be doing…
You have to admit that its a great color–socks in loo blue, anyone? (and MY photo was a man–the kind of figure you see on rest room doors 😉 )
I had an argument recently with my brother on the toilet seat issue, and afterwards was trying to think of a killing argument for why he should put the seat down instead of me putting it up (after finishing our business). I finally had an AHA! moment – men should leave the toilet seat down because women have to sit whether we pee or poop! Two sits beats one stand and one sit.
Speaking of going places, I’m going to the Flathead River Writer’s Conference in Kalispell, MT this weekend, and I am definitely going to suggest that they query you about being a speaker next year. They’ve never had a humor writer that I know of, much less a knitting humor writer – and you’re such a great writer and blogger you should be a presenter. It would also be the only way I could see you in person, since I live in the dark hole of Montana (whenever any advertiser puts up a map on television about where their stores or offices are located, Montana is almost always the empty space of the West). I hope the Flathead Writers take my suggestion.
The light in the toilet is GREAT. No more excuses by the guys in the house that it was dark and they didn’t want to wake anyone by turning on the light in the bathroom. As my friend’s bathroom plaque says, “My aim is to have a clean toilet; your aim would be appreciated.”
I totally agree on the heated seats–I also hate them in cars, just don’t like the weird feeling of a warm bum, it feels more wet than comfortable. As for the lights I am going to assume a woman designed the hotel and figured this way drunks could find the toilet in the dark or at least men at night could find the right place to urinate so that when their wives came in after them they wouldn’t get a nasty surprise. ;0)
On my list is to visit the toilet museum in India. It amazes me that something as simple as a toilet can have so many variations but I’ve never heard of a light-up toilet before. I’ll be looking for one now. I love how random this blog can be.
I think it’s meant to help gentleman guests take aim in the dark. Or to help any guest find their way in the dark.
We had to replace a toilet seat about a year ago. I did a scouting trip, and came home to report to my husband that they had models that not only shut themselves without a slam, but that had “task lights,” and he was all for it (until he saw the price tag).
Trying sooo hard not to laugh out loud at work!!! I had to stop reading the comments. 🙂
Glad you came to Calgary, your class was fantastic! And sadly, I could only remember the last joke, not the first 😉
We had a toilet in our elementary school that mistakenly had hot water running into it. We got a steam bath every time we used it!
…no to to the lited potty. Some things just need to be left alone…
But then again..if you are really drunk, and your tummy is doin backflips, it could be useful….?
Great for those middle of the night trips 🙂
Oh! So funny! A toytoy lit up and heated. Only in the cold dark north.
Spot on.
My dear friend Laura attended your class at Pudding Yarn in Calgary on September 22nd and raved about it. I spent this past weekend at her house visiting and knitting and she shared some of the things that she learned from you. It sounds like it was a wonderful class! And the history of knitted goods is so interesting! Thank you so much for sharing yourself and your knowledge in such lovely, intimate settings. And thank you for signing my “Knitting Rules” book! Safe travels.
I’m wondering if the toilet light is in the “blacklight” spectrum to show if the bowl is clean? If so, I’d rather have a lit up toilet seat. Enough said?
Like nutrition information on chocolate bars, that’s just sick and wrong.
I honestly thought that this was a photo of your phone that you had dropped in the toilet.
I stayed with friends who had a house in Kimberley where the loo seat was padded with foam encased in plastic so it was sort of squishy. It felt warmish to sit on but when you sat the foam padding was compressed so it gave out a sigh each time. Sadly it made no noise when you stood up which is surely when a sigh would have been so much more appropriate!
The toliet is just fantastic! I wish I had the same