This baby sweater, if you could see all the knitting that has actually gone into it, would be the size of an adult garment. The back’s been knit another time (killme) and now I’ve had to rip the shoulder all the way back to the end of the cable because when I was done, the top was bigger than the bottom. I tried to figure out how to make that a design element, but since newborn babies don’t wear a lot of really huge 80’s style shoulder pads (they don’t have the hair volume to pull it off) it truly presented a problem. I stared at it, pulled at it, blocked it, and could not figure out what had gone wrong. I had cast on 30 stitches, knit in garter stitch for a bit, then increased for the cable, then switched back to garter.
Now normally, I would be horrified to report to you that it took 40 minutes to work out that increasing totally makes things bigger, and that if you want something to be the same size at the end that it was at the beginning – then you should have the same number of stitches at the end that you had at the beginning. Normally, this would be one of those blog posts where I would be embarrassed that such a simple explanation didn’t make sense to me straight off, but frankly the working conditions around here make it a miracle that I figured it out at all…. and I blame Joe.
I was doing just fine (by a knitters standards) until my loving and erstwhile husband said something unbelievable to our daughter Samantha. Something no parent that worked from home would ever present to a determined 14 year old musician, should they be planning on surviving a summer. That something? The something that has made it a miracle that I know my own name or can function as anything other than a raving lunatic and leaves me proud, PROUD, I tell you, that I can even knit garter stitch, never mind count? He said this:
“If you learn to play the guitar solo from Back In Black, you will never have to do the dishes again. ”
All I want is a jury of my peers.
God help you. I can’t. And, now, counting is the least of your problems.
No dishes? Is Joe planning to do Samantha’s dish turn in her place? Then it would be fair.
Enjoy the music. It beats “Stairway to Heaven” repeated over and over again.
Show no mercy!!!!!!!!!
Count me on it. Dangerous move. Very dangerous move. I’m on the jury in a hearbeat.
Oh wow… As a mom – Joe, what were you thinking?!?! As a music lover – go Samantha!
Oh. My.
My prayers are with you
That is probably sufficent grounds for divorce in many places.
What was he thinking???????
Seriously, like over and over, ad infinitum????
Get thee to a quiet corner and go fetal woman. Only ear plugs and thumbsucking will do.
I’m usually quite against physical violence but holy cow, that deserved at least a smack upside the head. Yikes!
Guilty. Off with his head!
“Says who?!” would have immediately exploded out of my mouth. My stars. I can only assume he had a big grin on his face as if to say to the kid at the same time, But surely you know I don’t mean this.
Is he planning on doing them?!
Joe is a man after my own heart! The heck with the dishes, teach the girl to ROCK!
Guilty! I don’t even have to hear his argument. Just…guilty.
Oh, and, as for the 80’s hair/shoulder pads/baby thing, you’ve met and held Nathania’s little Ellie. If ever a baby could pull it off…
**************What?????????**************
I would acquit you of, well, virtually anything you felt it necessary to perpetrate. It is worth noting, however, that if he’s dead he can’t do dishes.
All I can say is OH MY GOD!! He is sooo going to keep you supplied in beer & wine. It’s the least he could do. Forget counting start drinking.
I’d have broken his other foot.
When you referred to Joe as your erstwhile husband, did you really mean “former” (which is what I think erstwhile means)? If so, I can totally understand, in the circumstances! Count me in on the jury. 🙂
Hello, my name is Juror Number 8.
what a great story to tell the grandkids…someday far far into the future
I told my son if he learned the guitar solo to Freebird I would buy him any guitar he wanted. Joe isn’t the only one who makes wild promises based on classic rock.
And he actually said that in front of you? Man, what was he thinking? Or, rather, was he thinking? Men. You can’t live with them, you can’t shoot them.
Gansey’s off.
I think I would sweetly give Joe a pair of rubber gloves to protect his hands while he is doing the dishes in Samantha’s place!
there is a way to survive it… put her outside with no amp, instead insist on headphones (you can get ones with volume control, and I think you can also get ones that run through the amp and cut the amp speaker).
Also insist that someone has to do the dishes if she manages the solo and give your husband pointed looks, and emphasize that you did not make the agreement, so you don’t have to work out the details to make it work in real life.
Oh. No. Way.
What is going on? You better check and make sure he hasn’t taken out a large insurance policy in your name.
Eleven year old son and the bass line of “Smoke on the Water”. Does that qualify me as one of your peers?
Okay, I was just getting over laughing about the whole 80s shoulder pad thing on a baby when the shear horror of Joe’s statement struck me. You gotta come up with something — that’s much quieter — to top that!! You are a smart, determined knitter so I’m sure you can come up with something. Good luck – may the force be with you.
Hope you love AC/DC because you’ll be hearing it a lot. How nice of Joe to volunteer to wash the dishes for your daughter.
Darling, do what needs to be done–no jury on earth would convict you! (Of course, making Joe do the dishes is probably what needs to be done…)
I told my husband this story, and he said “that was stupid!” Then he told our 7 month old son that if he learned how to play that guitar solo in the next year that he would never have to do the dishes, but the offer will be reneged when he turns 2. I agree with that.
I don’t know what would be more annoying, having my teenager practicing “back in black” over and over, or having her throw in my face “but daddy said!” every time I asked her to do the dishes, for the rest of her life. Probably the latter. Joe owes you big.
I like AC/DC! And I’m so happy Joe will be doing the dishes for the rest of his every loving life!!! That’s just more knitting time for you. (don’t forget to make ooey, gooey, sticky things when you cook. I think carmely, maply sticky buns would be a good start)
The least he could have done is make it the acoustic guitar piece from “Hotel California” by The Eagles. I know it’s lame, but you could have closed a door then and it would take a lot longer to learn.
How many looked up erstwhile?
I agree with Anna Marie.
I believe that as the Supreme Court Judge you simply overthrow his ruling as a violation of your Charter rights to peace and sanity.
I think it’s time to play “hide the guitar”.
What are the name of Joe’s pain pills, and how do I get some?
This backs up my life-long motto:
Boys are Dumb.
(at least they can be and I’ve found this statement has calmed and curbed the urge for violence.)
A girl’s got to rock and I do have to say that washing dishes is bad for your fret hand calluses.
Get her headphones for the amp, get him a lifetime supply of washing up gloves and a high stool so he can sit at the sink while his leg is on the mend.
Also, I would find a book of Johnny Cash guitar music and get her to master the hammer-on for some good old times!
So.. in essence, he was volunteering to do the dishes if she learned the song? Does he realize what he’s gotten himself into? 😀
Anything in the “You’ll never have to do (insert chore) again that falls in the housework realm isn’t a decision that can be made unilaterally (unless the partner making the statement is willing to take up the slack). If Sam is sucessful I wish Joe luck with HIS (formerly Sam’s) turn at the dishes. Your peers – be that knitters or mothers – ALL agree.
Please no whining! My 16 year old has taken up the drums! Currently I am saving every penny to buy him an electric set that comes with head phones! ha ha ha..
You know she can plug headphones into her amp. I have two at home with electric guitars… Praise God and Pass the Peas for Headphones!
Two things:
Joe’s a professional…music recording guy (actual name escapes me, sorry). He better hook Samantha up with some sweet headphones, so that you don’t have to hear it. Otherwise it might be something like “If I have to hear her practice that one more time you’ll never get any sex again, ever.”
If I were Samantha (does she read this?) I would totally rock that riff, and be sure to call Joe when I’m 30 to ask him to come over to do the dishes cause well, he said *ever*.
All right! Now Samantha is one of the Hell’s Belles!*
*women who like AC/DC; also name of Seattle-based, all female AC/DC cover band.
I take this a Joe volunteering to do the dishes more often. You don’t mention if you have sarcastic children. Had their Dad said this to any of my kids they would have called him up the first night they weren’t living at our house reminded him of his promise and ask where he (or the servant) was to do them.
Killer. I used to volunter to milk all the cows and clean out the barn in order to get out of washing dishes. Go, Samantha.
that is perhaps the funniest thing i have ever heard … but i don’t live anywhere near your house.
and the fact that the guitar solo is already indelibly stuck in my head after reading your post – i cannot even begin to imagine how you managed to type at all, much less string together sentences. good luck with this one.
Can we jail him along with my son’s music teacher who suggested he bring a trumpet home for the summer? I feel your pain.
Yay for the girl learning to play the guitar. But what does that have to do with dishwashing?? Why, instead, didn’t he offer to buy her a BETTER GUITAR or, you know, something music-related? I’m shaking my head in bafflement. And they still think they’re the “logical” gender…
I’ve taken heart from your repeatedly-knit baby sweater and am about to frog umpteen rows of one I’m making because I don’t like the wobbly way the front lays. It is, of course, on the buttonhole side, not the other one which could be covered up. Thanks for the inspiration.
No jury in the land would convict you) as we are wont to say in our household …
I feel your pain… I really do.. I live with a musician… a guitar teacher to be exact… now I love rock music, but this a guitar teacher who has to play Hannah Montana for his eight year old students… it’s very painful sometimes
I’m on the fence on this one. I intensely dislike classic rock, or a good portion of it, because of the radio station at work. Very few songs played are from the last two decades and I’m pretty sure the Who has one or two more songs than “Magic Bus”.
On the other hand, having long thought my name to be “Maxine Paula You-do-dishes”, I could overcome that intense dislike pretty quickly.
Rock on, Sam. And Joe, try Palmolive, it’s supposed to be softer on the hands.
wow. that is so much awesome that i kind of think that sam and joe might be able to get off on a technicality! oops!
🙂
Tell Sam that if she learns to play Back in Black you are going to move all of Joe’s sound equipment into her bedroom *forever*
If he can do it, so can you.
I’m listening to it right now. She should have this mastered in no time. She’s got several advantages over AC/DC, chief among them she’s young, she’s sober and she’s determined. No worries! Enjoy.
Does he play poker? ‘Cause he just proposed a lose-lose bet. Option one, she doesn’t learn it, but keeps trying. Endlessly. Over and over, and over and over and over and over. Forever. Or two, she learns it and then the bettor else (aka Joe) has that many more dishes to do. He does realize you can’t bet with someone else’s money, right?
Either way, don’t let him loose near a game of three card monty if you value your disposable income.
Ummmm, no. He must be planning to rent her studio space so that she can practice in peace. After all, you do need peace and quiet to EARN a LIVING. Clearly you cannot do dishes, as your hands are your livlihood! Also, yeah, boys are dumb.
So glad that Joe loves doing the dishes!
Oy.
So, does this mean that Joe is planning to do the dishes for her?
You can seek asylum in Chicago. We’ll take you in. We’ve got an extra bedroom and you can have as much yarn as you want. We also have whole house air conditioning, so you can knit comfortably in these god forsaken summers.
Do they accept Americans on Canadian juries? If so, I volunteer.
seems fair to me : make it as a rock chick, dont do the dishes..
( but then I have a dishwasher… oh, so did you …)
I’m with Johann. In my house that would mean that Joe is doing the dishes for Samantha from here on in. I’d suggest having her play said solo while he washes those dishes, every single time.
What?!? Is this guarantee transferable to future roommates and partners or is Joe going to follow Samantha her whole life so he can do the dishes while she dances around in a school boy uniform?
My daughter once learned to play the theme song from Hockey Night in Canada (on piano) in an attempt to get out of doing Christmas Dinner dishes. But dude, that was just one dinner. Joe would be in my bad books forever.
It sounds like Joe has volunteered to do Sam’s dishes for her. In my house, the dishes are completely under my stewardship. If I’d like help with them, I ask DH, or assign children (mine are still pretty young). If my other half told one of the children that, he would be on the hook for it himself, since he didn’t have the jurisdiction to make that call himself.
Now, if only Joe will see it that way . . .
As Annalea says, I assume that those dishes will be done by Joe. If not, no jury in the world would convict you of spouse-i-cide. Earplugs?
Sounds like a case of Justifiable Homicide to me!
It’s going to be a rude awakening when she moves out and realizes that “never” is a subjective term. 😉
Ah. I see that you can no longer knit because you threw your project at Joe’s head.
Oh nooooooooooooo!
Um, yeah, Joe is ABSOLUTELY doing those dishes. And couldn’t he have picked something different for her to learn? Maybe the entire accompaniment to “Dust in the Wind”? I like that one. That one might not have me gnawing my toes off in less than 24 hours. Maybe.
Poor Harlot.
What Rams said.
To paraphrase another male in your life: So, he’s lying to this person?!!!
I prefer Skin-a marinky-dinky-do (with hand movements), or perhaps some Baby Enstein soothing Mozart – probably has something to do with life with 14, 11 and 8 yrs olds – at least she isn’t fighting about lip gloss. When do you next get to leave the house?
Wow… in my house that would be suicide for my husband.
So when is Joe buying you a brand new dishwasher????
So when is Joe supplying you with all the yarn/fibre you could possibly ever need in order for you to keep your sanity?
I think Joe needs a doctor and you need some stash enhancement along with a pair of earplugs.
Oh yeah, and a continuous supply of Horton’s coffee, cold beer and wine as your mood suits, delivered to you by Joe in the buff, wherever and whenever you please! 😉
Guh.
hope he enjoys have nice soft hands from the dish soap
Dude is so cruisin’ for dishpan hands.
Rock on, Samantha. Now you HAVE to learn that solo, because the only just reward for that ultimatum is that Joe suffer. Get on it, girl.
Much as I enjoyed hearing that song again, um, it’s really easy. I could have played that on my cello in elementary school! About the only challenge, besides looking so excited about something simple and the bad hair, is there’s a bit of syncopation in there. Couldn’t he have at least opted for a bit of Hendrix?
And if she does get out of washing dishes, that means Joe takes over for the duration, right?
Ellie came to mind instantly for the 80’s shoulder pads look.
Good luck. My mom would say, “Breathe, dear, breathe.”
So who fill’s in for the musician and does the dishes?
And is Joe going to be washing Samantha’s share of the dishes for the rest of eternity? Is he going to take you to the emergency room when you rip out your own eardrums? And is he going to pay for your cochlear implants when you decide that you do, in fact, want to hear again, presumably after Sam leaves for college?
My son is a former drummer turned solo guitarist who sincerely believes that he is the long lost identical, albeit 10 years younger, twin of Dave Matthews. I feel your pain!
I’m pretty sure Subsection 3, Paragraph 12b covers it: “Husbands may be overruled by an overwhelming majority vote taken of blog commentators.”
That should do it. Well, that and a honkin’ big bottle of Screech might help.
Being the semi-optimist that I am, after reading this post I thought: “Well, at least he didn’t suggest the riff from Thunderstruck!”
The problem with being the umptieth commenter is that everything funny has been taken.
Anyhoo, the man is mad and I wonder if there is a reason he’s trying to drive you insane…
You’re innocent, completely innocent.
That’s a pretty simple riff. Joe should’ve picked something a tad more difficult — like maybe some Slash. I don’t envy the dispan hands Joe will have soon.
Hmm, beer and screech sales have skyrocketed in Eastern Canada? You don’t say…
Joe is the coolest dad EVER! Ok, sorry…forgot my age there…or the fact that I’m a mother…
Does Joe realize that you will hold this against him for a LONG, LONG time? That you may never completely forgive hime? 30 years ago this summer my husband did something equally unforgivable. We had a 4 year old son, and a 1 year old daughter, and we lived in an apartment complex with a lovely pool. We spent a lot of time at the pool, and our son could swim very well (my husband and I both taught swimming, so all our kids were swimming before they could walk.) Anyway, Gordon was happy, swimming and jumping off the diving board when my husband decided to teach him how to do a front flip off the diving board. Totally freaked me out and ruined my entire summer, since that was literally ALL the kid wanted to do for the rest of the summer. Said kid is now 34, expecting his second child any day, so he did survive. But the husband still hears about his poor judgement!
Hope things work out at your house!
Barbara M.
I believe this is like a relative who lives far away sending a toy to your child that plays annoying music, or makes fire engine noises non-stop, or has a bus full of animal sounds. Unfortunately, this time the “giver” of the noisy gift lives in the same house, and you can’t just conveniently lose it in the garbage.
Riff is good. No dishes is bad. Headphones are excellent. By the way, the links today are wonderfully eclectic.
You have complete immunity – no jury in the world would convict you of any “act” coming on the heels of that…
I agree with the above posts:
– Joe will be doing the dishes himself
– Joe will be purchasing a dishwasher this weekend
AND
– Joe will not be getting “lucky” anytime soon
The other option is to get up in the middle of the night and mess with the sheet music (ever see “Gaslight”????) – so she never learns the damn song.
By all means have her learn that amazingly complex solo (Why not the solo in YYZ though?!) but EEGADS! At HOME?! And no DISHES?? I suppose this means that Joe will be doing her share of dishes? 😉
You have my every sympathy my dear!
Oh.my.hell. Not sure what else to say to that!
This little bet can only keep going on 3 conditions
1. Joe does those dishes (and the rest of the housework)
2. Sam can only play without the amp
3. Joe keeps you in batteries for the noise canceling headphones
My mother (age 94) said it best, “Men and children, you love them before you know better.”
So he’s volunteering to do the dishes for the rest of his life then? Ugh.
Hoo boy – do I ever know what you mean. When Noah was a wee lad of 10, my then-husband bought him a kid-sized drum set (bass, snare, tom-tom and high hat) at a garage sale. We lived in a tiny 2-bedroom apartment, wasn’t even room for the set in his bedroom unless he slept in the bass drum.
I don’t know what’s worse – hearing the same riff over and over on an electric guitar (though it does appear to be a darned nice axe) or hearing a 10-year old try to coordinate foot pedal and two sticks. At least you should occasionally be able to recognize what’s being played, which is a far sight better than what I was hearing.
Maybe you can ask Joe (nicely) if he can also buy her some earphones, so she can plug in and play in privacy? I know you can get ’em somewhere, and if anyone would know, it would be Joe!
And if you need a jury, you can totally call me to sit on it – I’d give you a medal for lasting as long as you have! And no, he’s not my ex because I killed him, but giving the kid drums certainly made me think twice about his judgement.
Headphones for her amp. Quiet for you.
I. Promise. Although, I think AC/DC does give a good beat for garter stitch. Good Luck!
Is there any way to headphone that thing? Because it is only a matter of time before some serious disaster befalls your family with a challenge like that laid down in the summer holidays …..
OMG – does that mean HE will be doing those dishes? Because she is not giving up. Doesn’t he understand that? Maybe that house in the woods is available for you to escape to. Black flies & giant mosquitos would be nothing compared to what you must be going through. Please tell us she isn’t amped!
Back in Black? I’d have picked something much harder, like a Jimi Hendrix tune, or maybe a Stevie Ray Vaughn one. But then I can’t even read music, so what do I know?
Joe really knows how to motivate a teenager.
He’s got a trump up his sleeve.
The dishwasher is in the loading dock as we speak!! Fear not!! (I hope you like the guitar solo!!)
Marlyce in Windsor.
Well, I just asked my 14 year about that solo. Henry spends about 3 hours a day practicing one thing or another and plays reasonably well. He imagines himself as having a future as a lead guitarist in the next big group. His eyes got big and he said ” I think I’d rather do the dishes – that solo seems really simple but it’s really hard”.
And Joe´s going to start doing them, right? Right?
You poor soul.
I’ll light a candle for you.
Apparently, Joe is angling for *you* to find employment outside the home – by driving you batty; thus leaving him with a tidy space to do. . . . whatever it is he does when he’s not breaking bones and making rash promises.
And I can’t take anything out on innocent Samantha – after all, she’s wearing penguin flannels!
I may be showing my age, but I would have held out for “Machine Gun” by Jimi Hendrix or better yet the teeth solo Jimi did on “Hey Joe.” Hmmm, “Hey Joe” now there’s a good song, huh? Tell him “Hey Joe, the dishes are waiting for’ya”
I’m assuming you threw something at his head after that ultimatum, preferably something heavier than your latest project.
I believe it’s time to invoke what I lovingly refer to as the “Mommy veto” clause. My husband and stepson hate hearing it, but it comes in handy during stressful periods such as these. Trust me – our apartment has been spared excessive amounts of pets/gadgets/etc. that we wouldn’t have been able to afford because of this lovely clause.
By which of course he meant he would be taking over her share of the dishes from now on…
i am thinking he must have had his fingers crossed behind his back, and that means he was fibbing, right?
Ya know, now would be a good time to take that scat chart I gave you for a walk in the woods–Joe can come too! I’m sure you can find SOMEthing out in the Canadian wilderness that would think Joe a rather tasty snack–no jury in the land would convict you!
Funny guy, that Joe.
And apparently he likes washing dishes as much as AC/DC.
Take a deep breath. Take many deep breaths. Then buy rubber gloves and dish soap for Joe and go knit!
Sara
i certainly hope that joe is the one who will be picking up the dishwashing position once your teen masters the riff and is off the hook forever! or did he maybe not think that far ahead??? 🙂
Sorry, didn’t hear a word you said. My son is a drummer.
Oh. My. God. I’m really trying to come up with a scenario that would be worse, thinking that you could say to yourself, “It could be worse, it could be (name the worse thing here).” But I can’t. I am soooo sorry.
But does this mean that Joe will now be doing the dishes your daughter isn’t doing? Is that the silver lining? It doesn’t mean you’ll be doing more dishes at the end of this, does it???
Quick,create a diversion & steal or cut the guitar strings–it may be your only hope—
That there is an eee-lectric guitar. They work with headphones, they do. I have it on good authority.
Especially for the practicing therewith.
You have multiple daughters; are they taking up the dishwashing slack this feat will (presumably) leave open in the washup schedule, or is that something Joe offered all on his own account (dear man) ?
hee.
thank you for your design and practice commentary; I figure if you can stitch and rip and re-do the math and finally get somewhere as sool as that sweater’s going to be when it’s donedonedone, I can continue learning too.
Headphones…for you and her.
Or its back to the cabin in the woods..remember quiet.
At least Joe knows how to motivate a girl. Tell him next time to use his power good rather than evil.
He should have given her a time frame and set her to learning the guitar solo in anything by Dragonforce. They’re like… 80 seconds long if not more.
Obviously Joe is in some deranged medicated state which means he is in no position to make any kind of binding legal agreements.
That’s it yeah!
He’s not in traction yet?!
On this side of the Detroit River, there is something called justifiable homicide. Some married knitting friends and I were discussing it just the other evening. Just make certain that there are several married or previously married women on the jury, and it’s a slam dunk (VBG).
Well, I’m not really suggesting it, but sometimes you just have to wonder: what WAS he thinking?
at least it’s not smoke on the water, la bamba, and taps like around here. . .
You know, I’d be completely with you and everyone else in the comments about Joe doing the dishes, except for the fact that Back in Black is almost certainly fiendishly hard. Joe wasn’t actually being that dumb. Or reckless, except for saying it in front of you.
At least he has great taste in music. 😉
Joe’s idea. Joe can do the dishes.
Big dogs. That’s all men are: big dogs that talk. Tell Joe he’d better practice his dishscrubbing. As for the solo, I’m sorry she’ll be ruining such a decent piece of music for you. My next door neighbor drove me to drink when she was learning “Don’t Cry for Me, Argentina” on the piano. Every day. For two years.
It could be worse. Yes it could. Picture an 10 year old (me) playing Lady of Spain on the accordian over and over again. LOUD. I never really did get it and they took it away from me.
Well, I’m a chick rocker from way back, and my parents managed to live through 20 years of my playing, including many Iron Maiden/Rush bass lines, Journey vocals, and Metallica guitar parts… so can you. 🙂
Hey, I can teach “Back in Black” to her if you want. And “Thunderstruck”? I’d like to know how a guitar warmup became a song… that is the musical equivalent of Chinese Water Torture!
(Joe, come on…)
He’s dead.
And she does realize this is only while she is at home right? When she is on her own she will be doing dishes.
Huh. He does realize that when he says “never” it includes the time after she moves out. So dear dad will be coming over daily to wash dishes. You might point that out to her. And then him. That should be punishment enough for him. Maybe.
Oh my. I don’t know what else to say. But as EZ was often quoted as saying, “Knit on, through all difficulties……..”
Those are fighting words! His he offering to do her turn at the dishes?
Seriously?
I love the optimism of those who believe Joe will survive your reaction to Sam’s constant, dedicated, diligent practicing of the same damn thing over and over and over and over and over and over and over again while you’re trying to work to be able to take over her share of the dishes.
I have some of those noise cancelling headphones folks have mentioned previously. Dandy things.
I would so kill him, after I smashed the guitar into pieces.
Well, another option could be to get the sound piped into headphones, assuming that is an electric guitar…
Now THAT’S a jury I’d love to be on!
Blessed Lord love a duck !!!! i fliped over to the link and wish I hadn’t . Are those guys for real and running loose? Seems to me like they need medical help for seizures or something and the “”music ??”” is just horrible noise to me and not a nice noise either. As for Joe making new rules for the household with out colaberation with you makes any rule he has made null and void doesn’t it ? No wonder you are having trouble with designing and knitting this sweater. Perhaps it’s time to go into isolation again. Good Luck
What the hell????? Why didn’t he just poke out your eyes and set fire to all of your knitting supplies. This is a gross miscarriage of justice. I wouldn’t even have done such a thing to my EX husband. Much less the adorable man I’ve been happily married to for 27 years last week. MAN Steph! You must take action. Where was that cabin in the woods???? You think it’s as peaceful with Spring rain as it was with snow??? You might need to find out. OR….don’t pay your power bill. At least the noise will be manageable. I feel for you. Do you have a room you could pad???? OH! New use for yarn stash. Pack it against the walls for noise reduction. Carefully of course!
Get her listening to BB King, or Stevie Ray, or John L. Hooker. At least the blues is tolerable…. But actually, Pink Floyd is some bad a…. guitar soloing, or Van Halen, or ……
Sorry I digress. My son is 22 years old this year. I think I’ve lived through it all. ugh, Green Day.
I sure hope you like that song.
but if she’s really good she has an excuse to not do the dishes because it will soften her callouses. Vacuuming, on the other hand, does nothing to guitar hands.
Okay … that’s enough sympathy .. it’s time to consider solutions ! It’s summer there … how about the garage as a studio for the musician ?
or renting her a studio ? or a muffler for the guitar ?
I’m not a musician so I don’t know the technology of it all but my dear college friend practiced late in the night in the dorm without making noise … and it worked for her !
Let’s see … a few more creative ideas: buy a dishwasher and make the deal null and void; hire a dishwasher and make it lucrative for her to want to do the dishes; stop providing meals so no one has to wash dishes.
I’m sure there are many more clever solutions – much more clever than mine – creative knitters start thinking solutions !!!!
the guitar solo from “back in black”? you married a man who would trade dishes for… “back in black”? seriously. there are like a *thousand* guitar solos more worthy of dish absolution.
h0ly cr@p. the man had better be seriously cute.
Dear Steph: remember how proud you were when Samantha learned to knit and purl?
Dear Sam: Go for it, kiddo!
http://www.e-tabs.org/tab/ac_dc/back_in_black_(solo)
Dear Joe: I hope you realize that when she can play it, her dish night becomes YOUR dish night.
Joe’s gonna be doing a lot of dishes is all I can say.
So, is your concern the incessant practice or the fact that she might not be doing the dishes? I think that part of proving the solo should be wearing the British school boy uniform while performing.
Earplugs. And ear covers. and headphones for Sam for her electric guitar.
On another note, I have been vacationing in your wonderful country this past week. New Brunswick, PEI and now Halifax. WE LOVED PEI!!! More quilt fabric than yarn, but I’ll forgive them. Here in Halifax we tried to turn into our hotel (Holiday Inn, Dartmouth) and ended up in line for the big bridge. So, as we pulled a U-turn before the pay booth, a lovely Canadian rolled down his window and asked whether we were lost. We nodded yes and laughed. He also laughed and said, “Go ahead and do a U turn, no one will mind.” Love that man! Love the drivers who smiled and waved us on! O, Canada, Go Canada. We love you.
I’m surprised that once you recovered from the shock that you didn’t whip your yarn into a bow and shoot a knitting needle at him.
Didn’t you say something about people being cautious when in the presense of someone with two pointy sticks in their hands??
Just remember it could be worse – I played oboe and violin growing up, the two most horrific sounding beginning instruments (I have no idea how my family put up with it). That, and I played “Everything I Do I Do It For You” for about seven months straight on the piano once I figured out that it drove my father insane (I was 13 years old, and I was angry about forced practice time, what can I say?)
Oh dear God.
I cracked up, then read this to Dave as a warning, should he ever consider anything so foolish when we someday have teenagers, since this is the same sort of thing that he thrives on – ridiculous challenges that end up making me crazy.
You have my sympathies.
Having been the first one to mention grey gansey yesterday, I thank rams and Presbytera for vetoing that thought. Under the circumstances, spin for yourself. And Joe definitely has lifetime dish duty – no one legged excuses.
Wouldn’t ‘Tangled Up in Blue’ be better?
erstwhile = : former, previous, as in
Did you really mean this about your DH???
I feel your pain! My son is a drummer, so I know where of I speak. Blessings to you and Joe. Y’all will need it. P.S. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one to rip and reknit (more than once)
He promised what?
String him up from the yard arm!
And hand him the dishrag, ’cause ain’t NO way you have do to the dishes after he’s done this to you.
He’s washing the floor with a toothbrush right now… isn’t he?
Said as only a man can. . . sigh. I hope that means he’s volunteering to do the dishes for her?
That means HE is doing the dishes on her turn for the rest of her life, right?
Yes, of course that’s right!!!! He should live up to every one of those words…….
As a guitar player, I gotta say, DUDE.
There is no way out of the dishes. And when I was a teenager, I totally tried, on the grounds that it hosed my calluses. Uh, don’t let Samantha read that.
No way out of the dishes. That’s final.
blech! Men in Black!
How about listening to ‘I’m goin home” Woodstock ~ Alvin Lee & 10 years after ? Never again will U hear a guitar in the same way ! The openings riffs will take your breath away!
And … in MHO … if they (yer kids) create the mess they shud be helping to erase it ! (laundry, dishes, odd things in the fruit bowls, floors, etc.) * shrugs*
But, then again … maybe U shud Quit Whining about yer kids … YOU are blessed! YOU are their Mum ..U laid the rules …. *shrugs* Perhaps You created more than U bargained for….. Maybe ? …” U shud move along ?”
I be the proud single parent to a special needs person.
You have my envy, on some days … but … then … some days not ! *shrugs*
without predudice,
respectfully posted,
Piney 🙂
Oakville, Ontario, Canada
1)Well, at least Joe picked a good song *g*
2)No jury in the world would convict you, not even one of AC/DC fans 😉
3)To the poster who suggested Dragonforce solos – you’re evil! *snerk* I’ve watched those being played on Guitar Hero, and that would be even *worse* than hearing the Back in Black riff for an entire summer…
(P.S. To the commenter who made the crack about Thunderstruck – I went to university at Lakehead U in Thunder Bay ON. Our fieldhouse was known as the Thunderdome and opposition teams hated playing there because we were the loudest fans in the OUAA (hell, a busload of us outdid a gym full of Brock fans – in Brock – during PLAYOFFS *evil grin*) Our men’s basketball starting lineup was introduced every game to the sounds of Thunderstruck, which always got the crowd rocking and the bleachers shaking… and “beginner’s riff” or not, I still can’t help rocking out to that song *G*)
What was Joe thinking?
The guitar solo from Back in Black is in no way worth getting out of the dishes forever. Tell her she must learn Cliffs of Dover note-perfect in its entirety to get out of dishes.
Guitar solo. Honestly. Pheh.
Now, I’ve never met Joe, but I’m sure he’s a delightful human being… a generous & kind man… a loving partner & friend.
But he must have lost his freakin’ mind to tell Samantha that. What the hell?!
Tell her to learn how to play “Barracuda” by Heart. Then try anything by Derek Trucks. Finally “All Along the Watchtower,” the Hendrix version.
Then she can get out of doing the dishes.
Joe? I think you need a good temporary insanity defense.
One word: EARPLUGS!
Back in Black is a great song but I’m so glad I don’t live in your house right now.
Hey, Thunderstruck is not bad of a song…..I just can’t imagine sitting calmly while someone is learning it! Sweet mother of God.
Sheesh – I feel your pain. When I was in Jr. High (they don’t have that anymore – it was 7th/8th grade) my next door neighbor’s son started a band. They practiced outside on the driveway. The only song they knew was Smoke on the Water. And then, you add the dishes issue – wow – my mind can’t even get a handle on that!
Yes, it is very sweet of Joe to volunteer to do Samantha’s dishes as a way to encourage her in her musical endeavors!
Umpteenthing the headphones and amp. He can pony up for that since he set it up. I’d imagine since he is also working out of your home, that it wouldn’t take too many hints to get him to procure a set.
Grab the guitar, rip off the strings and knit a scrubby, for Sam to use when doing the dishes.
Give him a break! He got stuck w/three girls and one bathroom! But give her some ani difranco to balance it out fortheloveofmohair!
If it means he’s buying you and her a dishwasher, go for it. Obviously that’s the only thing he COULD have meant.
If you listened very closely I’m sure that was Joe saying “I personally volunteer to wash dishes every night for the rest of my natural life.” That is what he said, right?
PS. I just had my son play Thunderstruck and Back in Black so that I know what everyone is talking about (…recognized the tunes, but not the titles) Like ’em, but wouldn’t want to listen to ’em over’n’over – e-gad! Now I feel for you even more.
Why don’t you suggest this instead
–Zepplin “Stairway to Heaven”–
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKg4g9zMeHI&feature=related
Why don’t you suggest this instead
–Zeppelin “Stairway to Heaven”–
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lKg4g9zMeHI&feature=related
did you record some of your guitar solos?
🙂
come by
http://www.ozzchan.com
Does she have to do the head thing too? Ouch.
And I love Designing Women. That was the best show in spite of the big hair and shoulder pads. So glad that was your example-it only proves you are an aficionado of the “what were we thinking” fashion era.
Have fun with that guitar….
Never underestimate a teen with a purpose. Especially a purpose which liberates her from household slavery. If one of my parents had offered me such a deal, I don’t care if I had to play it solely with my big toe and right earlobe, I’d have found a way. I’ll be looking for a report soon.
The only appropriate response is a series of wild, hysterical laughter followed by a long pause, a deep stare at Joe, and then “Are you out of your MIND?” Then you laugh hysterically again, this time picking up a kitchen knife, just for effect, of course.
That’ll teach him.
“If you learn to play the guitar solo from Back In Black, you will never have to do the dishes again.”
That’s okay, I’ve promised my son that if he wins the Nobel Peace Prize, that I’ll get a tattoo. His response was “Can I pick the tattoo & where it goes?”
– Denise
Can I assume she’s moved on from the french horn? Or is this a new musical pursuit?
It’s going to be a long hot summer at chez Harlot.
currently knitting rainbow socks in Noro Kureyon sock color #182
So is Joe going to do the dishes when it would be Samantha’s turn? Does he want to take on some of her chores? (Couldn’t he spend that time, y’know, learning to play the “Back in Black” solo himself?)
However, as a teen, I would SO do that. And I’ve never even played Guitar Hero. (But I want to).
Joe is going to be doing a lot of dishes.
Now where are those noise-cancelling headphones that you bought for the plane?
i’m assuming that would mean knitters who are married to sound guys of one sort or another, and mothers of teen agers? i qualify, lol! (except my teens are boys, not girls, and my hubby taught my son to play iron man on his trombone last summer. i may never enjoy ozzie osbourne again!)
As long as she doesn’t wear the short pants outfit.
Please, please,,,,, I’ll send my son up north to you,,,, you can send your daughter down south to me. The way my kid does dishes (if he does it), he might as well just take the dirty dishes and put them away like that!
On the other hand I do so love AC/DC,,,,,, 😉
He told her what??!!! And he’s still breathing? You are a far better woman than I, he’d have been buried in the back yard by now. Ear plugs are a beautiful thing though, know anyone who works around planes, helicopters, metal work? Those are the mega ear plugs, they drown out just about everything, and they might make summer easier all around (hard to mediate arguments you can’t hear)
You don’t have to accept this.
and he is still breathing?
i cannot BELIEVE he is still breathing. omg.. i cannot even wrap my head around that one.
in a house containing 2 electric/3 acoustic guitars and.. 2 teens/2 pre-teens, i pray that those words never leave the mouth of an adult.
The pants!!! Samantha’s pants!!! I love them!!!
So………Exactly what kind of pain medication is Joe on for his foot? I think you should give him more and then tell him that you want to open your own yarn store! (Or take a knitting cruise and then buy a house in Tuscany, etc. You get my drift.)
Nope, Eric Roche’s ‘Roundabout’ is the thing to learn for getting out of dish doing (here is my friend Dave playing it, I find it quite astonishing!):
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljeUnXvUVDw
I am storing this up for when our Alex is old enough to be striking such bargains ;o)
I am assuming that Joe has some sort of death wish??
Rules of operation-Engage brain before opening mouth.Either he is doing the dishes or finding an alternate (surely their must have been another carrot that could have been offered)
For those with a drummer in the house-play with brushes not sticks (my husbands solution) he tippy taps away to keep his chops up and does not make us or the neighbors crazy He also plays along with headphones on to rehearse
Guitar players-go acoustic, unplugged or headphones
He bought her a set of earphones to plug into the guitar, so only she has to listen to the music and the rest of you just hear the scratch of the pick on the strings… and Samantha’s muffled commentary on the process. Right??
Sorry…I’m with Joe on this one. Love Back in Black. Thank God she’s not learning drums.
Maybe Joe forgot to finish the sentence, which should have gone, “…because I am going to surprise your mother with an automatic dishwasher.”
I don’t know about Canada but I think that it would be ruled justifiable homicide here in the US.
OMG, that’s all they need, isn’t it? Oh well, I’m sure he can save it by saying, “I was merely pointing out that if you can play the guitar well enough to execute that solo, then you will at some point be financially able to hire a maid.” Yeah…that works.
Ang
My reaction: cringe.
My husband’s reaction: “Awesome. I like him.”
Joe. Is grounded. And maybe brilliant… (cause he’s scoring the Daddy points here) and I suggest YOU learn to play it before Samantha does. If Joes gonna toss around edicts like that- he better be prepared to deal. And do dishes.
Crap- I’ll learn to play it, if Joe’s rule crosses international borders… think it’ll work?
And I admit- I like that song…;) I’m and 80’s rock kind of girl. (also 70’s and 60’s… just NO disco.. hate that)
Oh dear. Having lived through the stage with a couple musicians, all I can say is knit more. Knit ear plugs.
So Sorry….Better than “We Will Rock You” though!
Ummm . . . hope he likes paper plates and plastic cups. Nothing makes a 14-year-old more determined than the promise of no dishes. Nothing.
Forgot to say- the sweater is turning out gorgeous:)
Man oh man, I do love that song. If for no other reason than it is the song they play when my dear college football team is leaving the locker room and entering the field. But under those circumstances…wow…I would probably go mad.
Two words spring to mind: Justifiable. Homicide.
wow. sounds like joe is going to be washing a lot of dishes from now on!
From a parent of one current and two former teen-agers:
The answer is obvious – Joe will be doing the dishes while Samantha serendes him!
Wow! I did not realize Joe loved doing dishes. Be sure he remembers to use lots of lotion afterwards, if he chooses not to wear gloves. Does he clean ovens too?
completely off topic – I know you’re a fan of Terry Pratchett also – his webiste indicates he has been diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s….
Have to side w/ Joe on this one…but this coming from a mom who’s about to buy a drum set for her 10 year old…it’s going in the garage…which is detached.
Realistically that would nearly count as cheating – as much as I love AC/DC (I am Australian, after all) they only use about three chords…
Make sure Joe gets the ‘mild on your hands’ detergent.
I feel your pain!! My daughter is LEARNING to play the violin! The violin is a beautiful instrument when one already knows how to play it. However, the learning part sounds like a cat that has been tossed into the clothes dryer!!! Buy Joe some good lotion…he will have dishpan hands for years to come!
Hmmmm, comment something like this. Your dad said that did he, Did I mention insanity runs in his side of the family, this may have one of those moments. Now here is a dish towel, don’t hurt yourself on the way to the sink.
She’s gonna be the coolest girl in town! She won’t have time for dishes.
Don’t think Joe thot that one thru too well.
The summer I was 13, I decided to teach myself to play “House of the Rising Sun” on grandma’s piano during an extended family visit. That was 37 years ago. My sisters still groan/laugh whenever they hear that song.
You’re going to have a serious AC/DC earworm.
No sympathy here, I live with a 17 yr old who wants to be a professional percussionist. His lesson teacher told him to practice 8 hours a day. He took him seriously. (There is also a brother who plays the Horn, trumpet, guitar and bass.)
Hmmmm…a challenge! The youngster will jump at it. If you do not have a dishwasher, invest in one. Does loading and unloading the dishwasher TECHNICALLY mean wash the dishes? AND, the dishwasher should come from Joe?
Whoooah Nellie! OK – either a) he thinks she won’t be able to do it; or b) he’s providing incentive for her to practice; or c) he needed a serious excuse to be allowed to wash dishes forever. Or he knows that when she CAN play it he can line her up a record deal and you can all live on her royalties……I’m old, and not familiar with that tune, but add in if she can also master “Foggy Mountain Breakdown” she’s free of room-cleaning. (My best bud’s a professional musician and it took him LONG TIMES to perfect that one! Otherwise – yeah, buy her the headphones and buy him a BIG bottle of Dawn ™ dishwashing soap. Hope HE doesn’t play guitar; he’s going to have some seriously mushy hands.
Dear Joe:
How nice of you to offer your own time as a permanent dishwasher as an incentive for your daughter to master a musical piece. This shows just how much you are committed to your family! Very impressive!
BTW, did you know that most home improvement stores carry rubber gloves (like the ones Playtex makes here in the USA for dish washers) in their paint supply section? They work wonderfully for men with LARGE hands, as my husband will attest. I suggest you make a special trip to get some so that they are on hand when you notice your nails and cuticles beginning to dry out.
Another suggestion: putting a good hand lotion on before going to sleep really helps dishpan hands also. Best of luck! Kathlene in Iowa!
Dump him.
Oh wait, it seems you already did: you called him your “erstwhile husband.”
🙂
I bet you didn’t really mean that.
~Priscilla
editrix by profession
Ah, gee, thanks, Joe. Offering the kid an out on a job you probably aren’t at all interested in assuming for the long haul.
No jury in the world, Steph.
I grew up hearing my brother’s band play one Chicago song until it was burned into my brain. One word of advice for you: earplugs!
That just cracked me up.
Poor Steph! Love those cute pajama pants Sam! Rock on….
Yikes!!
Who put him in charge of dishes in the first place? He can’t even put the coffee mugs away properly.
What song does she have to learn to get out of vacuuming? God, I detest vacuuming. I would rather live in a hut with a dirt floor than vacuum.
Keep playin’, girl.
Well, at least it’s not a drum solo…
My only comment: we have given my daughter last year the same Guitar (Gibson’s SG) and my husband told her… : if you do compose 5 songs (lyrics and music) I will pay for studio… well that was last Summer: she now has 7 ready and we are heading for studio… Plus, we had a couple of musician friends (bass and drums) who liked it so much they offered their help. Not bad for a 15-yr old !! And at school she was part of a small Blues band in which she was singing (that’s besides playing flute in the harmony). The school direction thought they were so good, they paid for the studio time and the kids sold CDs on the condition that all profits would be given to charity: they chose MS as the recording guy was suffering from it – not bad !!! Very proud of her: she is busy but as in good busy so I can’t complain.
Whimper…
Dare I point out to all commenters that nowhere in that post did it say “if you learn the solo I will do the dishes”. No tit for tat. All it said is “you won’t have to”. When does the dish fairy arrive?
PS I agree with Rams. No gansey yarn for tour de fleece.
It could have been “Seven Nation Army” by the White Stripes.
If I have to listen to that again, I may have to resort to undignified swigging from the vodka bottle!!
What makes us think giving 14 years olds electric guitars is a good idea?
Hey, at least she is learning on a real instrument (and not just playing endless rounds of Guitar Hero), and it could always be worse. I did a ton of finger picking my way through the entirety of The Wall, which I’m sure drove my parents completely crazy!
Wait, the solo from ‘Highway to Hell’ is way harder…
Oh, gosh. If only my parents made me an offer like that one! :]
“Shoot me, just shoot me now! No wait, shoot me again just to make sure.” September is still a long way off.
There are much better guitar solos than that one. Joe is nuts.
Kill him.
they get to go to the cabin this time
I say it’s a good trade!
Well, the only conclusion one can draw from this statement is that Joe is at the ready to take over that task at the occasions she was to do it.
If I were you, I’d learn that guitar solo real soon!
As an American, I love Canada, too. It’s pretty and peaceful and the people are nice, at least the ones I have met. It is great to have a friendly neighbor share our border.
And the Gay Rights issue? I am right there with ya on that one, too. Just don’t let the assholes get you down. We know we are right and do not need external validation from the idiot crowd.
All us knitters who say Joe is guilty of not thinking about his future – near or distant – raise your needles in support of Steph completely vetoing this crazy idea! (hopefully we won’t have to block the sun too long before he realizes his error). Just had a scary thought – what will Amanda and Meg say?
Now I love the song as much as anyone but I understand your distraction. Just be glad it’s not a drum solo from the 60’s. Remember Iron Butterfly???
Let the girl play.
Does this mean Joe is going to be doing the dishes instead?
Oh my- it doesn’t even sound that difficult either!! I hope she doesn’t have to sing the lyrics along with it. HA HA
Well, she has her work cut out for her. Angus Young is one of the better axe-men out there, for sure.
If I had to learn a guitar solo, it’s definitely one *I’d* pick. (But I love AC/DC, so I’m biased, hehe)
Might I suggest a pair of quality earplugs?;)
Headphones-order quick-it doesnt’ matter what they cost or what the cost of “overnighting” may be-ORDER or start wearing your Bose noise eliminator headphones 24-7.
Who is he trying to punish here? And what horrible crime did they commit?
Well, if I were going to give someone a free pass to never be “Dish-Girl” again, I’d have picked a much harder guitar solo. At least Stevie Ray Vaughn difficult! 🙂 Joe is much, much too easy on the girl!
Bose noise eliminator headphones worn 24-7. Just Who is Joe trying to punish here?? What horrible crime was committed?
Or headphones for the electric guitar-overnighted-it doesn’t matter what they cost or the cost of overnighting just order them.
Can’t necessarily excuse it, but perhaps Joe figured it was a safe bet, though I have no idea how well Samantha can play.
Never mind the noise as she learns it; the prospect of four years (full-time)without her touching a dish would be enough to freeze my brain–instantly.
Well… It seems implied in Joe’s words that Sam will have to continue to do the dishes unless she masters that solo, so the dishes will continue to get done. The choice of solo could definitely be worse. If she wears headphones on her guitar, then she will be absorbed in her activity, leaving you in peace. If there are headphones and no amps, then I’d say it was a smart move for Joe to say that. If not, and you have to listen to it out loud in the house at all hours, then perhaps some conditions and restrictions could be negotiated. At least it is a solo with a good rhythm for knitting, provided you don’t drop a stitch every time she makes a mistake. 🙂
Hey, I will try this with my family – my BIL just gave me a beautiful electric guitar to start learning and that is awesome motivation for me (love AC/DC and BIB is the best they EVER did!!!) to get a promise like that out of my family (DH, DDs 12, 18, 24) ;))) As they all like AC/DC, too, they might do the dishwasher VOLUNTARILY to musical accompaniment???
ROFL!!!
Well, all I can say is, be thankful that he didn’t tell her that if she learned the drum solo from Inna-godda-da-vida that she wouldn’t have to do the dishes. I’m pretty sure that the guitar solo from Back in Black doesn’t hold a candle to the epic 17 minute song by Iron Butterfly.
My parents were hippies, what can I say…
I’m sorry you had to live through that at that point in your knitting, but dang if I was Sam I’d be all over it too.
oh. my. god.
i am so sorry. looks like joe’s the new dishwasher though…
No jury of any group of parents would convict.
I am cross addicted as a potter – I would be happy to have ALL of Joe’s own guitar strings, in use and new, as wire tools for the studio we use.
Ask Joe if he’s familiar with grit-ball…many more comments like that may bring it home to him.
Um. Sorry. Been there. Never need to hear Eric Clapton’s “White Room” again. Ever.
Oh come on! Forget the AC/DC! What about Canada’s own RUSH??? Now there are some difficult guitar solos (and timing–who can keep up with the time changes from 3/8 to 7/8 to 4/4 without completely blowing their minds) Learning some “native” Canadian music would POSSIBLY be worth Joe doing the dishes until the end of time.
Oh my…..that’s just not right.
Surely, what he MEANT was, “you will never have to do the dishes again because I, your father, will be so impressed that I’ll do them for you whenever it’s your turn.” That must have been his intent, don’t you think? Because he, the father, doesn’t want to wake to find himself knitted to the headboard, now does he?
I love your husband!!! I think this is an awesome challenge! This is one of the most recognizable guitar licks ever! (It also happens to be my cell phone ringtone!) Let us know when she’s got it down—give us some audio and video, if possible. I LOVE IT!
Does she have to do the head-banging motions while playing? Choreography always seems to make the task take longer to master.
Steph? That remote cabin in the woods…send Joe AND Sam AND the guitar and tell them not to come back until she’s mastered it and you’ve had the dishwasher installed. Should be a lovely summer for you :>)!
As a mom of 9, all of whom play a musical instrument (though blessedly, band instruments with mostly actual good music), I’d be on your jury in a heartbeat!
I don’t suppose she could be persuaded to practice without actually plugging in the amp, right? That would be a fairly workable solution…behind closed doors….on the other side of the house.
I’m all for encouraging talent in our kids, but there are lines to be drawn!
Now, did he mean on Guitar Hero or a real guitar? Big Difference!!!
With my husband and son it was the fiddle solo from “The Devil Went Down to Georgia” and it was strictly a cash transaction.
My husband the musician/producer rolled his eyes. “He should have at least made it “Yes”. Or “Van Halen”. Or the guitar solo from Steely Dan’s “My Old School” on Countdown to Ecstasy.
Because if she can play those, she doesn’t need to do dishes, she needs a recording contract.
Otherwise: he’s in trouble.”
I was too lazy to read all the comments and someone may have already suggested that the trade off is that Joe will have to do ALL the dishes if Samantha completes the quest. He just didn’t see the fine print in the contract. And Samantha, bonus points for playing the solo in motion as the original. The costume is up to you.
Egads! This is almost as bad as the week I was at an archaeological research center, the same week 40 8-th graders were present. And 2 of them kept playing the theme song from “Mission Impossible” on the piano. Morning, noon, night, during meals, whenever they weren’t in class. Finally, the camp/researchers in charge had to ban them from the piano. Whimper.
Oy. Vey. For Joe: NO more socks, no gansey, no “getting lucky” any time soon unless HE gets headphones for the amp, washes the dishes when it’s Sam’s turn, and gets off those pain pills which must be seriously frying his brain for him to make such a suggestion!
If I were you, I’d pack yarn, bug repellent, wine and chocolate and head for the lovely cabin in the woods!
I really hope Joe is planning on taking Samatha’s dish turn. I know you’re a good mom, but perhaps there is a way the output from the guitar or the amp could be sent to headphones? Sure, your kid loses her hearing, but at least you keep your sanity…I know, I know (bad mom, no cookie).
Back in Black is tough to overcome. Gameboy is currently a “fan” of death metal (it’s okay, you can shudder) and plays it incessantly. I’ve never been so thankful for having a job outside the house.
If she’s NEVER doing dishes again he should have picked a harder solo.
I vote you un-string the guitar and knit it into a swatch. Surely they’ll never suspect the knitting.
If my father had said that to me when I was 15, he and I both would have been dead within the week and my mother would have been acquitted. If there’s any justice in the world.
Lord a’mercy, what a terrible thing to say to a teenager. I mean, I absolutely applaud her musicality and his encouragement. But, dude, dishes must be done.
My kid wanted a drum set – I said we can’t have a drum set because we don’t have a garage. Now he just plays his ipod. With headphones. Unless I like the band. And he puts away the clean dishes, since I cook.
The sweater is divine. I love it!! the color, the pattern… I know it’s been work, but man! You have a gorgeous product!
OMG! I hope my son doesn’t hear about that. He plays that song EVERY SINGLE DAY. And we still make him do the dishes.
Courage sister. I’ll be on your jury if you’ll be on mine. My guitar player is 16 and he’s got the Back in Black solo down pat – except for the timing – which he plays exactly the same wrong way every blessed time. *gives a Hepburn shake ‘o the head*
You go girl- I’m working on the same solo. maybe if i’d had an electric guitar at a younger age i’d be working on another solo… plug in and rock on!!!!!!!!!!!
Dude. Get out the Screech. You’re going to need it.
I dunno, Back in Black is an excellent rif. Course that DOES mean Joe has to take over her dish washing duties since he made the promise.
I think he’s come up with the perfect bribe to learn it! Duuude! *two half-ironic thumbs up*
And Joe doing the dishes for her FOREVER? Priceless. ^_^
Is Joe taking her turn?